Pretty much all of Comicon was awesome. However, there was one thing that was decidedly not awesome, and though I had initially decided not to talk about it in public, it's bothered me since it happened, so I wrote about it on G+ earlier today.
I'm cross posting it here, though, because it's important to me:
On the way out of the Syfy party on Saturday night, a pretty horrible thing happened. I wasn't going to talk about it in public, but I can't stop thinking about it, and I think this needs to be said.
When I was a Teen Idol*, and I traveled to New York for publicity all the time, it was fairly common for a handful of super weird people to hang out all day in front of my hotel, or in the lobby of my hotel, so they could pounce on me whenever I tried to enter or leave, and demand as many autographs as they could. It was really creepy and awful, and I always hated it. It was more than a little scary. I mean, who in the world spends an entire day sitting in one place waiting for someone? Oh, I know: crazy people.
So, crazy people, pay attention: If you camp out in front of my hotel while I am on location or visiting a city, if you camp out in front of a party I'm attending … basically, if you camp out anywhere so you can shove a stack of 8x10s into my face when I'm trying to enter or leave a location, I'm not going to sign them, and I'm not going to be nice about it.
I refuse to reward or validate that kind of behavior, and I'm done being polite about it.
When we walked out of the SyFy party on Saturday night, a pack of people — probably 12 or 15, I'd guess — appeared out of nowhere, and surrounded me. They shoved pictures into my face, thrust pens at me, and made it so that I couldn't even move. They separated me from my friends and my son, and, quite frankly, terrified me.
Let's stop for a second and think about this: in what kind of world is it acceptable to surround a person you do not know, separate them from the people they are with, and essentially trap them? Maybe in crazy entitled psycho world, but not the world I live in.
I tried to scrawl my signature on a couple of things, just so some of those people would move and let me keep on walking, but whenever someone took something away, something new immediately took its place. Somehow, +Felicia Day saved me. She reached through the mob, grabbed my hand, and said, "Sorry, we have to go meet some of our friends," before the literally pulled me away, to safety.
This is when the mob lost its shit. They yelled at me like I had done something wrong. They called me names, and they booed at me. (Seriously). A woman stormed up next to me and said, "If you don't sign these things for me, I'm going to tell Twitter what an asshole you really are."
I don't respond well to threats like that. Though my instinct was to explode at her, I took a deep breath, looked her square in the eye, turned on my dad voice, and said, "Really? Are you serious? We're done here." I quickened my pace, and for the next two blocks she followed us, screaming and ranting and raving about how she'd waited there for hours, driven all the way from someplace far, and that I basically owed her as a result of her choice. I eventually tuned her out, and I guess she went back to the Syfy party to harass whoever else came out next.
The whole thing was really scary, made me feel like a sideshow freak, and made me really, really angry. I was just trying to walk out of a hotel and go meet up with my friends. I didn't do anything wrong, and I'm not going to apologize forgetting upset about it.
This is important: I realize that just about anyone reading this on my blog isn't one of Those Guys. Please don't think the "you" here refers to, you know, you.
This is also important: When your motto is "don't be a dick," a certain kind of person is vigilantly looking for moments like this when you can be accused of violating your own motto, thereby proving to the entire world that you are, in fact, a giant lying pile of shit. I'm fairly certain that reasonable people can see who the dick was in this situation, and hopefully agree that it was not me. For everyone else: go fuck yourself.**
In Dancing Barefoot, I wrote about signing autographs at conventions:
Over the years, I've learned something from this experience: it's never about the signature. It's about that brief moment, that brief encounter with a Star Trek cast member, that is so important to the fans. That 30 seconds or so of hopefully undivided attention is what they're really paying for, and I always do my best to make sure they get their money's worth. Contrary to popular belief, sitting at a table signing hundreds of autographs for several hours without a break is hard. It's not just mindlessly scrawling my name; It's stopping and listening to the always excited, sometimes shaking, always sweating, sometimes scary dude who wants to know exactly why I did “X” on episode “Y” and would I please sign his picture in silver, because Marina signed it in gold and now he wants the men in silver and the women in gold, and I hated your character and here are 25 reasons why and I expect an answer for each one of them and I'm not leaving until I'm satisfied.
