CruiseTrek

This is a public service announcement, with guitar!
I have signed on to attend the upcoming CruiseTrek to Alaska.
CruiseTrek is always lots of fun, and I’m really looking forward to being a part of this year’s cruise. I’ll be bringing a small sketch comedy troupe with me, and we’ll be performing a sketch show, similar to the one we did in Las Vegas, but with some new material. We’ll also be performing an improv show, and we’re going to run some improv workshops for anyone who’s interested. You can get more information about the cruise here.
In completely unrelated news, I hung a screen door over the weekend, and it was one of the hardest, most frustrating home improvement things I’ve ever done.
How about a thought for today? We haven’t had one of those in quite some time:


“Consistency is the last resort of the unimaginative.”
-Oscar Wilde

131 thoughts on “CruiseTrek”

  1. I think it was a little more than five minutes, Mr. Wheaton. Then again, we haven’t heard from Spudnuts in a while. I think he and the ladies might be getting an early start on CruiseTrek, if you know what I mean…
    Anyways, since we’re all either clammoring about Spudnuts’ sexual prowess or feeling the urge to leave our “inspirational thoughts”, I thought I’d offer up one with true practical applications. Besides, it might help seeing as you’ve been sweating over some deadlines the last few days…
    “If you’re gonna write a comedy scene, you’re gonna have some rat feces in there…”
    David Cross, Mr. Show with Bob and David
    God, I love that…
    Well, there’s some sci-fi porn on Skinamax right now… Perhaps I should go.

  2. For everybody’s information Spud was busy with me!!!!!
    Spudnuts that was unforgettable, memorable, satisfying, electrifying, stupendous, and ultimately momentous.
    Such skill, ohhhhhhhh I will never forget the way you held and caressed. The way you aimed with such precision, contention and excellence.
    You really are the master of it. You really do know everything there is to know. You taught me so much I will never forget the way you pushed and stripped each layer, to expose the beauty beneath ohhhhhhhhhh so breathtaking!
    Can I watch you use your Photoshop again *L*
    What? What? Gezz you people, what did you think was going on? *tsk *tsk Wil was right you people can’t be trusted!
    (puts halo back on) *tsk *tsk *sigh =P

  3. Miss Kitty Fantastico-
    i, a relative WWDN-neophyte compared to those such as yourself, spudnuts, rob, etc, would never presume to consider myself your peer. of course your wisdom and experience far surpass mine in such matters. my apologies.
    can i help it that i discovered this place and these people too late? sniff. now i’m just another girl… lusting over spudnuts… or, rather, the wit and wisdom dispensed by this nameless faceless (to me) spudnuts.
    and besides, what girl wouldn’t JUMP at the chance for a threesome?
    ha.

  4. “Come on baby get your friend in here and we can edit some pictures of me again in funny positions with that picture of wil. Oh yea baby touch my mouse. touch it!” -spudz ’02

  5. I just want everyone to know that on my lunchbreak today I went to Sears and bought a weight bench and some weights.
    Why did I do that?
    They had this really sweet edger that was about the same price and my lawn is really getting aggressive with my sidewalk. The neighbors notice. And they talk. Those fuckers talk and talk and talk.
    So.
    I was thinking… maybe the edger.
    Or some Xbox thing.
    But then I was like…
    No.
    The weight set.
    Why?
    I don’t look too bad in my un-clothes. But, ladies… “not too bad” is not good enough. I’ve got to look extraordinarily unbad. I need a physique that can make grown men weep. And women too.
    I guess.
    I need an outer me that can match the inner me.
    How the fuck is it gonna look if I show up at some as-yet-to-be-named economy lodge in the Midwest to service a chorus line of Spud-loving honeys and my abs are three-pack? Sure, they’re “okay.” They’re “fine.” But fuck that.
    Fuck fine.
    Fuck it two tines.
    Fuck.
    I’m sweating for you, ladies.
    Because quality goes in before the name goes on.

  6. if this was a different era i might swoon. but that’s a bit too victorian, i think.
    nothing like a mix of amusement and arousal [ ;) ] to keep you coming back to wilwheaton.net.
    (sorry, wil. can’t help it. and- nah i wish not to break the mood. stick with “lusting” for spudnuts.)

