rest in peace, bob newhart

When I worked on Big Bang Theory, each episode involved a few days of rehearsal before we did camera blocking and the actual taping in front of the audience. Most actors go to our dressing rooms during breaks to relax, learn lines, grab a nap, and so on. But when I worked there, if I wasn’t in a scene, I’d stay on the stage and watch the other actors work. It was like getting to sit in on an advanced acting class, without ever having to stand up in front of the other students. I learned so much from that, I am a more fully-equipped performer than I would otherwise be, certainly when it comes to comedy.

When I had the extraordinary privilege of working in the same episodes as Bob Newhart, I stayed on the stage the whole time, just to watch him work. I mean, how could I not? He made it all look so easy, and holy shit he was so funny, even more than you think.

One day, he and I ended up sitting next to each other during a break in production. In the industry, we call it “taking a five” or “a quick ten” or something like that. Just a little break for everyone to catch their breaths. A couple of the writers were there, I think, and maybe one or two other actors. And we all sat there, while Bob Newhart told stories about his life and career. It was amazing. This legend, just talking to us like it was no big deal, sharing these incredible experiences with us. I knew then that I would never forget it, that I would cherish that experience for the rest of my life.

I just read the news that Bob Newhart passed away at 94, and this memory has come back to me, like it was yesterday.

He didn’t need to be kind. He didn’t need to tell us these stories. He didn’t owe us any of his time. And yet he did, and he loved it. Because he chose to do all those things, I have a gift that Bob Newhart gave me. I haven’t opened it in a while, but I took it out today, and I was grateful.

Rest well, Bob.

May his memory be a blessing.

look! an old man is talking again!

On my Tumblr thingy, someone asked:

I know it’s been a bit since you were in school, but as someone who is about to go to university, do you have any tips?

I wanted to share my reply:

It is such a huge privilege when someone your age asks an Old like me for advice. When I was young, I thought dudes in their 50s were lame and had nothing to offer. Now that I’m one of those dudes, I understand what a gift it is when you ask me to share my experience. I hope this helps you a little bit.

Make time to meet your professors during their office hours.

You don’t have to go have a deep conversation, just introduce yourself, tell them which class you are in, and thank them for their time.

You’re doing this because there will be a time in your future when you need an extra day for something, or a little extra help or attention, or something like that. When you go to talk to your professor about that, it won’t be the first time you’ve met them, and that will make a difference.

That’s on an academic level. On a personal level, you’re going to spend a LOT of the next few years figuring out who you are, what your values are, and how you want to live your life. Most of us try to be someone profoundly different from who we are, in our first year or two, because we’re on our own and trying out what it feels like to be an adult. The thing I want you to just remember while you do that is: you know who your are in your heart, and if you try to not be that person, you will draw people to you who don’t like *you* as much as they like who you are pretending to be.

It’s a long way of saying “be true to yourself. Know what your values are and live them consistently, so you find other people who share them.”

Finally, the advice I give everyone who asks me questions like yours:

Choose to be kind.

Choose to be honest.

Choose to be honorable.

Choose to do your best and understand that your best will vary from day to day. Don’t judge yourself when your best on Monday is not the same as it was last Thursday. Just do your best, consistently.

You’re at the beginning of a really great time in your life. I hope you get everything you want out of it, enjoy learning, and make life long friends.

Six unelected people forcing their unpopular christian nationalist agenda on a population of three hundred and forty million is not a Democracy. It is tyranny.

Josh Marshall writes:

Donald Trump threatens the entire existence of the American republic. He is able to do this because the Supreme Court he created is assisting him in doing so. It is a corrupt Court – on which more later. It overturned a central right for half of our population. It routinely mixes and matches rationales, jurisprudences, logics to arrive at the end point of transforming America into their extremist vision. We’ve heard that yesterday’s decision was a terrible decision, an extremist decision, that it changes the American experiment fundamentally. No disagreement with any of those points. Most importantly, in my mind, it’s a fake decision. Yes, it will now be controlling within the federal courts. But it doesn’t change the constitution any more than a foreign army occupying New England would make Massachusetts no longer part of the United States. That may seem like a jarring analogy. But it’s the only kind that allows us to properly view and react to this Supreme Court.
The rationale for the decision yesterday has literally no basis whatsoever in the US constitution.

Josh is correct, but I don’t think it matters. This corrupt, activist, fascist SCOTUS majority does not care that they just made up law out of whole cloth; they’ve been doing it for years. These six people who make up the majority have decided that the Constitution, 250 years of precedent, popular opinion, and the foundational ideas that have made America what it is since 1787 are what they say they are, fact, history, the will of the people and precedent be damned.

I live in a country of three hundred and forty million people.

In this country, six unelected christian nationalists, five of whom were placed on the court by presidents who lost the popular vote, all of whom are opposed by SEVENTY PERCENT of the population, are making up laws out of whole cloth because their power is unchecked. A country that allows six people to impose their regressive authoritarianism on an entire population is not a free country. It is not a Democracy.

America has not been attacked like this since 9/11. Six unelected people forcing their christian nationalist agenda on a population of three hundred and forty million is not a Democracy. It is tyranny.

In the pointless parlor game of “What can Joe Biden Do, Now That He’s Above The Law” (as if he ever would), everyone is missing the central message I took from yesterday’s ruling: SCOTUS is going to install Trump as dictator for life, by any means necessary. Somehow, after he loses the popular vote again, and after he’s even lost the Electoral College again, these six Fascists will invent a reason to overturn the will of the electorate, again, even if they have to invent law to do so. Every single one of their rulings this term have been part of their coup. Now, just line them all up and connect the dots. Don’t leave out Project 2025 or Agenda 47.

This is terrifying. We barely survived four years of Trump, when there were at least some guardrails around him. SCOTUS just tore those down and turned them to ash. I am terrified that we are four months away from the likely end of what passes for freedom in America, and once it’s gone, I doubt it is coming back in my lifetime.