The crazy people who camp out don't care about that brief moment, that brief encounter. The crazy people only care about taking a piece of $Celebrity.person and possibly selling it, or hording it, or … you know, I don't even want to think about where that path leads.But that's why they behave the way they do. It isn't about our work, or about saying "thank you" or "high-five!" or anything about that. It's about entitlement and being crazy, and I will not validate or condone that kind of behavior ever again.
I realize that a crazy person who thinks it's entirely normal and not psycho to camp out in front of a hotel for hours and hours so they can trap a person isn't going to understand why I will not validate that behavior, but I need to make this clear for the future: I'm a person. I am a human being and if you cut me I will bleed. I'm happy to sign things and take pictures with people in appropriate situations, but if some dude violates my personal space or freaks me out, and then gets mad at me when I try to get away from him, I'm not going to do anything beyond telling that person to go fuck himself, and I'm not going to feel bad about it. To paraphrase Neil Gaiman, I am not your bitch.
Finally: In before the inevitable "you're an actor and you chose this so you deserve what you get so suck it up because my life harder than yours because blah blah blah" comment (probably not here, but definitely at G+.)
*LOL.
**See? I don't even feel bad. (Well, maybe a little bit. I need to work harder on it, I suppose.)
Discover more from WIL WHEATON dot NET
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
I, for one, will never understand people that have such a strong sense of entitlement to ANYTHING. Why do people feel that anyone or anything owes them a thing just for simply being here on this planet? It’s confusing.
I’m the person that can’t really come to feel really super comfortable in standing in a line that you (or any other person who has decided, yes, I will meet and talk to people who may likely not all behave graciously from this time to this time) have sanctioned. Ya know? We don’t know each other and yet I’m going to walk up to you and say “Hi, blah blah blah *twitch nervously* blah. We share a birthday. blah blah *awkward pause* I like your blog.” It still seems like I’m being presumptuous! Hell, even commenting here feels presumptuous!
So, these situations where people behave like you actually owe them anything just boggle my wee little brain.
So, I’m really very sorry that there are people in the world that just don’t get it. People that aren’t kind. I really am.
For what it’s worth, I think you were completely in the right to be upset.
You are, to be sure, no one’s bitch. Sorry you had to deal with all that!
I think you actually should behave like a dick to people who step over a line. (And by dick I mean playing up how offended you are by the tiniest discourteousness.) I think it’s totally acceptable that you don’t give these mutant zombies what they want. To be honest, I’m really surprised that you started to sign for them. Why on earth would you give them what they want for attacking you? Although I can understand that you were scared, but I thought, you have been practicing this since you were Wesley. You should really get some escape classes from Felicia Day.
So you hardly need my, or indeed anyone’s, validation for your actions but I say spot on and well played sir. You should be commended for not pulling out Wheaton’s Vicious Cockpunch of Furious Anger quite frankly. It was warranted and people holding Sharpies get -5 to saves, I am told.
ETA: All calls for violence are in fact done for comedic effect…probably.
I agree that you were in the right to be upset and I that I don’t get the camping out for signatures.
I was 2nd in line for a signing you did at PAX one year and felt really weird being in line that early. So I really don’t get out people justify camping out for hours waiting like that.
I guess there are just some people who live in such a delusional state that they believe people on TV aren’t human. It’s pretty sad and I for one believe you acted with all of the dignity of how a person should. That woman got everything she deserved from you and that was absolutely nothing. She didn’t respect you and that puts her in the category of ‘being a dick’.
The funny thing is, last year I saved Felicia from exactly this situation, in exactly the same way.