  7. Hehee… you all have no idea how much fun it was writting the last post.
    Now I trully believe that all women have the power to be a lil’ sex goddess.
    To become that you don’t need to lose something.
    You need to gain it.
    Confidence in yourself is the biggest bonus you can ever bring.
    But for men… Spuds… get all buff baby- we’ll wait.
    Isabel and all the other ladies-
    I was just securing first.
    You call all fight over that lusty second spot.
    Just make sure you capture it on video.
    And Hops… never a klingon moment for me.
    I may get disowned from Spuds’ lil’ world but I have a higher place in my heart for B5 than Trek.
    And that all comes down to one thing- Trek only had ONE Harlan Ellison episode and B5 had 5 seasons of that man in the mix.
    I wouldn’t be the women I am if that crazy angry man didn’t write as fine and funny shit as he does.
    -MKF

  8. So, clearly this thing is already growing beyond reasonable limits. I could just set-up a domain called http://www.letsgetspudhisthreeway.com, but I suspect the bandwidth issues on that would make this site’s woes look quaint by comparison.
    No.
    What I need is some type of email address to accept names for this project.
    You know… some type of mailing list that sends out updates on my pecs or lats or such. Lets all of the lovely young women know how my training is coming along. Make sure everyone gets a number and the line-squabbling issues are kept to a minimum.
    I’ll try to set something up tomorrow and post the address here.
    Don’t worry.
    I’ve already entered this “to do” onto my PDA:
    “Organize threeway with hot chicks from WWDN.”
    I labeled it “high” priority.
    Red color.
    So, I’m pretty sure that means I’ll get around to it.

  9. LMAO…@Spud and isabel
    Wil for me that Uncle Willy look will never fade. If I don’t gain a space in the Spudslutsorama, it’s ok coz I know in Uncle Willy’s strong and yielding imaginary arms I will always be welcomed.
    The excitement of knowing that at any moment he would look up from that pile of work he has and wipe all these comments is enough excitement for me.
    That hat and that smile does it for me anytime, pimp me Uncle Willy.
    Oh! just the thought of it tee hee.
    I hope none of my relatives read this ( I was just kidding Ma!)

  10. I remain your faithful servant Wil, please post something new as this comments board is getting way toooooo HOT, and Spud hasn’t even posted his new photoshop makeover.
    I wonder if Uncle Willy lifts weights too??
    Aha! a new thought to amuse me while I get ready for work..hmmmm

  11. I think that if this threeway can somehow be arranged to coincide in some way with magically advanced screenings of the next two LotR movies and SWIII, then I might just be able to die happy.
    Will there be chocolate involved?

  12. IF YOU GO BACK TO MARCH 2002 ARCHIVES I WAS FIRST!
    SO TAKE THAT!
    SPUDNUTS REMEMBERS!
    NOW you all can get it line to argue over WHO
    is going to be SECOND, THIRD, ETC.
    Hm …however perhaps Spuddy and I should
    confer ON THAT ISSUE.
    THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE, (IMMORTAL!)ONE.

  13. You want me to spend time going through an archive just to point out that I indeed was the first?
    Can’t- cuts into my bass playing time and my kazoo lessons.
    Spuds is ultimately in charge of who seeks out his pants and boldly goes wherever he wants.
    He knows who’s been naughty and who deserves steak knives in eyes.
    I have faith in Spuds.

  14. Egocentricity.
    It wasn’t too long ago that you were slagging Vancouver because we tend to attract a lot of what you termed “runaway productions”. Now you’ll be visiting our fair city… Enjoy your time here Wil.
    You know, it’s not our fault that it’s cheaper to make movies here…

  15. Yeah I’m really getting good.
    I have “Tribute” by Tenacious D almost down.
    Side note: I am so gonna kick Ferrell’s butt for destroying that BEAUTIFUL B5 plate in the “Panic Room” spoof on the MTV movie awards.
    I mean I could understand breaking a smurf plate, or hell even a Crusade plate with Peter Woodward’s signed autograph and all (the man is a stuffy ol’ codger anyhoo) but a B5 cast plate?
    Sick man. Sick.
    -MKF

  16. Hi Wil,
    Hope you enjoy your time in Vancouver if you get a chance to look around before you embark. It’s a great city, I live a ferry away from it. BTW, if you would like a tour guide, it’d be cool to meet you. BTW: I’m 38/F and not a wingnut. There.
    Also BTW: Statistically, Canada represents just 20% of the U.S. produced movies/shows. Think: Harry Potter (England), Star Wars/clones (Australia), Lord of the rings (New Zealand), Notting Hill (England), etc.

  17. I seriously considered going on one of those things. But seeing as how I get horribly boat sick there’s not a chance. Not to mention there’s also the fact that I have a horse, 2 cows, 2 cats, and a diabetic mother to take care of.
    You think a screen door is a pain? Try ripping up your flooring so it can be replaced. I still have to fix my ceiling, the plumbing, the wiring, my closet doors, the walls in the laundry room, and the entire freaking barn. Now THAT is going to be fun.
    Of course that’s not really home improvement, it’s home repair after what my deadbeat tenants did to the place.
    luv,
    -Su

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