Last year, a couple of weeks before Halloween, I had this idea to write a short, supernatural horror story. At the time, I was deep in the first draft of the short story that became a novella that really wants to be a novel (which has since been titled “All We Ever Wanted Was Everything”), so switching tracks to work on something different was intended to be a quick detour that would give me something to release for Halloween. WELP. That short story ended up being about 14000 words, which I guess is called a Novelette. Novelette sounds less cool than both short story and novella, but I don’t make the rules, Dottie, I just break them.
My understanding of the publishing business leads me to believe this length falls into a weird place, so rather than try to find a home for it in the traditional publishing world, I’m just going to publish it myself, today. Seriously. There are links to buy it at the end of this post.
Dead Trees Give No Shelter is about Jay Turner, a broken and lonely man who has been adrift since his brother’s murder when they were children. Now, after twenty years away, Jay has come back to his hometown of Garron, Ohio, to uncover the truth about his brother’s death.
Here’s an excerpt:
12:21 a.m. October 16, 2014
Kenneth Blake strained his eyes, looking past his own reflection toward the room of witnesses on the other side of the one-way glass. He hoped that Jay Turner was in that room, hoped that Jay was there to hear him speak one last time.
Walter Davis looked at the phone on the wall. It had rung only once in the twenty-six years he’d been warden, and it would not ring tonight. Kenneth Blake was as guilty as any prisoner who had been strapped to that gurney, and no governor – reelection campaign or not – was going to pardon a child killer. He checked his watch against the digital clock on the wall above the phone. It was time.
“Mister Blake, it is my duty, under the laws of the great state of Ohio, to carry out your execution. It is it your right, under those same laws, to make a statement if you wish.”
Kenneth nodded his head at Warden Davis. He bore him no ill will. The warden was just doing his job, playing his part in the complex machinery of what passed for justice in twenty-first-century America. That Kenneth was, in truth, innocent of the murder of little Charlie Turner, twenty years earlier almost to the day, was of no account now.
He tried to coax some spit out of his mouth, failed, and licked his lips with a dry tongue.
“I just wanna say that I forgive you, warden. I forgive you and the judge, and the prosecutor, because you think you know the truth but you don’t. Mister Turner, if you’re out there, I want to say to you that I’m sorry I couldn’t save your little brother. I done my best, though, and I’m sorry I failed you.”
Warden Davis stood next to the gurney, hands clasped in front of his belt, stoic.
“Mister Blake, may G –”
“But you know I didn’t hurt that boy, because you was there and you saw it all. I know –”
“Mister Blake!” Davis snapped. He took no joy in this duty, but he would be dammed if he’d let this child killer taunt the victim’s surviving brother.
Kenneth continued to speak over him. “I know they made you think you saw something you know you didn’t see, but I know that you know what the truth is. And I know it’s callin’ you the way it called me, but you can’t go back there to them woods, Mister Turner. If you go back there it’s gonna get you, too, just like it got your brother. You gotta break the cycle.”
The Warden looked at the phone one final time, waited, then nodded to his men.
With mechanical efficiency, they moved as one: a button was pressed to recline the gurney, the needles in Blake’s left arm were checked one last time, a black sackcloth was draped over his head.
Kenneth, resigned to his fate from the moment he held Charlie Turner’s lifeless body two decades ago, nevertheless felt cold pangs of fear as the sack blocked out his vision and muffled the sounds around him. He heard the warden speak, and then sodium thiopental pushed him into unconsciousness, before pancuronium bromide and potassium chloride pushed the life out of his body.
When it was done and the other witnesses had left, Warden Davis met privately with Jay Turner. “I wanted to apologize for how Blake used his last words,” he said. “I can assure you that he did not know you were a witness.”
Jay nodded. “I appreciate that, Warden.”
“If you don’t mind my asking,” Davis said, “what was he talking about?”
Jay sighed. “I don’t know, sir. That’s not really a night that I like to think about, if I can help it.”
“Of course. I’m sorry for asking.”
“There’s no need to apologize. It isn’t the first time he’s said those things, but I’m kind of relieved it’s the last time I’ll hear them.”
Jay didn’t tell him about the nightmares. After all, they were just dreams; they weren’t real. For twenty years, he had reminded himself: they’re just dreams. They aren’t real.
I’m offering this story in both ePub and mobi formats, DRM-free, for $5. If I set everything up correctly, you should be able to download the format of your choice as fast as you can click your mouse.
Because it’s a FAQ: to put the mobi file on your Kindle, you can email it to your Kindle as a personal document, or connect your Kindle via USB to your computer and drag it like you would any other file to any other device. I’m not sure how ePub works for all devices, so you’ll have to check with the manufacturer of yours for specific instructions.
(Please note that I am a total noob with Woo Commerce, and I have no idea how to configure it so that it doesn’t ask you for an address and phone number. Feel free to put fake information into those fields, until I can solve that issue.)
Nice, Wil – I am looking forward to reading it, once the issue with the checkout page is resolved!
Thank you! I think I fixed it.
Yep, you did – just ordered it! 🙂
I normally read comedies, autobiography and sci fi. Rarely horror or similar styles. Today. Literally today I said I wanted to read American Psycho and said I wanted to get into more “supernatural” and scarier stories. Thanks Wil! I have $5 for you.
Grabbed it! Thanks, Wil! I’ve been looking forward to this.
Obviously, I will buy this story. But which format will work best on my Kindle?
MOBI format is specifically designed for Kindle.
Thank you! Paid for and downloaded!!!
Hooray!! I hope you enjoy it.
I’m glad this question was asked and answered. I was just about to ask.
