symphony in c

Anne worked late tonight, and I was too lazy to cook dinner, so I took the kids to a local hole-in-the-wall Mexican joint where we all love to eat. Especially when it means an opportunity to get away from “all that stupid healthfood” I like to cook (according to Nolan).
Ryan told me about a debate he had in school about media, and how media influences people, especially children. I realize that I’m not the most impartial observer here, but I was very impressed with the clarity of his arguments, and his responses to my challenges. In the end, we decided that media is a big influence in kid’s lives, but so are their parents (or at least, they should be.)
Nolan tuned us out most of dinner, and watched the NCAA tournament on a TV that hangs in the back of the restaurant, but he did add, “I think that kids want to be cool, and they see these people on MTV, like Outkast and Britney Spears, and the kids see how much attention they are getting, so they want to be like them. So the kids can think they’re cool.”
Like I said, I’m not the most impartial observer here, but I was impressed again by the depth of his thinking.
On the way to the car after dinner, Ryan said, “Hey, Wil, can we go . . . somewhere?”
“Somewhere? What do you mean?”
“I mean, anywhere that’s not home. I just want to hang out.”
“Yeah,” Nolan said, “I want to just hang out, too.”
I thought for a second about where we could go to just hang out. Before I could answer, Ryan said, “Hey! Why don’t we go home and play D&D?!”
I winced. “Oh man, I would love to do that, but I have been working so much, I haven’t had time to finish the adventure. I’ll work on it over the weekend, I promise.”
“Are you working a lot, now?” Nolan asked.
“Yeah, I guess I am.” The answer surprised me. “I’m on a deadline for Just A Geek, and I’m doing publicity for Dancing Barefoot . Plus, I got a job writing a monthly column for a magazine, and a bi-monthly column for another one.”
“Wow. That’s a lot of work,” he said.
I smiled. “Yeah, it is, isn’t it?! I didn’t realize that. Plus, this animation thing seems to be picking up.”
“That’s cool,” Nolan said, as we all piled into my car. “Does that mean we get to put air conditioning in our house?”
We’ve suffered through five brutal summers without A/C, and every time we think we’re going to get it, something unexpected comes up, and we buy a 15 dollar fan instead.
“Yeah. I think it does. We’ll have to see what the royalties are next quarter.” I pulled away from the curb.
“So . . . can we go do something? Ryan said.
“Yes. Yes we can.” I said.
“Oh! What?!” He said.
“Yeah! What?!” Nolan said.
“We can . . .” I paused dramatically, “Go to,” another pause, “the carwash!”
In unison, they said, “Oh man!”
I laughed. “C’mon! It’ll be an event. I haven’t washed my car in two months.”
Before they could say anything, I dug up the most saccharine voice I could muster and said, “I really want you guys to be part of this.”
We all laughed, and turned up XM. It was Rush played “Limelight” on Top Tracks.
“What the hel– er, heck is this?” Ryan said.
I affected a gasp. “Ryan, it’s RUSH! Your mom hates Rush, so whenever she’s not in the car, I crank it up.”
And I did. I cranked it up, and sang:
“Living in the limelight
The universal dream
For those who wish to seem
Those who wish to be
Must put aside the alienation,
Get on with the fascination,
The real relation,
The underlying theme.”
Then there was much air guitar, and drumming on my dashboard.
In a dry voice, Ryan said, “Yeah, you see, this sort of undermines your whole, ‘your parents influence you’ thing that you said at dinner.”
I held up a finger, finished a drum solo, and turned the radio down.
“What do you mean?” I said.
“I mean . . .” he paused. I looked over at him and saw his brow furrow. “I mean, kids at school tell me I’m funny, and my teachers tell me I’m a good writer. I obviously get that from you.”
He said it with total nonchalance, like it was just an accepted fact.
It took every ounce of self-control I have in my body and soul to not burst into tears. Ryan’s never told me that he gets anything from me. For most of our life together, there’s been an unspoken distance, a gap that I didn’t open, but could only be closed by him. In that moment, Ryan built a bridge. I don’t know how long it will stay there, but I intend to cross it every chance I get.
“Wil?”
“What?”
“Did you hear me?”
Of course, I was off in the magic land of Stepparentia, and I did not.
“Sorry, I was . . . thinking about something,” I said. “Tell me again.”
“I said that I obviously get my musical tastes from my mom. Except for the emo stuff that you like, and Cake.” He frowned. “Okay, so maybe I just get my 80s musical tastes from my mom.” He frowned again. “Okay, what I mean is, I have gotten a lot of influences from both of you.”
From both of you.
I nodded my head, and swallowed around the lump in my throat. “I think I get it.”
“Hey, when this song is over, can I put in a CD?” He said.
“Yeah! Put in a CD!” Nolan said.
I looked back at him in the rearview mirror. “Sorry, Wil,” he said, “but Rush sucks.”
I chuckled. “You are totally your mother’s son.”
The song ended, and Ryan put Comfort Eagle into the CD player. He skipped ahead to the title track, and the three of us sang along together.
“He is in the music business
He is calling you DUDE!”
We pulled into the Chevron station where the carwash is located.
“I’ll be right back, you guys.” I hopped out of the car, and ran in to buy my ticket.
I wish I could hear the attendant tell the story of the guy who came in tonight and wiped tears from his eyes while he ordered “The Works.”

