Dear That Guy,
Like you, I am a huge Cubs fan. Like you, I’ve been telling people “next year! Next Year!” as long as I can remember. Like you, I am crushed that they aren’t going to the World Series. Again.
Unlike you, most of Chicago (and the world, really) could give a shit about me. That’s where this letter, from some guy you’ll never meet and could probably care less about, comes in. See, I think we have a few things in common, and I just wanted to take a minute here and tell you that I think you’re getting a bunch of shit that you don’t deserve.
I used to be on this big cult TV show that had lots of very passionate fans. Many of those fans absolutely (and irrationally) hated the character I played on that show. Most of them wrote me nasty letters and heckled me whenever I’d show up at one of their events, they never called my house, or tried to hurt me, but I can sort of imagine what you’re going through. That thing that makes a sports fan wear only paint and a diaper to a ball game when it’s 15 degrees outside? It’s the same thing that makes a Star Trek fan wear the same unwashed uniform for 5 days in a row at a big ass con.
I’ve read that just about every Cubs fan in the world is giving you hell for going after that foul ball. Well, That Guy, last time I checked, baseball fans like to catch foul balls. It’s something we do, like paying too much for terrible beer and screaming at a player for not picking up that slider that we’re so certain we’d be able to hit if they’d just put our fat asses in the game. Hell, I’ve been going to 20 or 30 games a season at Dodger Stadium for almost 30 years, and I try to catch a foul ball every single time I’m there. I’ve even had my hot wife flirt with the teenage bat boy in a pathetic effort to score one. To date, I am still empty-handed. But that bat boy, Jesse, is convinced that my wife’s going to leave me just as soon as he gets out of high school.
Anyway, That Guy, enough about me. This is about you.
It’s not your fault that the Cubs lost game 6. It’s not your fault that Dusty Baker probably left Prior in too long, or that Alex Gonzalez chose game 6 to make his 11th error of the whole freakin’ year. It’s not your fault the Cubs stranded 7 runners. It’s not your fault that they lost game 7. It’s not your fault that Kerry Wood, normally one of the best pitchers in baseball, just couldn’t get it together in game 7. (That was a sweet fuckin’ homerun though, wasn’t it?! I was screaming and cheering so loudly I scared both of my dogs!)
In short, it’s not your fault the Cubs lost three in a row. As a matter of fact, I’m pretty sure it’s the players fault they lost three in a row. Even Dusty Baker said, “We didn’t lose the pennant, the Marlins won it. We were close and the Marlins took it from us, it’s as simple as that.” You’ll notice that he didn’t say “That Guy took it from us.”
Yep. You know, now that I think about it, I’m positive that it wasn’t your fault, and I’m pretty mad at anyone who’s giving you shit about the loss.
It’s pretty fucked up that those jackals in the news media printed your name, That Guy, and it’s even more fucked up that they disclosed your workplace and forced you to change your phone number. But don’t quit coaching the little league team, okay? Since you’re not a dad, you’re probably not coaching that team for your own personal glory, or doing it because it’s the only way you know how to relate to your son. You’re probably there for those kids, and you’re probably having a positive impact on their lives. What are they going to learn if they lose their coach, That Guy?! Think of the children, okay? Don’t be a quitter!
Tell you what. You keep coaching that team, and if you ever come to Los Angeles, I’ll get some hired goons, and we’ll take you out for a beer at one of the best pubs in the city. If anyone tries to fuck with you, those hired goons will kick their punk asses while we exchange high-fives. It will be sweet!
In the mean time, when someone gets in your face about the Cubs losing, you can say, “Hey! Wil Wheaton says back the fuck off!”
When they look confused and say, “Who the hell is Wil Wheaton?” you can just smile and laugh at them, because you know something they don’t.
Rock on,
Wil Wheaton
Life-long Cubs Fan,
living in Los Angeles
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A pox on That Guy. Just kidding. A horrible thing happened to him. No matter what he did, the media had no right to give out personal information like that. You totally hit it dead on.
Oh, by the way……GO SOX!!!
*raises hand*
I want to be a hired goon!
🙂
That was one mighty fine open letter. I’m in complete agreement.
Wil-
You’re the man. Very well said.
