Tomorrow, I go back to Eureka

“What’s the forecast for Vancouver?” Anne asked.

“It’s in the 40s and raining,” I said.

“Oh, that sounds awesome,” she said, in a tone of voice that indicated the opposite was actually true.

“It’s okay,” I said, “I have my scarf and my jacket and my warm hat.” As I listed each of these items, I put them into my suitcase. “It’s a little weird to be packing all these warm clothes when it’s 76 and sunny outside, though.”

I counted my jeans and socks and things, to make sure I had enough clothes for the week. I was short a few pairs of jeans, so I emptied the laundry hamper and loaded up the washing machine. While it did its thing, I went into my office and started to assemble my Gabe Bag.

I’m only gone for a week, I thought, and most of the time I’m up there I’ll be working, so I don’t need to bring too much stuff…

I put my Kindle, iPod, and iPad into my bag. I added a copy of Scientific American, and made sure that my headphones were charged.

My cat came into my office, followed closely by my dog. My cat meowed at me.

“Hey Watson,” I said, “What are you d–”

He had a giant lizard in his mouth. I’m no expert on lizard expressions, but I’m fairly certain that it didn’t look happy.

“Is that for me?” I said.

He meowed again, and the lizard broke free, scampering across the floor toward the wall. The dog and cat jumped at it simultaneously, the cat winning the race. He gave the dog the don’t even fucking think about it, dog, look (you cat owners know the one) and laid down across it, protectively.

“Okay, you guys,” I said, “normally, I’d let you have your fun, but this lizard doesn’t look very happy, and I think I’m going to save its life.”

The cat gave me the don’t even fucking think about it, monkey, look. The dog whined.

I picked up the lizard, deftly preventing it from biting the hand that saved it, and put it outside. The dog and the cat sat at the patio door and looked out. I’m fairly sure I heard them cursing me.

I went back into my office and looked around for the other things I’d usually take with me on a trip: games, books, maybe a couple of DVDs … and I realized that everything I needed or wanted (there’s a difference, kids, and it’s important to know it) was already there, on my Kindle and my iPad.

Holy crap, I thought, I really do live in the future.

In one of my books, I wrote about traveling across the country late at night to go to Star Trek conventions every weekend. I remember taking my original Gameboy with me on those trips, and having to pack six or eight or ten extra AA batteries, because I played it so much. I had a light up thing that clipped onto the front of it, and I had a carrying case full of games that was about the size of a 3-ring binder. Today, my DSi could fit inside my old Gameboy, and its battery charger weighs about as much as three old Gameboy games. In that story, I said that it may be hard to imagine a world where the original Gameboy was cutting edge and state of the art, but it's the world where I came of age, and though the world is as fucked up as its ever been, it's still objectively cool to be alive right now.

I closed up my bag, and walked into the back of the house to relate all of this to my wife. She didn’t say anything about how I tell her this every time I pack for a trip, and reminded me to make sure I didn’t have any deadly 4 ounces of toothpaste in my bag, just the entirely safe 3 ounces.

I started to go back to my office. On the way, I opened the patio door for the dog and cat, who gave me the this isn’t over, monkey, look. They walked outside, and I followed them. I may as well enjoy the warm sun while I can, I thought.

I stood out there for a few minutes, listening to the far away drone of the freeway and the occasional song of a bird. Flowers are starting to bloom, and I could smell jasmine and cut grass in the air. I’ll miss my pets and my house and this perfect weather while I’m gone, but it is a small price to pay to be in one of my favorite cities in the world, working with people I love on a show that I'm intensely proud to be part of.

I felt a surge of excitement, knowing that in just two days, I get to play Doctor Parrish again. I really wish that I could talk in detail about what we did in season 4.5, and what's coming up in season 5. I really hate it that we all have to wait until summer to see what we shot last year, but I'm confident that it will be worth the wait.

My cat jumped over the wall, and my dog stretched out on the patio, basking in the sun. “You guys behave yourselves,” I said, as I walked back inside.

I grabbed a glass of water in the kitchen and went back into my office to write about all of this for my blog.

After I’d been writing and rewriting for about 15 minutes, I heard my cat meow at me again from the office door.

“You better not have that lizard again,” I said.

He meowed again, and I heard something hit the floor, then the wall.

I turned around, and saw that my cat had caught a small bird.

“Seriously?” I said.

The bird jumped out of Watson’s reach in a small puff of feathers, and flew toward the living room. I went to the kitchen to figure out how I was going to get this terrified little bird safely out of my house.

Anne came out of the back of the house and asked me what I’d just thrown out the patio door. “Nothing,” I said, “but I have to figure out how to get the bird that Watson caught out of the house.”

