texts from wife

  • Anne: The weather guy just said there’s a 70% chance of rain tomorrow.
  • Me: I just checked Weather Underground, Weather.com, and the Weather Channel. They all say 79° and sunny.
  • Anne: Yeah, I just checked that too. I think he made a mistake.
  • Me: I think he’s the worst weather guy ever.
  • Anne: I think he’s confused.
  • Me: Yell at the TV that he’s a stupid dummy.
  • Anne:
  • Me: He won’t hear you, but he’ll know.

12 thoughts on “texts from wife”

  1. As one of those weather guys on the Weather Channel, I’m glad we look to be on the “correct” side of the forecast this time (especially since I’m out here for BlizzCon)! That being said, I will admit to my share of blown forecasts in my career – meteorology is still an imperfect science.

    Looking forward to seeing the new ep of BBT!

    1. That’s because meteorology is the act of PREDICTING THE FUTURE!

      If it reached the level of being a perfect science, all Meteorologists would effectively be wizards.

  2. OK, dig it, I’ve been meaning to send you something of an apology and some thank yous for a while now, I see no other way to write you other than to post, so I chose this Random Post of Randomness to do it (rather than muck up your anniversary post– congratulations!– or your musings on acting). Here goes:

    Back in 2008, 4 months to the day before it closed, my wonderful husband gave me my Trek Costumer Nerd Dream Wedding, on the bridge of the Enterprise-D at The Experience in Las Vegas. I made all the costumes for our wedding party; Marge Simpson would be proud of my sewing calluses. I was/am Klingon, as was my Maid of Honor (gave a whole new meaning to the term; her job was to hold my bat’leth and glare at the guests like “Object– I DARE YOU!”), and my husband was/is a Vulcan, as was his best man. The first part of our ceremony was “The Joining of Two Klingon Hearts” (from Worf and Dax’s wedding), delivered by my Shakespearean actor best friend, everyone came in costume as something either Trek or SciFi (one guest came as Barf The Mawg!), and we had our reception downstairs in Quark’s, where both the tourists and employees gawked at us in wonder. Happiest day of my nerdgirl life.
    So anyway, I had been carrying on an e-mail exchange for some time with Scott Tipton, author of the great “Comics101″ site as well as some great new Trek comics, and I told him about the wedding. He wanted to see photos, and we wanted to meet, so I promised to come to the “Star Trek Comics” panel he was part of at SDCC to show him. I had NO idea until I got there that you were part of the panel too, until I yelled “TIPTOOOON! YOU ROCK!”, gave him the DIO Horns and the Simmons Tongue in support, and saw you sitting next to him, looking at me like I was quite mad (I’m used to it). The panel was great, fun time had by all, and afterwards, I wandered up to the dais to show him my li’l photo album, beaming proudly “Dude! I showed them to Rod, and he pronounced it THE Trekkest Wedding EVER! It has been decreed by The Great Hatchling, therefore It Is So!” And I handed the book over to him, noticing that you were kindasorta trying to see them, and I thought “Should I show them to him, too? What if he actually doesn’t care and is utterly sick of All Things Trek? Do you REALLY wanna be THAT FAN? Besides, who wants to see a stranger’s wedding pics? You’re lame, leave him alone”. So I did. I listened to that big fat liar Depression and his stanky co-hort Anxiety and made it a point not to bother you. Years pass, I follow your writings online and your journey/struggles with our particular brand of sad and awkward, and I thought “Oh, dude, he’s actually supercool, he probably wanted to just glance at them and you made him think you’re some kinda rudeass Wesley Hater or some junk. NICE.” So, I apologize if I was rude, and now greatly regret not having shown you; I am retired from SDCC, after 25 years in a row, and will probably never run into you again, but if I do, I’ll bring them.

    Now to the thank-yous:

    Thank you for your honestly, bravery, and candor regarding mental illness. I’ve struggled with it for decades now, and just as I was hitting bottom again a few months ago, I re-found this blog/site and wow… at the risk of being a creeper, it was like you were talking right to me, telling me there’s no shame in admitting you’re losing your shit and need some help to get it back together, and how awesome it will be when I do. It helps to be married to a patient Vulcan, but it was/is time to get my life back and be The Fierce Klingon Broad again. Thank you.

    Thank you for your post about what a drag it was that ST:TE closed, because you can testify to all and sundry that that set was a damn near perfect recreation and was eerily like coming home; to read that from you, who knew the set so well, somehow makes my wedding even more special to me. Thank you for that.

    And thank you for one of the strangest movie recommendations I’ve ever recieved. Again, this was at SDCC (CCI my big Irish arse!), I’m not sure which year (Kids, don’t smoke the dope), ’99 maybe? I’m standing at this Big Booth O’ Gloriously Bad/Trashy Films (don’t think it was the Troma Booth itself, though Troma was WELL represented) decked out in my Klingon drag, and I notice THE CRAZIEST MOVIE TITLE EVER on the table before me. “‘KILLER CONDOM’?!” I wondered aloud to no one in particular, only to hear a strangely familiar voice laugh and say “HA! YES! Killer Condom– it’s the rubber that rrrrubs you out!!” I laugh and turn and sweet mother of Bowie, it’s frickin’ Wil Wheaton! We both gave each other a bit of a double-take, and I was so chuffed (as the Brits say) to be meeting you, all I could do was blurt out “Oh wow, hi! I gotta say, I’ve loved you since ‘Stand By Me’, you’ve grown into a fine figure of a man, and I’m terribly proud of you (like I’m WAY older than you, jeez, only two years).” You smiled somewhat quizzically and said “Well… thank you. I’m not kidding, though, buy ‘Killer Condom’, that shit is COMEDY.” So I did, and you were right… thank you for that, too. (If I had thought of this BEFORE the whole wedding photo thing, I would’ve remembered that you were My Kinda Weirdo ;)

    Most of all, thank you for reading this (if you haven’t done the tl;dr thing yet), and for spreading the word about Dealing With The Wacky and the glory of Not Being A Dick. You rock with a hardness that makes King Diamond jealous. Please, never stop.

    I’ll go away now, but I’ll be back– BACK WITH NUCLEAR WEAPONS!

    Your Pal,

    Storm

    1. This (^^) is EXACTLY what I was thinking when I read this post. I just clicked through from Feedly to make sure that SOMEBODY put up a reference to Steve Martin “predicting” LA’s “weather.” Ha! Like you guys have weather. ::eye roll::

  3. That is exactly how I’ve explained to my wife why I yell at the screen during hockey games. The Canucks may not be able to hear me but they know they’ve done wrong. Especially as I am a goalie so I can use the telepathic goaltender circuits to really get my message through.

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