Hi Wil I bought it with PayPal for mobi. How do I load it to my kindle? Looking forward to reading it!
You can email it to your kindle as a personal document, or you can connect your Kindle to your computer with a USB cable, mount it as a storage device, and add it that way.
I opened the email with the download link on the kindle and it just downloaded directly onto the device that way. Works fine.
Downloaded and works fine as an ePub on my Nook 🙂
I was hoping someone would say what format worked on a Nook. Thanks!
Google is your very knowledgeable friend! I did a Google search for “what format works on a Nook” and got back “ePub”.
Basically, ePub is for every kind of eReader except for Kindles, which use the mobi format. Because Amazon is weird and proprietary sometimes.
Hi Wil,
Congratulations on the birth of your newest creative “child”!
Anything worth making is a challenge to complete, and I respect the hell out of you for finishing this story and putting it out into the world. Much respect.
These days my reading time is pretty limited unless it’s an audiobook. If you happen to record it, that would be amazing. Totally understandable if you’re ready to move on, though.
Awesome! Looking forward to reading it! Can you write a post on how to self-publish?
I’m pretty sure there’s some self-publishing posts in the archives. Look around 2004, I think? But I’ll write a post about the experience with this release when I have some data next week.
Hi Wil. Just picked up the ePub and looking forward to diving in. Do you think you will ever consider a run of physical copies? I love all of your work that I have consumed and would really enjoy having this in a physical copy as well.
I’ll look into it, but if input it into print, it’ll probably be part of a collection.
That would make sense. Thank you for even considering it. Keep creating!
I’m confused you wonderful, prolific sonofagun. Is this ‘Ravenswood’ or is that ‘All they ever wanted was everything’? Is ‘ravenswood’ a third thing? Have I just confused myself terribly and am now making things up? Anyway… Thanks for writing! Planning on grabbing this whenever I get back to my PC.
This is Ravenswood, with a new title.
Thanks!
Ciao Wil.
Ho letto l’estratto che hai pubblicato e mi è piaciuto molto. Purtroppo ho dovuto leggerlo nella traduzione di Google, perché non conosco l’inglese.
Potresti pensare di farlo tradurre in italiano? Conosci qualcuno che potrebbe farlo? Te ne sarei molto grata.
Resto in attesa di buone notizie 😄
Saluti a Anne.
Annalisa
Io non lo so per certo, perche non sono Wil, ma probablimente non.
Please think also about posting it as an audiobook. I’d download immediately!
For any of the devices I highly recommend calibre. It’ll help you get it onto pretty much anything from one format to another. Handles conversions, etc. I’ve used it for years to convert between various formats or get it pushed onto devices without having to worry too much.
http://www.calibre-ebook.com/
Total agreement. Calibre is a great program and one of the first things I added to my computer after getting a Kindle. (There is some sort of weird issue with emailing to my kindle from calibre, but a direct connection works just fine so, eh, no biggie)
Anyhow, Calibre is really easy to use, converts files in a snap and makes any e-reader instantly better and more useful.
There’s some setup under the send books by email entry plus you have to authorize the address on Amazon’s site to allow it to send. Takes a bit of setup, but works perfectly when you fix it.
Looks good, and I had no trouble ordering. I look forward to reading it!
I have ordered it and paid via paypal but no place for download, no email message… How do I get it?
I like the (earlier/previous) nod to Bauhaus… 😉
Bought it. Read it immediately in one seating. Liked it very much. Good flow, characters, setting, and pace (though the ending felt a bit rushed to me).
It’s like a cross between your “The Monster in my Closet” and Stephen King’s “IT”.
Thank you for publishing it. As always, I’m looking forward to more of your writing (and always keeping the hope alive that, someday, maybe, there’ll be a follow up to “Memories of the Future”).
Also, I’m not sure if you’re interested, but I’ve noted down to myself a few typos I’ve noticed (MOBI version):
Chapter 2: “If they could keep it together though high school” (i.e. “though” –> “through”)
Chapter 9: Greg’s “taking care of you for two years” is replied to with “Wow, a whole year!”
Chapter 10: “She was in aflannel nightgown” (i.e. “aflannel” –> “a flannel”)
(also, not a typo, but there’s a very jarring transition in chapter 7 from Greg’s POV to Jay’s, without any visual indication, e.g. a paragraph break).
Thanks again!
RE: “the ending felt a bit rushed to me” I have noticed that about a lot of published mystery books [in quite popular series], but I tell myself, “well, a climax is a climax, what else would I have wanted to happen?” I guess it is sort of akin to what one is looking for being in the last place you looked — i.e., no more to the story of the search 🙂
ARRRRRRRGH. (And now you know the sound an editor makes when he misses several errors he should have caught.)
Purchasing this now. I’m not a big fan of horror, but the intro got my intrigued enough to give this a shot! Good job!
In a different twist… maybe the audiobook should be read by John Scalzi, Ernest Cline, David Kushner and R.A. Salvatore
I would love to see (and purchase) a paper copy. eBooks just aren’t sexy any more. You can’t sniff the pages. Somehow, smelling my grubby fingerprints on the screen of my device just isn’t the same. As a recommendation, Amazon has a wonderful print-on-demand service. I would gladly pay $10-15 for a paper copy.
You’re not alone. I’ll look into it and see if I can make the economics of the thing work.
“Dear Mr. Wheaton,
I would like to sniff your story. Please think about releasing it as a physical book.”
That should probably sound kind of weird, but as a librarian and former bookseller, that sounds totally normal to me. (I also prefer physical books.)
Ok. So I paid with PayPal, but I don’t have a download. Did I do something wrong? Anyone else have an issue?