Cyclometh
Amen, my brother!
Dude, you got a comment from Bruce Baugh. You rawk.
BTW, totally agreed.
I very, very much agree.
You’re just living your life, and then, POW, you’re in the middle of one of those Southwest Airlines “Wanna Get Away” commercials.
It’s going to be a while before That Guy’s life gets back to normal. It’s not like he willed the bill to come in his general direction.
hln
Wil:
Great and hilarious letter! The part about you scaring your dogs made me laugh out loud, though I am trying to be quiet to not wake the kids. My parents are incredibly loud baseball fans, and it reminded me of when I was younger, walking past my house and hearing them inside, cheering on the game. Embarassed me in front of my friends. Good times.
Well said, Wil. The guy did what fans do, and given the level of playing that went on before that catch, he has nothing to be sorry about. The fans who berate him and the media jackals who fed on their hatred ought to be ashamed of themselves.
Well said. I hope that the content of your letter somehow reaches Thay Guy through the vast internet grapevine. I also hope the media are ashamed of themselves.
Fantastic letter. I agree completely-it is unfair, mean-spirited, disrespectful what media did to That Guy. Same with fans who want to use him as a scapegoat.
well said mr. wheaton!…blind hatred is what causes wars and feuds to go on and on…a little understanding goes a long way towards healing the world.
Allow me to just add on my kudos for a well thought out generous offer of support. I hope That Guy takes it to heart.
Dude! I printed this out to pass round at work. You’re getting free advertizing and we’re getting awesomes joy out of your open letter to that guy.
No one here at work knew about the Goat. It’s the goat’s fault, not that guy.
Though I do live in Chicago, I’m not from here; I’m from Nebraska and I do know something about rabid fans. I am shocked, however, at the absolute vitriol being spouted by the local media towards ‘that guy’ and his actions. He’s been called stupid, he’s been called ignorant, and he’s been called out BY THE MEDIA and the fans.
First, the media is to blame not just for telling us all who he is, but perpetuating and increasing the irrational hatred towards him. Chicago sports talk radio came very close to calling for the formation of a lynch mob.
Second, fans are to blame for having no perspective on what is, after all, just a game. I am not a Cubs fan, but no matter how much you love ‘your’ team (and I grew up a Husker fan in a family of Husker fans) it’s still just a game. Love the game, leave the hatred for a fellow fan out of your life.
“That thing that makes a sports fan wear only paint and a diaper to a ball game when it’s 15 degrees outside? It’s the same thing that makes a Star Trek fan wear the same unwashed uniform for 5 days in a row at a big ass con.”
That cracked me up. Die hard sports fans would be horrified to see themselves compared to Star Trek fans. I’m still laughing about it.
As for That Guy, my local (Atlanta) DJs were talking about him and how ridiculous all this crap is. The DJs were especially critical of the media who are continuing to publish the story and use That Guy’s real name. Thankfully, like Wil, my local DJs were able to discuss the situation without giving out That Guy’s real name. Isn’t there any responsibility attached to journalism anymore?
Yes, I had my heart broken in game 6, cuz’ I knew after that, they would lose the series…you know, cuz’ they’re the freakin Cubs!! But in NO WAY was that fan to blame. Actually, I blame the radio commentator Pat Hughes. “That guy” had earphones on listening to WGN Radio play-by-play. Why didn’t he tell them to ‘back off–Moises is coming!!’ But seriously, it’s no one’s fault but the professionals that should have held it together. I’m totally depressed, I think I’ll go start the car, and just not raise that pesky door.
Yes, I had my heart broken in game 6, cuz’ I knew after that, they would lose the series…you know, cuz’ they’re the freakin Cubs!! But in NO WAY was that fan to blame. Actually, I blame the radio commentator Pat Hughes. “That guy” had earphones on listening to WGN Radio play-by-play. Why didn’t he tell them to ‘back off–Moises is coming!!’ But seriously, it’s no one’s fault but the professionals that should have held it together. I’m totally depressed, I think I’ll go start the car, and just not raise that pesky door.
Sorry for that guys, my computer freaked out!!