170 thoughts on “symphony in c”

  3. Lovely Wil, just lovely. I always like to hear when you talk about your stepkids. I’m not quite sure how the relationship dynamic goes when you have a stepdad, but the kids really seem to have taken you on as a father, even if you aren’t their “father father”. It’s really cool to hear about it.

  5. Excellent story! And for crying out loud, close the sweat shop, and my an AC for the house. And one more thing, is the carwash, like going on space mountain at Disney land, or is it like the old Capt. Eeo attraction.

  7. God, Wil. That’s just amazing. I can only comment from the perspective of being a stepchild, and not a step-parent, but, man. That’s just the world, right there. Thank you for sharing it with us!

  8. Excellent story! And for crying out loud, close the sweat shop, and buy an AC for the house. And one more thing, is the carwash, like going on space mountain at Disney land, or is it like the old Capt. Eeo attraction.

  9. Does this stuff really happen, or are you just making it up? Cause that’s just absolutely precious…dear little heart.

  10. i am sure that conversation went something like the one i just had with my roommate.
    “erin, whats wrong?”
    “nothing, i just read something that kinda got me right here” points in the general chesty area.
    “is everything ok? email from a friend or something?”
    “no” snivle “wil wheaton dot net, and a story he wrote today”
    rolling of eyes “oh my lord.”

  11. I have an 8 year old step son, Wil, and I can relate to a lot of the things you’ve said about your relations with your stepkids. One funny thing though, is that Rush has been a means for Henry and myself to get even closer. He just absolutely loves them, probably as much as I do. I teach him how to play some of their stuff on the guitar. He likes to play the bass line from Tom Sawyer 🙂 We’re going to the Rush concert in San Diego on July 7th. They’re doing a show in LA and Irvine too, in case you’re interested.

  12. Yeah, I love when you write about the boys. The stories you write about them tend to be my favorites.
    I guess it’s because you sound the most excited about the good times you have with them. Book deals and poker are cool things to get excited about too, but it’s a different kind of excitement that I sense when you’re writing about the boys.
    I guess it’s because your relationship with them is far more important than other ‘things’ that get you excited.
    I wrote the word excited a lot.

