WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

Raving and Drooling

  • blog

Ferris is currently sitting behind me, chomping away at this chewie bone thing that we got her the other day. The thing that’s so cute about this is that she also has her Kong, and her Big Bouncy Ball protectively under her right front leg. Even though she’s really working this cornstarch bone thing, she is totally staring at me, just in case I decide to make a move for any of her toys.
It reminds me of this dog one of my friends used to have. His name was Boris, and Boris was insane. He would pee on everything, until they got him fixed, and even then he still humped everything in sight. It was pretty funny, when we were all about 22, to go to my friend’s house, and watch everyone jump out of the way, because once Boris got his heart set on your leg, or the leg of the sofa, or the cushion you’d just tossed on the floor, he was unrelenting in his expression of love.
Well, Boris had all kinds of toys, and he would move all of these toys from room to room in my friend’s house, depending on who he was happiest with in the family, at any given time. Usually, they all lived in my friend’s dad’s room. On those rare occasions that Boris was pissed at everyone, the toys would all be in the back yard.
This one time, in the early 90’s, my friend’s dad noticed that Boris, who was a little terrier dog, was getting really fat, so he put him on a diet. Strange thing was, Boris didn’t lose any weight. He actually gained weight.
Nobody could figure out what was going on, until my friend’s dad caught him jumping up near a wall in the backyard, grabbing and eating avocados off a neighbor’s tree, which hung over into my friend’s yard. It turned out that Boris had been eating all the avacados he could get his paws on for weeks, which is why he was getting fat in the first place. So my friend’s dad scolded Boris, fairly severly I guess, took the avocado away, and picked up all the pits and things that Boris had left under the tree.
Later that day, my friend’s dad went into his bedroom. Not surprisingly, all of Boris’ toys had been moved into the back yard. However, there was one thing left behind: an avocado pit, sitting in the middle of his bed.
True story.
Thought for today:


“Don’t forget your history
Know your destiny
In the abundance of water
The fool is thirsty.”

  • Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window) Tumblr
  • Click to share on Bluesky (Opens in new window) Bluesky
  • More
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Related


Discover more from WIL WHEATON dot NET

Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.

3 April, 2002 Wil

Post navigation

Arch Enemy of the Week! → ← Got your nose

Related Posts

catching halos on the moon

I had such a good time with my garden last season. It was the first time I had ever capital-t Tended a garden in my life, and it was a […]

in the heat of the summer better call out a plumber

Back in the old days, the good old days, when it was generally accepted that Fascism and Nazis were bad, bloggers would write these posts that were sort of recaps […]

lift every voice and sing

Lift every voice and sing,‘Til earth and heaven ring,Ring with the harmonies of Liberty;Let our rejoicing riseHigh as the listening skies,Let it resound loud as the rolling sea.Sing a song […]

it picks me up, puts me down

I’ve been open and unashamed about my mental health struggles and triumphs, always willing to talk about my CPTSD, always willing to supportively listen when someone chooses to share their […]

Recent Posts

catching halos on the moon

catching halos on the moon

I had such a good time with my garden last season. It was the first time I had ever capital-t Tended a garden in my life, and it was a […]

More Info
in the heat of the summer better call out a plumber

in the heat of the summer better call out a plumber

Back in the old days, the good old days, when it was generally accepted that Fascism and Nazis were bad, bloggers would write these posts that were sort of recaps […]

More Info
lift every voice and sing

lift every voice and sing

Lift every voice and sing,‘Til earth and heaven ring,Ring with the harmonies of Liberty;Let our rejoicing riseHigh as the listening skies,Let it resound loud as the rolling sea.Sing a song [...]

More Info
it picks me up, puts me down

it picks me up, puts me down

I’ve been open and unashamed about my mental health struggles and triumphs, always willing to talk about my CPTSD, always willing to supportively listen when someone chooses to share their [...]

More Info

 

  • Instagram
  • Facebook

Member of The Internet Defense League

Creative Commons License
WIL WHEATON dot NET by Wil Wheaton is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at http://wilwheaton.net.

Search my blog

Powered by WordPress | theme SG Double
%d