I also bought via paypal, on the 2nd–I have a download link but it’s invalid. Trying to figure out how to read this without buying again if possible.
Same problem, but I can’t get a response.
Thanks Will! I just downloaded it and I’m looking forward to reading it soon.
I just finished the audible version of the Collapsing Empire. I’d love a version of Dead Trees in audio format.
Hi Wil. I paid via PayPal, but am unable to download the epub. Help?
What’s the specific problem with your download? I’ll try to help.
Hi Wil. I got it figured out. There was an email with instructions to log into wilwheaton.net. Once I did that, the download link worked. Love your writing! Cheers!
Hi Wil, I have the same problem as Jim Ebbitt. I’m not getting a download link, after payment.
I think you get it in an email? Some people are reporting that the email ends up in their junk folder.
I didn’t get an email, and there’s nothing in the junk mail. Do you know which mail servers are used to send these mails?
Hi Peter, I don’t see your order in the system, so maybe it didn’t process? email me a copy of your receipt (wil at wil wheaton dot net) and I’ll see what I can do. Sorry for the troubles.
I did get a receipt from Paypal, so it should have processed. I’ve sent you a mail with the receipt. Thanks.
Problem solved. Thanks for the help!
Hooray!! I know how to fix the problem you had if other people have it, so thanks for that!
Thanks for putting this online Wil! I bought a copy (and as per my delivery instructions, the bits were indeed delivered to the side door). I’ll read it as soon as I can!
Just downloaded it there and didn’t get a download link. But I’ve checked my junk mail and the email was there with the link in it. So anyone who’s not got an email maybe check your junk mail folder?
BTW I’m a huge scaredy cat. Hopefully this isn’t TOO scary!!! 🙂 Looking forward to reading it though.
Dammit, my wallet is all the way upstairs and I just finished a 5k Zombies, Run! run (the second training mission before the Spring Virtual Race), so my knees will complain – but tomorrow morning, it will be mine!
Which gives me time to ask, what’s the best format for adding to a Google Play library/reading on Android? I think my tablet has a Kindle app, but I try to avoid proprietary formats as much as possible.
I really really liked this. Creepy and compelling.
Wil, would you consider being your own audiobook narrator if/when an audiobook version comes out?
Made it through Ch3 so far – a few autobiographical things in there – cool!
A quote from High Fidelity about organizing records comes to mind, but it’s too damned late for quoting Cusack and I’m too damned tired 😉 Business trip today. One of those “Get up while it’s dark and start traveling and by the time you get where you’re going it’s dark again. Days like today make me wish for teleporters.
I’ll read it from the beginning tomorrow as my retention right now is probably nil.
Anyway – Groovy! Glad you published it.
I don’t even know if you’ll see this this late after the post, but I finally got it working this morning! I will be reading it tonight! Thanks for making awesome things and sharing it with us! 🙂
Hello, been looking forward to reading this. Ordered it and used paypal to pay. Haven’t received my copy yet. Checked in the junk folder and didn’t find the email with the link.
Hey Aubrey! Email me your order number (It should start with WC:) and I’ll look you up in the system. We’ll get you sorted out.
Hey congrats on getting your story out there! I love horror, so I’m pretty psyched to read it. I find it really interesting that the excerpt you posted is a basically a political argument against the death penalty. Was that deliberate, or is just one of those subconscious themes that writers insert without realizing it? Or you know, I could just read it and not analyze it (in writing anyway).
Either way, it looks amazing!
All fiction can work on multiple levels, and if we do it right, we let the readers choose which level they want to experience, or how many levels they want to experience.
I don’t know if I succeeded in this case.
Having had read it all the way through, I’d say you did a pretty good job. I’d also say that the theme of “justice” (among many others) is a lot stronger than “anti-death penalty”.
Possible spoiler warning
Your story is good. It’s well told and I like the structure.
First thing: you flip back and forth through time, but the switch isn’t always indicated in the chapter headings, it’s mildly confusing.
Second thing: you have a narrative style that likes to be evocative. It’s a very poetic kind of prose and I’d respectfully recommend you spend some time reading Oscar Wilde. Your writing is good, and you have a lot of creative imagery, and feel like his kind of writing is where yours really wants to go.
Last thing: believe it or not, my sister died when I was six and she was three, from an intestinal birth defect that is incredibly difficult to detect. Basically her intestinal tract failed, she developed gangrene internally, and one morning she woke up and threw up until she choked to death on her own vomit. She’d died of suffocation before the ambulance arrived. Anyway, my mother fell into an intense depression, and completely checked out mentally, and by the time I was seven she was gone physically as well. My father (who – seriously – is this guy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIYUIXiQYsA) wasn’t at all good at being a single dad, and decided to send me into foster care when I was around 12, because he said looking after me was too much trouble. I had barely seen my mother between the ages of about seven and eleven, but at this point, she had remarried (to a younger man actually) and having a new baby had helped her sort herself out a bit. Her mother and sisters basically shamed her into taking me instead of letting my father send me into care, and so I lived with her until I moved out at like 17 or 18. I honestly had a horrible relationship with her until I had a child of my own, and was able to be more understanding of how hard things had been for her.
So, you can call bullshit on my story if you want to, most people do and that’s alright (I guess my life story hits too many drama points or something). My point here is not wanting sympathy (I can’t tell you how much I don’t care), but to give you context for when I tell you that the characterization of your main character needs some polishing. A lot of what you wrote is excellent, it really, really is, but he just lacks anger, and stoicism and he carries too much guilt. And kids are resilient and tough, and the more you throw at them, the tougher they are. Your Jay (especially teenage Jay) is just too soft, he cries too much. Kids like us don’t cry much Wil, not even when we’re all grown up. I realize that different people are different and whatever, and yes that’s totally fair, but I also think that if you want to write effectively about a trauma that you’ve never experienced you could benefit from more researching.
