Art imitates life imitates art

Today, I had an audition over at Paramount for a pilot where the character I’m reading for is turning 30, and regrets some decisions that he made when he was a teenager. So he wishes for a chance to go back and have a “do-over”.
I am not making this up, and the show is not called “The Wil Wheaton Story”.
I had lots of fun doing it, because the show is a comedy, and the character is, and again, I’m not making this up, very ironic, sarcastic, and acerbic.
Now I’m wondering if I should sue them for stealing my move?
Anyway, since I was there, I stopped at the “Nemesis” set, and got an eyeful of some amazingly scary aliens, and got to say hello to Patrick and Brent, and John Logan.
I also wanted to wish Patrick and Brent good luck in the 4 Man Bobsled event at the olympics, in which they’ve decided to compete, as late entries.
You know, every time I go to Paramount, I am overwhelmed by this weird conflicting melange of emotions: nostalgia, happiness, and melencholy being the most prominent ones…for as much as I didn’t like it when I was younger (mostly due to my age), I really miss that place…and being on Stage 16, which was our “Swing Stage” (a stage that can be changed from week to week to be a planet, or alien spaceship, or holodeck set), really flooded back the memories. If only I had been listening to “Strangelove” or “Head on the Door” on a walkman, the circle would have been complete.
I also got a call from my friend Seth Wiley, who directed me in “The Good Things“, and he told me that I was mentioned over at LaidOffLand.com. I thought that this quote was really cool:“Wil Wheaton should be named like the Grand Chancellor of the Internet. For his assistance, I’ve named him The El Supremo of LaidOffLand.”
That brought a big smile to my face. 🙂

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103 thoughts on “Art imitates life imitates art”

  1. first comment! little old me!
    heh.
    i guess that plotline mirrors everypne’s life.
    but we wouldn’t be where we are had we not done the things we did.
    *emma’s Deep Thought for the day*
    :p

  3. i disagree – i think wil’s under-known and well appreciated
    i still think if more people read his webpage he’d be made president or something :p
    WIL HAS A POSSE!
    heh

  4. I saw that, Joy.
    I think I’m getting some “Blowback”.
    And I don’t mean of the Lewinsky variety.

  6. I want a Wil for President Shirt.
    Heck, I’d settle for blow back.
    Of the kind that Clinton should have given Miss Lewinsky.
    Wil, do you think that all the press of late has helped at all during pilot season?

  7. ewwwwww
    blowback might be going a bit far
    he’s got KIDS dammit!
    :p
    but yeah
    a wil for president shirt would be most cool. he needs a campaign slogan.
    “wil wheaton – promises to be better than bush.”

  8. Mmmmmmm blowback.
    Damn, Willie, you HAVE been a busy boy. I have been too, so I dont really know what’s been going on. Hope there isn’t a raw nerve in here but, what happened with the Star Trek movie? I though they wanted you in? You in or what? I guess this tells how much time I have had to come read up.
    ~t e s~

  9. I hope you get it! I’m going to Paramount on Tuesday, so I leave some mojo there for you.
    Break a leg…

  14. wow…thats hilarious! grand chancellor of the internet…i want that to be my job! does it pay well wil? lemme know…ill put in a resume…probably pays better than all my gigs and teaching combined!
    now wil, dont go gettin all uppity on us!
    and everybody stop that blowback shit! hes a married man, and responsible for the well-being of 2 children! show the man some respect!
    (hehehe…im funny when im sarcastic…but i do respect you wil! grand chancellor…good one)
    lata~

  15. Art may imitate life.
    But if any of your showbiz cronie-fucks trolling this site imitate MY art without permission, I am going to imitate a steak knife into someone’s eye legal-law style, fucker.
    And that’s one to grow on.