  15. A modern-day warrior
    Mean mean stride,
    Today’s tom sawyer
    Mean mean pride.
    Though his mind is not for rent,
    Don’t put him down as arrogant.
    His reserve, a quiet defense,
    Riding out the day’s events.
    The river
    And what you say about his company
    Is what you say about society.
    Catch the mist, catch the myth
    Catch the mystery, catch the drift.
    The world is, the world is,
    Love and life are deep,
    Maybe as his eyes are wide.
    Today’s tom sawyer,
    He gets high on you,
    And the space he invades
    He gets by on you.
    No, his mind is not for rent
    To any God or government.
    Always hopeful, yet discontent,
    He knows changes aren’t permanent,
    But change is.
    And what you say about his company
    Is what you say about society.
    Catch the witness, catch the wit,
    Catch the spirit, catch the spit.
    The world is, the world is,
    Love and life are deep,
    Maybe as his skies are wide.
    Exit the warrior,
    Today’s tom sawyer,
    He gets high on you,
    And the energy you trade,
    He gets right on to the friction of the day.

  17. Wil, that was a really great post. There are times when I can’t imagine ever having kids, then I hear a story like that, and I’m not so sure anymore. On the topic of kids and the media, I actually just found a book about that in the library the other day. It was a really interesting read. It had several essays about the ways in which children interact with the media, either as passive “sponges” or as active decision-makers who can choose what the things they watch mean to them.

  19. That’s the sweetest thing.
    And I hate Rush with the burning passion of a thousand fiery red suns. Yay for Anne, Nolan, and Ryan. 😉

  22. Like, I’m a loyal Canadian, eh? So when somebody is dissing Rush, I have to step in. Definitely one of the most awesome power rock bands ever…and they came from a country with 1/10th the population of the US of A.

  24. Hey, look at that, funny /and/ sweet… now I don’t need any more M&Ms for the rest of the night. (good thing too, they ran out 3 hours ago…)
    Great story. Thanks for the distraction.

  25. Hey, look at that, funny /and/ sweet… now I don’t need any more M&Ms for the rest of the night. (good thing too, they ran out 3 hours ago…)
    Great story. Thanks for the distraction.

  26. That’s GREAT to hear about your connection with Ryan. My girlfriend’s daughter Lindsay just turned 13 this past Sunday (THIRTEEN!!!!!!) she was 7 when Connie & I got together, and even though I KNOW that she loves me, she’s 13, and therefore “Too Cool” to admit it. I hope that SOMEDAY she’ll open up to me because that’s one of the things that’s been keeping Connie and I from getting married. I WON’T do it while Lindsay still sees me as some sort of “threat” to her, that I’m trying to take her mom away. I just gotta know man, HOW did you ever get through this in the begining? Thanks for letting me know that it DOES eventually get better though!

  27. After being married to my best friend for 10+ years… at the beginning of this year we found ourselves unexpectedly (long story…) pregnant. Now, at best, we were kid “agnostic” and while we hadn’t said the final no yet – we were pretty far along the path of thinking that we weren’t going to have any kids. Being a mother is not something I ever wished or dreamed for… as they say, I must missed the maternal gene when it was being passed out… or something.
    So now, I’m going on 4 months pregnant – I’m still apprehensive about what this is going to mean for me, my husband & I, and for the mini-human we will be introduced to in September and our lives. I’m daunted. When folks say “Congratulations!!!” – I diminutively reply, “um, thanks” and then silently to myself, “i think…”.
    This is going to be a whole new landscape and unlike anything I’ve ever done. I feel like I just got buckled into a rollercoaster ride that is the world’s most terrifying and the cars are clicking their way up to the top of the first drop. I’m figuring, at this point, the best thing to do is raise my hands up in the air and SCREAM! All the while, my stomach is churning and I’m not sure I’m going to make it to the end of the ride… and yet while reading about your experience(s) with your stepsons… is one of the few places where I find hope and think – God I’m scared — but — I think it’s going to be worth it.
    Thanks Wil.

  28. Okay, I’m just going to get this speck out of my eye…really, I’m not tearing up.
    Aw, frell it – I’m buying Rush: Sprit of Radio on iTunes right now and grinning like an idiot at how sweet this story makes me feel.