BUT! It is really good story. I wouldn’t bother to say anything at all if I didn’t think it was. And for what it’s worth, I liked the ending, and I thought it flowed organically from the narrative. It actually reminded me a lot of the lottery, or even Stephen King’s Rainy Season.
end spoilers
Stephanie, sorry to hear about your sister & the rough journey you’ve had since her death. As someone who has also lost a sibling, I wanted to give my perspective.
In the story, Greg tells Jay something along the lines of “people deal with sadness in their own way” and I think you may have missed that point when you criticized Wil’s characterization of Jay. Please don’t be upset, this is just my opinion.
You were 6 when your sister died, right? I was 12 when my brother died. I had 2 sisters, who were 8 and 4 at the time. Due the differences in our ages, we processed the event differently. Even as adults. I’m much more emotional about it than they are, as I was emotionally more mature at the time and had a clear understanding of what happened. In the story, Jay is 13 or 14, if I remember correctly, when Charlie dies, very close to the age I was when my brother died. I don’t think Jay “cried too much” and in fact, based on my understanding of the story, he hadn’t really processed the death completely until 20 years later and yes, he did cry at several points in the story at that time. It’s true that children are resilient, but it’s also important to recognize differences in emotional maturity/understanding. Large differences between 6 years old and 14 or so, as far as that goes.
But, to me, the most important difference here is the circumstances of the death. Without revealing spoilers, since you’ve read the story, I can be vague here. But Charlie’s death was, to say the least, an event that can’t easily be translated into our world. Meaning, the reactions can’t really be compared 1:1, although naturally they do have parallels.
My mother withdrew for months, and in some ways 33 years later still hasn’t emerged completely. A year after my brother’s death, she gave birth to my baby brother, who is now 32 years old. Even decades later my family has never really mended & it’s something I carry with me each day. And yes, I cried on what would have been my brother’s 30th birthday in 2014, as I thought of what might have been. I wonder, did I cry too much?
Anyway, just wanted to give another perspective.
Hi Jeffrey, I am very sorry for your loss as well. I appreciate you telling your story. I recognize so much of it from my own. You’re right about a lot of what you’re saying about loss and age. I remember being upset at my sister’s funeral because her coffin was surrounded by chocolates and big pink balloons and I was so jealous. I remember complaining to my parents that it wasn’t fair that she got them and I didn’t and my father telling me that those were the last chocolates she would ever have. I remember my six year old self trying so hard to process the concept of “last” at an age when forever and next Tuesday are basically synonyms. But I did process it. And I know better than most that last really means last, and forever is a long time. I missed her then and I miss her now. I missed her at my wedding, and when my son was born. I miss her on holidays. I miss her when I watch my son play with his friends when I know she never got old enough. I’m going to be a bridesmaid in my little sister’s wedding this fall, and in my heart there will be a bridesmaid missing, even though one sister was only born because the other died. And I remember her birthdays, too.
So no, you didn’t cry too much.
spoiler alert
But the character that Wil created suffered more than the death of a sibling. When the story opens, his father has already abandoned him, and unlike in my life, there was no tragic catalyst, his father just didn’t want him, and that would have to hurt. His mother is dating a guy who he isn’t all that fond of, and that’s also a tough thing for a kid. Then his brother’s death comes and his mother basically goes catatonic. As adults outside of the story, we can by sympathetic to his mother. But Jay is a child, and that is hims mother and to him this is an absolute abandonment. It’s a mother who you’re worth get out of bed for. A mother who is destroyed by death of one child, but can’t be bothered with the other. It sends the message that you were never very important, that she never really loved you. I don’t quite know how to explain it, but having had lived it, I can tell you that by the time Jay’s mother is sent away, he wouldn’t care. She’d left him two years before, it’s just that her body took awhile to catch up with the rest of her. That is a cataclysmic loss and it’s compounded by the fact that no grandparents step up and his father has disappeared completely. So he’s left with Greg, who clearly doesn’t want to be there.
By the time the story reaches the scene in the Mcdonald’s, Jay his been living like this for two years. Two years of waking up every morning in a world where no one loves you. Two years of going to school with other kids who have families where people care. Two years moving from a point where that idea of family goes from something you mourn, to something you don’t recognize. Imagine Sunday dinners with Jay’s family. Imagine Christmases and Thanksgiving. Imagine birthdays. Do you know how hard birthdays are when no one cares about you? A birthday is when people celebrate the day you came into the world and how happy they are that you’re a part of their lives. Do you know how hard it is to be a kid like that going to school on your birthday? When the other kids say “Happy birthday! What did you get?” So for Jay the internal response would be “What did I get? My father ditched me, my mother’s a zombie, and I’m pretty sure her boyfriend only checks up on me because he’s hoping I ran away from home. Don’t come at me with this happy birthday bullshit.” His external response would be “Oh hey thanks! I didn’t get anything yet, I woke up pretty early this morning.” For extra bonus points, you have the “super excited about birthdays” friends, who can’t believe you didn’t get your presents yet and talk all about how awesome their birthdays are. You might think this would be hurtful, but honestly, after awhile people like this are basically like space aliens. Not only do you get used to living in a world where no one loves you, you start to find it hard to relate to people who don’t. It just Does. Not. Compute.
So yeah, when I say that Jay wouldn’t cry so much, I mean it. So what if Greg leaves? In the first scene with Greg he’s a dick, the second scene he’s pulling the “ditch them in public so they won’t make a scene trick” to tell a kid his mother is being institutionalized and he’s being sent to foster care and the last time we see him he’s paraphrasing Pontius Pilate. This isn’t the kind of guy that would nurture trust and vulnerability in a teenage boy.
