Schism

“Individually we can get angry. Together we can, and will, make a diference.”
I wrote those words recently, hoping to rally and inspire people to action.
I was talking about the rapid erosion of our free speech and parody rights on the internet, but that phrase applies to any movement, really.
One voice is easily ignored or silenced, but when other people add their voices to yours, you become a chorus not easily ignored.
It turns out that a lot of people got angry that I wouldn’t be attending the 15th anniversary of TNG celebration next month. It turns out that those voices joined together in emails, phone calls, internet postings and FAXes. It turns out that those voices became a chorus not easily ignored.
Thursday afternoon, I had a message on my machine from Adam Malin, president of Creation. He told me that he’d been “flooded” with emails, phone calls and FAXes. He said he’d read the internet postings, and he wanted to talk with me. He told me that he felt terrible, sick, and was very upset that I felt the way that I did. He was apologetic, and hoped I’d call him back so we could speak directly and if nothing else, clear the air.
When I set the phone down in it’s cradle, I was surprised to feel my hands shaking.
I was, quite honestly, stunned. Shocked. A phone call from a lawyer I would have expected. An angry phone call, maybe, given the rage people were expressing on message boards at my own site and elsewhere. But a personal, cordial, apologetic call? I just didn’t think it would happen.
I didn’t have a chance to call him back until yesterday, during my lunch hour at work. See, we’ve been busting our asses at Arena to pull together this HALO National Championship event, and yesterday was the culmination of weeks of 12 hour days, of hundreds if not thousands of individual hours of work.
So lunch comes, and I phoned him.
I apologized for not calling him back right away. I explain to him that we’re working on this special, and it’s maxed out my internal CPU.
Before I can say anything, he apologizes again for not talking to me directly, and letting his underlings deal with me instead.
He tells me that he has never thought of me as “not part of the family.”
I tell him that I have been given the impression from everyone at Creation, even the people with whom I am friends, that there are “levels,” and it (rightly) goes: Captains, Data, everyone else…then there was me.
I tell him that I’ve felt marginalized, and treated like my contributions to Trek weren’t important to him, Creation, the fans, or Paramount.
He apologizes again, tells me again that he doesn’t feel that way. Tells me that he wanted to make it right. He wants to have me at that convention.
I am stricken by how genuine he seems. I am beginning to feel badly for not going over the heads of his employees and speaking directly to him, myself.
I also notice something that is a new feeling to me, as far as Star Trek goes: I’m being treated like an adult. Treated with respect, spoken to fotrhrightly and candidly.
This may seem like an overstatement of the glaringly obvious, but even though I am thirty years old, I still feel like I’m “the kid” where Trek is concerned. Not feeling that way is something new to me, and I’m not sure how to deal with it.
Adam tells me that he has heard great things about my sketch group. He’s heard that they are fabulous, and the fans really love the show we do. He tells me that he wants to hire them for the show, wants me to speak at the show, and he really wants to make it work out.
I tell him that there wasn’t time to get the group together now, and produce a quality show. He is really upset about that. He asks me if I’d be willing to get my group together for Grand Slam 2003.
I notice that we’re having a cordial, comfortable conversation. It’s like we’ve both been stung. Me by the posture taken during the previous negotiation, and him by the vitriolic rebuke from the fans. He seems to genuinely feel badly that my feelings were so hurt, and I get the palpable impression that he wants to make things right.
He asked me again if I’d be willing to do the show for a very reasonable fee, just a little bit below what I was asking for before negotiations broke down last month.
I am immdediately torn.
I think about this thing that someone said in the comments yesterday: “If you turn your back on Trek one more time, I’m buying you a revolving door.”
I think hard about that. It burns inside me.
I dont know what to do.
On the one hand, I want Trek behind me.
On the other hand, it will never be behind me no matter what, because, let’s face it: Trek was and is HUGE. Bigger than me. Bigger than I will ever be in my (stalled and slowing) acting career.
After I’d gotten the first phone call from Adam, I talked it over with Travis (from Arena) who is a very good friend of mine. Knows me very, very well.
Told him I’m having mixed feelings about it. I can think of reasons to do the show, and reasons to not do the show.
He asked me why I didn’t want to do it.
I gave him some reasons, pro and con.
He asked me if I was happy writing.
I told him I was.
He asked me if I liked being on stage.
I told him that I did.
He asked me why I could possibly not want to be onstage in front of people who want to like me, and read my work to the same. He reminded me of the sketch shows we’ve done together at conventions, and how we have always felt great afterwards.
He asks me again why I can’t embrace Star Trek as something wonderful that I was part of, and at the same time continue to move forward as an actor and writer.
I couldn’t answer him.
Pride? Fear?
I don’t fucking know.
The people on the ‘net have rallied around me about this. The fans have raged at Creation, and Creation listened.
But there’s that revolving door. I’m stuck in it, big time.
I think of this email I got where a guy said he felt like I was trying to convince myself that it is okay to be booted from Star Trek things. He’s right.
I think of a comment where a guy criticizes me for being so angst-ridden about Star Trek, accuses me of being full of shit, says he can see right through me.
He has a point too. I meant what I said about being cut from the film. But having the safety bubble burst? Well, I’m still standing in it’s remains, hoping I can find a way to refill it, just in case. Setting Wesley free, embracing a sense of freedom? I meant that, as well.
I feel like I have grown older, and changed. But I feel unfulfilled, unsure, and I know that the last few months of entries here have focused on that. Maybe I’m giving way too much weight to the comment of one random person who didn’t even have the courage to put an email address with the anonymous comment. For all I know I could be biting on the biggest troll ever.
But there is truth to what that anonymous poster said. I’m torn. I am caught in a revolving door, and I don’t know what will happen, and I am filled with angst, and that feeling is burning inside of me, keeping me awake at night, distracting me every minute of every day. It’s burning in me so fiercely, so hot and insistent, that I have lost perspective. I can’t make objective decisions and weigh the pros and cons effectively.
So I seek counsel from some very good friends of mine. Some people who I really trust and respect. I write to them what I’ve written above, with the following pros and cons:
Pros:

