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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

announcement two of four (collect them all!)

  • WWdN in Exile

Last week, I mentioned one of those “so cool I can’t talk about it” projects. Today, I can go ahead and reveal what it was: I composed that post about an hour before I put on pointy sideburns and a space suit, brought Lieutenant Commander Wesley Crusher back to life as the Assistant Chief Engineer of the USS Titan.

Before I tell you why, I would like to point out that it was particularly gratifying to see that his rank, considering this, from Dancing Barefoot:

“One time, when we were renegotiating our contracts, we were all asking for raises.

“We all felt a salary increase was appropriate, because The Next Generation was a hit. It was making gobs of money for Paramount,” (I like that word – gobs) “and we felt that we should share in that bounty.

“Of course, Paramount felt otherwise, so a long and annoying negotiation process began.

“During that process, the producers’ first counteroffer was that, in lieu of a raise, they would give my character a promotion, to lieutenant.”

I pause, and look around. I wrinkle my brow, and gaze upward.

“What? Were they serious?”

A fan hollers, “Yeah! Lieutenant Crusher! Woo!”

I smile back at him.

“My agent asked me what I wanted to do. I told him to call them back and remind them that Star Trek is just a television show.”

Okay, that was risky to say. It’s pretty much the opposite of just a television show to these people, but I’ve gotten the audience back, and they giggle.

“I imagined this phone call to the bank,” I mime a phone, and hold it to my ear. “Hi . . . Uh, I’m not going to be able to make my house payment this month, but don’t worry! I am a lieutenant now.” I pause, listening to the voice on the other end.

“Where? Oh, on the Starship Enterprise.”

I pause.

“Enterprise D, yeah, the new one. Feel free to drop by Ten Forward for lunch someday. We’ll put it on my officer’s tab!”

It’s for Star Trek: The Tour, which starts in Long Beach on January 17th, where it’s going to live for about a month before it goes on a national tour later this year.

In addition to the encounter thing that I’m in, there are some really cool things for Trekkies on this tour, including full-size recreations of the NCC-1701 and NCC-1701-D bridges (where you can trade some of your gold-pressed latinum for the opportunity to sit in the captain’s chair and pose for a picture) corridors you can walk through, and more costumes and props than you could feed a Targ. Sadly, there is no Ten Forward where we can all have a drink on my officer’s tab, but there is a killer app that I can’t wait to try out: There is this thing where you step into a blue screen environment, and through the magic of teleprompters, multiple camera angles, and creative editing, perform in a mini episode of the original series, where you’ll get to act with Kirk and Spock. I’m hoping that I can improvise some dialog with Kirk about his, uh, luxurious maine of carefully-styled hair.

Two down, two to go! Be sure to drink your Ovaltine!

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8 January, 2008 Wil

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a look inside Star Trek: The Tour → ← this post contains lots of swears

57 thoughts on “announcement two of four (collect them all!)”

  1. Bog says:
    10 January, 2008 at 3:21 pm

    Heh. One of my Treasured Posessions is from when Star Trek: The Experience was at Hyde Park in London, and my wife and I Did the Thing.
    I have a photo of myself sat in the D’s Worry Seat, with one of my old college mates in Riker’s pew, and I’m waving “Engage!”
    With a cigarette in the waving hand. That just made it for me. Politcal incorrectness FTW!

  2. internetotaku says:
    12 January, 2008 at 9:05 pm

    Congratulations on the tour! Back in the saddle again….

  3. Scott T says:
    12 January, 2008 at 11:14 pm

    Long Beach! I’m there!!!

  4. sillylittlefreak says:
    13 January, 2008 at 6:12 am

    I think I might have to go check this out.
    Yeah, definitely. Not because I was ever a big fan of the show, but rather a huge fan of the set designers and prop guys. Gotta see it.
    Oh, and Wil…
    I am the guy that used to hang out outside your acting class when I was staying with Jim Caveizel. The class that was held near Hollywood and Vine. Yeah, the guy busily doodling in a sketchbook since I had nothing better to do. I wound up working in the video game business for the past 15 years. We both know how Jim’s career has gone. His wife is awesome and his son is adorable. You should give him a call!
    jon

  5. viki says:
    13 January, 2008 at 7:03 am

    Wil, congrats on this. I am giving my kids their Ovaltine and waiting for the next announcement. You made the first page of Digg w/this.

  6. littlenicola says:
    18 January, 2008 at 6:03 pm

    I see Chicago on that list… cool! Can’t wait – and congrats!

  7. Fenlyn, USAF says:
    21 January, 2008 at 11:57 am

    Wil… just went to the tour this weekend! Totally awesome… Armin Shimerman and Max Grodenchik were doing appearances on Sunday when I was there. Picardo was there on Saturday, and I think Alice Krige is there today.
    I have to admit, I totally forgot you said you had done something for this tour.
    It was really neat to see you, though. As I walked out of the “Encounter” thing, though, I said to my wife… “it’s nice to see Wil wearing the evil-Edward-Norton goatee.” She said, “it makes him look so distinguished!”
    Do you have any stories about shooting this? Did you work with Tim Russ at all or was it just “good timing” between the shots?
    Take care!
    Brad

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