I’m almost finished with my first *real* rewrite of Just A Geek. I’m right up to just about the end, when I found out that I got cut from Nemesis, and how I dealt with it. After that, there’s really just two brief chapters to clean up (mostly cutting a LOT of stuff out, plus some minor rewriting) before I write a whole new chapter that talks about Dancing Barefoot, and some of the stuff that’s happened since I finished the first draft of Just A Geek over a year ago.
It looks like I’m going to make my April 2 deadline! w00t!
So. I am a little fuzzy on some stuff, and I’ve been reading lots of old comment threads, to help jog my memory. I noticed a TON of comment spam in some of the old stuff, so I was manually deleting some things . . . and I just now came across an entry that I started, marked as a “draft” and never finished.
I have no idea what story I was going to tell here, but I thought it was kind of cool. An “unfinished symphony,” if I may be so bold.
It looks like I wrote this on June 21, 2002, at 11PM. It’s untitled.
Growing up, we never had very much.
We were poor white trash from The Valley, but my parents never let us know that. They never once made us aware of precisely how little we had, or how many sacrifices they must have made just to give my brother, sister and me birthday and Christmas presents.
I lived in a small and very unassuming house in the northeastern San Fernando valley community called Sunland/Tujunga. Back in the late 70s and early to mid 80s, our claim to fame was being a regular location for the hit TV series CHiPs.
Around 1982, one of the numerous times CHiPs was filming in our neighborhood, the kid next door (Steven, who was always putting his hand in his pants) rode his Huffy over The Big Hill, went over to the set, and returned with autographed photos of Larry “John Baker” Wilcox and Erik “Ponch” Estrada. Steven’s sister Tina was a few years older than we were and she was quite taken with Ponch. So I sold my autographed picture of Ponch to her for 5 bucks.
I guess 5 bucks had become synonymous with real wealth in my young mind, since it was the value of my precious Death Star, and I felt great pride shaking down Tina, extorting 5 glorious dollars from her in exchange for the picture that I didn’t care about having, anyway.
That 5 bucks went into a fund, which eventually was used to purchase an Atari 2600 at KMART. It came with Combat and 2 joystick controllers, and Invisible Tank Pong with the most walls remains one of my favorite games to this day.
I tell you this because I’ve just been hit with a painfully lucid memory of being 10 years old, sitting on the shag carpeting of our family’s den in Sunland, playing that Atari 2600.
That memory was brought on when I was sitting here, just an hour ago, playing Circus Atari on an Atari 2600 emulator.
I loved Circus Atari, but we didn’t have it, because playing it required the purchase of paddle controllers, which my parents just couldn’t afford.
But Kent Purser, one of The Cool Kids, had Circus Atari, and I always hoped for the casual invitation to come to his house on the weekend, and play it with him…
Maybe I was going to talk about Atari? Or how I never fit in with the cool kids? I can’t recall if I was invited to Kent’s house or not. I *do* remember an invite to this kid Steven’s house to watch Jaws on Beta, where the Cool Kids all ended up playing Atari and never gave me a turn (and we never watched the movie) . . . Maybe it was going to be something about how we were super poor White Trash when I was a kid, but my parents never let us “feel” poor? I have no idea. But I thought, “Hey, this is kind of cool,” when I saw it.
So there.
Goddammit. I’m supposed to be working, and all I want to do is go play Yars Revenge.
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Wil, put down those damn video games and get back to work! I mean it! I will turn this car around!! No, really…that’s a cool memory. Maybe it was meant to be one of those stream of consciousness type things. You’re a hard one to figure, sometimes, Wheaton…but it’s funny when you try.
Maybe you were trying to make everyone else nostalgic for their childhood. You’ve succeeded in my case, because now I am busting out my Atari emulator and putting on the Pixies.
My Atari 2600 memories are full and thick. Can’t think of anything as cool as renting “River Raid” and finding I couldn’t finish it in one weekend. My favorites included tank, the parachute game, and those awful versions of pac-man and asteroids. Pitfall was so cool, but I didn’t get my copy until after I was bored with it. Bought my 2600 at Adray’s on Wilshire (gone now, used to be the Crazy Gideons of it’s day) with a handful of games. I played that thing into the ground, until I sold my still working console about the time I got my first computer in ’86. Those Apple IIc’s were the bomb! Not as cool as a vic 20, but still radical!