  • Fans will be ecstatic that Creation listened, that they fought for me and won.
  • Fans will be happy to see me in person.
  • I’ll earn money for my family and be able to perform what I love to do for an audience who *FINALLY* wants to like me.

Cons:

  • That revolving door feeling, and the fear of a massive backlash from…well, I’m not sure who, but backlash nevertheless.

It seems pretty slam-dunk, right? I should do the show and feel great about it. But it’s not that easy for me. I am extremely conflicted, until I get the following responses:
“This could not be easier, but that’s really because I’m not you.
You don’t have a choice, man. When you just had a few little tiny hairs, something in you nailed that part of the “kid that was to be forever hated”(tm).
I honestly believe that you were hated because everyone wanted to be like you and because you were a fucking kid in an adult world and there was a new crowd suddenly attracted–nevermind that we’ve got the black guy with the hairclip on his eyes and a Klingon on the ship…not to mention that fucking hot Martina bitch.
No, you were the biggest oddball, and you didn’t have a clue what was happening to you, no matter how fucking smart you were–and Wil, you’re no dumb guy.
Hell, you know I know that you’re a million times harder on yourself than anyone else could be in a single day.
You’ve managed to take all the asshole things you did when you were younger and attempt to make right on them.
Again, if you’re at all like me, you probably get irate if you catch yourself littering because of the Karma Train that’ll come back to hit you if you cause some old guy somewhere some extra effort to clean up your mess, even if it’s his job.
Damn, man. I know what you’re doing…I do it, too.
So, you think you’d be compromising or something if you went and changed your mind and went back to the show.
I don’t. You’re going to enjoy it. People like you.
You looked in the face of a thousand-million internetters and said, “Hey, I’m a fucking human like you, I’ve been a dick, it’s not right, this is what I did and this is what I think now. Sorry; won’t happen again.”
People like you, man. In fact, you’re probably not even capitalizing off of all the Internet Momentum(tm) you’ve gained in the past year. Shit, Wil, people all over the place NOW LIKE YOU. Let’s face it, you’ve only gotten limited access to those auditions, but how many magazines, newspapers, tv shows, etc. have you been on because you’re a fucking computer geek-boy now?
You want my point-blank, in-your-fucking-face opinion right now?
Too bad, I’m giving it to you anyway.
For starters, go there.
Go there in a big fucking “in your face, but I’m still just lil ol’ Wil” way. Have the fucking time of your life–do it FOR YOU for the fans, not for the fans. These people want to see you–and even if they say something negative, just laugh it off like water on a duck and say, “Cool, but you know, you really don’t know me” and know that you’ve won in that statement alone.
Then, Mr. Man, I think you need to start doing something to have the voices of these hundreds of thousands of souls who, together, are not only fucking bright when they’re not trolling, but who are also strong-minded and very likely to do something about making you an actor.
???
Yeah. You’ve got a fucking posse, man.
Truer words could not be said. Now, what does it fucking take to get all of these people together to say in a single voice, “We Want Wil” and have them get you back on screen?
I don’t have the answer there, but I guarantee you that I’m going to be the first person to try and figure it out…people want to see you. People are rooting for you all over the place and you don’t even know it because you’ve let yourself become accustomed to not being quite so famous.
But, dammit, man, you’re the movie-star guy that’s “just like me…holy shit!” and you’re an underdog. You’re the guy that people want to see get some momentum behind and get to the top–and then remember each and every one of them on the way up and once you get there, because, no one does that. Everyone forgets that one little geek that didn’t have to show up at the con and ask for your autograph…who made it there for you and saved money to go.
If you forget him, he’ll take you down as quickly as he put you up there, and you know that very well, my friend. They taught you that already.
You’re a blessed man. Don’t forget that. I’ll never be on a G4 network or on a game show, and that’s cool, but believe me, I’d want to do it in a heartbeat. You, on the other hand, can do it with your eyes closed–and that’s true. G4 is your stepping stone, in case you hadn’t noticed that just yet.
Let me wrap up with something that Michael Jordan once said: “Every night when I go out on the court, I think about that father and son out there who are seeing me play basketball–and that’s the only reason they’re here. This might just be their only chance. Sometimes, I even wish I could trade places with them because of the great feeling–the great moment this is for them. Every night when I go out on the court, I play my best…for them.”
So, get your black-ass out on the court. Hit the fucking circuits and get busy busy busy, man. No fucking infomercial is going to be your death, so get that fucking preconceived notion out of your head and put the rubber to the road.
Dunno; maybe you’ll be pissed at some of this, but the truth is, I don’t care about that. I care about the fact that you SEEM to be letting some of your potential wash-away from you, and you’re too good for that.
Look, I don’t know all that goes on, so that obviously makes me very uninformed, but if this is my opinion of you, then imagine what other people must feel if they’re your fans? You’ve become an icon all over again, believe it or not.”