  16. Wil wrote:
    “Today, I had an audition over at Paramount for a pilot where the character I’m reading for is turning 30, and regrets some decisions that he made when he was a teenager. So he wishes for a chance to go back and have a “do-over”.
    “I am not making this up, and the show is not called “The Wil Wheaton Story”.”
    Hey, Wil. God willing, “The Wil Wheaton Story” has another 50+ years to develop. And I suspect that, at the end of that time, you will find very few teenage decisions that didn’t ultimately work out for the best.
    Or at least worked out… 🙂
    As talented as you are now, keep in mind that actors get better with age. (I blush to admit I’m old enough to remember Sean Connery’s acting talent (as James Bond) getting abused by the critics.)
    Hell, if you were a famous athlete, you’d be a bare five years or so away from light beer commercials.
    Now THAT would be something to regret…

  17. You know what I hate about films like “Jane White is Sick and Twisted,” and “The Good Things”? They are never ever shown in the state of Georgia! Ditto Wil’s sketch comedy. It’s so not fair!

  19. Can I write “The Wil Wheaton Story?”
    Seriously.
    Can I?
    You don’t know anyone as funny as me.
    No, you don’t.
    No.
    …
    …
    You DON’T.
    Shut the fuck up.
    No.
    See y’all in 12.
    Out.

  20. Spudnuts –
    You would kick ass on a debating team. (I’m not saying you’d win, but you WOULD kick ass. And then you’d win the other debates by forfeit.)
    I think I’ve figured this out.
    You should write a screenplay and Wil should act in it.

  22. Spudnuts, you are a very funny guy!! You are a guy, right???
    Wil, it’s about time you got recognition for this site, your screen work and got some new films to get you back on our screens!!!
    Good luck with the pilot!
    Love Donna
    P.S. the mojo you sent me when i went for my job interview worked!! I’m spending six months in greece this summer!!!

  23. Ah yes to be able to go back to my wonderful teenage years and to correct past mistakes.
    For starters, I won’t get caught this time!!!

  25. Oh man, that bobsled article had me cracking up. Then again, I honestly don’t think you can get much cooler than Patrick Stewart.
    At least from the lowly fan perspective. 🙂
    I had the pleasure of seeing him in The Ride Down Mt. Morgan on Broadway a couple of years back. It was such a simple show, but what he did with the character had me floored.
    Oh, and Wil’s real cool too. 🙂

  26. How about
    “Wil Wheaton…looks BETTER than Bush”
    for a campaign slogan?
    *Blushes like mad and goes to hide now*
    ~Kaylin

  29. I’m just laughing at the visual image of the “Trek Bobsled Team!”.
    I can’t tell, is Patrick Stewart wearing a helmet or not? : )

  30. Okay, I wasn’t going to mention this on WWDN but since you brought up the Olympics, it’s not completely OT…
    …my brother-in-law made the U.S. National Figure Skating team!!
    He competes with his wife in the ice dance event (Beata Handra & Charles Sinek), so look for them in Salt Lake! They don’t have a chance to medal, but they’ve been skating for practically their entire lives and it’s so fantastic to see their Olympic dream come true. Our whole family is going to watch them compete in SLC, and some good mojo their way from the WWDN posse would be great!
    There’s a nice article about them on the Olympic website at:
    http://www.saltlake2002.com/x/f/frame.htm?u=/news/686730.asp

  31. Well, if you want to do something good today, something you won’t regret down the line, folks you could always bid on my charity auction on e-bay!
    It’s for a Roxann Dawson fan club T-shirt 😉

  34. Uncle Willie…er, Wil…or rather, “Your Grace”? 😮 )
    It’s fun to go down memory lane, I’ll admit, but sometime the trip doesn’t end up like one usually wishes. Glad you got to see some of your *old* (older?) acting buddies. What IS the latest word on “Nemesis”? Are you or are you not onboard for that project?
    Mucho luck with the potential pilot…sounds like it fits you like the proverbial glove.
    Laters,
    Mark

  35. Well wil,
    One things for sure. If you do get the pilot at Paramount and they put the show on the air, it’ll never get cancelled because all 50,00 monkeys here at this site will keep the ratings high, and buy the merchandise, and the action figures….it’ll be great!
    ~Lorraine
    oh yeah, and good luck :>

  36. Spudnuts said: “But if any of your showbiz cronie-fucks trolling this site imitate MY art without permission, I am going to imitate a steak knife into someone’s eye legal-law style, fucker.”
    Gulp. I guess Spud hasn’t heard my mp3s of him.
    Or if’n he has, my days are numbered.
    Coat-tail riding is the sincerest form of plagurism, right?
    Double-gulp.