Wil,
I wonder: isn’t it a form of work when you blog? Or… maybe you are also getting something out of it that makes it not just work?
It took me a while to realize what \m/ was!
Monkey Gone To Heaven is my favorite Pixies song. I just came across your website today, and I was sold without even having to read very far. I had an atari when i was little even when it was way out of date. My family was pretty much the only family in the neighborhood without nintendo….but we were also the only family in the neighborhood that didnt steal. I, sadly, had to shoot ducks on the t.v. in someone else’s house (sniff, sniff).
For God’s Sake Man! Play. Play like you never played before!
But only for 10 minute. Then get back to work. It’s not fair you playing while we all work. 🙂
When I was that age, no one ever let me have a turn on the controller either, and my parents couldn’t afford an NES, so I spent the 80’s watching people beat my favorite games that I had never played. That memory made me emotional all of a sudden. =(
Hey Wil… I’ve still got an Atari VCS [what they called it before calling it the 2600], with paddles AND driving paddles, lol. It’s in the garage in a box right now in Cypress.
If I recall correctly… I’ve got TWO sets of paddles. You want one set? I’d just HAFTA hook it all up and test it out for functionality, of course, lol. Activision’s Kaboom was the simplest, most funnest paddle game EVER!
P.S. Got an Atari 5200 & trackball controller, too. Man, I’ve old. [36 in a month]
uh… assuming the slight chance you still have your 2600, lol. and nice typo, Ed… “… I’ve old”??? Maybe arthritis or Alzheimers is manifesting itself.
Rec’d my copy of Dancing Barefoot from barnes & noble.com a couple days back… wonderful storytelling, Wil. That’s for all but the Sponge Bob story… I’m saving that read for a block of time when I won’t be interupted by life.
Now, let’s hope that my gambling nature that leads me to NOT proof read my posts, will not make me look foolish. Again.
Damn it Wheaton, now you’ve got me all nostalgic.
If it makes you feel any better, I never even got an Atari – I got the generic “Gemini” system (I don’t even know how I remember that name). I think my sweetest techy-childhood memories were of my Commodore 64: I LOVED that computer, and had it until 10th grade (when I upgraded to an Atari ST! ha!).
I used to program my Commodore to emulate strobe lighting while me and my best friend danced to Janet Jackson in front of each other…ah, I’m getting swept up in a wave of embarrassing nostalgia! So, I guess I’ll just end this for now!
From the first sentence I’m completely drawn in. Surely the sign of a great writer. I too was poor “white trash” and to this day I can’t even use that term in a joking fashion around my Mom because it hits too close to home. They always tried to hide it from me but to this day I don’t think they feel they did enough, or were god enough. If you think it troubled you as a kid I wonder how your folks felt.
Ohhhh Atari. I remember my first time with it was when I was what, five or six I think, at my friend Jessie’s house – she and her brother had gotten one for Christmas, along with Frogger. I remember sitting down and playing Frogger for what seemed like a little while and then being interrupted by her mother, who wanted to know if we’d like to go outside and play. She was answered by two half-blank monotone ‘no’s from the zombie children on her carpet. *g*
I miss that Atari. Also – go work on the book, man. I want to read the book. Give me the book. *continues whining*
Hey Wil, have you tried MT-Blacklist? It will get rid of that comment spam in a hurry.
OMG!!! I don’t think I’ve thought about Yars Revenge in, um, 20 years. :} That was my favorite Atari game until we got Pac-Man. 🙂 I was really good at it (though not as good as I was on Pac-Man).
Thanks so much for bringing up such wonderful memories!
Dammit, Wil… I’m only 16, and you’re making ME nostalgiac. *grr*
So, I’ve been wanting to mention this for a while. I’m a member of LASFS, and I really enjoyed hearing you speak the times you were there, and getting to talk to you. I was wondering if you were interested in coming back at some point. Not even necessaruky as Wil Wheaton, Famous Actor And Weblogger, but as Wil Wheaton, fanboy. You’d be accepted that way, and I think you’d really enjoy hanging out with some of the people there.
Don’t want to seem like I’m trying to coerce you or anything, I’d just really like an opportunity to hang out with you a bit, and to let you see all the interesting people there. And to let you know that you don’t have to have an agenda to stop by, you’re welcome any time you want to show up.
Just-as-big-a-fanboy-as-you,
Ben Massoglia,
LASFS Registrar
Dude! You should get one of those Atari 10-in-1 joysticks that ThinkGeek is selling! They have Circus Atari AND Yar’s Revenge!