Another friend said:
“I just talked to [his wife, who is very wise] about it, who had this to say:
First off, she thinks you should do it (for reasons I’ll get into in a second).
But the big thing (again, still her talking) is that you should do this for you.
Whatever you decide, right now, it’s gotta be for you, and not because X amount of people will judge you for doing it or not doing it.
If you feel it’s right for you, and will benefit your family, and your writing, and gain some recognition for you, AND you’ll get to see some old Trek buddies again, and that’s what you want, then you gotta do that thing.
But don’t do it if you now feel pressured by the fans to do it.
And don’t NOT do it because you’re afraid of what the fans will think.
Whatever you do, do it because you, you personally need to.
Okay, here’s where I start talking.
To put this in some perspective, I remember a time when Shatner wouldn’t do the con thing. There was a period between the cancellation of the series and the first movie where he wouldn’t even mention Star Trek in interviews (which was actually kind of surreal).
That said, he came back, did the movies and lives very well off of them and off of the additional fame from a new audience not as familiar with the series.
Because I think there comes a point where you have to acknowledge that This Thing You Did Back When is a part of you that’s always going to be there. It’s like Sue Olson (the actress who played Cindy Brady) once said–you have to accept that people will always think of you as that character, because only then can you really move on.
Once you accept that, the audience accepts you…and paradoxically, on your own terms.
See, this whole “Turn Your Back On Trek” thing, if you let thatget to you…how do I put this?
If you don’t do it because you have to Turn Your Back On Trek, well, then you’re not really turning your back on Trek–you’re still letting the Trek thing dictate what you do.
And, while we’re putting our cards on the table, here, I think that you shouldn’t look at not turning your back on Trek and finding your own voice as being mutually exclusive. As a former convention-goer, the Trek (or otherwise) speakers who I thought were the coolest were the ones who accepted that Trek was the reason they were there and why we were there, as opposed to the guys who seemed weirded out or perplexed that anyone gave a shit.
Not that you’d be that way–I’m talking about an initial attitude going in, not the handling of the experience from that point on.
As far as you feeling that you’re renegging on what you said in your post…and here’s some perspective:
The situation is different now.
It’s not that they called you, snubbed you, and you’re going back anyway to eat shit for the peanuts.
It’s that they contacted you, snubbed you initially, then realized they misjudged your appeal (and ability to bring in a LOT of new people) and finally were willing to meet you on terms you could accept.
I’m not gonna lie and say that some people won’t be assholes and call sour grapes on you for “singing a different tune.”
Expect it. I know you are.
You’ve been down this path before. We all know you have.
I mean, it’s great publicity for the website, and for Arena, and for you. You will have an ability to connect with the fans again–but this time it’ll be a little different, because you’re probably going to see more people you know you from the site–and Malin knows that.”

Mixed in with all of this, I got an email from a really nice woman who organized fans to share their outrage about this. Creation reverses themselves … PLEASE do go, otherwise IMO Creation will win, as they can say you turned THEM down after they met your (original) terms or soemthing like that. Then promote the hell out of the convention on your website. Perhaps if Creation and the others see how powerful you and your website is, they just MIGHT sit up and take notice, and I’m not just talking about conventions here, but perhaps it might help you in other ways (as yet unseen) as well.
I’m calling for a campaign here to do right by you … ’cause I think it stinks. NO one messes with the Wil Wheaton, or they’ll find that they have the ‘Possee’ as you call us, to contend with, and I suspect we are a much MORE powerful together, than Creation realizes.
I’m doing this for you, cause I think you are a neat guy … but also mostly because, remember, I’ve been a Trekkie longer than you’ve been around (before you were born), and this is now really got me STEAMED how on their High Horse that Creation has gotten of late.”