I’m normally not a god-type guy, but I truly hope and pray that nothing bad happens to this poor guy because of this media circus. If something does end up happening, I feel that the heartless bastards that published that guy’s name and personal info are held liable for their actions. This is one of the most irresponsible acts of journalism I’ve ever seen. It’s like the Chicago news media is dumping kerosene on an already out of control fire. The game was lost on the field (by shaky cubs defense…go figure), not on a foul ball in the stands. I sure hope that guy can forgive himself for his mistake, there’s no way he could’ve known to do different.
I’m normally not a god-type guy, but I truly hope and pray that nothing bad happens to this poor guy because of this media circus. If something does end up happening, I feel that the heartless bastards that published that guy’s name and personal info are held liable for their actions. This is one of the most irresponsible acts of journalism I’ve ever seen. It’s like the Chicago news media is dumping kerosene on an already out of control fire. The game was lost on the field (by shaky cubs defense…go figure), not on a foul ball in the stands. I sure hope that guy can forgive himself for his mistake, there’s no way he could’ve known to do different.
Agreed!
Poor That Guy. He loves his Cubs, goes to the game, and the next thing he knows he’s the Most Hated Person in Chicago(TM), because he’s at the wrong place at the wrong time. I hope folks in Chicago will back off from their collective insanity and let That Guy go back to his life. If not, I think That Guy can find asylum in lots of places around this country.
“I used to be on this big cult TV show that had lots of very passionate fans. Many of those fans absolutely (and irrationally) hated the character I played on that show.”
::confused:: William Shatner wrote this?
Well said Wil. It’s just a game, last time I looked anyway. People don’t get it. We still have American soldiers dying everyday in Iraq. Get a grip on reality.
Go Wil! Great letter!
Wil, that letter was farkin’ awesome. Thank you for writing it. It reminds me of the Red Sox ’86 Bil Buckner error – everybody blames Buckner for losing the game, but if I remember, it was the lame-ass relief pitcher that had already allowed the tying run, so even if Buckner did make the play, the Sox wouldn’t have won anyway. Lyons, was the pitcher’s name I believe. Anyway, Wil, you rock and keep up the good work!
Barry Ingram
What gets me is that if you watch the tape- everyone around That Guy was reaching for the ball too. It could have been anyone. And the dude sitting beside him stated that they could not see the outfielder running at them until the very end when they just saw his glove pop up. That Guy did not lose the game for the Cubs, the CUBS did.
While at first I was disgusted at That Guy, now my disgust is directed at the media (where it normally rests) and all of the assholes who think that sports is so damn important that it is worth harrassing and threatening a person’s life. These are the same idiots who threatened Kobe’s accuser. Get a clue!!!
Thanks, Wil, for the opportunity to speak my mind about this!
Wil – I am so glad that someone else is sticking up for That Guy. What the media and other rabid fans is doing to him is totally uncalled for. If they want to blame someone, then they should blame the players. They didn’t get it together. And why not be happy that the Cubs got as far as they did? That in and of itself is a great thing. Hang in there That Guy. And don’t stop coaching your Little League Team!
Well said! I couldn’t agree more!
At first I was mad about this guy messing up that play and ultimatly the game. The announcers of the game helped that along just fine. Although they did point out that just about everyone else within 50 feet of where the ball came down at had people trying to catch it.
I then realized that “That Guy” had no idea that Alou was anywhere near catching it himself. When you are at a game, you are glued to the batter trying to see if the pitch was a ball or strike. When it’s hit and it’s heading your way, your fixed on the ball for a couple of reasons. One, you want to catch it if you can, and two, you need to protect yourself if you are sitting in range of a foul ball or fair ball being hit into the stands. A baseball can hurt if it hits you.
All “That Guy” was doing was what every baseball fan everywhere does when a ball is headed his way.
What really makes me sick is that I would put odds that he is going to lose his job over this. Not to mention his life will be all but destroyed. All thanks to the wonderful news media, yet again. Those happy-go-lucky people who report news for one reason and one reason only, RATINGS! What a bunch of slimeballs!
“That Guy” is going to be the most hated resident of Chicago since Mrs Oleary’s cow. At least for the short term.
Not because he deserves the blame but because Cub fans have a need to blame someone for their disapointment. It’s easier to blame him because somewhere deep down they can dream “If Only”.