I completely understand how creepy it probably is when people wait out hotels and stuff, but what about if someone were to see at a bar or pass you on the street, would it be okay to stop and say “hi” or ask for an autograph?
Damn, truly sorry you had to go through that. That kind of behavior boggles my mind. Thank you for sharing though, hopefully that might, I don’t know, maybe mitigate the next case of raving lunatic fan behavior. Thanks for the always interesting posts!
And this right here is the reason I would be way too nervous and shy to approach anyone famous in public and at random. They’re people, too, and maybe they just want to enjoy that cup of coffee in peace or shop for a new shirt without a bunch of assholes interrupting them for the 45th time forcing them to smile and act nice.
I’m sorry this happened to you, Wil. I’m sorry it marred what looked like an entirely wonderful weekend with like-minded folk.
People are crazy. I am always amazed at the number of people in this world that think they are entitled to whatever they want whenever they want it. So narcissistic.
I’d like to kick that woman in the shin.
Kudos to Felicia Day for rescuing a dude in distress. Takes you to parties and fights off mobs. Do friends get any more awesome?
One of the problems is… and this probably isn’t a REAL problem… is that so many other celebrities validate this type of behavior and sometimes even THRIVE on it. Of course, those kinds of folks rarely have a connection to the community that you do, rarely sit for hours signing autographs at cons and events and mostly only have to deal with the crazy people.
That doesn’t make it any better but in the immortal words of the American writer Mark Twain, “yeah”.
Yeah, of course. The two things are fundamentally different.
I’m sorry this happened to you. It does sound creepy and frightening.
As someone who once went to a W00tstock and then stood in line for a good hour+ to get your autograph (not like that is a long time compared to some, I’m sure), I find it offensive that some people decide to break all the rules. You, and others who do awesome things that geeks admire, have a time and a place when you offer to meet fans, and a time when you want privacy like anyone else.
I also agree with what you said about that moment- that’s what matters, and I’ve commented on your entries about it before. It was never, for me, about getting your signature. It was about getting to talk to you and others I’ve met at concerts and plays and cons and getting to actually talk to you because, weird, you’re actually people too.
I said it on G+, and I’ll say it here too. I am a fangrrl, not just of your Star Trek work, but of you, the person who helps move forward the whole geek revolution thing. I look up to you as a person and a celebrity and maybe it’s creepy, but I would never, ever violate the space of ANY celebrity I EVER would have the chance to encounter. That is just wrong on so many levels.
I have had the absolute pleasure of meeting you twice at PAX Prime and having my picture taken with you, while you were at your booth and the timing was appropriate. You make every fan feel special if only for that 30 seconds you mentioned, and we appreciate it so much.
Those other people don’t get it and they can suck off, because your real fans do get you and they do understand that celebrity-Wil isn’t always “on” (and certainly don’t expect you to be).
You have every right to feel as you do and behave as you did, and I think some of your fellow folks in the limelight will be thankful you gave voice to something they must all feel.
Those people who accosted you are no better than the stalkers and paprazzi who torment people and I for one wouldn’t blame you one bit if you gave them the Sean Penn treatment 😉
I’m not going to lie to you, Marge: that really sucks. I’m sorry that happened to you. I really, really am. I’m sorry that we have such a bizarre cultural disconnect between our media and, well, real life, that some people sometimes forget that the person on the other side of the screen/book page/blog post etc. isn’t just a construct put in place to serve their needs but is actually a real live human being. I hope all the good stuff you experienced over the weekend helps supplant that memory.
And FWIW, I’ve been fortunate enough to meet you & have my book signed at PAXEast. When I posted a picture of that meeting, a friend wrote that she had had a teen crush on you(!) & here’s what I said — and sincerely meant: “He’s honestly just a REALLY nice, genuine, smart guy. He took the time to talk and connect with so many geeks this weekend … he made it a special event, for tons of folks, and he was a total class act. Your crush was well-founded.”