So. I think long and hard about these things, and still I feel heavily conflicted.
I revisit those pros and cons, and think to myself:
I’d love to have a chance to read some of my stuff for an audience who would really “get” it.
I’d love to go in front of fans who, for the first time EVER **LIKE** me.
But that revolving door is spinning, and I don’t know how I can face the people who said “Good for you! Leave Star Trek behind you forver!”
Well, right now, the absolute truth is, as my friend said:
“Because I think there comes a point where you have to acknowledge that This Thing You Did Back When is a part of you that’s always going to be there. It’s like Sue Olson (the actress who played Cindy Brady) once said–you have to accept that people will always think of you as that character, because only then can you really move on. “
That’s the freedom I was referring to in the last part of The Wesley Dialogues.
“If you don’t do it because you have to Turn Your Back On Trek, well, then you’re not really turning your back on Trek–you’re still letting the Trek thing dictate what you do… you shouldn’t look at not turning your back on Trek and finding your own voice as being mutually exclusive.”
Well, I’m going to wrestle with that last one for awhile, I think, and WWDN readers can expect more angst in the months to come. Sorry, it’s just part of the process. There are hundreds of great weblogs to read, and lots of pretty trees to look at outside if you’d rather not read that stuff here.
Well, this is 9 pages now, so I think it’s time to get back to the point:
Adam and I talk.
It is a good, long, honest, respectful talk.
We clear the air.
He tells me that his profit margin on the Vegas show was not several million dollars. He tells me that it was very, very slim, relative to his investment, which was nearly half a million dollars.
He tells me that he didn’t want me at the Grand Slam on stage because he wanted to hold off until the 15th show. He thought it would be cooler if he waited to have me come on then.
He tells me that he had no idea about my website, or about how the fans felt about me now.
He asks me if I’d reconsider.
I reconsider. I replay all those emails in my head, I balance the pros and cons, and I say to him,
“Adam. I am really conflicted about this. I feel like each time I do a Star Trek event, it’s…well, it’s not necessarily a step backwards, but it certainly isn’t a step forwards, but I feel like I should listen to the voice of the fans. We should all listen to the voice of the fans, because that voice has been increasingly silenced over the last decade.
I love to perform, and I would like to give something back to the fans. I would love to attend the event, and be part of the celebration, but I’d also like to share some of my writing with the fans. Would you be able to put me in an evening spot, so I can read somet things that I’ve written?”
“Is it funny?” He asks me.
“It’s funny, it’s sad, it’s bittersweet…it’s really a reflection of the person I am, and people seem to respond to it.”
“Can I book your comedy group for Grand Slam in 2003?”
“Yes. I’d love to bring my guys out. We love to perform.”
We talk about fees, and we agree on a very fair fee, which is right on par with the rest of the actors.
I will do a question and answer session at the convention, and I will bring selections of my writing, and read them for the audience during and evening program.
I ask him for one more thing. I tell him that I have more in common with the fans now than I do with the actors, and I keep hearing how the fans are getting the in-person-autograph shaft these days.
I want him to put my autograph table in an area where I can sit for a few hours, so all the fans can get their stuff signed, so I can talk with people who are so inclined.
He tells me that he’d really like that. Many actors just won’t do that, and he thinks it would be great.
I feel very good about this conversation, and I feel very excited to be part of this celebration.
Resolution? It’s a long ways off. That’s why they call it “angst.”
But there is something wonderful buried in all of this:
I doubt I would have gotten this phone call if there hadn’t been such a loud and immediate response from the fans.
You spoke up on my, and your, behalf, and your voice was heard.
Think about that for a moment.
Your voice was heard. You made a difference. Creation is the 800 pound gorilla of conventions. They don’t have to listen to anyone.
But they listened to you. They listened to us.
That, my friends, is huge, and everyone who is reading this gets to own part of that.
I strongly suggest that you take a moment, and phone, write, FAX, or email Adam or Gary or whomever at Creation, and thank them for hearing your voices.
And if you come to the 15th show, please, please, please seek me out and introduce yourself. I’d like to know you.

296 thoughts on “Schism”

  1. Hi Wil
    I think its great that you will be at the convention. I have been a fan of yours since the beginning of Next Gen. I am glad to see you getting the recognition you deserve. I wish I could see you at the convention but the exchange rate between Canada and the US sucks right now hehe. i hope to meet you at another convention in the future.
    Best always Chris

  2. will.
    i’ve never posted a comment here before, but i felt compelled after reading this.
    are you crazy? you already are a celebrity. you have fans. i mean, it’s crazy, but you actually have this really wide-spectrum cult fanbase. you’re almost an icon. you’re already one of the greats, if only because of who you are.
    the implications of this are insane. everything just might start to turn around.
    ha. you wanna know how i found this site? i was reading x-e, and they mentioned your site. i just thought it was really wacky that you even had a website, so i went to check it out.
    you know what i’ve found over the past few months? a really complex guy who is pretty fucking cool (and has great taste in stuff, and actually endorses disinfo).
    you know what? that’s even better than being a star. sometimes i wonder if stars are even still burning cause they’re lightyears away. where’s the fun in that?
    so yeah. heh. go for it, man! sounds like a pretty rad deal.

