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The w00tstockSD and comic-con 2010 FAQ

In just about 48 hours, I head down to San Diego for w00tstock and Comic-con. Here is my effort to answer questions about both:

w00tstock

Q: Are tickets available?

A: Yes. You can get them from Ticketbastard, or from the box office.

Q: Ticketbastard says there aren't any seats! Do I have to stand for the whole show?

A: No. Ticketbastard is stupid. This is a seated show, for your comfort.

Q: Ticketbastard says the show is sold out!

A: Yeah. Ticketbastard is fucking stupid, an evil corporation that we all hate, and they're lying to you.

Q: Woah. Why so angry?

A: Because it's bullshit that Ticketbastard makes you pay almost as much in fees as you pay for the ticket. I don't know a single performer who doesn't hate that damn company.

Q: So if I buy my ticket at the box office, it costs less, and I don't give any money to an evil corporation you hate?

A: Now you're getting it.

Q: But what if the show sells out before I can get to the box office?!

A: That's always a possibility, but I think it's unlikely. There are a couple hundred seats available right now, so if you get to the box office around the time it opens, you should be fine.

Q: But standing in line sucks.

A: I hear you. However, standing in line for w00tstock means you're surrounded by your fellow nerds! How fun is that?! Someone could, for instance, start an ad-hoc LineCon. You could play games like Zombie Dice and Pieces of Eight! Think about how the possibilities! Also, Think Geek is going to be at w00tstock, giving away Geek A Week trading
cards
, and I heard that there may be ice cream for people in line.

Q: WHAT?!

A: Yep. I guess I should say that again -

Q: And put it in bold!

A: Well, I'd never think to do that myself, but since you suggested it … Think Geek is going to be at w00tstock, giving away Geek A Week trading
cards
, and I heard that there may be ice cream for people in line.

Edit: Quick addition/clarification to this: Len Peralta, creator of Geek A Week, says, "ThinkGeek will be giving away the cards at SDCC, but at w00tstock, I'll be the one giving them away – when they purchase a poster.  It's a Free Gift with purchase sort of deal."

Q: What if we don't get to the line early? THEN WHAT WILL WE DO?!

A: I don't know, man. It's a big, scary world, filled with uncertainty.

Q: Okay, okay. Fine. So, when does w00tstock start?

A: Doors open at 6:30pm, and the show begins at 7:30pm.

Q: Where is it?

A: 4th and B. You know, you could find all this information out at the w00tstock website.

Q: Is this going to be another one of those 3 hour shows that's really 5 hours?

A: No. We promise it won't be that long. We know you have lots of comic-conning to do, and we won't keep you out too late.

Q: I heard the show is 21 and over. That sucks! Why did you do that?

A: It wasn't our choice, and we didn't know until the venue was booked that it was 21+. We're really sorry that our under-21 fans can't come to the show. Like Save Ferris sang, it sucks to be under twenty-one. (If it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty unhappy that my kids can't come and see the show.)

Q: Bah. I don't want my damn wiener kids listening, anyway.

A: I know, right?

Q: So who's in the show, anyway?

A: I'm glad you asked. Here's something I cut-and-pasted from the w00tstock site:

And we’re pleased to announce our first volley of guests:

And of course Wil, Adam, and Paul and Storm will all be performing,
and there will be a meet and greet after the show.

A: Oh, and also? There are surprise guests and other fun things we haven't told you about.

Q: Yeah, I saw that Surprise guests thing in the cut-and-paste. Jesus, Wheaton.

A: Sorry. My bad. I'm excited because I know who the surprise guests are.

Q: Can we record this show?

A: As long as your recording doesn't interfere with anyone else's enjoyment of the show, yes. Also, we ask that you release whatever you record or photograph under the Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial Share Alike license.

Q: I have a stack of pictures I'd like you to sign after the show. Will you do that?

A: Within reason, we're happy to sign things for you after. I can only speak for myself, but if you bring me a big stack of things, I'm going to tell you to pick one. If I don't do that, it slows down the autograph line (which averages about 2 hours after each show).

Q: What if I wait until the end?

A: The last thing I want to do after performing for three hours and signing for two hours, is sign a big stack of things. I have my limits.

Q: Man, that's a real dick move, Wil Wheaton.

A: I'm sorry you feel that way.

Q: Hey! I'm a different person, and I totally understand!

