Vacation

I know this is going to upset you, but somehow I know you’ll find a way to struggle through… your Uncle Willie is heading out of town for a week, and won’t have net access.
Okay, okay, stop your cryin’, or I’ll give you something to cry about!
It’s Mrs. Uncle Willie’s birthday, and we’re heading up to fabulous Lake Tahoe with the kids and the dog. Sounds great, right?
Hold on a sec…we’re going up there in …a minivan.
That’s right. A mini-van. We had to rent a bigger car, so we could fit all our crap and the Ferris’ crate…and rather than get something sort of cool like a lame SUV, we got a mini-van. I’m driving for 8 hours in a minivan.
I am so lame.
Let’s talk about minivans for a second, shall we? Is there another mode of transportation, not regularly used by the Amish, that is more lame? When I see a minivan, I think, “That person’s just given up. they’ve reached their goal in life of having the 3.5 kids, the dog and the coveted PTA membership.”
There’s nothing more sad to me than seeing some dude, who you can tell used to be cool, or some woman, who was probably a hottie at one time, behind the wheel of a Ford Aerostar, the bumper covered with a protective layer of “my kid was the student of the month” bumper stickers, the windows smeared with greasy little kid handprints, and the sad, mournful sound of “Radio Disney” blaring out of the open windows.
The mini-van that we got is the Dodge Caravan. It’s the one with the easily removable seats. Last night, Anne and I were moving the seats out, and it was much easier than I thought it would be, and I caught myself thinking “This is kinda cool”….suddenly, and without warning, I screamed “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” My wife looked at me, terror in her eyes, and asked what was wrong.
“I thought, for a millisecond, that there was something cool about this van.”
My wife walked around the minivan, came close to me, and punched me full in the mouth.
“Don’t ever think something like that again.”
“Thank you.”
So I won’t be able to update the site, obviously, and all that stuff that I wanted to do before I left town, like get the new site up and running, and opening the store and all that won’t happen until I get home.
But! Have no fear! I have a cool site for you to check out until I get back. It’s called “Killoggs“. It’s a very cool blogging site, created by the amazing bendependent and loren
Have a great weekend and week, and play nice. Don’t make me turn this minivan around, because I’ll do it.