  29. I have always thought, or hoped, that parents know basically what they’re doing and don’t have any insecurities about their role as parent. Since I plan on having my own kids in a few years I’m beginning to see that you really can only learn parenting from experience and that it’s going to be a hell of a ride. Your post really got me thinking about it, and I have to thank you for that Wil. It’s nice to know parenting is going to have such touching moments, and that it won’t all be about the cute.
    But the cute will still be appreciated, of course.
    Cheers

  30. Great post. I laughed, I cried; I tried to do both without making any noise (@ 1am), resulting in minor stomach pain…
    And Rush is awesome (I get that from *my* mother)

  31. Okay, after reading that, I had no choice but to switch to my terminal window and execute the commands:
    erbo@cerebro:~$ cd /network/MP3_2/Rush/
    erbo@cerebro:/network/MP3_2/Rush$ mpg123 Limelight.mp3
    Great story, Wil. If I were ever a parent or stepparent (highly unlikely), I would consider myself fortunate to do half as well as you do. (But Rush is awesome, and don’t you ever let Ryan convince you otherwise.)
    [4:22] Decoding of Limelight.mp3 finished.

  34. Hey Wil, that was a great story. While everyone is talking about music, I have a question. I was just listening to “The Moebius” by Orbital. I’m studying, so I wasn’t listening too hard, but there are two voices in the song. One is Michael Dorn doing Worf. I could swear that the other is you. True?
    Also, I still have to comment on your great interview with Bob Rivers. Bob wasn’t so hot, but you were great. Any appearances up in Seattle soon?

  35. Wil,
    Hold those moments close to your heart, because as a parent you know they are few and far between. Kids are awsome, they can make you feel completely stupid and then turn around and make you feel like you rule the world, but that is just a mother speaking. Hold them close while you can, because one day they will fly away.

  36. *grin* see all of us back here sobbing, wil?
    shiver me timbers, boy, ye can write. moreover, that makes people care.
    that can change the world.
    but you knew that.

  37. You know, I’ve never really heard Rush to be able to say whether I think they’re good or not… but I love Comfort Eagle with a passion. So I don’t know about your taste in music, Wil, but I do know that your boys have it going on. 🙂

  39. *sob, sniff*
    That was just too …too cute for words. I know you would like to be manly and all, but I just loved that… you are such a pie! 🙂

  41. hey wil,
    that was such a lovely bit of writing! i was explaining to my friend yesterday why i love your writing so much, and the only way i could describe it is that you put people right there with you. i mean, i was sat in the back of that car, listening to you guys! i love it.
    thanks for sharing wil,
    brought tears to my eyes!
    take care
    rach

  42. Thats so awesome Wil. Ryan and Nolan are so lucky to have you in their life, and i know its really cheesy and corny and all the other veggie-processed foods to say…but its the truth.

  43. limelight is perhaps my favorite rush song. wicked.
    tell them to listen to it a few times. it’ll grow on `em. just like the band yes.

  45. Your two biggest fans are expecting a D&D game very soon. And 50,000 monkeys are looking forward to hearing all about it.
    A few weeks ago I knew nothing about “serious poker” and next-to-nothing about Dungeons & Dragons. One course down, one to go, Professor Wheaton!

  48. See, this is one of thie things that RAWKS (to steal your word O monkied one) about you. You have a succesful book. You’re writing another. You have something goin for you! And yet, what makes you emotional to the point you dedicate a whole entry to it? Nolan and Ryan. 🙂 Wow. You’re a awesome actor and writer but more importantly I what I take from your blog is your also an awesome person which rawks even harder than the other two.
    🙂 Awesome Wil.
    —Jason–

  50. Wow. Now that was a narrative. Kudos to all three of you for the forward progress.
    You’re now officially a part of them. A part of who they are. You’ve given your humor and your sense of writing to your stepson. Rush? Well, kids can’t be perfect, you know? Geddy Lee is an acquired taste to the kids these days.
    I just hope I’m not the only one who sees another book in the works here…
    Subtle hint: “Doug, get off the juice.”

Comments are closed.

Related Posts

Recent Posts