nothing to prove

My brilliant friends The Doubleclicks made a beautiful video to go with their awesome song, Nothing To Prove. I’m honoured to be part of it.

This song is “Nothing to Prove” by the Doubleclicks:
You can submit your own sign at
This video was sourced from amazing geek girls around the world, as well as from some awesome Geeks: Kelly Sue Deconnick, Amy Berg, John Scalzi, Josh A. Cagan, Adam Savage, Paul & Storm, Wil Wheaton & more… THANK YOU!

The video concept is by Josh A. Cagan and the Doubleclicks, and the video was directed and edited by Angela Webber (of the Doubleclicks.) The concept was inspired by the book trailer for “Dear Teen Me.”

Do not read the comments. They are, sadly, a cesspool of predictable, adolescent misogyny from the sadly loud and obnoxious idiots who are the whole reason we keep having this conversation.

I have many stories and pictures to share from Comicon, which I’ll do just as soon as I fully recover from the trip.

50 thoughts on “nothing to prove”

  1. showed my kids the video this morning (my geek girl-child is in it!) and they all recognized you and giggled at your sign :).

    1. I loved this video!

      There are a LOT of bullies on my WoW server which they just combined a bunch of servers into – 99% of them male. Most of the bullying is done because we allow it – we don’t speak up when it occurs. I’ve gotten to the point when I hear it I shove it right back in their face for being whiny little 2 year olds. If we’re not standing up for our rights, we’re enabling people to abuse us. It sucks, but it’s been that way for a long time and the only way to change it is to refuse to allow it to take place in our presence. It’s sad that a response has to be that forceful, but it appears that’s the only thing that seeps down far enough into their brains to actual create thought about their actions. Oh for the day when people will seek balance instead of drama.

  2. Caught this video earlier today, and LOVED it. In fact, as I said on Facebook, I bought their album solely off the strength of this song and video. Loved your cameo, by the way, Wil. 😉

  3. I only discovered and became proud of my geekiness as a mom. I have two autistic boys – very high-functioning and profoundly geeky. They are my gurus. Through them I have embraced the joy of cosplay, gaming (mostly table top), Cons, and superheroes. I have also realized that I was always a geek, I just didn’t know it – comic books, Dr. Who, fantasy novels, sci-fi TV & movies, and (of course) Star Trek in all it’s fantastic forms.

    I love that my children are allowing and teaching me to be a better geek. I hope I am doing the same for them, and that someday they will meet that perfect geek girl (or boy) to share with them what they love and how they love it.

  4. I remember when someone would say they’re female on any popular forum or IRC channel and they would get both reverence and resentment that would fluctuate wildly…it would of course, swing to resentment pretty quickly. Heck, in some of the more popular IRC channels? Just saying “Hi all” would get whichever arsehole who was “talking” at the time to go off on a massive hissy fit. Goodness help you if they were a popular member (see what I did there? XD ).

    Asking if anyone wanted to play Unreal Tournament or Quake 3 Arena would generate a similar response. It’s why I went and found small gaming communities and forums where was little to no hate, it was just let’s all go play a game. The way it should be.

    But it shouldn’t be required to find smaller and less mainstream communities just so that games can be played with like-minded intelligent people. Returning to the more mainstream-ish sites after many years of just not bothering (I like my brain cells), the same (tired) arguments remain as no one has dragged the 15-year olds kicking and screaming into adulthood and they don’t see a problem. Unlike what you done for your son Mr Wheaton, those young ‘uns weren’t sat down to and explained what the word “rape” actually means. Likewise, also that sports are not unique to the male class and that they really need to level the hell up if they want to survive. Or be called gamer boys.

    Their choice.

    P.S. I’m a bloke, and have been present on the internet since I had a 14.4k modem back in 1999 using some of the UK’s first freephone ISPs. Having just typed that, I now feel extremely old…

  5. Great vid, nice tune, wonderful message. Kudos to all the wonderful folks who helped put this whole thing together. It’s kind of a tough pill to swallow that, in this day and age, people STILL need things like this to remind them of what’s really important. We should be above all the nonsense, and hate, and stupidity, and judgment by now. It really is as simple as don’t be a dick–there’s no better way to put it.

  6. I love this so much! Growing up I was into Star Wars and super heroes instead of Cabbage Patch Kids and Barbie. Science over makeup. Books over parties etc. I kinda teared up a bit at some of the signs. Definitely hit a nerve with me. Thanks for sharing. I’m sharing it everywhere! :)

  7. I was not prepared for this. So now I’m bawling and giggling simultaneously. And honestly, your face said it all; things have to equalize somewhere, so why not now?

  8. My daughter had her 8th Birthday today. She got the usual stuff, a little locker with jewels and her initial on it. A box with mermaid on it to keep her trinkets, necklaces and earrings and several “LaLaLoopsy” dolls. Her absolute favorite gift that she could not put down was her Sonic Screwdriver and she’s now sleeping with her Tardis plush. I am a VERY proud daddy tonight.

  9. While I generally do not like the term “geek girl” on principle (It’s just “geek,” thanks – why do we have to put a modifier on it? Can’t we all just get along?”), I loved this song. Twitter sent it may way earlier today and I sent it on. Mostly because it’s wonderful, but also because there are guys in it, too! Because the idea that no one has anything to prove to anyone is one I wholeheartedly embrace.

