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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

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WIL WHEATON dot NET
WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

Attention, Canada!

Posted on 24 February, 2002 By Wil

On behalf of all American hockey fans, I would like to officially begin the shit-talking:

Dear Canada,
Today, we are going to kick your ass.
Oh, sure, the score, and the game, will undoubtedly be close, but we will be handing you your toque-wearing, back-bacon-eating, gold-medal-not-getting asses to you.
You may have invented the sport, and for that we will always be grateful, but it would seem that, in the last 50 years, you’ve passed the torch to…well, anyone else who would take it, really.
We’ll happily take it from here.
Hey, don’t feel too bad. You’ve still got all our film work, and Curling. Nobody can take that away from you.
Sincerely,
Wil

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  1. stacy says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:55 pm

    eeeeek! I can’t even watch the game right now (stuck at work) and this is exciting, LoL…
    urhm… go USA?

  2. T says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:55 pm

    bah! Hockey’s better then figure skating anyday

  3. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:56 pm

    FUCK!

  4. Amanda says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:56 pm

    SCORE!!!!!
    GO CANADA GO!!!

  5. fenaray says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:56 pm

    YESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!
    YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!

  6. wil says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:57 pm

    Okay, okay, okay…
    I’m searching GOOGLE for the lyrics in English and French.
    An image search is also forthcoming.
    As a long-suffering LA Kings fan, I am used to this sinking feeling.
    🙂

  7. T says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:57 pm

    4 – 2!!!!

  8. JASON says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:57 pm

    Wil,
    Time to start praticing taking it like a man. This is way too depressing. lol

  9. fenaray says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:57 pm

    Oh Ca – Na – Da……………
    WOOOOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!
    I LOVE Hockey

  10. ProfWendi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:58 pm

    Hey Wil, do you even *know* the lyrics to our national anthem? You better go look them up…!
    🙂

  11. CarolP says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:58 pm

    People in all the apartments around me are screaming 🙂 (the good kind of screaming)

  12. Gigi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:59 pm

    http://www.pch.gc.ca/ceremonial-symb/english/emb_anthem.html
    I still had them from finding them for sunshine after the women’s game

  13. fenaray says:
    24 February, 2002 at 1:59 pm

    Oooh, almost got another one

  14. stacy says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:00 pm

    well, from what I’ve seen, most of the Canadian athletes don’t know the words to “Oh Canada”….

  15. kendoka says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:00 pm

    What a game!

  16. John McGregor says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:00 pm

    You do know that our anthem is bilingual, don’t you?
    John Mcgregor

  17. Gigi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:01 pm

    that’s because they would rather sing the bobby gimby version 😉
    CAAAAAAA-NAAAAAAAA-DAAAAAAAAA
    weeeeeeeee
    looooooooooove
    youuuuuuuuuuuuu

  18. JSc says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:01 pm

    At least america will always have football.
    Though watching some of the old CFL games is rather hilarious.
    Any idea why football (not soccer) isn’t an olympic sport?

  19. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:01 pm

    SON OF A BITCH!

  20. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:01 pm

    SON OF A BITCH!

  21. Amanda says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:01 pm

    SCORE!!!!!

  22. iren says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:01 pm

    YEAHHH! I love this game. I can’t even see it, but this is so exciting. Wil, i’ll get ya started : Oh Canada! Terre de nos aieux…
    I. AM. CANADIAN.

  23. Gigi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    ok, everyone is honking horns
    i think now is the time we sing
    NA NA NA NA
    NA NA NA NA
    HEY HEY HEY

  24. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    one for each fall!

  25. fiftyfly says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    1:30 left, 2:5 – still talkin trash?

  26. kendoka says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    Breathe, Cherish, breathe!

  27. Kris says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    AH! DAMNIT!!!! We’re roally farked!

  28. fenaray says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    YEAH BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    yeah baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Wooooo Hoooooo!!!!!!!!!!

  29. fiftyfly says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:02 pm

    1:30 left, 2:5 – still talkin trash?

  30. noworriesmon says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:03 pm

    Well, that was the nail in the coffin.
    All I gotta say is that was a GREAT hockey game.
    We still kicked ass at the olympics though. 30+ medals.
    Way to go Canada.
    *hand extended*

  31. MacManKrisK says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:03 pm

    AH! DAMNIT!!!! We’re roally farked!

  32. fenaray says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:03 pm

    YEAH BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    yeah baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Wooooo Hoooooo!!!!!!!!!!

  33. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:03 pm

    /me picks up her stick and pounds GIGI’S PUCK LIKE HEAD WITH IT!!

  34. Greg says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:04 pm

    Wel, at 5-2 with 1:30 left, I think the Canadians have finally won the Gold after 50 years of waiting. Congradulations Canada!

  35. ProfWendi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:04 pm

    7 Things I am Thankful For Today:
    1. Canada kick’s USA’s ass
    2. Canada kick’s USA’s ass
    3. Canada kick’s USA’s ass
    4. Canada kick’s USA’s ass
    5. Canada kick’s USA’s ass
    6. Canada kick’s USA’s ass
    7. Canadian beer and *real* Back Bacon!

  36. fenaray says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:04 pm

    And the gold goes to CANADA!

  37. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:04 pm

    heh

  38. Katie says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:04 pm

    Love your site Wil but consider your ass officially kicked by both our Men’s and Women’s team!!! Good game though eh : )

  39. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:04 pm

    Damn

  40. Geoff says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:05 pm

    Gee Will-my lame-ass Canadian TV must be on the fritz-30 seconds left and the guys in the white uniforms seem to be leading 5-2. Must have the colours reversed I guess. But tney have maple leafs on the front-is your team from Minnesota? Well, they played about as well as Belarus.

  41. bluesman says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:05 pm

    Start typing Wil,
    Its over

  42. Geoff says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:05 pm

    Gee Will-my lame-ass Canadian TV must be on the fritz-30 seconds left and the guys in the white uniforms seem to be leading 5-2. Must have the colours reversed I guess. But tney have maple leafs on the front-is your team from Minnesota? Well, they played about as well as Belarus.

  43. Cherish says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:05 pm

    yes, good game

  44. lola says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:05 pm

    Time to sing !!!

  45. Gigi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:06 pm

    well, i’m glad i was spared some lame shoot out.
    and the gold comes HOME.

  46. Amanda says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:06 pm

    That’s twice we’ve handed you your asses! people in the apartments around me are going nuts!!!

  47. Gigi says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:07 pm

    EIGHTEEN TWELVE!
    EIGHTEEN TWELVE!
    IN YOUR FACE!!!!

  48. Toonces says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:07 pm

    Gawd, the suspense is killin’ me, and I don’t even watch sports. Well, except for the occasional footie match- gotta love men running around in shorts!
    Anyway, I don’t know what all the fuss is about- isn’t Canada the 51st state? *dodges slap*
    >^..^

  49. Jo says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:08 pm

    Good game…..
    Now both the Men’s and Women’s Canadian teams have won the Gold Medals…….
    How sweet much more sweeter can it get?

  50. Toonces says:
    24 February, 2002 at 2:08 pm

    *Toonces hands Wil a big plate o’ crow.* Eat up, sweetie! 🙂

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