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Trek XI

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Fark had a photoshop contest yesterday. The theme was to make a poster for the next Star Trek movie.
Currently leading the voting is the following poster, brilliantly designed by Reisende. Thanks, man!

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23 December, 2002 Wil

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Christmas 2002 → ← The Fires of Mordor

72 thoughts on “Trek XI”

  1. Joshua Sucher says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:22 pm

    Beautiful! I’d pay $10 to see that.

  2. jer says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:23 pm

    Wil,
    It’s kinda like “The Crusher-does-Elvis” motion picture 🙂
    Anyways, kudos for the interesting read you provide me with, as well as your talent for me to appreciate.
    Merry Xmas, and get crazy with the cheez whiz!
    -=Jer

  3. Steve says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:23 pm

    Nicely done. I’ll be farked!

  4. EnglishBen says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:40 pm

    Fark Rules All!
    That really *is* your Elvis picture.
    Young Elvis of course. *Grins Evily*
    Are we to assume that any film based on this poster would be made after Rick Bermans forthcoming shock, totally not on purpose, well planned & executed “accident”?
    Say the word Wil, say the word…

  5. Metalboy says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:43 pm

    I’ve been Farking your blue hair for days… 😉

  6. Metalboy says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:45 pm

    this is my favorite so far…
    http://media.unearthed.org/fark/fark-pink.jpg
    heh

  7. Sunidesus says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:45 pm

    I saw that thread over there. *giggle snort* very funny stuff from Farkistan!

  8. tj says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:45 pm

    You ARE seven of nine … meow

  9. Michelle says:
    23 December, 2002 at 5:58 pm

    I WANT TO SEE THIS MOVIE!!!! : ) Merry Christmas everyone!

  10. Megan says:
    23 December, 2002 at 6:13 pm

    Man, that’s the funniest thing I’ve seen all year, hands down. And yeah, that’s how dull my life really is. ^_^ haha

  11. Ryan_W says:
    23 December, 2002 at 6:28 pm

    OMG!!! That’s freakin brilliant!
    I just saw Nemesis again with my bro and a friend who wanted to go, and I made sure to point you out in it. Everyone i’ve talked to about this movie ive said “Hey, Wil’s in the movie!” and they all look at me like I have 5 heads until I say that i’m a huge fan of your site and that they will be to when they come…..which they usually end up doing and being. 🙂
    Anyways, just rambling on as usual.
    I’ll shut up after I say “I hope everyone has a happy Holiday Season – whatever you choose to celebrate”

  12. jozjozjoz says:
    23 December, 2002 at 6:38 pm

    I love that… the return of Wheaton (as opposed to Crusher)
    Man, that’s a good-looking Borg on that poster!

  13. Mamajessy says:
    23 December, 2002 at 6:50 pm

    How very borg-ish of you!! Nice!! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year you stinker!

  14. Reena says:
    23 December, 2002 at 7:10 pm

    Awesome! (I wish I had photoshop.)

  15. Sam says:
    23 December, 2002 at 7:27 pm

    HAW HAW HAW
    that’s really amusing

  16. terry says:
    23 December, 2002 at 7:44 pm

    Great Picture. I think it should have blue hair. And should be tittled “STAR TREK XI THE WRATH OF WES”.

  17. Jason FUTUREWONDER says:
    23 December, 2002 at 7:53 pm

    V.O.
    He’s Returned and he’s pissed.
    Fade In.
    Interior Bridge Of Enterprise
    Captain Picard
    Number One, what in the sam hell was that noise?
    Riker
    Why, it came from the turbo lift.
    The turbolift doors open reveling Wesley Crusher.
    Beverely
    WES!!! YOU’RE ALIVE!!
    Wesley
    Thats right. Season after season after season of saving this damn ship and not one promotion!!!! Not one!!!! Wesley never got what he deserved.
    Bev
    But, honey I gave you great head every night!
    Wes
    Shush, mom. Now your all going to pay.
    Wesley pulls out phaser from behind his back and holds it up in direct view.
    Wesley
    Dearly…
    Wesley switches Phaser to nuclear Bush kill mode.
    Fade Out.
    V.O.
    Comming This Fall
    Jason
    Yeah I’m bored as hell.