    No tests or fences here. All are welcome. Here we watch Stargate and Star Trek and Star Wars. We write fanfiction and cosplay, too. We don’t do much gaming, but if you do, that’s cool. I’d love to learn!

  10. Absolutely fabulous. Made me smile and sad at the same time. Smiling because of the courage it takes to own up to who you are in a public fashion and sad that people who are different can and are still castigated. I agree, don’t read the youtube comments, they are not worth the time.

  11. I consider myself lucky. I met most of my friends through BBS’s when I was younger. In Washington state, there were lots of girls and women who were BBSers, so almost every girl I ever met and found interesting was a geek, and it all seemed so normal to me.

    I was lucky enough to marry a gamer girl. Our daughter is a gamer girl. At our bi-weekly Pathfinder game, I’m one of the two guys out of the six players at our table. I can, with authority, declare that the more girls who are geeks, the better the world is!

    I don’t think I really “got it” until I watched this video. It’s really a giant box of many sads that there are women out there who don’t feel like they are as free to love what they love as us guys are.

    For my part, my family and friends always feel comfortable being a geek. I hope that little part I’ve played helps somehow in the grand scheme of things.

  12. I saw this yesterday for the first time and I thought it was wonderful! I recognized your right away, as well as a few other people. So glad that the Geek community is standing together, and strong. ^.^

  13. This is totally awesome Wil. I grabbed it (linked back here of course) for a post on my own blog today – . I am married to a geek girl from a huge gamer family (lots of Settlers of Catan) and have been a pretty bad influence on her. We’re raising two great boys who will have nothing but respect for other people’s passions regardless of gender or what that passion is.

    There’s plenty of room on this train for all of us, right?

  14. Brilliant, loved it. My daughter also loved it!
    It is a shame that some people resort to trolling, everyone knows you have low self esteem you don’t need to cry for help, we are all friends here!

  15. It doesn’t matter what kind of person you are. Be who you are. There will *always* be haters. There are people who look at me like I pulled a Zaphod when they find out I love soccer, or that I watch anime, or love sci-fi (NOT SyFy, damn you!!!), etc….

    Ignore the vocal minority. For every person who tells you that you’re an idiot and castigates you for what you love and how you love it, there are two people who will get just as excited about those things as you do. You just haven’t met them yet.

    And that’s why we have cons!

    I’ll echo what others have said many times, because it should be said often and loudly – we’re all just geeks. No matter what your geek specialty, with no qualifiers. Just geeks.

  16. I have been a ‘geek girl’ since the 1970s. I played 1st ed D&D when it was the only edition — and the misogyny in geekdom has driven me away from the community over and over again through the years. This video resonated so strongly with me that I riffed on it back home at my website.

    Thank you, Wil, for “not being a dick” and for standing up for womens’ full participation in geekdom. I am thrilled that the video is going viral, though I am old enough and cynical enough to suspect that we’ll still be having this argument when I’m in my 80s.

  17. Wil,
    Thank you for standing up for female geeks and for providing a forum where the comments section is _not_ a cesspool of hatred. My experience with geek misogyny in real life is that it comes in pockets of people; if you find the right pocket of people, geekdom is great fun. But if you end up in a pocket of misogynists and misogyny-apologists, geekdom is miserable and those misogynists will do everything they can to convince you that they are the norm and life is no better anywhere else.

    To anyone out there who is stuck in one of these pockets, trust me, you have other options! You _can_ find (or collect) a group of people – female and male (and maybe other) – who will treat you like a human and a friend.

    On the internet, though, there are no pockets, for the most part; forums are open to everyone. So when the misogynists poison the well, they poison globally.

    The misogyny-apologists are also ubiquitous on the internet, and they’re almost worse than the misogynists. These are the people who seem to think that the principles of free speech apply to misogynists but not to anyone who rebuffs misogynists. These are the people who tell posters to shut up whenever they call out a jerk for being a jerk.

    Conventions are another venue where misogynists get more exposure than their own circle of like-minded acquaintances and are harder to avoid, but not on the scale of the internet.

    Again, thank you for speaking up, and not letting these people be the loudest voice of geekdom.


  18. Love it. I need to be a part of a message like this with all my geek inspired tattoos and everything i own. i was 19 before i found a group that 100% accepted me and my awesomeness.

  19. LOVE IT! These are my people!

    BTW, I’m a total geek: Spider-Man, Star Trek, Star Wars, Doctor Who, etc. etc. But, I have to say, somehow I managed to snag a normal guy (don’t you call your wife a “normie”?). He tells me I may be a geek, but I’m HIS geek.

  20. My sister-in-law showed me the video this morning and it inspired me to find your blog and comment. I loved the video. I only recently have come to accept myself and my geekiness. I have always denied it to protect myself from the hatred and meanness of other people At 32 years old and a mother of three I have finally decided to be myself and enjoy myself. It brought tears to my eyes to see that I’m now alone. I feel like such a sap but thanks for this awesome video and being a part of it Wil! I hope I can teach my kids to enjoy being themselves.

  21. Anyone have a clue as to WHY the hatred? I mean really. There was a Kick Ass Women panel at Comicon, and I read what some of the audience members heard from the jerks in the audience. It made no sense to me. These women were talking about their experiences and some stupid guys got angry about it.

    When I have tried to understand what the actual problem is, they don’t have one, they just want to hate on women for no reason. All they really do is make it harder for even more people to create awesomeness for the universe.

    Can’t we lock them out of stuff until they learn better?

    Okay, I know we can’t, but somedays, I really want to.

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