A: Ah, I see your different font styling. Very nice. Thank you for understanding that I'm a human being with limits! That's awesome.

A: Okay, I think that covers most of the FAQs about w00tstock. If you have more, leave them in comments, and I'll do my best to answer them.

Comic-Con

I'm kind of all over the place at Comic-Con this year. I'm on four different panels across two days, and I'm doing one signing on Friday.

Here's my schedule:

Friday:

11am – 11:45am: signing in the Warner Brothers booth in the exhibitor's hall. I understand that Warner has made some Evil Wil Wheaton posters for me to sign and give away. I'm not sure what their rules are, because I've never signed for a studio like this, but I would expect they'll want me to only sign their stuff.

12:45pm-1:45pm: The Big Bang Theory panel. I'm moderating! I'm going to spend the first few minutes asking the cast and executive producers some questions of my own, then open the floor to fans.

8:45pm: I'm introducing the screening of my episode of Eureka, All The Rage.

Saturday:

11am: I'm on the Leverage panel. Holy shit, I was invited to be on the Leverage panel!

2pm-3pm: I'm on The Guild panel. Axis of Anarchy RULES!

At the moment, that's my entire schedule. There's a small chance I may add one signing on Saturday, but the details of that are being worked out.

You may have noticed that I didn't list the halls where those panels are. That's because I don't know, and I'm counting on someone pointing me in the right direction and telling me, "If something gets in your way … TURN!" I'm sure the program or website can give you the information that you seek.

Okay, that's all for now. If you have on-topic questions, go ahead and ask them here; I'll be here as long as it takes for me to drink this Futuremug of tea, and then back again a little later after I walk my dogs.

Sunday at the 2010 Phoenix Comicon – Super Happy Funtimes, Eureka, Meeting Stan Lee

This is the last of three posts about the 2010 #PHXCC. If you're looking for the other two posts … you know, I'm not going to link them for you, because I think that would insult your intelligence. You know how to find them.

Sunday:

I woke up Sunday feeling like Monty Python lied when they said that 37 wasn't old. I hurt all over the place, especially my legs from dancing on Saturday, and my arms from drumming for close to two hours straight in Rock Band the night before. In fact, two days later, I still feel sore.

I ate breakfast with my friends Amy and Boyan and their friend Brian, and walked over to the convention center.

"Wow, this does not look like a Sunday crowd," Amy said.

"Yeah, this is as crowded as Fridays usually are," I said.

We made our way past the General Lee, KITT, and an amazing Ecto 1 that had the world's littlest Ghostbuster posing in front of it for a picture. I sat down at my table in the vendor's hall for about two hours before John Scalzi and I had Super Happy Fun Times with John And Wil (woah – my fingers just tried to type Whil).

John has a great recap at his blog, which I encourage you to read because it saves me from doing one of those "What Scalzi said" posts. 

… are you still here? John's post has VIDEO of us amusing ourselves and even some of the audience! Go! Go! Come back when it's over.

Okay. Now, aren't you glad you did that?

Anne asked me how that panel went when I got home. She specifically wanted to know how The Thing, which is what we'd all been calling the Unicorn Pegasus Kitten, went over.

"I think it was received pretty much exactly how we'd hoped, with equal parts WTF and FTW."

Hey, I just realized that WTF is just FTW backwards. Think about that for a minute, Internet, and ponder its deeper meaning.

Hey, I just told that to Twitter. The response is about 95%: Mind. Blown. and 5% Hey, stupid, welcome to 2005. To which I reply: "I know, right?" And "So sorry I'm not as on top of things as you are, Mister Internet Guy" as appropriate.

Hey, now let's get back to the post in progress…

I assured Anne that if – if - the Unicorn Pegasus Kitten were to hang in our house in some form, it would be confined to my office (ha! like something this epic can be confined, you foolish mortal woman!) and share space with The Velvet Wesley. 

HA! HA! 'SHARE SPACE' SEE WHAT I DID THERE? HA!

Um. Maybe the second cup of coffee wasn't such a good idea. Let's finish up before this gets too weird:

After John and I finished, I had about 30 minutes to eat food and play HSD Button Men with Boyan (his Cheerleader defeated my Goth Girl 2-1, on account of me not having a d4 in my bag for some reason) before I dropped in on Jaime Paglia's Eureka panel.