  18. Michelle says:
    23 December, 2002 at 8:07 pm

    I voted for it!!!!! Haha 🙂

  19. michael says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:00 pm

    Merry Christmas everybody. I like to use racial slurs because I’m too stupid to think of anything better to say.
    The anonymous Internet is perfect for cowards like me!
    12.158.109.142

  20. Katie says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:11 pm

    Looks like it could be a cool movie. Hey Wil, wanna come to Sydney, we can film it with my friend’s camera. There is nothing the Sydney Harbour Bridge can’t make even cooler.

  21. Geoff says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:12 pm

    Finally, a Star Dreck movie I’d like to see.
    Now if only it could be directed by Leonard Nimoy-oh that’s as likely too, right. . .

  22. AntiFreeze says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:20 pm

    I liked “The Wrath of Crusher” best.
    “First his scenes get cut,
    then he gets shafted on premiere night..
    now the only thing he cares about is vengance!”
    Come on, assimilate Berman damnit!

  23. Xdesertman says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:29 pm

    Glad you liked Wrath of Crusher.. that one was mine 😉

  24. DaveL says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:46 pm

    Too bad it had to be an ODD numbered movie, Wil.
    Better luck next time. 😉
    Merry Christmas to you and the family and all the best for the new year.

  25. Fabian says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:49 pm

    Wil,
    Well, now you are seen and heard. You also have way to much time on your hands. It was funny and I did not faint.
    FG

  26. Ebb Vicious says:
    23 December, 2002 at 9:51 pm

    Hi everyone.
    Just wanted you all to know that it’s Christmas, and I have nobody to spend it with.
    So I thought I’d put people down in an infantile way to make my life feel less pathetic.
    68.43.232.184

  27. Greg says:
    23 December, 2002 at 10:49 pm

    “Star Trek XII: The Final Wrath of Spocks Undiscovered Deep Space Insurrection With Voyager’s Nemesis.”
    Okay, I needed something to do, and Wil inspired it. 😉

  28. Drakensykh says:
    23 December, 2002 at 11:12 pm

    I always thought it was creepier when the Borg said “Resistance is irrelevant” — like, yeah, go ahead and resist if you want; whatever, no skin off our metal teeth.
    Yeeks.
    So I think “Berman is irrelevant” sounds pretty snazzy.
    I like the idea of a pissed Wes Crusher nuking something important. Yeah! Phasers _and_ those cool Jedi Powers.

  29. Pat says:
    23 December, 2002 at 11:38 pm

    I LOVE IT! I LOVE IT! I LOOVE IT!
    I also liked the Wrath of Crusher.

  30. loretta652 says:
    23 December, 2002 at 11:41 pm

    I think the Qube Photoshop is pretty funny.
    Nemesis movie spoiler warning, but if you’re reading Wil’s blog, how can you not expect a movie discussion?
    :
    :
    :
    Ok, so are you ever going to explain why Wesley is in a NG dress uniform at the wedding? The character left Starfleet. I don’t think he’s entitled to wear a uniform, is he? I think it would have been cooler if you had worn civvies. Do you have to wait until the dvd is released before you can tell us?
    I must say that the movie had a lot of plot holes. Why this, who’s that, how can he do that, why does he want to do that? But it makes for interesting discussions, if nothing else.
    Happy Holidays, all!

  31. Drood says:
    24 December, 2002 at 12:49 am

    At least you KINDA made it into Nemesis… For about 2 seconds on the left side of the screen during Picards speech…
    BAH! And how the hell is Janeway an admiral ahead of Picard now?

  32. wade art says:
    24 December, 2002 at 1:01 am

    Wil,
    I agree with the leader in the contest… but…
    honorable mention should go to:
    “STAR TREK” ENINEMESIS
    THE WRATH OF CRUSHER…
    SPOCKS BENDER
    AND QUBE…

  33. Spudnuts says:
    24 December, 2002 at 1:31 am

    “Star Trek: Prosthesis.”
    The entire cast of Next Generation is captured by… um… some alien fucking race who find human legs a delicacy. You know… like the French and frog legs. In fact, let’s just go ahead and call this new alien race “the French,” because they come from the planet of France. And throw a fucking strip of masking tape across the bridge of their noses and make them talk with a lisp… BECAUSE THEY ARE FUCKING ALIENS. So. Then they eat one leg off of each crew member. Then… They escape. The Enterprise guys. But they all only have one leg. Even Beverly Crusher. Then a Romulan captain… um… Captain… um… Balak. Aw, fuck it. Give him an extra K. BECAUSE HE’S A FUCKING ALIEN. Captain Balakk who runs the infamous carny planet Rigel 5… So Captain Balakk’k captures them and ties them all to a fucking post. And he feeds them cabbage. And beats them viciously with a stick. Every day. Twice a day. Often THREE times a day. He makes them walk around that post with their one legs until they wear a groove in the alien soil. And no one ever comes to save them.
    Ever.