  3. Wil! In the name of Bob and all that is unholy will you fer-crying out loud do something closer to TEXAS!?!?!?
    Seriously tho, I love you man, and I’m glad that all is well and all is well and all manner of things are well. I dont think anyone’s still reading down this far except maybe a future fanboy/girl reading the archives and scrolling thru. (Like me right now, I’m in March 2002- WOOHOO!) I’m still a little wired, I went and saw Little Feat and they ROCKED!!, but being its after 3am, I guess I’ll have to crash soon. anyway….I don’t buy this “my acting career is over” crap anymore than the rest of the posse and I think this is a good indicator of why. Good on ya

  4. Wil, it’s quite bizarre how you suddenly became THE thing on the Internet, but, yes, like the rest of your fans, I would urge you to enjoy attention from others, as long as it doesn’t go to your head!
    You prose is interesting, but when you wander too far into self-analysis, well, I can’t believe you’re typing out so much of your life to us.
    I like you though, still.

  5. Bravo Wil!
    I was on the edge of my seat all the way through your post hoping that you would be going to say yes.
    It is so cool that what started out (I imagine) as a cool little catch phrase ‘Wil has a posse’ is farking true now!
    Lets march on the capital and declare Wil the new Emporer!
    *Starts handing out blazing torches and pitchforks to the mob assembled*

  6. Well, well…imagine that! Wil Wheaton, alive and well and living in…Conventionland! Seriously though, it’s good to see you again. Yes, yes, I know you don’t know me, and I know you never ‘left’, but on my end, it’s good to see you. Came by way of a link posted by a friend on my message board (the quote about prioritizing your porn) and I am just down right jazzed as can be to see that you are still out there, somewhere…floating around…wearing only a cockring (pump up the volume wtg me!). So go to your convention, blow the kiddies away with some original prose, and tell us, at length, all about it.
    We will be visiting your blog for a daily read, and please feel free to browse ours. ;)
    psycoma-a.k.a-kathy

  7. Wil…
    I would love to be there to see you
    and all the STNG gang.. but with my hip, both legs
    and back … walking is very difficult at times..
    but, if I can get a electric scooter I’ll be
    there..with bells on..
    (just a figure of free speach)
    later

  8. I think it’s really cool that for once the voice of the fans have been heard. To tell the truth i’m not a huge star trek guy, but I am a huge ‘People’ guy, and I think this time we can mark one up for the ‘People.’ I won’t see you at the convention, but I have a good feeling you will have fun there! Congrats!

  9. Wow…wow. I’ve never been a Star Trek fan and I only stumbled onto this site because I saw a link to it on my favorite weblog. But it’s become a daily destination. Wil, you are an amazing writer. I’d read your entry about how Creation treated and I felt badly. But your entry today moved me to tears. How incredibly awesome is it to have change affected in your life because people stood up for you? Hopefully, you fully understand the power of the love people feel for you. Not just a block of “fans” but each individual who took time out of their own busy, complicated lives to contact Creation and champion your place in that show. who You are a very lucky person.
    I’m glad you decided to do the convention. It’s lovely for all the people that love you and made it happen. I would actually attend just to meet you but it’s too far away. Good luck and godspeed. I’ll be reading.

  10. great to hear the news wil…you know it’s a bitch getting rejected…like you did by the folks at creation…but sometimes it takes getting rejected to let a person know how many friends they have…and now the folks at creation know too… that’s something that paramount should keep in mind for the future…in case you still don’t know…you’ve got the power!…use it wisely.

  11. I’m thrilled they phoned you back, and even more thrilled you’re doing the convention. Yes, you will always be young Wesley, but nowhere does it say you can’t forge new paths. Look at Harrison Ford – Han Solo forever! And Indiana Jones…. oh and Jack Ryan, and…..
    You have the talent my friend, we all believe in you, now is the time to believe in yourself too.
    Let us poor Aussies know how it goes, hmmm? :)
    Susan
    aka Ozq

  12. Wil –
    Just wanted to drop you a line and let you know I sent a fax to Adam saying that I (and others) were glad he invited you to the con. Curious to find out how many thank you’s he gets.

  13. Regardless of all the angst you still took the time, not just to share this with us, but to say thank you as well. Dammit, you’re OK Wil Wheaton. ;D

  14. It’s about time that the powers that be in the convention world, realize the appeal that Uncle Willie has, and that us, his Posse, are a force to be recon’d with!
    Hmmm … and to prove just that very point, looks like Uncle Willie’s Auto on eBay by Slanted Fedora here:
    http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2134644841
    went in the end for a little over $300.
    Now, they’ve put up another one up for auction here:
    http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=2137035957
    as well, and thus far, the top bid is just under $13 bucks. I wonder where it’ll end up at?