Jaime brought a preview from my episode All The Rage with him, and it was the first time the audience or I got to see any of it. I was delighted, and Jaime told all of us that he was really happy with the episode and the way I portrayed Doctor Parrish. He implied that there was a very strong possibility that I'd get to come do more episodes in the back half of the season. I think the audience was almost as excited to learn that as I was.

I stayed on the panel and sort of moderated it until it was over, and then we both had to get to the airport. We went in different cars, because we were going on different airlines, but we ended up in terminals that were connected by corridors and electric walkways. I texted him that if he had time before his flight, I'd buy the beer. He said he only had about 20 minutes, but he was waiting with Felicia Day and Stan Lee, because they were all on the same flight, so why didn't I come over and say hello?

I could have met Stan Lee at Emerald City Comicon this year, but I didn't know if he was awesome or cranky, and I didn't want to chance it. I found out after my window of opportunity had closed that he was awesome, and I've regretted it ever since. I wasn't going to make the same mistake twice.

I did some quick math, figured it would take about 7 minutes for me to get to their gate if I sprinted, and then did that. I felt like I was going to collapse when I got there, but I totally made it.

"Hey! You made it!" Jaime said when I got there, walking the last two gates to get my breathing under control.

"Yeah, I, uh … I did." Well, at least I wasn't gasping.

"This is Stan," Jaime said.

Stan Lee extended his hand, and I shook it. "Thank you for everything you've done," I said.

"What did I do?" He asked.

"You made my childhood awesome," I said. I was totally into Marvel until I discovered DC's New and Prestige format when I was about 14, and decided that Marvel books weren't dark enough for my dark, tortured, totally mature teenage self … but until then, I was all about Hulk and Fantastic Four and Silver Surfer.

"Maybe you should give me some money, then," he said, with a wry grin.

"I did!" I said, "pretty much all of my non-videogame spending was on your comics when I was a kid!"

He laughed a genuine laugh and I forget what happened next because I made Stan Lee smile at me.

Oh, and for all of you "Pics or it didn't happen" people: http://tweetphoto.com/24832844. Seriously.

We all talked for a few minutes, something really awesome happened, and then their flight was called for boarding. I wished them all safe travels, and ran back to my terminal, because I got it into my head that my plane left at 6:45, when it actually boarded at 6:45. I felt pretty stupid, but I had enough time to get a beer after all, which was nice.

The flight home was annoying as hell: loud kids who were old enough to know better with parents who didn't care we were all forced to share a small space together, and a guy next to me who decided that his seat was for him, and my seat was for his elbow … but if that's my biggest complaint of the entire weekend, then I'd say it was a pretty good one.

tl;dr: The con this weekend was great. I had a lot of fun, nothing sucked, and it was wonderful to see so many of my friends. I met a few thousand people, and talked quite a bit with hundreds of my fellow geeks about the stuff that we love. I sold all my books, and most of my pictures, and most importantly, shared some wonderful moments with people I love. I also got to meet Stan Lee, and make him laugh.

Starship Spitzer presents: The Bots of Both Worlds

Many months ago, I went over to the Spitzer Science Center at Caltech to record this episode of Spaceship Spitzer. I played a (hopefully) humorous semi-parody of myself, and I also did the voice for the robot called Irwin. What I didn't know until I saw this yesterday was that Amy Okuda, who plays Tinkerballa on The Guild, was also in this (because we didn't work at the same time.)

Hey guess what? If you have a pair of those red and blue 3D glasses, you can also watch it in 3D, which I understand is all the rage among the damn kids today.

I'm super proud of this video, and I'm honored to be part of something like this, because it makes science accessible to younger people, while making it entertaining for them and for adults. You'll notice that I didn't say "makes science cool," because I believe that science already is cool.

I hope that programs like Starship Spitzer will do for today's children what series like Cosmos and guys like The Star Hustler did for me when I was a kid: get me excited not just about what's out there, but helped me experience the thrill of exploring and understanding it.

Listen, do me a favor: go outside tonight, and look up at the moon. While you do that, consider this inspirational line from last night's Big Bang Theory, (which I'll paraphrase because I can't find it online): Our species went to the moon and left evidence of our visit there, just sixty years after barely achieving flight. Which goes like this: "…there are man-made objects on the moon, put there by a member of a species that only 60 years before had just invented the airplane." (Thanks, karohemd!)