I remember my dad telling me he wanted to send me to a foster home. I don’t remember exactly what he said or what I said but I remember thinking “well hey, maybe I’ll go live with someone who actually cares about me.” I don’t remember being hurt by it. At that point I was just kind of resigned. I sure as hell didn’t cry about it. I doubt I still had the capacity.
When you take that many hard hits in life, either you break or you toughen up. Broken people are really broken. A broken Jay would never have made it back to town. He’d be sobbing into his beer about how it was all just too hard. He wouldn’t have rented a car because he’d never get it together enough in life to get a license, never mind a credit card. I’ve known people like that. You can’t help them. The people who toughen up learn that if no one cares about you then you care about yourself. Other people don’t get to make you cry. You don’t let them in like that. You wouldn’t trust them enough to do it. You wouldn’t want to do it. Your pain is your own, your hurting is your own, and when the only thing that belongs to you is yourself, you guard that pretty hard. There was no force on Earth that could have induced me to cry in a Mcdonald’s. And in front of my mom’s boyfriend? Oh hell no. Oh not ever. No one gets to do that to me.
And that scene where he’s in the hospital crying in his mother’s lap about how he wishes she’d come back? I cannot begin to fathom doing something like that. If i were to choose a word to characterize my relationship with my mother, it’d be “distrust.” I wouldn’t cry in front of her. I wouldn’t put my head in her lap. I don’t even want to. The chasm between us is too wide and too deep. To me, this scene in the story is the emotional equivalent of somehow jumping across the grand canyon and saying you could do it because you got a really good running start. People don’t function like that.
I’m sorry for writing you such a long response, and I guess for dumping all this on you, but I felt that your sincerity deserved an honest answer. And because I really really do understand how you feel about your loss. I’d hate for you to think I was policing your grief. I don’t think being hurt makes you weak. And for me there is a real difference between hardness and strength. Callouses are hard, but compassion is strong. You know?
But Wil’s story is a work of fiction. And honestly? Fiction like this is the reason that I have to preface talking about myself with “I know you won’t believe me, but…” It’s the reason that people interrogate me when I talk about my life. People read so much of this stuff and they believe that I should be sobbing and broken. It bothers me because narratives like this perpetuate the idea of the perpetual victim. They have caused me harm. They’ve caused harm to people I care about. Just because we’ve suffered loss, or abuse or abandonment or neglect doesn’t mean we have to be broken drunken messes. It doesn’t mean that I can’t talk about something without crying. I don’t owe to people to be damaged and heartbroken so that I seem more convincing. My life isn’t something I invented just so I could have an interesting back story. I know other people who grew up like I did, and honestly, I find they’re a lot more like Will Riker than they are Wil’s character Jay. I just get tired of people writing things like this without thinking about it, or people reading it and thinking it’s how things really are and then looking at me like I’m the one who’s guilty of inventing bad fiction when I talk about my life.
So yeah, you don’t cry too much at all, but Jay sure does.
Are you making an assumption that Wil didn’t do any research during his writing process? You’ve said that several times, in an effort to support your perspective, but if you’re making a statement like that without facts to support it, that would be unfortunate. I don’t know if he did or not, but I’d definitely ask him before making any sort of declaration about his work.
Now, on to a point that I haven’t discussed but feel it’s extremely relevant in this story. Alcoholism. It’s well established throughout the story that Jay has an issue with alcohol, often binge drinking just so he can sleep. Sadly, if there’s one thing in this world I have experience with it would be alcoholism. My family is littered with people struggling (or have struggled, as several of my family members have died from alcohol abuse/drug abuse) with alcohol. Parents, uncles, aunts, grandparents, you name it. I have lived it.
And I’m going to tell you something Wil captured very well in his story–the emotional aspect of alcohol abuse. You’ve made your thoughts on Jay’s emotions quite clear. But I can tell you this–folks in my family who abuse alcohol are wildly erratic emotionally. They range from violently angry to emotional, crying wrecks and this all depends on how much they’ve had to drink that day, factors in life at that moment that tips them one way or the other, etc.
I won’t even get into the part depression plays in the story. I’ve struggled with depression for most of my adult life. I’ve watched family members around me self-medicate with alcohol or pills due to depression. Jay’s struggle in the story is very familiar to me for many reasons. Jay’s mental health compounded with alcohol abuse can easily cause wild mood swings, including “crying too much”.
Throughout your response you make statements that are puzzling to me, particularly because of the way you use the word “never”. Jay would “never” do this, “never” do that, etc. Truly sad to me. It shows an inflexibility on your part & I hope that softens over time for you.
Also, I’m going to make one more point here, which I made in my previous post. The circumstances around Charlie’s death cannot be ignored. We’re talking about a supernatural event, literally a monster. It’s fiction and the effect it had on Jay cannot be easily translated or labeled in the real world.
It’s obvious to me that you have a lot of anger in your life. It comes through in virtually every word you write. It seems people have doubted you, disregarded you, disrespected you, throughout your life. I’m sorry for that and wish you the best.
Hey Will, I loved the excerpt and went ahead and purchased the ebook. I received a confirmation email with a download link – sounds easy, right? When I clicked the download button I got an error message directing me back to your book store. On my account it says the book was downloaded and the order completed, but I didn’t get to download it. Any help you can give me would be greatly appreciated. I can just let the $5 go, but I really want to read your story!
Michael, please email me your invoice number (it starts with WC:) and I’ll look you up in the system.