  15. My, what a long post. Then again, it’s your website, eh? Now, obviously you need my opinion. Why? Well, if you don’t know, I’m not gonna tell you! Hah!
    So – opinion… Go. Go to the Con. Go and do your thang. Why? Well, we don’t know ALL the angst you’ve got – probably only you & your missus DO know (by the way, I wonder what HER opinion is on this). But at the end of the day, Wil, if you WANT to go, then do it.
    Take a risk. What do you have to lose? Hmm?? Do you want lots of ‘what ifs’? Besides, after THAT many words in your posts, and THAT much of a response from your supporters, and THAT much frickin’ angst, wouldn’t it just be pointless to NOT go now…?
    Reward youself for all the hours and minutes you’ve spent on brain time with this whole thing. Keep living your life – GO AND HAVE A GOOD TIME!!!
    Here endeth the lesson.
    Peace.

  16. Hey Wil…
    Here is my .02 cents for today
    “It is very easy to leave a moving car,but it is much harder to get back in”
    Do Creation and see how it turns out dont leave yourself with the should have,could have,would have feelings.
    If things work out great if not,no big deal.
    P.S. could you e-mail me a recipet on the .02

  17. Wil,
    In your post you said…
    “But that revolving door is spinning, and I don’t know how I can face the people who said “Good for you! Leave Star Trek behind you forver!” ”
    You must remember that those of us that said that are behind you 100% no matter what decision you make, Wil. You have our encouragment and support. You are great, man…wish I could be at that con.
    Keep up the good work!
    Take care..be safe!
    ~JENNIFER~

  18. Hiya Wil,
    It’s great that you now get to go more on your terms, and your fans get to see you. But when you going to come to the uk, and see your fans over here?
    Kordith

  19. Yay! Now I hope that you will make it out to a con in the midwest!
    What amazes me is that the Creation idiot didn’t know about the popularity of this website!

  20. Wil.
    I have to confess! I (and quite a few other ‘Posse-ettes’ I suppose) am worried about you. Are you heading warp factor 9.75 towards an ulcer? You need to slow down dearie. Endless 12 hour days will do nothing for your health (trust me! “Been there, done that, care to borrow the T-shirt?”)
    Dont worry about your fans, they can take care of themselves! You give us a little piece of “Welcome to Wil’s World” with every blog. I dont have a blog! No-one here knows anything of me, but I betcha a crate of Romulan ale that every one of the Posse know you and they only want you to do what YOU want to do. You give 110% of yourself to your fans every (or nearly every) day. And what if you made yourself ill? What would we do then?!?
    I’m not saying that you’re the Messiah or anything. I quote from Monty Python’s Life Of Brian, “He is NOT the Messiah…he’s a very naughty boy! Now P*SS OFF!!!”
    And on that note, I make one request. Before you click another ‘i’ or tap another ‘t’ I would kindly ask that you give your wife a ‘5 minute kiss’ and your boys the BIGGEST hug in Christendom! If not for yourself, then for the ‘Posse’.
    Keep the faith my friend.

  21. Um, is it just me, or did Wil’s ANONYMOUS poster leave a name? Janis Cortese, anyone?
    Janis, you ROCK! Keep reading and posting.
    I for one wish more people would remove their mouths from around Wil’s dick, just long enough to tell him what they really think.

  22. Wil, I cannot add anything here that hasn’t already been said by 223 other fans(current count). I have never gone to a con in my life, but I’ll go to this one because of the integrity you’ve shown and continue to show in life.
    Creation may be an 800lbs gorilla but 800lbs of gorilla need to be fed. We, your fans are holding the bananas and they are listening to the little bell for feeding time.

  23. Another word. After you do the convention consider taking all the entries you’ve written at WWDN and compiling them into a book (as you’ve been urged to many many times before). Not only will your posse happily buy it, you’ll gain more fans.
    And it would be a real book! After reading them from entry #1, I got a real sense of a story, YOUR story–and now it’s a story with a happy ending.
    You are an exceptional young man–but also, right AT THIS MOMENT, you are in a unique position. Because not only are you a respected screen actor, a comic talent, and a significant part of a cultural phenomenon, you’ve now managed to become the hottest thing on the Net by dint of having revealed to any and all who would surf to your website the simple truths about your life.
    AND–singlehandedly, you inspired hundreds of readers to take action. It may not have been for World Peace, but the sudden force and efficacy of their calls and emails is not to be trivialized.
    Now you tell me if anything quite like this has happened before. Verily I say unto you, Wil Wheaton, you have taught me that An Internet That Never Forgets Its Human Basis can be the strongest power on earth.

