billy bad breaks

This post has nothing to do with its title, but after staring at this for 20 minutes trying to come up with one, I just grabbed the first song title I could find. Thanks, The Damned. Once again, you come through when I need you.

We've had a drought in Southern California for so long now, even a little rain is cause for our local news to go apeshit with STORMWATCH!!11!!1 coverage. This week, though, we've had serious storms that have produced tornadoes, mudslides, flooding, and all sorts of things that every other part of the country that actually has weather can just shrug off.

I've spent even more time than usual inside writing this week as a result of the cold and wet weather, and I've made some good progress on a few projects including a short work of fiction and Memories of the Future, Volume Two.

Working on Memories Volume 2 has been a lot of fun, even though there aren't as many atrocious episodes in the back half of the first season. The stronger episodes are more enjoyable to watch, of course, but it's the really lousy ones that are the most fun to recap and make fun of. (Too Short A Season was a fucking goldmine, but Coming Of Age was a real challenge because – even though it's all Wesley, all the time – it's really good.)

Anyway, while working on Arsenal of Freedom this week (which starts out strong and has some great character moments for Geordi, but doesn't quite fulfill its promise), I wrote some Picard/Beverly slashfic* as part of a joke. I suppose I could have taken some anti-nausea meds and gone searching for some existing work to copy and paste, but I thought it would be funnier if I actually wrote it myself. You'll have to wait for the release (or maybe even the relevant Futurecast) to experience it, but I thought some of you may want to know that I got all of 41 words before I made myself throw up in my mouth and had to stop.

I hope the sacrifices I make for comedy are appreciated, he said, in his best passive/aggressive grandmother tone.

Well, it's raining like crazy again and there's a clown in the storm drain, so I'd better get back to work. Skin of Evil isn't going to snark all over itself, you know.

* It has been brought to my attention that "slashfic" is the term used to describe fanfiction where two dudes get all teabaggy and swordfighty whatnot. I have always been under the impression that any fanfic involving sexytime was called "slash" or some derivative thereof, regardless of the genders or alien races involved. Upon discovering that I have been incorrect about the finer points of this particular world for my entire life … I'm really okay with that.

59 thoughts on “billy bad breaks”

  1. Wil,
    Slightly off-topic… Though I’m trilled you’re working on Volume Two. My wife and I totally enjoyed Volume One.
    I just finished listening to the audiobook of “Just a Geek”. So, so impressed by you, man. I was six when “TNG” premiered and I watched every episode. I was so sad when Wesley went away. Every time he showed up after leaving, it was my favorite episode ever.
    I’m so glad you’re writing. I’m so glad you’re happy. I’m so glad I can keep up with one of my childhood role models. Come to think of it, I’m glad I can keep up with one of my role models as an adult too.

  2. I’ve always known slash to be any pairing that is not directly endorsed by the canon. While it is typically same-sex pairings, slash can be used to posit sexual relations between any characters, same-sex or not. Learned this in a class on Cult TV. I agree with RazorBunny and so does my professor.

  3. I’m glad the wet weather is helping you write! I think that is why so many writers live in the Pacific Northwest. It’s somehow comforting to curl up with the laptop, looking outside at gray skies, and rain drawing lines down the window. Let the creativity flow!

  4. To be perfectly honest, “skin of evil” practically DOES snark itself. All you would need to do is have a picture of the “ZOMG MOLASSES MONSTER THING! WHUAGHAHA!” and write “Need I say more?” underneath.
    I first saw that episode when I was 5 (first run of the episode). It scared the bejeezus out of me then. I look at it now and think “What kind of drugs was tiny tyke me smoking?”
    Then again, the bathtub scene in “Ghostbusters 2″ scared me when I was a kid, too. Maybe I just had an irrational phobia of viscous liquids?

  5. To be perfectly honest, ‘Skin of Evil’ almost does snark itself. All you would need to snark the hell out of that episode is just a picture of the “OMG, MOLASSES MONSTER! WUAGHAHAHA!!!” with a caption that says “Need I say more? Didn’t think so.”
    To be fair, though, I was 5 when that episode was first broadcast and it scared the bejeezus out of me. I look back and wonder what my 5 year old self was smoking in order to get freaked out by a puddle of chocolate syrup.
    Oddly enough, the bathtub scene in Ghostbusters 2 scared me when I was little as well. Maybe I just had a phobia of Viscous liquids?

  6. The origin of “slash” is the “/” put between the names of the two parties involved in the horrible crotch-bumping written thereof. THerefore, I believe, in original intent at least, that slash can be used to describe more than male, gay fan-fiction.

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