  34. Spudnuts says:
    24 December, 2002 at 1:33 am

    And if anyone posts my idea to Fark or steals it I will beat their fucking heads in with a fucking shovel.
    You fucking tool.
    Have a nice day!
    The lobster’s from Maine.

  35. glovefox says:
    24 December, 2002 at 2:14 am

    Brilliant poster, Wil!
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and your family!

  36. glovefox says:
    24 December, 2002 at 2:14 am

    Brilliant poster, Wil!
    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and your family!

  37. Chewie says:
    24 December, 2002 at 5:44 am

    That’s great! Now if only they’d make it….probably turn out way better than ST X.

  38. Ivy says:
    24 December, 2002 at 5:59 am

    Damn, baby! You’re looking mighty fine!

  39. jen says:
    24 December, 2002 at 6:10 am

    mmmmmmmmmm what a cute borg……. 🙂

  40. nanny says:
    24 December, 2002 at 6:12 am

    love the poster, it should say something like “the return of Wesley Crusher!
    LOL
    Anyway that is such a great poster, I’d go see the movie too.
    I’ve always been a Wesley Crusher/wil wheaton fan.
    oh yeah there’s this guy who’s the publicist for Christian Bale who’s a real jerk off/ok he’s a n asshole!, had the nerve to call you names. too bad I’m not in his balehead group and get the emails from someone who keeps me posted on stuff.
    long story, anyway I had her kinda tell him off, I’m surprised she didn’t get kicked out for voicing her opinion.
    anyway MERRY CHRISTMAS WIL and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
    Give my love to your families!
    nanny

  41. Hondo says:
    24 December, 2002 at 7:48 am

    I think it will be great even if it is an odd numbered movie. Remember, every fifth movie really sucks bigtime and is followed by a really good one.
    Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Stardate!

  42. Deacon Blues says:
    24 December, 2002 at 7:55 am

    Egads! That ROCKS, Wil!
    I’m sure the plot has some interesting twists.
    * Picard and Riker get put in the brig after a particularly crazy pub crawl
    * Betazed outlaws clothing (but Ferenginar has a revival on bustles and hoop skirts a la Victorean England)
    * Worf discovers Data’s personality living in his replicator
    * Chekov appears from some strange spacewarp called Babylon 5
    * The Enterprise-L (yah, Picard blew up F through K trying to get laid) meets up with a HUGE derelect with only a human, a robot, an evolved cat, and a hologrammatic dead guy on board
    * and at the crux of the crisis, Wes and 7of9 hook up (in more ways than one) to defeat the greatest threat the Universe has ever known… RICK BERMAN HAS TAKEN CONTROL OF THE GATEWAY TO FOREVER! Nooooooo!!!

  43. mykul says:
    24 December, 2002 at 7:58 am

    Wanna see something else funny?
    http://www.petitiononline.com/antiBerm/petition.html

  44. d. burr says:
    24 December, 2002 at 8:33 am

    STAR TREK XI…TRAVELIN’ MAN (the journeys through space, time and infinity of wesley crusher the guy on the editing room floor).

  45. Daisy says:
    24 December, 2002 at 8:34 am

    I am assuming that on the DVD we will see the cut scenes of Wesley – Captain of his own starship.

  46. d.burr says:
    24 December, 2002 at 8:36 am

    by the way, the hair from that picture will soon be on e-bay.

  47. john holms says:
    24 December, 2002 at 8:52 am

    YOU ARE A FAG!

  48. Nathaniel Harty says:
    24 December, 2002 at 8:59 am

    “YOU ARE A FAG!” — john holms
    What the heck? Are you 12?

  49. Reisende says:
    24 December, 2002 at 9:04 am

    No problem Wil! Glad you liked the pic. I thought after getting cut out of Nemesis you’d want a little revenge. 😉

  50. cookiemonster says:
    24 December, 2002 at 9:06 am

    forgot to photoshop but woted on that one… no, i’m not brown nosing at all… 😉

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