If “That Guy” has a sense of humor ,once this all dies down he should hang three pictures in his office. One of the Hindenburg , One of the Titanic , and one of him trying to catch that foul ball.
It’ll be an instant conversation starter.
Wil,
*bravo* *applause* I really hope that this poor soul eventually gets beyond this. How frightening to think that one dream moment (because what fan doesn’t dream of catching a ball?) in this poor fan’s day has changed his life forever. And I heard he didn’t even get to keep the lousy ball! I hope this letter makes it to him, and that it brings him some measure of happiness. Thanks for posting what so many of us are feeling Wil
Wil,
I’m not a baseball fan; I didn’t see the game.
I have been to games before and yes, EVERYONE tries to catch a foul coming their way.
We need to start a “That Guy” fan club and get some media attention for it.
God I hate the media.
Assholes! What do they teach these people in journalism classes anyway? Obviously they aren’t learning ethics.
–Jessie–
Bastard, Wheaton. There goes my open letter to that guy.
Just make sure he knows that by “Los Angeles” you mean “Old Town Pasedena” and by “best bars in the city” you mean “Lucky Baldwins” and that you’re at least not misleading on the second part!
Heh.
AMEN Wil! People in Chicago need to think about what they are doing to this poor guy. He is more devistated than the team is, I assure you.
Thanks for saying what the rest of us were thinking! Ethics seems to be a foreign language to these journalists. The man didn’t commit a crime…he did what most of America dreams about!
Go Yankees! We need someone that can beat those dastardley Marlins! How dare they play with hearts like Lions?! How dare they take away what is rightfully the Cubs!?
cmon, the story is not about “that guy”. the story is not about the Cubs losing…the story is about the Phenomenal comeback that the Marlins staged!
GO YANKEES!
Go Yankees! We need someone that can beat those dastardley Marlins! How dare they play with hearts like Lions?! How dare they take away what is rightfully the Cubs!?
cmon, the story is not about “that guy”. the story is not about the Cubs losing…the story is about the Phenomenal comeback that the Marlins staged!
GO YANKEES!
I’m waaaaaay over here in Japan, and the news is just as big here. Just to add a bit of international perspective, a random sampling of Japanese baseball fans revealed no hate or bombast, just pity for poor That Guy.
All of us here in chicago agreed That Guy deserves a little heckling and maybe a smack upside the head…from his friends. The publishing of his name in the Sun Times just about made us all sick.
Oh, and the Cubs lost because they presumed Sunday’s game to be no big deal, and I think they wanted to win it in Chicago. After that, it was all downhill. That, and the insane desire to make every hit a home run. *sigh*
Wait
Until
Next
Year
Well said, That shit is sooo farked up.
1. The crack about your wife and the batboy made me laugh – hard.
2. Can we PLEASE start to do away with “high-fives”?
When the Pretender in Chief starts to get into the act, it’s time to do something else.
I would much rather see a firm handshake that starts somewhere behind the plane of your shoulder and ends in a slap and a good grip instead of jumping in the air and trying to slap someone else’s hand and winding up hitting them on the head and then falling and spraining your ankle.
Of course that didn’t happen to me.
But let’s try, okay?
Loved the bit about the bat boy – you’re funny! Well said though – when I was a kid, I spent two years waiting for the Tigers to send a foul ball into the upper deck first base line, and it never seemed to happen, at least not while I was there. (of course, that was in the days when the Tigers actually hit the ball every now and then)
I am just wondering at what point in time it stopped being just a game. I mean win or lose it’s still entertainment on some level. Whether your waiting for “next year” or whether your team won. It’s all in the thrill of the moment. The outcome is secondary to the enjoyment of the game.
I heart Wil!
I heart the Cubbies!
I heart “That Guy”!
Bah. If you ask me, the Cubs player (AKA “That Other Guy”) was going to miss the catch anyhow. That Guy isn’t to blame for anything.
AAAAAAAAAMEN!
That was the coolest. gesture. ever.
Nicely done, Wil – I really think you should submit your letter to the Editor of the Chicago Sun-Times.
Heh. Wil said “big ass con”.
I think that if I ever find myself organizing a sci-fi convention, I will name it the Big Ass Con. In memoriam.