We have to understand our universe. We have to know what's out there. I think we have to keep looking up, and we have to keep exploring, because if we keep screwing up our own planet in the relentless pursuit of even more money for jerks who could don't care about the rest of us, we're going to need someplace to go.

Wil Wheaton’s 2012 Appearance Schedule

This page was last updated on August 13, 2012

 

August

GenCon – August 15-18 – Indianapolis, IN.

Games and dice and more dice.

PAX Prime – August 30 – September 1 – Seattle, WA.

Acquisitions, Incorporated reunites, #Tabletop games are played, and we spend an Awesome Hour together. Please note that I will only be signing for a short time every day in Bandland, so I can actually attend the show.

September

Montreal Comicon – September 14-16 – Montreal, Canada.

My first trip to Montreal in years, and my first appearance at this con.

October – December

Nothing is planned for the rest of the year. See you in 2013!

 

WIL WHEATON dot NET: Version 1.5

Wil WheatonIf you’d like to read my most recent blog posts, head over to WIL WHEATON dot NET: In Exile, my backup blog at Typepad.

Hi there. WWdN is currently undergoing a redesign and some maintenance. If you’d like to know what the status of the redesign is, or see some of the older WWdN files, read this entry.

What in the wide world of sports is going on here?

Way back in September of last year, I attempted to upgrade Movable Type, the blogging software that powers WWdN. I also attempted to move a few thousand entries and hundreds of thousands of comments into a newly-created (and faster) MySQL database.

And, uh, I broke it.

Actually, I didn’t break it. Someone who left a comment broke it when they used a seemingly random string of characters to indicate a break in their comment. Unbeknownst to me and them, it was the same string of characters MT used to indicate the end of an entry and its associated comments. When MT was moving all the data into its new (did I mention faster?) database, it came to that string of characters, and said to itself, “Oh boy! I get to start a new entry now! Let’s see, what’s the TITLE of that entry?”

Look . . . look . . . look . . .

“Uh-oh, there’s no TITLE. I’d better look some more.”

Look . . . look . . . look . . .

“Yeah, it’s still not there. Well, I don’t know what the next entry is TITLEd, so I’m going to just barf all over the server now, and fail. I’m sure one of the Users I heard about in TRON will figure this out and fix it quickly. There’s no way my User, Wil, would stay in some backup blog for six months!”

Ha! Stupid smug software. I’ve been in Exile for nine months! Who’s laughing now, jerk? Who’s your daddy! Say my name, bitch! Yeah!

Uh. Sorry about that.

Off to Exile

I didn’t know how long it would take me to figure out the problem, fix it, and get back here to WWdN, so I set up a backup blog at Typepad, called WIL WHEATON dot NET: In Exile. I intended to hang out there for a couple of weeks while I worked on this blog, but I quickly discovered that WYSIWYG editor at Typepad is great, and since it did all the heavy lifting for me (formatting, marking up links and inserting and modifying images) I had much more time to just take creative ideas and put them into my blog. Around this time, I also got some new writing jobs that actually put money into my pocket and food on my table — jobs writing about poker for CardSquad, writing a column on classic gaming for the AV Club called The Games of our Lives, and editing the geek news at Suicide Girls. In my spare time, I played a lot of Texas Holdem Poker at Poker Stars (where I’m a member of Team PokerStars) and did things with my family. I had one of my first real “grown up” moments the day I realized that there really are only 24 hours in a day, and I had to choose very carefully how I wanted to spend them. You know what I didn’t want to spend them on? hand-coding html and tweaking software settings. It’s sad, and I’ll probably lose a 3d20 geek points for saying it, but those days are way, way behind me. After a day of making freelance deadlines, the last thing I’d want to do is try to repair and redesign my website, and since I was happy in Exile, it just wasn’t that important to me.

The database was eventually repaired, thanks to the efforts of Mike Pusateri and his co-worker Yoshi, who managed to scrape the entire blog for me, and put it into a MT-readable format as an Xmas gift, and the technical support staff at Six Apart, who figured out what the hell was wrong with my dabase in the first place. Repaired database in hand, I found myself with a delimma: return to the now-totally-outated and badly-in-need-of-a-redesign WWdN, or continue using Typepad? Mostly, it was Typepad’s awesome WYSIWYG editor that was keeping me in Exile, but there was also the redesign issue: no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t come up with anything that I really liked.