I’m sorry, but I read the title of your post and now have “…and God is seven!” going through my head 🙂
the pixies rock \m/ even though they were kinda before my time since i’m only a “kid”
JOUST!
*dies*
No kidding, the nostalgia’s killing me too. But on a completely different note:
If you’ve come here looking for a washed-up, former child actor, I guess you could find that. But if you’re willing to look beyond the surface, and challenge your preconceptions, you will get to know me for who I am now: a very happy husband, step-father, and writer.
When I was told about your place, I headed over fully expecting cornballing/attention whoring not unlike that of Danny Bonaduce’s paying-to-get-an-infomercial-slot “late night talkshow.”
And I was wrong. Quite pleasantly wrong. Best wishes to you, the family, and the multiple political causes you’ve decided to take up.
Yars Revenge…boy do I feel old now. Heh. Wil, go play a game or two. Just don’t forget to get back to your writing. :^)
Never cared that much for video games, except for Tempest. Man did I love that game! And I was good at it too. Unlike all the other games I tried.
My parents divorced when I was 9 (the same summer Star Wars came out, that movie defined my childhood) and thanks to my hick mother, we lived like white trash and didn’t have to. She moved us once a year, every year, in the MIDDLE of the school year so I was always the new kid. I know where you’re coming from when you write about the ‘cool’ kids and feeling a bit left out.
I know, I know, “get your own damn blog!” I would but I’m afraid it would end up as a ‘I-hate-my-mother’ and ‘my-lazy-husband’, and who the hell wants to read that? LOL
You’re always cool in my book, Wil! Now get your ass back to work! 🙂
Atari … yikes. My older brothers were Atari fanatics and would only let me and my sister play every once in a while … I miss those fleeting moments where I was allowed to bask in the quiet glow of Pong.
I know the feeling of being poor but not being made to FEEL poor … parents are weird like that — so concerned with the bullshit social standings of an 8 year old who has to wear hand-me-downs to school everyday.
Write about that Wil … I wanna read more about that.
hey wil,
yey! i love your writing, as i have told you many many times! can’t wait to read JAG! good luck with the rest of it!!
take care
rach
thanks for the great flashback. heh – i have an old baseball-style jersey (white w/yellow sleeves if you must know) that has a “larry wilcox as JOHN,” and his super-cute mug on it in a classic fabbo 70s glitter iron-on on the front. i’m desperately trying to lose another couple pounds so i can wear it proudly. as for video games, l have the ol’ atari 2600 ready for hookup some day, and i’ve been collecting cartridges for it. in the meantime, i have the full-on, upright tempest arcade machine to keep me happy. old school video games RULE. it’s good to be an adult with a kid’s taste in toys…
Wil,
Speaking of poor white trash, my dad grew up during the Great Depression of the l930’s. He said sometimes all they had to eat was tomato ketchup. I grew up in the l950’s and loved every minute of it. We had no air conditioning and 99%
humidity (Louisiana) but didn’t give it a second thought. Nobody had AC. We were poor and white but the word “trash” just doesn’t fit.
Thanks again for sharing your life with us. And
go buy yourself an AC. Your kids will love you for it.
Freeman 🙂
Please explain the \m/. Thanks.
.
Yars Revenge! I forgot all about that game! Back when it came out, it was “THE game”. I too have super fond memories of the 2600, also playing on the shag carpet (but comfortably sitting in my bean bag chair!) I wish I still had my 2600. I remember being blown away when Pitfall 2 came out. I thought it was the ultimate achievement in graphics, sound, and animation!
Being a 34-year old geek myself, the wife fulfilled my nostalgia by getting me the Atari 10-in-1 last Christmas, nearly reducing me to tears. My personal weakness is Adventure–Level 3, which I must admit to playing for about 5 hours straight last Saturday night. Ah, to be a tween again.
Well, Wil, I must have been one of those “rich kids” then…we had an Intellivision and what must have been most of the cartridges for it. I’d like to think that I’d have invited you over to play a few rounds of Star Strike, Astrosmash, Baseball, or Utopia, though. Or even B-17 Bomber, with the voice synthesizer. (One of these days I need to get the two discs full of the emulated games. I wish there were a good Intellivision emulator for Linux.)
Oh, and I tried to find Dancing Barefoot at a B&N on my way home today, but couldn’t…has it shipped yet?