So there’s that.
People should be glad they get the chance to meet/see you at the cons. If they want an autograph that badly, they should wait in line, not stalk you. I can’t begin to imagine what it feels like to be known by so many people.
I feel weird writing this, knowing that there’s the slightest chance you may read it. I feel weird when I tweet you or others. But the difference is, I’m not standing outside your window watching you (or am I….) like a psycho.
And I’m seriously kidding on that “or am I” bit. I’ll admire you from afar 🙂
I can definitely identify with the “moment” experience. I ran into Jonathan Frakes in a bookstore in NYC when I was about 15. It took me about 10 minutes and a lot of prodding from my dad to get up the guts to ask for his autograph. He was incredibly nice about it, chatted with me for a minute or two, and signed the only piece of paper I could find (a business card). To this day, even though I have long since lost track of the card, I still remember that he wrote “Dear Bree, Go Boldly! Jonathan Frakes”. Thinking about that still makes me smile 🙂
Hey Wil… Can you get me @FeliciaDay’s autograph? ;P
Wow, that’s like playing Left 4 Dead in real life, where you have to save each other to survive. “You and your friends against 10 million zombies.” In this case, never wander alone, always stay with a fellow survivor.
(And to give some creep factor, now I’m going to tell all my friends that “the annoying child from Star Trek” replied to my comment. 🙂
That’s horrifying. It was very pleasant meeting you at the w00tstock signing, though I’m sure the whole experience was exhausting for all of you after you’d just been performing.
From that experience, I can say that you’re definitely NOT a dick to all the people who patiently queued and briefly talked to you–the ones who played by the rules instead of stalking you. Should stalkers try to insinuate otherwise, the rest of us can set them straight.
Sorry you had to go through that…I hope your overall 2011 Con memories are positive ones.
Long time reader, first time commenter (I think!)
I know stories like this are the kind that really make me nervous around anyone with any sort of celebrity status because I don’t want to come across as some selfish prick.
Like you hear the stories of people stumbling across a celebrity in a restaurant or elsewhere and just straight up asking for an autograph and all I can imagine is how annoying that person would appear. All you’re doing is trying to have a nice time out and instead you’re being hounded for an autograph.
What happened here sounds absolutely horrifying and I can only imagine how scary it must have been to be surrounded by a group of strangers and of course, the last thing you want to do is appear selfish and so you did what you thought was right by signing what you could. It’s so easy to see you’re not in the wrong here.
I am sorry that some fans do this. I am – admittedly – a fangirl. BUT I am willing to bide my time and my money to meet you. You are a person – and all other celebrities are also people. I know this. I have seen this. I do not buy autographs from people whom I know stand and attack celebs. I wait for an opportunity or a signing. I know you all need your space. We all do.
I think you’re very right about it being that contact.
Last year at Dragon*Con I was in a line to a panel, and Robert Beltran came up beside me and asked what the line was for. I answered before I even turned all the way to see who it was, so I could give him a smile (I do that, to people I don’t know and do know) and when I realized, all I could think of to say was “You’re so handsome!” He was smiling, and laughed and said something like “Thank you. We all need to hear that as we get older.”
I was such a fan-girl! But he was so kind, and so *in person* there, standing an inch or so from me, shoulder to shoulder, and it was awesome. Do I regret not getting his autograph? Not a bit. I got the best memory, that’s better than something that would gather dust in my house. (Though, a picture would have been cool!)
Stories like this remind me how nice it is to be a nobody. This seems a symptom of the larger problem we have as a society of reducing other people to something less than human. Whether it’s mocking tragedy, trolling the Internet or ambushing celebrities, all our ugliest behavior occurs when we stop considering each other as real human beings the same as us. I don’t claim to have any real solution to this, of course, other than to try to remind myself and others of this whenever it seems needed.
That said, if for some reason I ever run into you, there’s a good chance it’ll be in a bathroom. It won’t be because I’m stalking you; it’ll be because I have Crohn’s disease and I spend a lot of time in bathrooms.