A few weeks ago, the design problem was unexpectedly solved, when I wrote a series of posts in exile (part one, part two, part three) that helped me clear out a bunch of mental logjams. Seconds before I hit publish on the final one, the way I wanted the redesigned WWdN to look sprung into my mind fully-formed. I grabbed a piece of paper, sketched it out, scanned it, and e-mailed it to my friend, who is working on it at this very moment. I’ve found two great replacements for the WYSIWYG editor I loved so much: ecto, which is a desktop blogging application for Windows and Mac, and Performancing, which is a free Firefox extension that runs on just about any platform in the world, and is optimized for WheatonIX. (In fact, I composed and published this entry using Performancing. Yes, it’s that easy to use.)

So this post represents a bridge between WWdN, and WWdN 2: Electric Boogaloo. All the links you would see on the front page of the old WWdN are in this post, so if you’re new to WWdN you can explore some of the old (and massively outdated) sections.

WWdN will be re-launched very, very soon. Until then, you can use all the nifty information to explore what’s already here. You can also come over to WIL WHEATON dot NET: In Exile to find out where my mind is right now.

Thanks for stopping by.

Old WWdN Content

Nifty WWdN 1.0 graphics: get them before they are retired!

WIL WHEATON DOT NET

WIL WHEATON DOT NET

My first two books

Just A Geek

Dancing Barefoot

Did you read all the way down here? That’s awesome. Thanks! Everything else you want can be found in the archives, or behind your couch. Good luck.

[Hosting provided by Logjamming.com | This entry powered by Performancing]

technorati favorites

Wil Wheaton's Favorites at Technorati

Technorati added  a new service to the already useful search, explore and watchlist functions they offer, which allows users to create a list of their favorite blogs. Though WWdN dropped out of their top 100 when I hosed the database back in September, I was still invited to participate in a "featured favorites" thing, with people like Arianna Huffington and David Sifry.

You can see which blogs I chose here. If you’d like to add WWdN:iX to your own list of favorites, you can use the handy link over on the right side there, where you can also add my blog to several different RSS readers.

All this stuff will be built into the redesign of WWdN, which should be finished and launched shortly before Duke Nuke’Em Forever ships.

attention star trek fans – i’ll be at the grand slam in pasadena next week

I just realized that the Grand Slam convention in Pasadena is coming up in just ten days, running from the 10th until the 12th at the Pasadena Convention center.

I haven’t done any conventions since this show last year, because I didn’t feel like I had any new material, I thought it made sense to take a break from cons, yadda, yadda, yadda, but since I have Just A Geek: The Audio Book, and some advance material on Do You Want Kids With That? I thought it made sense to attend this show.

I also thought it would be a fantastic and unique opportunity to do a Star Trek podcast, with interviews of anyone I could talk to, as well as an audio diary of my experiences at the show.

So I gave Adam at Creation a call, and even though it’s super last minute, he added me to the schedule. I doubt I’ll be doing anything up on stage (everything is booked already) but there’s a chance I may sneak on to introduce someone, or do something cool.

Hope to see some of you there!

talkin’ baseball

Hi, my name is Wil, and I’m a baseball fan.

It all started when I was a little kid, and my dad took me to Dodger Stadium for an afternoon game. I don’t remember much about the game itself (I couldn’t tell you the opposing team, starting pitchers, or final score), but I can close my eyes and instantly hear the din of the crowd, the ever-present Vin Scully coming out of a thousand hand-held radios, and feel the warm summer sun on my face. I can taste the Dodgerdogs and Cracker Jacks, and hear Nancy B. on the Dodger Stadium organ. Yeah, they say you never forget your first time.

As I got older, just watching the game wasn’t enough for me. I needed to take a scorecard to the game, then I needed to take a transistor radio, then I found myself with . . . binoculars.

I knew I had a problem when I couldn’t get tickets for opening day, so I bought hot dogs, beer, cracker jacks, peanuts and red vines, grabbed my booklet of score cards, sat in front of my  television, and pretended that I was in Chavez Ravine.

Luckily, I was able to get some help for my addiction, when Kevin "Dodger Boy" Malone came to Los Angeles, and thoroughly fucked up the team on the field and decimated the farm system. The new Dodger ownership, by turning my beloved Dodger Stadium into a a series of billboards with empty rich jerk seats where the foul territory once was have helped me maintain my sobriety.