  37. Late alert-I just flipped over our local PAX TV channel and they’re re-running the Star Trek Weakest Link episode right now. (It’s 8PM ET right now). Think I’ll watch Wil and Roxann Dawson hate each other all over again! : )

  39. I think Wil knows who wrote the Wil Wheaton story…
    Crazy kids.
    Although…Wil’s too young to be 30.
    Hell, I’m too young to be 30 and I’m almost 32.
    Oh well, the Cheese gets better with age.

  41. I think the winter olympics are horribly boring. I guess I have to watch, just to laugh at Patrick, Brent, Micheal, and Jonathon….*grins* Anyone know what time/day it will be played or whatever? Email me if you do….I won’t check here for it…
    ~Sarah

  43. holy shit.
    I just listened to those MP3s.
    God-DAMN I am smart.
    No.
    Really.
    Imo rub mysef over here.
    BRB.
    Done.
    Hey.
    Rob.
    I mean Bobby the Mat.
    I mean…
    Rob.
    You stole from me.
    You stole what is MINE.
    You stole from ME!
    Now SOMEBODY needs to get a steak knife imitated into their eye legal-law style.
    But, Bobby the Mat…
    It’s not gonna be you.
    It’s gonna be someone else.
    Someone else because…
    Because you say words mine gooder than me.
    In audio format.
    I have been kicking around for MONTHS the thought of either:
    A) Making MP3s of old posts… Lakerboard, Salon, or otherwise.
    B) Making some MPEGs of me reading my posts in front of… oh… say… a train, some city lights, a dead guy, a tombstone, the rain, a shower stall.
    And I was gonna get around to it soon, but…
    Your interpretation is better than mine.
    Souperior delivery.
    Really.
    It has to be.
    So.
    WHEN we take this bus trip with that little skirt-boy BITCH television’s Wil-fucking-Wheaton you are going to record ALL of my words.
    I got shit going back… like… well… THIRTY YEARS what needs the Bobby Mat treatment.
    I wrote this story when I was four called “Farmer Brown vs. The Devil” where the Devil — fucking Eisner-esque shithole dick cunt-monkey that he IS — messed all up Farmer Brown’s crops for no reason good enough to be known by no one but the Prince of Darkness hisself.
    So then Farmer… like… GETS A HELICOPTER… and he… he… Farmer Brown… HE… fucks up the Devil but GOOD.
    Yeah.
    I drew pictures.
    But never has it made the transition to talkie.
    Until now.
    So, Bobby the Mat,
    You and me are gonna have words on this…
    When I get back from my vacation this week to the city where Wil Wheaton lives, but I’m not going to SEE Wil Wheaton because Wil Wheaton is too busy beseeching Hollywood for his MOTHERFUCKING bread instead of calling Bobby the Mat and Spudnuts off the bench to fucking TAKE what is rightfully theirs (and to a lesser extent, his) from the fuck-ass villagers who have no GODDAMNED BUSINESS (the meek shall inherit my boot) opposing Eli Wallach and his fifty strong man, or indeed ANY man who carries armament because I am fittin’ to throw this fucking rock down and AI cross-over break some ankles with my…
    Fuck.
    …
    …
    …
    …
    Lost it.
    Anyway…
    Yeah.
    The audio is good.
    When I get back.
    We will talk.
    And as for the steak knife in the eye?
    SOMEBODY has to take that steak knife, Bobby the Mat.
    Not you.
    But…
    While I’m gone, you, and Wil, and some other poster PICK SOMEONE who is going to take YOUR steak knife.
    In.
    The.
    Eye.
    I gotta go home.
    It’s a long drive to Los Angeles.
    You thought I was flying, right?
    Please.

  44. Crispin Glover is doing the remake of “Willard” so that sinks “The Wil Wheaton Story”. Hope you get the role. Knock on wood.
    Once again the great sport of curling gets royally shafted. Ice, rocks and brooms. What more could one ask for when it comes to winter sport?
    I hear Grand Chancellors get a 10% discount at Blockbuster.

  50. Spudnuts- I think people would get a major system shock listening to those extremes one after the other. I sure as hell did!
    But I’m OK now.

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