What those people did was totally inappropriate and out of line. You have every right to be angry over how you were treated and to let people know you were treated badly. People like that give fans a bad name.
Wil, thank you for this. Yes, everyone is a human being, even the ones that get on the TV or other forms of entertainment. One pant leg at a time, and all that. We appreciate you for realizing we are not all That Guy.
Also, to those who make it their life-goal to try and pose situations so someone will look like a hypocrite to their own creed, I pity you. And so does Mr. T.
God, just reading about something like that happening makes me physically ill. I don’t get it, I see video footage of celebrities being practically assaulted by photographers and fans and it makes my skin crawl. I only briefly flirted with the idea of waiting outside a theater after seeing an actor I loved on Broadway but then realized at the end of the night, he just wants to go home and be a regular person and I would too. I would hate to be accosted by someone when I’m trying to do my regular thing (I have actually, but that’s a weird story). I would love to meet my favorite celebrities and get autographs, but I’ll never do it because I’d feel horrible about encroaching on their personal space. You were much nicer than I would have been. I’d either have started swearing a blue streak or curled up in a ball and started crying, depends on which direction my panic attack took me.
Keep up the awesome.
And honestly, you’d be completely justified to knock ’em over and walk right over basically anyone who does such things. I mean, if someone did that to me, someone with no “status” I’d punch them in the face right there. I’d feel pretty bad about it, but also satisfied and justified in doing so. And so would you.
That is a truly unfortunate turn of events, and I find that level of entitled ignorance astounding. I’m sorry that happened to you at what was an otherwise excellent event.
Living here in Edmonton, AB, Canada, I have occasionally seen Nathan Fillion walking the streets, or hanging out with friends in a pub. But I’ve never gone to speak to him, because it just didn’t seem like the thing to do, you know? Edmonton is his hometown, and I’d like to believe that he comes home to get away from that part of his life for a bit. His need for downtime far outweighs my need for a bit of friendly contact, especially when there are options like conventions out there.
And I have to say, when I came by your signing table at Gen Con last year you were absolutely friendly, and gave me a great tip about picking up the Dragon Age tabletop RPG. That experience far exceeded anything some idoit is going to get by ambushing you in your off-hours.
Anyway, glad you and your son came out safe, and kudos to the indomitable Felicia Day.
Hey Wil…
I read your blog. I subscribe to your twitter feed. But, I do these things because I’m interested in what you have to say _based_upon_what_it_is_you_say.
You and I? We could have beers. Not because you’re Wil Weaton™, but because your this guy named Wil, who is about the same age as me, thinks a lot like me, and has kids about the same age who have pooped/peed on him once in life. Wil Weaton™ is very impressive and I admire that.
But, if we ever run into you on the streets, I’ll say “hi.” I might even chat you up for a sec if it seems you have the time. (My wife will be numb, but that’s her.) I’ll probably talk about your kids. And, well, that will be it.
See, I get that you are a human being. Oh, I’m a fan of your work, no doubt. But, above all that, I’m a fan of the man that you are. The father. The husband.
Where am I going?. There are a whole bunch of us “regular” folk out there, too. People who have been pooped on. 😉 So, you know, you’re not the crazy one. It’s nice to be told that now and then.
(Due to a past life, I’ve been chased for autographs, etc, too. I thought I’d like it until it happened. Then, I was scared.)
I have a relatively famous friend and things like that happen all the time. I’m normally the one to pull her away or create a distraction to help her.
You’re human and should be treated as such. That should be respected.
It’s a shame that that happened to you at Con. You’re brilliant, fuck douchebags.
It bothers me that those people do that, especially because they actually could go to Comic-Con and have a chance to get your autograph there.
I was stuck in shitty rainy Holland wishing I was there to even just see you guys from a distance.