I have a bit of baseball methadone, though, and it’s still on TV. Well, on Playstation and Xbox, actually, and this week, I put on my best Rock Star impression, and turned my addition into cash.

First up, a review of MVP06 NCAA Baseball:

Overpaid, underperforming marquee players, steroid scandals, Scott
Boras… Major League Baseball isn’t exactly the classic summer pastime
that Ken Burns made it out to be. So where do fans go when they long
for a simpler time when stadiums were smaller, players didn’t wear
enough body armor to walk straight from the dugout into a joust, and
batters actually hustled to beat out that grounder to short? College,
of course. There, kids who have benefited from a lifetime of screaming
Little League dads finally have their shot at meeting Scott Boras and
becoming an overpaid, underperforming marquee player embroiled in a
steroid scandal.

And to dovetail with that review, I made Champion Baseball the subject of this week’s Games of our Lives:

In 1983, most arcade denizens were looking to live out lives in space,
magic mazes, or other extraordinary realities. Other than lackluster
efforts like Extra Bases, America’s pastime was curiously absent from arcades until Sega released Champion Baseball,
giving Leo Durocher wannabes a chance to manage one of 12 MLB-esque
teams to victory in a pixelated little field where the weather was
always perfect and the stands were always filled to capacity.

Kids today might not like it because: They choose to play as
California, (which is what the Angels were called before they were the
Los Angeles Angels of
we’re-really-in-Orange-County-but-want-Los-Angeles-in-our-name fame),
and find that their pitcher is "Bert" instead of Nolan Ryan. Sorry,
kids, it’s 1983, and licensing for video games is still a decade away.

So, does anyone know when pitchers and catchers report to Spring training? I have, uh, a friend who wants to know.

so my friend won this contest . . .

Remember when I asked you all to go vote for my friend Dawn to be the MySpace Girl of the Week on Attack of the Show? Well, thanks to the Dieboldeqsue voting of WWdN readers and Farkers, she won! Her segment is on Attack of the Show today, and I understand it involves a Poison Ivy costume and a trampoline. I’m not sure if they asked her "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?" but I suspect the average ATOS viewer is more interested girls than crossing the bridge of death, which is why I don’t watch it.

The show airs at 7PM Eastern and Pacific.

Now fetch me a shrubbery!

gravity always wins

Anne plays a lot of Scrabble, and she’s really good. It’s not uncommon for her to score between 270-350 in a two player game, and she hasn’t even mastered the art of sneaking fake words past a challenge, memorizing word lists, or counting how many of a certain letter are left in the bag to work out some complex probability game theory thing.

A few weeks ago, she called me from her friend’s house. I picked up the phone while I poked some coals around the fireplace.

"Hello?" I said.

"Wil! I got venereal!" She shouted.

"WHAT?!" I dropped the fireplace poker onto the hearth.

"Venereal! I got venereal as my first word, and scored –"

"Anne, you can’t just call me up without warning and tell me that you’ve ‘got venereal.’"

She cracked up. "Oh, sorry about that."

"It’s okay," I said. "If you don’t win this game, I’ll be very disappointed."[1]

"I’ll do my best. I have to go. I love you."

"I love you, too. Bye."

Score: Anne – 1 Wil – 0

Today, she called me from her salon and told me about this thing she’d heard about called The Miracle Ball. I guess it’s some pain management, muscle fixing hoo hah that one of her clients swears by. Anne and I are doing the marathon again this year, and I still have pretty constant pain in my right hip that nothing is curing. Massage, acupuncture, yoga, cursing, deals-with-the-devil . . . nothing is working. So Anne suggested that I try the Miracle Ball, which she could also use to help her back and neck.

Before I can run, I need to walk at least thirty minutes a day for the next three weeks or so, which means that I’m not driving myself many places right now. I put on my walking shoes, grabbed my nano, pulled on my ultracool San Andreas jacket, and walked myself over to the bookstore, where I found the Miracle Ball book in the fitness section.

After I paid, I pulled out my cell, and sent her the following text message: i have your miracle balls

I wish she was a farker, so she could send back something like, O RLY?

Alas, she is not, so the score is currently: Anne – 1 Wil – 1 There’s a lot of time left in the game, though, and she still has all her time outs.

This is probably 800% funnier to me than it is to anyone reading this. Welcome to my world.

[1] She went on to win with something like 450 or 490. Insane.