  24. Yanno…we should start campaigning whenever Wil auditions for a part. If the stupid people won’t help him fix his career, why can’t we speak up for him? If there was ever anyone deserving of an effort like that, it’s Wil…
    Peace,
    Pen

  25. Wil,
    Seriously, I think you need to take ANOTHER, another long look at yourself.
    I see an obvious pattern here: with the convention, the infommercial and pretty much everything else.
    You go through all this inner termoil which I think is total bullshit and in the end — always in the end — you take the money.
    Just because you argue with yourself (quite neurotically i might add) does not make your decision to do a TNG convention or whore yourself out for infommercials any more valiant.
    Every single time, the pattern is clear. It’s the money. It’s the attention — even the slightest bit of it which drives you daily.
    I work in Los Angeles. I see it everyday with friends. Once you get a taste of the fame part of celebrity, it’s a drug. Acting, the craft or any obligation to your family and yourself is superceded by that need to be famous again.
    You are acting no different than Darva Conger or anyone else from the reality TV drivel that would do anything to keep that lingering “I’m important” feeling.
    You were a whiny little precocious brat when you were a kid actor. No different from Gary Coleman. No different from anyone.
    Stop whining. Take the money and stop torturing yourself or your readers. Everyone KNOWS you’re going to take the money. YOU KNOW you’re going to take the money.
    If your decision to do an informmercial is based on the fact that your passion for acting has waned, then that is really really sad.
    What’s waned is actually your integrity.
    You are ordinary
    Scott Howard
    [email protected]

  26. Uncle WIll-
    Thats so awsome I sent Creation an e-mail thanking them for “thinking of the fans”. I also tried to see if I can afford to go to the left coast (I live in Atlanta) and I’m very hurt that I cannot finnaly meet you this time around :( But there will be a next time.
    I think you should do it and listen to your fans just as you have. Always remember I am a member of your “posse” weather or not you welcome it.
    As for as putting Trek behind you, I understand can respect how you feel about that (to a point, because I was never an actor or in the know so to speak) But look at it like this, if the fans want you there than isn’t that reason enough to go, plus the added cash flow for your family?
    You got great karma bro!! Just stick with it, I think this is in a way a new beginning because more and more poeple are finding out about WWDN!!
    Best of luck man!

  27. Scott Howard.
    wow…mister sensitivity….
    what a jerk you are….
    does Wil go to your weblog and talk shit to you?
    pay no attention to this guy Wil…
    No matter where you go, or who you are, you’re bound to run into guys like this…
    luckily there are a few thousand of us to more than balance the equation.
    and seriously….
    when are you gonna get your ass up to Toronto?

  28. I haven’t read all two-hundred-and-some-odd posts, so someone might have brought this up already. Forgive me if I’m being redundant. But hell, Wil, Nimoy had the cajones to write a book entitled ‘I am NOT Spock’, and we all know how his experience with Trek has turned out. You’re not the first to try and beat the Star Trek stigma, and by the looks of things you probably won’t be the last. Sort of like the Bond Girls, though I’m not necessarily dying to see you in fishnets with the moniker ‘Richard Beninya’. That being said, please indulge me by giving my opinion as an outsider: 1) Sure, it’s hard to be seen as anybody but Wesley Crusher, but 2) you’ve experienced something that I, as an aspiring actor, would kill for (okay, maybe not kill, but quite possibly maim). It sounds like you have pretty good perspective on where you are in life, and you’ve analysed it as rationally as you can. I, for one, think you made the right decision, and you handled it like the adult you are while keeping your integrity. I believe that the head of Creation should be lauded for being a stand-up guy as well. Good for both of you. I sincerely wish I could be there; but being a family man myself, I have other obligations. That being said, have a great time, Mr. Wheaton!

  29. Wil,
    Life is all about growth, and change. But growing does not always have to mean leaving the past behind.
    Enmbrace your past as part of you, hold on to the things you enjoy, let go of those that you do not.
    Doing the things you enjoy (i.e. your sketch routine) for your Trek fans is a positive thing, in my opinion. For all involved.
    If you were going to the convention, and talking about your Trek days, and reliving the past. That would be stuck in your proverbial revolving door. You’re moving forward, growing up, and sharing that with your Trek Fans.
    Get down with your bad self Wil. You ARE the man.
    Beau
    Wish I could make it, say hi, and shake your hand again. But I know many others will. Enjoy.

  30. It’s 12:06 in the morning, I have school tomorrow, my homework isn’t done, and i’m up reading Wil Wheaton dot net. What the hell is wrong with me?
    The past, is nothing more than that. The past. It can’t be changed, altered, and whatever happened, happened. You’re just gona have to live with it. It’s good to see your starting to move on from Wesley Crusher. Regardless of your acting career’s past, it looks like your starting to build your own sub-pop culture cult with the internet world, and I think it’s great news that you’re starting to put that into the picture more and more with how that interacts with your life. However, just remember: Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it. Don’t make it too much of a good thing.
    Personally Wily I don’t really think acting is your niche anymore. You’ve probably created more of a cult success from this website alone than all your previous work combined, and I think sometihng along the lines of a book would be more sucessful at this point than any acting job, not unless you get another Star Trek-ish role along the lines soon. See how the audience likes your writting work at convention and then factor that in with the cult status of WWDN, and then ask yourself what’s going to be more of a success at this point. I know i’d certinally enjoy seeing a book from you…it would be the first one i’ve read freely in years.
    But then again, what do I know?

  31. Hey Wil,
    I checked the creation site and they already have the notice up that you are appearing and signing autographs for free. Sorry I can’t attend as I am in Afghanistan and don’t think I would get away in time. Best of luck and I know you will have a report of the convention posted here for all to see.