Stephanie, there’s an old story about Robert Frost at a poetry reading. A zealous student stands up and says:
“Mr Frost, I love the end of ‘Stopping By the Woodside on a Snowy Evening” where you end the poem with the line… “Miles to go before I sleep, and miles to go before I sleep.” because the protagonist is acknowledging that the night’s journey will be a long one, but also, he has much yet to accomplish in his life.”
Robert Frost smiles and says something to the effect of: “Actually I was just repeating the final words for emphasis — but I’m glad it meant so much to you.”
As RF is gone, we’ll never know if his response was literal or if he was having some fun — and that’s OK, as mystery and imagination are an important part of art, and because ultimately, art is what it is to you. So much of life is rote. Hear this, regurgitate that, put tab A into slot B and twist. The internet has only magnified that, creating an echo chamber where we are repeatedly barraged with soundbytes designed to evoke an emotional response that supports a position. In contrast, art gives our minds a boundless space to explore that is limited only by our own capacity to enjoy it. All of which means that it’s likely more interesting art if we don’t know for sure 😉
Lol, well personally I’d say his response was literal, but just because that’s something I would say. You’re right though, stories are like colours, everyone perceives them differently. And thanks for the anecdote 🙂
BTW: Is it wrong that the phrase “zealous student” called forth an image of some Republican student intern intently combing through the bible in order to find a passage that justifies starving the poor? I guess I must associate zealous with religiosity…
Stephanie, Haha, perhaps. I can definitely picture that. Though it could also be the Democrat student calling that Republican student a ‘monster’ because social conditioning has told her that is OK to do so, though mistakenly referring to a person by a pronoun that they do not favor is anathema.
We have a problem in this country right now, and what makes it such a big problem is that it is not the one we think we have. We have reached the conclusion that politics is a team sport despite centuries of experience that this is a bad idea that ends poorly. Let’s turn it around while we can. Let’s start with words as they are most easily accessible. Reclaim the word ‘zealous’. It is a wonderful word. Also, reclaim the words ‘trigger’, ‘nationalism’, ‘federalism’, ‘diversity’, ‘faith’, ‘inclusiveness’, and ‘inclusion’, and so many others which have been co-opted and stained by small-minded people who have twisted them and tossed them at your generation like so many hand-grenades. I am an atheist, but have been both a Republican and Democrat in my life and I suspect that I’m neither at this point. These past few years have helped me realize what Kalil Gibran meant when he said: “Be not a victim of your times.” The left and right are both hurting our country at this time. The Right seeks to limit our right to act through altering laws, and the left seeks to limit our right to think through altering speech. Both are equally wrong and equally dire, and neither ‘side’ sees any fault in their own way and places all the fault on the other. Hate and mistrust predictably follow despite people having so much in common. We all want love and safety and happiness and health. Divisiveness has infected our speech, our media, our comedy, and our government, and as such, none of it helps us as intended. The only way out of this is to think larger and in so doing, stand above the broken rules of the game that the left and right are desperately hoping we’ll continue to play.
Don’t let people take your words and don’t let people take your actions. Along with your ethics and your love, they are all that you will ever have and all that you can give your children to preserve our way of life in perpetuity which is, at present, more threatened by weaponized ideologies than anything else.
Well, I can agree that there is too much division in the world, but here’s the thing:
A pronoun is the part of speech that is used in place of a noun, specifically a proper noun, or a name. It is not unreasonable for a person to expect to be called by their own name, and it’s really disrespectful to refuse to do otherwise. For instance, Wil Wheaton’s name is actually Richard William Wheaton III, so he should be called Richard but he prefers Wil. I’m sure you can agree that if some jerk came on here and insisted on calling him Ricky, we’d call him out for being a dick, because you understand that the only reason to do that it is to belittle him. So why is it nasty to do that to Wil, but not a big deal to do that to a person who is trans?
See basically, what you’ve said here, is that calling a person out for being grossly disrespectful is equivalent to using someone’s sacred texts to justify stripping funding from meals on wheels, which would almost certainly result in impoverished and isolated seniors starving to death in their own homes.
We can’t heal the world with false equivalency. And though I agree that that the divide is far too broad, I think we may disagree on the nature of that division.
Also, the original zealots were 1st century Jewish terrorists who opposed the Roman occupation of Jerusalem. They felt that any Jewish people who didn’t fight back were collaborators who deserved to be punished. So rather than right the Roman soldiers themselves, they used to go into crowded market places, or rituals at the temple and stab innocent people at random. Given the medical technology of the time, that likely meant a slow death for the victim. A Zealot is weaponized ideology made manifest.
Hey Wil, just bought the story for my Kindle. Super easy process & can’t wait to start reading.
Wow. I ordered this last night (no problems) and read it immediately. I thought it was really well done! If I wanted to option this for a screenplay, should I email you directly or should I send a query to your literary agent?
“Maybe I’ll try for an A.”
“Sorry, mister, I’m not that kind of girl.”
+1 Internets for you sir.
Great read, and thanks for putting this out. I upvote all the positive comments, and downvote all the others…
I finally bought the story just now and read it in one sitting. Wow. Yeah, damn good. I sort of started to figure out what was going on, but you still pulled out enough twists that I didn’t see the end coming. Also, “In a crumpled cellophane voice, she said…”–I fucking love that phrasing!
Thoroughly enjoyed the read. I was sitting in my car in a parking lot waiting for the rain to subside, and took a quick glance at the book on my phone to pass the time. Needless to say, I found the story so engaging that I had to finish it even after the storm subsided, right there behind my steering wheel. Great characters and it left me wanting more of the story. Any thoughts to expanding the story? Thank you again for the story, well worth the five dollars.
