This is a real thing that you can own

About a year ago, I dared my friend Joel to imagine what it would be like if he designed a little plushie Wil Wheaton, and this happened:

image from

After we stopped laughing about it, and enjoying how oh-so-clever we were, we started thinking about actually making it a real thing that someone could own, mostly because the idea of letting my dog murderize one was really funny to me. Then Joel pointed out that if we made it, we could give little Wil some minature dice, and someone would probably make a little clown sweater for him to wear… 

I know, right? This was long before we even thought about dressing him up as Sparks McGee!

It took a long time and a lot of work, but it's finally happening. Little Plushie Wil Wheaton looks like this:


Which came first? The Internet or Wil Wheaton? No one knows for sure, but rest assured top men are working on the answer. TOP. MEN. Since the actual Wil Wheaton lives inside the Internet, you can't actually possess him. OR CAN YOU!? You can't, but you can own your very own soft, diminutive effigy of Wil that may or may not be a horcrux containing a tiny piece of his soul. I'm just saying, give your Li'l Wil a hug and I bet somewhere in California the real one lets out an audible sigh of contentment. Set it on fire and… well, you paid your money. Do what you want.

You can pre-order one of these little guys right now. Seriously, get together twenty of your internet space bucks, and go to the Hijinks Ensue store, for great justice.

Because Pinchy would have wanted it that way.

Wheaton Prime with Plushie Wheaton

Seriously. How cute is this?

58 thoughts on “This is a real thing that you can own”

  1. I don’t think so. It probably has a web cam or something and speakers so it can spy on me. No way am I letting that thing in my house. So it can terrorize the cat? Watch me while I sleep? Steal food from the cupboards? Who left that dice on the floor?
    Nice try, Wheaton. (Fry squint)

  2. will it cure my son’s fear of dogs? does it glow in the dark? will there be peace on earth? can it bring back firefly? what’s that smell? oh crap! something’s burning!

  3. Will you have the prototype Li’l Wil with you at Polaris? Because I may have something for him that would amuse 12-year-old you. (Not as awesome as a shirt or sweater, but still…)

  4. THIS needs to be the new doll in the USPS commercials instead of the evil clown. The one where it mysteriously moves closer to the family- yeah, that’s the one. Mini-Wil would be perfect.

  5. As long as he doesn’t fake pee when I let him drink beer, close his eyes when I put him to bed, or stare at me while I sleep (yeah, i know I just contradicted myself), put me down for one!

  6. Ok, I definitely want one…. But chances are it will be chewed on by my 6 month old at some point. Any chance it can double as a Baby chew toy without suffering any long term damage (to either the doll or your pride)?

  7. Ohhh Wil…. Clearly you’ll need a Fawkes outfit for him so you and Felicia can have Guild themed play time with your plushies of yourselves.

  8. My wife says I can’t buy a plushie Wil Wheaton, but she bought a Misha Collins blanket, so… actually a Felicia Day… um. Hmm. That might not fly, either. ≀ checks prices for ST action figures β‰₯

  9. “Do you wanna date my avatar…”  I agree, Lil’Wil needs a Fawkes outfit so Wil & Felicia, when she gets her own plushie, can play together.  (Anne willing, of course!)
    Big question: What will be there given what one doesn’t wear beneath the kilt?

  10. I’m not going to buy one, because I have too much stuff sitting around my house as it is, but…that’s terribly funny. If you give one to you dog, PLEASE post a video online of the mayhem that might ensue.

  11. Hrmm. Wil – I’m not sure if it’s specific to Joel’s site, or his ad providers, or what, but I got a nasty “You’ve won an awesome prize!” popup when I surfed to HiJinksEnsue with my Android phone. No way to dismiss it either, without being sucked into the spammy contest site. Specifically, I noticed it when I went to view the comic he made about your reaction to the Kings winning the cup (which was awesome, btw).
    Regarding plushie Wil – adorable! :)

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