I thought you were an actor.
~confused~
Oh my GOSH! Get up, Yars Revenge! I loved that game, and Frogger and some Jungle game where you had to jump vines and crocodiles.
Space Invaders also rocked, as did the ever cool Q-Bert, which i still see in arcades from time to time. There’s one in Santa Cruz Man, i could whomp on Q-Bert… =)
Darn it… took me years to get over my obsession with Yar’s Revenge… finally had to stop when my controllers died. None of the booths in the local flea markets had replacements. *sigh*
Just shows how much farther I have to go before I can really consider myself a geek. The fact I never even considered an emulator to indulge my passions…
Must find an Intellivision emulator too.. I liked most of those games even more than the Atari ones. But again… the controllers died.
I dunno, maybe you posted it so we’d know that you actually had to work to get where you were. To show that you didn’t just happen to be the son of someone who rubbed elbows with someone who cleaned some studio executive’s pool..maybe you just wanted to show that you’ve earned what you got, and never had anything handed to you. Maybe you just wanted to show that you, like the rest of us, are “Just a Human”…still putting your pants on one leg at a time, and sitting on the porcelin throne like the rest of us…
At least, that’s what I got out of it. In a way, some of us have nots are insanely jealous of those we percieve to be “haves”. In a way, its good to know that you were raised knowing the value of a dollar. This, again, speaks to why you didn’t end up like your co-stars, sucked into a world of excess and abuse.
Your parents taught you manners, responsibility, and the value of working hard and saving money.
Thanks for sharing that with us. You didn’t have to, and we wouldn’t have been any the wiser. You’re not “just a geek” but you’re human too.
Keep writing.
Dude, that brought back so many memories! Circus Atari was my favorite Atari games ever. My cousin and I used to sit around and play that for hours. For some morbid reason, laughing our heads off at the little pixellated guy splattering at the bottom of the screen never got old…
Wil,
I grew up living in a trailer most of my life, with my mother having to raise myself and my brother alone, it was all she could afford. She worked three jobs just to make ends meet, and to make sure we had what was needed. I had my writing, gaming, and some sports. I was a skinny little girl who was picked on occasionally, but was well liked by all the boys(most played D&D), and disliked by most of the girls.
I do not mind comming from a poor back ground, because I would not be who I am today. I am Mom to Gaelen who is two and Elijah who is one, and I have been married for two wonderful years. I am always striving to become more and am very happy with who I am. I turn 31 April 2nd and am looking forward to publishing my first book. Wil…you have been instrumental in my growth, as a writer. Thank you for being so cool, and posting your experiences, and just being a regular guy.
P.S. I still have my original Atari 2600 with box included still in mint condition. My favorite game was Pitfall. That game was rockin.
um…… i didnt know what a computer was until i was 11 and we got a spectrum then i couldnt play it cause my brother wouldnt let me thought it was a joint xmas present…. *hears distant sounds of load up screeching* i never knew we were poor either… now i think my poor parents had enough to contend with without me and my brother going at eachother fists flying!
Wil, i look forward to JAG… Bless you! you are so awesome!
*waves to KC..*
hugs
Andrea x
Chill Wil,
Rumination is all part of the writing process. There’s no reason you have to be chained to the computer 24/7.
Well, 23/7 maybe. We want your book real bad…
Reminded me of my childhood. Going over to friend’s houses who weren’t quite friends and playing with their more-expensive than mine toys. And now thinking…I don’t know what I’m thinking but nonetheless this was a good entry.
You pulled some interesting memories out for me with that excerpt, Wil.
I had two geeky kids in the late ’60s. My son was two years older than his sister, my first girl. When they got to be about 9 or 10, Atari home consoles were introduced. For some reason, video games were genderized as a ‘boy toy’, but that did not stop my daughter from trying to grab a little air time, too. Sometimes the wrangling was intense!
Our family had its ‘feasts and famines’ and in 1976 that Christmas was a ‘feast time’ for us. We were able to get two small black and white TVs and two Ataris for them. One for each of their rooms.
No longer was “Go to your room!” much of a punishment.
One day, I sat with my daughter and explored one of their game pacs (Asteroids?) and I remember something about finding a magic ring in a secret room. I felt so proud.
Both kids went on to D&D and AD&D, into PoPnet/IRC and then into on-line muds, etc. Fortunately for them, personal computers were in our house early enough for them both to become teenage programming masters.