“That must have been what I saw,” she said. Watson came walking into the room, a couple of small grey feathers hanging off his mouth.

“From a lizard to a bird in about 40 minutes,” I said. “Suck on that, evolution.”

She looked at me.

“It was funny in my head,” I said.

She continued to look at me.

“I’m just going to go back into my office now and write for a little bit.”

I looked at the cat. “Try not to suck any dicks in the parking lot on your way out.”

“That doesn’t even apply here!” Anne said.

“Doesn’t it, Anne? Doesn’t it?

I took 37 steps to get back to my office. 37. In a row.

59 thoughts on “Tomorrow, I go back to Eureka”

  1. well played on the Clerks reference Wil, you actually made me lol in the library! Can’t wait for the new season of Eureka also, as my wife’s a big fan of the show.

  2. The out-of-left-field Clerks reference was the best part. Really made me laugh out loud, and I didn’t even like the original Clerks that much.

  3. Haha, weird I just watched Clerks and Clerks: The Animated Series last night. Enjoyed the rest of the post as well. I can’t wait for Eureka 4.5 to come out on DVD so I can catch up on it already!

  4. “From a lizard to a bird in about 40 minutes,” I said. “Suck on that, evolution.”
    “I looked at the cat. ‘Try not to suck any dicks in the parking lot on your way out.'”
    Oh, it totally applies! More bwahahahaa!
    “I took 37 steps to get back to my office. 37. In a row.”
    And you, sir, win the internet for today. Well done.

  5. I can’t wait for Eureka to come back… I keep staring at its wee icon in xbmc, wishing and hoping…
    And I love love LOVE that Clerks quote. I use it all the damned time. ^_^

  6. Brother! I know you probably won’t have the time to visit whilst in cAnAdA (funny joke there), but at least you’ll be enjoying the same spring weather we are. About 40, cold, and rain/snowy.

  7. I’m going to be the weirdo here and wonder “aloud” what kind of lizard it was. Living in the wet and cold Pacific NW we do not get many wild reptiles. Garter snakes, some pond turtles that you can only find on sunny days, and I think we have some skinks of some kind. I had no idea there were little lizardy critters in LA! Crazy!

  8. Well at least alligator lizards can fight back a little. I do recall one latching onto on our of cats paws many years ago…sad to think his ancestors may have been something like T-Rex. :)
    Oh, and BTW…the market for original Gameboys is really booming right now. I frequently sell video game odds and ends online – but always used to pass when I saw those familiar white bricks for 4 or 5 bucks in our local thrift stores. After people started paying $40 for working ones I realized that nostalgia will never die. No backlight, wonky green and black screen…but that won’t stop some folks.
    Then again this is coming from a guy who has a Tandy Color Computer in his living room. ^_^

  9. Many Eureka fans are kinda (!) pissed at the delay in the broadcast of Eureka whilst the “SighFee” channel gets less and less Sci-Fi by the moment.
    Oh, and Vancouver, is warm even though it’s like this: (very SFW)

  10. From Wikipedia (emphasis mine):
    The lizards can frequently be found near human habitation and are notable for their fearless self-defense; they will often bite and defecate if handled.
    Your cat is far braver than I…

  11. These are the types of posts I really like.
    Sorry but my eyes glaze over when you talk about D&D. But I’m sure other people are the same way when you talk about poker 😉 LOL
    BTW – Do you have an updated appearance schedule for 2011?

  12. Oh man. I think I will tweet this posting to Kevin Smith. I think he’ll get a kick out of it. Great story. I had a dog that liked to bring us “presents”. It once brought us a squirrel that was still alive and sqeaking. I was only four so that was a rather tramatizing experience since all cute and furry critters were close to my heart. I actually had a hard time loving and petting my dog after that. I didn’t understand the animal kingdom that much obviously.

  13. I went back into my office and looked around for the other things I’d usually take with me on a trip: games, books, maybe a couple of DVDs … and I realized that everything I needed or wanted (there’s a difference, kids, and it’s important to know it) was already there, on my Kindle and my iPad.
    BTW, that “a-ha” moment a Really Big Deal ™. I’m not just talking about that awesome band, either. I have giant stacks of books that need to be bar-code scanned and converted… but part of me is going to miss my kid not having that stuff.
    Worth a post on that as a content creator, would love to read your thoughts on that one.
    Take care,
    -Will with two Ls.

  14. Heh. It’s in the 40’s and raining here on the East Coast too. Welcome to Spring in the Northern Climbs. Watch out for snow…
    Must meet this Anne. She’s obviously a saint.