I’m glad you enjoyed it! I don’t have any plans to expand it. It’s a short story on its own, and rather than mess with it any more, I’ve set it into the world, so I can get back to work on the novel.
Just a quick note of praise and thanks for this bit of work. I thoroughly enjoyed it and found the reveal at the end very satisfying.
Well done!
I am getting an error message when I click on the email link. My order was 6672, last Monday. Can you help? Thanks.
Listen Wil, it looks like my comments on your story hurt the feelings of at least one of your readers. And I don’t like hurting people’s feelings, so If I hurt yours as well I am sorry.
I understand that you’re using your writing to work through some of your own feelings and that there’s a lot of yourself in what you wrote. I also understand that (consciously or not) you’re using a litany of traumas as a form of narrative shorthand for how you feel. I know that it’s hard for you to have grown up as a child who suffered emotional neglect, especially because so many people don’t understand how abusive that is and how much harm it does. I know that i makes you feel like your feelings are less valid, or like you’re some kind of fraud because you never suffered “real” abuse. I’m sure it didn’t help that you’re famous for playing characters who suffered serious losses.
But my criticism of your fictional character is not a criticism of your feelings, it’s criticism of the way you developed your fictional character. I also realize that you’re a person who’s spend a lot of your life feeling picked on for being sensitive, but understand this, the multiple trauma’s you’ve inflicted on poor Jay would more likely lead to a total emotional shut down, instead of feelings he’d just have a giant mass of scar tissue. Not mention, crying in public is humiliating, and this is a kid who would be desperately trying to protect himself from hurt. This is not the same as saying you’re a weak person for crying or for having feelings. I’m not attaching value judgements to feelings. I’m saying there are different types of responses to different types of traumas, not that one response is valid and the other means “you, you personally, you suck.” I’m also not sure that dressing up your own feelings in all these events is good for you, because as much as it as it might do a disservice to my experiences, it also perpetuates to idea that your own experiences are somehow unworthy. Like you’re only justified in feeling the way that you do if all “these things” had happened to you.
Anyway, that is what I got when I read your story. I just didn’t say it because it seemed maybe unkind. But if I already sound unkind, I may as well offer you some benefit from it. It’s really not a bad story, but there are parts of it that don’t feel truthful. I think you’re a good writer, but there’s always room to be better. You want to come as close to realism as you can, even if it’s horror.
And for what it’s worth, all my favourite friends are people with shitty childhoods. If my parents were assholes, my husband’s parents were monsters. His best friend had the kind of horrific childhood that you only ever hear about in some bullshit movie of the week. My best friend came here as a child refugee from a war zone. Her father was killed in the fighting, her mother died of cervical cancer four months after they got arrived, there’d been no real medical care in the refugee camps, and by the time they got here it was much too late.
So you can believe me when I tell you that you were abused enough ok? Hurt is hurt. And feeling unwanted by the people who are supposed to love you is maybe one of the worst hurts of all. If you’re worried that can’t stand up and be counted as an abused kid, well the only people who will turn you away are clueless asshole, or people aren’t willing to face their own pain, and that’s true for all of us (I mean hey, at least we got to grow up, right? At least we weren’t beaten to death as babies. We should be grateful). You can come in our clubhouse Wil, I promise, you’re welcome. I officially anoint you a valid and justified member of the walking wounded. Just… Remember that when you’re writing.
To clarify, I’m not even close to upset by anything you’ve said. I moved beyond that years ago….letting folks online upset me. More than anything, I feel sad for you. You remind me of my father. And that makes me sad. I truly wish you the best. An open mind is the best kind of mind.
Ok.
I see what you’re trying to say here, and I think you have a lot of potential to write good criticism, but I don’t think you’re expressing yourself well. For example, you said, ” It’s a very poetic kind of prose and I’d respectfully recommend you spend some time reading Oscar Wilde.” A better way to phrase that would be, “It’s a very poetic kind of prose. It reminded me somewhat of writers like Oscar Wilde. Have you read him?” It’s less presumptuous and patronizing that way. It also seems like your projecting your own personal experiences on both Wil’s story and his life. I don’t call bullshit on your story, but your story is your story. If other people’s stories don’t ring true to you, that’s not necessarily a failure of the author, because different people have different experiences.
What you’re really saying here is “Your story didn’t work for me.” And probably also “Your story just wasn’t for me.” (See Austin Kleon’s post about not enjoying someone else’s writing: http://austinkleon.com/2016/10/18/it-wasnt-for-me/) And those are both fine reactions. You can say that without being presumptuous and patronizing.
I appreciate the response and I see pretty clearly what you’re getting at. I also liked the link, it was really cool.
I suppose you’re right about being patronizing. I was a TA for a long time, I’ve marked a lot of papers and a lot of creative projects, I’ve tutored a lot of people in their writing, I’ve written a lot of things, published a few things, and helped a lot of people edit their work. I suppose it gave me a habit of saying “hey you should do this,” which is cool when I’m talking to a student, but maybe not so much for other people. So fair point.
The thing is, when I was an undergrad, I had this one professor who always gave me an 83. And it bothered me because I was used solid 90’s and I was already a TA. Anyway, I figured that it was just this one prof, but I kept taking her classes because she taught all this awesome stuff like Women in Religion, and History of Christianity, and Religion and Magic (which will melt your brain). Anyway, one day a friend of mine asked me for help with an essay she was having trouble with, so I helped her out, really quite a lot. When her paper comes back she gets a 95%, but I still get an 83%. Except I know that my paper is better than hers, because I had read them both. So finally I go to my professor and ask why always do I always get an 83%? My friends get higher grades, why do mine suck so much? So she said “because you’re the one who’s wants to go to grad school and you need to write publishable quality work.”