Now I am proud to say, although they are grown up and live northeast, south and west across America, three generations of us meet on-line and still game together several times a week.
I agree that squeezing pennies is not a totally bad experience for growing kids. Appreciation for the decisions that have to be made has long lasting impact.
Hug your parents, they did a great job in instilling your values, particularly your compassion.
Wow, that brought back memories. Not of childhood, but of WWDN when I first started visiting. I suppose that shows how your writing style’s developed. 🙂
Back then, I always thought your style sounded *just* like Richard Dreyfuss being the Grown-Up Gordie. In fact, I wonder if that’s where you got your wonderfully evocative wistfulness from…
Well Wil, now YOU are one of the cool kids! I’ve been waiting for a casual invitation from you to come over to hang out and play video games, but it just doesn’t come. Maybe I’ll get invited to your next birthday party.
Circus Atari and Yars Revenge? Please.
No wonder you weren’t one of the cool kids!
We were all playing Ping Pong, Asteroids, and Raiders of the Lost Arc. And still are 😉
-Scott
TwoPeanuts.com
Been listening to your Pixies collection? 😉
It was a sad day when they went their separate ways.
I once played circus atari until I peed my pants.
Then God is seven…then God is seven…
Damn, I love the Pixies…
-gregory
Wil, I’m not a gamer, I read this site because I love the way you write. But I have one up on you all. I grew up in the Silicon Valley and I KNOW THE GUY WHO WROTE YAR’S REVENGE!!!! God Bless Howard!
At least you had a 2600 fanboy. I had to play text adventure games on the TRS-80 that they had at my magnet school. It didn’t even tell you the available directions. “Stop! Infidel Dog!”
Of course, that memory there reminds me of the time I was dared to stick a bent paperclip into an electrical outlet. I pulled it off, flickering the lights of the school and causing the rug to singe. To this day I have no idea why *I* didn’t burn up… Ah, the power of innocence. I did have to write “I will not stick things in electrical outlets.” something like 500 times on the chalk board.
Funny. The last Michael Jackson record where he wasn’t completely off the wall was “Off The Wall”.
Thanks for the memories… Although I preferred Miner 2049er on my dad’s friends Colecovision. That game was RAD.
What memories! This entry took me back to a time when the world made sense before it got so damn confusing. I remember my Atari 2600 and how all was right with the world with games like Pitfall,Megamania, hell,even Journey Escape (I always made sure I was Steve Perry!)!
Wil I’m going to say this now because there’s no better time than now (and I haven’t even read Dancing Barefoot to qualify what I want to say) but I am officially going to make you the voice of Generation X. You write so passionatley of your days growing up and when you reflect on all things the 80’s, you nail it. Just this very blog entry is proof of that. Your struggles and the few bright lights you come to at the end of the tunnels are at best describing life’s little achievements but for us they are monumental!
God bless you Wil in everything that comes your way. And thanks for taking me back to a time I remember fondly and wish sometimes I could revisit.
Reminds me of the time that I was over at my friends house and he just got Ghostbusters for the C64. My friend played a couple games and when it was my turn the cool kids came over and were allowed to take my turn playing. They kept playing and playing and I never got my chance. The game looked cool at the time, and the incident caused me to drift away from the friendship I had. Thanks for the story I haven’t thought about that in a long time. Keeps one grounded. Oh, anyone know if Ghostbusters for the C64 was really that good?
Wil,
Your “unfinished symphony” is really cool, like all the stuff you write at WWDN. Talking reminiscences, I know that “Stand by Me” is part of your past now, but I’ve just watched it last night on cable TV and smiled at the scene where Gordie tells his friends a story by the fire. That’s how I feel reading your work here: everything is so amusing and magic, it’s a real pleasure.
Ok, maybe part of this feeling is due to the fact that you still are “Wesley Crusher” here in Brazil (Star Trek New Generation is still airing every Saturday and the last season was never showed here), or maybe it’s just the great coincidence that we were both born July 29th… but most of the entertainment comes from your stimulating writing.
I hope to see “Dancing Barefoot” in brazilian stores soon – unfortunately I can’t import it, it would cost three times more. Well, that’s it for now. I hope that my english isn’t so bad… maybe if you show up at my weblog some day and leave an encouraging comment, I’ll participate here more often. 😉
– Paulinhakz
Sao Paulo, Brazil
Concili