Ok, I’ve done some crazy shit when it comes to my favorite bands. Queued outside for like 24 hours to be front row of a concert that was sold out in like an hour. Well, I learned from that experience that that was the dumbest thing ever and I wil never do it again.
So no worries, I won’t come stalking you for an autograph if I do ever get the chance to go to such a major event where all my other favorite famous people come. The ones not from Korea. 😛
Thing is though that I kinda forgot how bothersome this can be for the person being ‘stalked’. In my fandom Kpop it’s kind of normal to go crazy over your idol, so normal we even got a name for it. “Stan” or “Stanning”. It’s kinda like how Bieber can’t walk the streets, either. Well, same thing in Korea but with every single person that is famous.
It’s a good thing you posted this, because I opened my eyes and made me realize how fucked up my fandom actually is. Kpop is crazy. xD
I’m so sorry this happened. I’m really completely aghast at the behavior of those people.
As I just said on twitter (i’m @passioncat there): @wilw is a person first, celebrity second. Your fandom of any celebrity shouldn’t ever overlook or violate their personhood.
The signature for me, as I’m sure it is for you, is more of a memento of the conversation than the goal of waiting in line in the first place. I’ve actually waited in autograph lines for people I’ve actually gotten signatures from already and given the autographs to friends who couldn’t be there, just to have a chat with someone who really respects their fans.
Thank you, Wil. Thank you for being wonderful and giving your time to me, the one time I got to meet you. We met at ECCC and it was great. Thank you for taking to time to shake my hand, talk with me and personalize my books. You made my day and I’ll never forget it.
For someone like you, generous and giving to your fans, it is terrible that you had to experience such rude behavior. I have to wonder if the crazies that accosted you were even fans at all.
It’s not even about you being a dick at this point. It’s about clear boundaries, and being really clear about them. I’m glad you’ve written this up. Not that it will make a difference to the real crazy fans out there, but maybe it will to someone who’s on the fence… who isn’t sure if something’s appropriate or not. The crazy fans aren’t just ruining the cons for you – they’re ruining it for everyone. If someone could come up with a solution for them? He/She’d be my personal hero forever.
Over the weekend I saw a tweet from Seth Green asking fans not to holler out his name if they see/recognize him so that he could spend time on the floor without being mobbed. And I know Nathan Fillion’s often mentioned that a nod and a little “Captain” is a great way to acknowledge him without making a scene. I really appreciate that sort of knowledge, because, yes, as a fan, I *do* want to thank you for your work, to have a little moment where I can tell you that what you do has meant a lot to me. If I can do that with a wink and a nod… well, then I think everyone wins.
You know, I once saw William Shatner shopping at a bookstore in NY while a convention was in town and…totally left him alone. I figured, he probably doesn’t want to be mobbed by fangirls while shopping like a normal person. lol
I’ll never understand the zealots who camp and lay in wait to ambush people they idolize. It’s shameful honestly. I’m glad Felicia was able to save you from that mess.
Yeah, Felicia had some free time last year right before the Whedon/Abrams panel so we went out and about outside the Con. Some were very gracious, while others placed themselves between her and our destinations. I was there and did not mind being the a-hole that pulled her away, otherwise, who knows what could have happened. Unfortunately, you really need some sort of buddy system, being in the public eye as you are, when at these things.
I’m really, really sorry that there are people out there that do this sort of thing. I would have been one of many fans that would support you no matter how mean or nasty you would have been to these leeches. Just pick them off Wil, they’re not worth your attention.
It makes me very sad and it also stops me from putting a terrible amount of effort into meeting anyone famous. Even as a teen I was horrified at screaming fans. It makes my stomach hurt when I see people treating stars (movie, music, tv, tv chefs, whatever)as if they’re anything more than human. Yea, I got a little emotional at Pax, but I’m an emotional and somewhat dramatic person, I also go over it in about 30 seconds.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Twitter and how fans treat stars of every ilk, what saddens me is how much attention the haters and weirdos get. It’s NEGATIVE attention and they FEED off it. I don’t understand that at all, I would be mortified if I offended someone I looked up to or admired.