  15. Damn. Ive lost count of the amount of similar conversations Ive had with my cat about the odd lizard or bird. I’ve also had to chase/escort several birds out of the house, and even got one to hop on a fish net handle (from dads fish tank) and stay there til I carried him out.
    We keep telling our cats not to bring her friends in to play, but she won’t listen.
    Have fun in Vancouver.

  16. I liked the original “Clerks.” IMHO – one of Kevin Smith’s few moments of genius. Most of his other stuff is a little lazy if you ask me. The ONLY thing I did not like about Clerks is that the retorts came too fast…kind of like…er…should I dare say it? Murphy Brown. Jesus – I can’t believe I just compared the two. It’s like comparing TNG (Season 4) to DS9 or Hot Apple Pie A La Mode to a piece of shit.

  17. I always remember the cat we had when I was a kid. She would torture the field mice she caught. She would throw them up in the air and then pretend she didn’t see where they landed. Then as soon as they tried to make a run for it she would pounce on them and throw them up in the air again. (rinse and repeat).

  18. I didn’t realize you were still in acting until I caught your appearance on ‘Big Bang’. Thank you for maintaining this blog, and sharing your journey with fans. :)

  19. Your post reminds me of the times I had a bird or mouse invade our house when I was growing up. It also reminds me how I don’t have pets now and miss them but don’t know if I have the patience or money to have some though my children would love them.
    It’s also been frustrating waiting the for Eureka to begin again. I don’t know why that show has such a long break between airings. It is very frustrating. When is the d*mn*d date anyway?

  20. “From a lizard to a bird in about 40 minutes,” I said. “Suck on that, evolution.”
    That wasn’t just funny in your head Wil, had me just about tearing up I was laughing so hard.
    On a side note about living in The Future™, what’s your favorite, must-have iPad app (not including social networking tools)?

  21. Plants vs. Zombies is my favorite iPad game, Penultimate is my favorite doodle thing, the Kindle app is pretty swell, and Dropbox is slick.

  22. Ok, so 2 things:
    1 – gonna have to check those out, although I’ve played PvZ for PC and know I already love that =)
    2 – WIL TALKED TO ME! I’m the luckiest girl in the worl— wait….guy, luckiest GUY in the world *shifts around uncomfortably*
    *ahem* So, how bout them Dodgers? =)

  23. The Kindle battery lasts longer, and is easier to read in bright light. It's also easier on my eyes for extended periods of time, and is smaller and lighter than an iPad. Most importantly, though, it doesn't tempt me with games when I should be reading!

  24. Gotta say I know what you mean about packing the things you need to keep yourself entertained while traveling. Thankfully technology is getting smaller and more lightwieght all the time.
    On the plus side I still have my original Nintendo Game Boy and the rechargable battery pack, but I’m not sot sure what happened to the clip on light and magnifiying glass..

  25. Several people have complained about the glare. Given that it’s supposed to be a great tool for reading (books, eMags, blogs, etc.), you’d think there’d be an app for that.
    (oh, and the sun should return for Thurs and Fri in Vancouver… boots… get some nice waterproof boots… none of those huge rubbers that they made us wear when we we kids, but stylish yet practical ones, maybe from Mark’s Work Wearhouse – not a promotion just first place that comes to mind for such a thing)

  26. You know, it’s pathetic that people don’t go out for things in LA, like you said on a recent blog… it’s hard to get a good turnout. The weather is awesome. Why stay home? It’s 40 degrees, randomly sleety, windy, nasty, grey and ugly. In Michigan, and maybe Vancouver too. That’s an excuse to stay home. Is it spring yet?

  27. Wil – I saw a Facebook post that you tweeted about the TSA causing you some unpleasantness.
    If you are serious about doing something, please consider joining Facebook Group “We Won’t Fly” or send me an email (I assume you have access, if not just post back to this and can figure out a contact method) to find out the current gameplan for fighting back against the TSA. A good point of general information is which has been front and center on this issue.
    Quite frankly, it would help for celebrities to get onboard, especially as they are subject to TSA abuses and LAX is one of the more obnoxious airports. In addition to violating rights of American citizens, people with medical issues are singled out 100% of the time by the TSA.
    For example, you can Google “Sharon Cissna” to find out the ‘wonderful’ breast cancer victim story she experienced. Another wonderful story about expansion of the TSA is to google “TSA Savannah Georgia Amtrak” and see the video which caused the Amtrak Chief of Police John O’Connor to kick the TSA out of Amtrak properties a few weeks ago.
    Wil, we are very serious about fighting these abuses, and you are in a position to fight back and potentially enlist actors and other celebrities should you choose to stand up for your rights.
    I would look forward to giving you more background and explaining some next steps under consideration.
    Best regards,
    (I also own a Kindle, iPOD, and iPad….if it helps you make a decision to assist)

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