  32. Wil:
    From a post above: “You are ordinary.
    Scott Howard” Speaking for just myself (and I suspect many of the rest of the Posse), you will never be ordinary. You are a gifted writer, a really funny guy with a mature sense of wit, and a good actor. What Scott wrote is bullshit because he doesn’t know you, obviously doesn’t ever take the time to read your logs on a regular basis, and is probably angry that he can’t be married to a hot chick like you are. ;)
    As for *CREATION*, I’m glad your going, and have to join the hordes who lobbied for you but still can’t attend ’cause it’s on the wrong coast.
    Wish I *could* shake your hand, look you in the eye, and say “thanks for all you have done/meant to *me*”.
    Consider this my handshake, dude. Thanks.
    Ahud

  33. Wil, I am thrilled you decided to do the show. Of all the cons I have attended, I have seen many of my favorite Trek actors: Stewart (le sigh), Spiner, Frakes. I even sat through Grace Lee Whitney (yawn) to see George Takei. You were the one person I waited to see and never could. If you do any cons on the East Coast, please let us know.
    Good Luck with the show!

  34. This is just a test, since I’ve been having trouble posting lately. But just in case it works- Wil, I’m glad that things worked out the way they did for you. I’m hopeful that one day you’ll come to a con in NJ so I can meet you! :D
    Love, Alicia
    http://www.thewagband.com

  35. Goddammit Wil, I don’t know much, but I know this. If you go through life wondering how others will react to what you do, you won’t end up doing anything that makes you truley happy. Don’t think about the fans, don’t think about the critics. If you want to be a part of it, do it because you genuinely want to, because it’s something that will make you happy, or fulfilled. If you want to leave it behind, the people who truley understand and appreciate you will back that up 100%. No one here really knows what your experiences in Trek have been like. In the end, t’s just like any other job I suppose. There are the poeple who you grow to love and respect, and then there are many many asshats who take those good moments and twist them until your stomach knots.
    So look inside and make the decision from there, either way, those who are more then mere Trek fans will support you no matter what.
    Nuff said.

  36. Way to go Wil. I’ve never been enough of a Star Trek fan to actually think of attending a Con, but would that I were going to be in Pasadena, I’d make it a priority to attend just to shake your hand.
    -Jase
    p.s. Tell the G4 TV guys to force the (expletive string) (/expletive string) execs at Time Warner Cable to air the network (or at the very least Arena)

  37. Awesome for you, Wil! Only what you deserve. I understand your conflict but maybe you can find a balance between your history with Trek and your future goals. I’m **so** bummed that I can’t go to the convention. It’s very cool that you’re willing to talk with fans and sign stuff.

  38. I have to say, it kinda awes me that you don’t get more of the ‘go whine to your momma!’ responses. Not that that’s my personal sentiment, but I can’t say it hasn’t skirted the edge of my thoughts when reading your journal. You have all the same problems we’ve all got, with one exception. You’re famous. Struggling actor or not…
    It seems you seek rationalizations and justifications from friends and fans in the guise of advice. Don’t bother. You want to go to that convention. WE want you to go to that convention. I would think the choice should have been cake. No need to justify or rationalize anything. I hope you didn’t feel you had to. Not to anyone but yourself, anyway.
    We all knew that mailing off that plastic Wesley doll was not gonna make the good the bad and the ugly of the past 15 years go away—and thank goodness for that!
    Everyone who has ever posted to this site came here because you were famous. We come back because you’re Wil. A cool, smart, witty guy that we can relate to.
    Bear that in mind, and just do your thing.

  39. It seems to me that the worst part of this is you’re trying to reconcile playing a horridly drawn character on a very popular show. The show gave people hope and good entertainment, but your contribution to it was derided as a black spot, because it was hobbled by bad writing and a general confusion by its creators as to just how they wanted Wes portrayed. So you’re torn between wanting to stay involved with people you genuinely adore and a cultural phenomenon worth being proud of, all the while knowing that YOUR part in it is held in considerably low esteem. The show was great; your character wasn’t. No wonder you feel conflicted.

  40. WOW!!!!!!!I go away for 3 days and there is ALL
    THIS!!
    Like so many other POSSE MONKEY’S..I will be there
    in spirit..
    I would go if it was closer to ATL…(like “zandra” said YOU are the only person that
    could get me to go to a CON)
    HOWEVER Mr. Wheaton..you SHOULD consider what
    someone else said..
    IF THE POSSE CAN GET YOU “BACK” IN TO THE CONVENTION…”WHY” CAN’T WE GET YOUR “CAMEO”
    BACK INTO “THAT MOVIE?”
    You DO rawk Wil…GOOD JOB MONKEY’S!!!!

  41. Sure do understand wanting to leave something you have done in the past behind you, but as we all learn, that is just not possible. It is part of you. Everyone goes through that at one time or another, you just have to do it much more publicly.

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