The sense of entitlement that those people had, give real fans a bad name.
Sure, just let me find out where I'm supposed to set up my campsite, first.
Very well said. 🙂
Sorry you had to endure such a horrible experience Wil.
It’s positive you chose to write about it and make your feelings clear. It is natural to get upset about such an experience – something which many of us have no inkling what it feels like – though you shouldn’t let it eat at you too much, simply because some of the people who do the celebrity stalking thing get a rise out of the fact that they have made you (of all people) lose your cool.
Have a great week.
H
Wil, I’m sorry that happened to you. I’ve never understood that behavior. And I’m hoping it didn’t scare the living daylights out of your son. Frankly, I’m amazed at the amount of restraint you showed. If someone were to separate me from my kid, TMZ and that crowd be damned….the claws would have come out.
I’m glad you wrote about this. It’s important for these people to see comments like this and realize they’re acting crazy. Also, I believe when companies like SyFy host events like the party you attended they should be responsible for making sure these things don’t happen. Ropes, security, and transportation so you folks can get the hell out and get on with your evening would make sense. I’m not talking red carpets and limousines, but a waiting taxi and a large bulky man in a dark suit would probably be appropriate. There are crazy people out there who will do crazy things, and it’s the responsibility of an event coordinator and sponsor to try and prevent guests from harm. My 2 dinar.
I’m sorry you had to go through this, and I’m glad you spoke up. All of us who are fans understand how exciting it can be to finally meet a star you’ve admired for a long time, but despite this we all should remember that actors, musicians, writers and others simply are PEOPLE like everyone else. They deserve respect, too.
I can’t imagine myself meeting any of my idols with anything but politeness and gratitude, but some people tend to think they sort of ‘own’ them and have the ‘right’ to demand. Just because that someone is ‘used to it’ or ‘knows what they signed up for’. This may be true to some extent, but it still doesn’t give anybody the right to treat people disrespectfully or even outright freak them out.
It’s not okay, and it makes me ashamed so often, every time I hear stories like this, because I’d hate to be put into the same category as those loons simply for the fact that I am a fan too. It’s those kinds of “fans” fault when actors don’t like coming to conventions anymore, or when there are suddenly new policies introduced during autograph sessions and photo ops like no touching, not even a handshake or laying an arm around the shoulder for the photo, just because some idiot fan decided to violate a star’s personal space in inappropriate ways. Behaviour like this ruins everything for those of us who are ‘proper’ fans and know some goddamn manners, and for the stars as well who, sadly, get reluctant to interact with fans after such experiences – but who can blame them?
This proves again that common sense is really, sadly, not that common at all.
Wil, if it makes you feel any better, most of those people were most likely not fans (not even crazy ones), but professional autograph hounds. They are rude and obnoxious and you shouldn’t spend one second feeling guilty that you walked away from them without signing.
I’ve volunteered for the Paley Festival here in L.A. for ten years now, and I know most of those folks by sight because they show up for every event with stacks of pictures to get signed to sell. I hate those people. For exactly the reason you point out above. Fans getting autographs isn’t about getting an autograph, it’s about the interaction. And those people take away the time and opportunity for genuine fans to have that moment. And by stalking people like they did to you, they make actors less willing to do autographs at all. I actually wish more actors would do what you did and not validate their behavior. Bravo.
You see, I wouldn’t even do that because you’d be busy shopping or whatever and I as someone who you don’t know (although there’s only one degree of separation between us) have no right to invade your privacy. The most I’d manage would be to say Hi or maybe do the PAX salute which is something you can choose to ignore or acknowledge.
As you’re mostly in North America and I’m in the UK, you’d be safe from even that, unless you decide to bring w00tstock to the UK at some point, which would be all kinds of awesome.