I really like Wil, and I think he’s a super nice guy, I think he’s smart and I think he’s talented and think there is a lot in this story that is amazing. His dialogue is incredible, a lot his scenes and characters are so so good. But there are also a few places that are not equal to the rest. When I read it, it reminded me of my professor (who wrote me killer reference for grad school btw) and what she said to me and how she was trying to help me with those god damn 83s.
I think it’s a shame that Wil doesn’t have professors like I did, who can mentor him and help him develop his writing to its full potential. So I suggested he read the Oscar Wilde instead. Writing is a skill. Most successful writers are formally trained and Wil hasn’t had that benefit.
As for the other stuff, I don’t expect his character to be me, or react like me. To be honest I’d be kind of pissed off if he did make his character into me (not that I’m concerned). But he’s did so well with the other parts. His family scene at the beginning is wonderful, and the way he talks about self medicating with alcohol, or trouble with nightmares I can really see that he knows what he’s talking about. Even the scene in the car outside the elementary school is really well done, but there are other places where he’s not as strong. This is why I suggested, not that he write about me, but that he does more research so that his characterizations are consistently strong.
Anyway, I have no idea why I’m typing this much. Thank you for the feedback. I really think you’re right.
“Most successful writers are formally trained” — Um, yeah, that’s not even remotely true, Many, many writers never went to school and studied writing. I have a BA in English and took a lot of writing classes in college, and I’ve had at least as much bad advice from instructors as good, usable advice (including a published author who gave me a D in their class solely because I refused to conform to their writing style and wrote the kinds of stories I wanted to read). I think I’d have written more fiction in my life if I’d ignored what other people said about writing and wrote the way my gut told me to write.
I’ll point now to successful author Chuck Wendig’s post about studying literature and writing: http://terribleminds.com/ramble/2017/03/10/should-a-writer-get-an-english-degree-yes-or-no/
I can see that you mean well, and for all I know Wil’s read your comments and thought, “Oh yeah, good advice!” But I do think it’s important to point out that unsolicited advice is not always wanted or helpful and one doesn’t need good teachers to be a good writer.
“including a published author who gave me a D in their class solely because I refused to conform to their writing style”
Ugh, I think I also had that teacher. That’s honestly the laziest shit in the world. If you can’t properly articulate a critique of your student’s writing, then you shouldn’t be teaching people to write.
I wouldn’t suggest studying “writing” exactly anyway. Formal composition is basically a necessity (which used to be taught a lot better at much earlier stages of education) but beyond that, personally I think there are better things to study. Take, for example, the Archaeology of Art and Architecture. Art books are insanely expensive to produce, and obviously you can’t publish an archaeological paper and just have it filled with pictures. So, in order to be able to write about the subject effectively, you really need to be able to describe your artifacts clearly and in detail. That means a huge focus of studying ancient art (at least when I took it) was being able to take an image or even a set of blueprints, and recreate them in words. Plus you get to learn a bunch of other cool stuff. If you consider that someone like Wil has had most of his training in a medium that takes words and turns them into images, you can see where he could really benefit from that kind of approach. Languages and translation are also really good, because you really learn a lot about how words function and an insane amount about grammar and composition. And again, a lot of other cool stuff. And, of course, I’m pretty sure that Wil’s amazing skill with dialogue comes from his decades of acting experience. I’m a big believer in learning to write as more of a holistic exercise. Oddly enough, I’ve actually had almost exact this conversation with Wil, I’d say he knows his own mind pretty well.
Ordinarily I’d be on board with you about the unsolicited advice about writing, except that having read this blog, I’ve seen that Wil’s had real issues with bad advice in the past and he’s been hurt by it. To put it bluntly, Wil’s story was good, it was good enough to be published (whatever personal issues I have with it aside), but it wasn’t ready to be published. It’s free of typos, yes, but it’s full of compositional errors and repetitions and it has a couple of continuity issues (and yes I know I’m being vague about “errors” but I don’t want to highlight them here because maybe other people haven’t noticed them). Wil wants to be a career writer, and I just didn’t feel right about saying it was great, when it the truth is that it could be great, but it still needs work. I wanted to say it was great, I really, really, really did, but conversely enough, it just felt like a really disrespectful thing to do.
Anyway, he’s spent almost 40 years in Hollywood, I’m sure he can cope with my criticism. And if he doesn’t like it, he knows where to find me if he wants to tell me I suck, turn about is fair play after all.
Once again, thank you for the perspective and the cool link. Wil’s blog sets a limit on responses, so I’m not sure I can respond to you again (or that you can respond to me), in which case, I’ve enjoyed hearing your perspective.
I saw your CYA yesterday. I’m sorry to hear you’re not feeling well. If my comments here contributed to your unwell state I am truly sorry. I have had the good fortune and the privilege to be educated by a number of amazing people (my always 83% professor was this lady: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Go0vUKVd-N8&feature=share) and the thing that was always emphasized to me is that without criticism, we can’t progress, we stagnate. We need mistakes so that we have space to grow as we move forward. The corrections that we make create the foundation that we build our futures on. I realize that my criticism was overly personal and at the same time also very vague. I can elucidate on the more objective aspects (I swear it was nothing world ending – small errors) if it will give you something positive to focus on because sometimes it’s good to have a concrete focus, but otherwise I promise I will never mention it again.
TLDR: If I tore you down at time that you really needed people who would build you up, I am sorry, I am the worst ever. Mea Culpa.
You’re super talented Wil Wheaton, and you’re going to be amazing.
Huh,… that exerpt wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I may have to buy the thing now.