i palindrome i
Last week, I sent what I thought was the completed draft off to my editor. He sent back notes, and asked me, “Why don’t you ever talk about the actual experience of working on Nemesis?”
“Because I never wrote about it on my website,” I said.
“Well, as a reader, I really miss it not being in the book. You lead up to it, then you reflect upon it, but you left out the actual doing it. I think it needs to be there.”
“Okay,” I said, “it’s going to take a couple of days, though. My memory is a little fuzzy on it, and I’ll have to double-check everything.”
“Great. I look forward to reading it.”
When I worked on the movie, I kept some notes; little one line things like, “security,” and “The Mill,” and “Planet Hell.” They would have jarred my memory had I used them within a few days or even weeks of filming . . . but it’s been almost two years, and they just looked like disconnected words to me. So I got out my script, and my call sheets, and talked with Anne, and read my archived weblog entries . . . and most of my memories came back to me. Some of them were just impressions, (good for talking about, but not writing down,) and others were clear enough to be recollected in the book.
There’s a huge difference between telling my friends, “Patrick was cool,” and recreating for a reader exactly what he did that made him so cool, you know? It’s the difference, Cory Doctorow told me, between showing and telling. “Always show if you have a choice,” he said. (And I’m not name-dropping. Cory gave me great advice which made a huge difference to me as a writer, and I want to give him credit for it. So there.)
So, to get to the point of this story: On Wednesday night, I finally finished Just A Geek. On Thursday morning, I got notes from Brett, and on Thursday afternoon, we sent the manuscript off to O’Reilly’s production department.
I can’t believe that it’s done! There’s this conflicted feeling of relief and sadness that I get when I finish working on a movie or doing a run of a play. The feeling never the same for two projects, but it’s the same . . . wait. It’s like this: It’s never the same flavor, but it’s always the same texture. Does that make sense? I think it does, and I’m actually quite happy with that metaphor. 🙂
See, for the last month, I’ve had a pretty set routine: I get up, I make coffee, I read some e-mail and check up on news, then I write for several hours. I go out of hte house for lunch, then come home and write until I’m out of creative steam. I spend the evenings trying to unwind, but I can’t, because I know that the book has to be finished, so I usually find myself back at the computer working on stuff that I know I’m going to end up rewriting in the morning. Futurama, Family Guy, then sleep for about 7 or 8 hours, and the whole thing starts all over again.
Oh, and this great schedule has resulted in me seriously porking out. I’ve been on a steady diet of fast food and beer for about a month, and I think I’ve gained close to ten pounds. I’m a small guy, so that’s a lot. Watch Screen Savers on Wednesday, and marvel at how fat my double chin is. I think they may give it its own show.
When that schedule was over, I found myself really not knowing what to do . . . so I spent most of yesterday on the couch, watching the second season of Futurama. Normally, I don’t waste an entire day like that, but I think I earned it. I think the intensity of the rewriting process (it was more emotional than I had expected, to recall all the ups and downs of the last few years) finally caught up with me, and I needed to let my brain rest. It was like sitting down after being on my feet for most of a day, and realizing just how tired I was.
So now the weekend is here. Anne’s out of town, the kids are with their dad, and I was supposed to be in Michigan for the awesome Penguicon. Of course, the one weekend in the entire freaking year that I want to be out of town, I get a call that I may be working on a movie, so I had to stay home . . . and I’m not working on the movie. This is why I don’t talk about potential projects any more. It’s a little embarrassing when they don’t pan out. Furstrating as all hell for me, and people who were looking forward to meeting me, too.
Luckily I have found some things to do to keep me occupied this weekend: I went to a They Might Be Giants show with my brother last night (that was awesome and worthy of its own post. I’ll get to that RSN), and I’m going to an art show today. Tomorrow, I’m helping my friend Darin paint at his house, so his baby has a nice room to sleep in when she arrives in a couple of weeks.
That’s it. My coffee is done, and I’m all out of things to talk about for today.
Oh, except for it’s raining right now, and it feels like the rain in Hawai’i, but colder. I’ve written this entire entry with the doors and windows open, so I can hear and smell the rain, and Ferris just shook herself off all over my bathrobe. Yuck. Now I smell like a wet dog.
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Enjoy the down time! You deserve it! So happy the book is done! We can’t wait!
Glad to hear it’s all done. Enjoy your relaxation, because it isn’t going to last too long once the book is out and you have to start touring. Speaking of touring, do you ever come to Canada??
hey wil… congrats on finishing your book… you definetly deserve to relax after all of your hard work…. cant wait to get JAG and I’m ordering Dancing Barefoot on Amazon… can’t wait to read it…
Speaking of Dancing Barefoot, I found it in a mall bookstore in the science fiction section between the D&D section and Harry Turtledove’s Out of Darkness, which FINALLY ends that series. Judas Priest, that was a long series. Any who, congratulations on the book. It was an excellent read. I’m relatively new to the site and that book gave me a better understanding of your background and more respect for this site. All right, enough sounding like a groupie, must…continue…studying… alkynes..
Does this mean you’ll finally be getting back to the people who have been writing to you?
I’m so proud of you! Dredging up memories like you’ve been doing is an exhausting process, and often times leads to the resurfacing of emotions that you had thought were long worked through (or long buried) and that can really take it’s toll, so I just wanted to say Thank You and give you a really big hug for doing that for us. Now go curl up with a blanket and your animals and REST! 🙂
I know what you mean with the metaphor of relief/sadness/texture from finishing your project. I was a die-hard theater person for years back in college and every time a show ended I would feel a little lighter and a little heavier at the same time. It was kind of a “Wow, kind of glad that’s over now I don’t have to stress about it so much” mixed with a “Well now what am I supposed to do?” I could go into it more, but it’s Your site not Mine 🙂
Anyways, maybe having a surprise break this weekend is for the best! Relax, kick back, sit and watch the grass grow (or the rain fall–always soothing) and let your brain and your soul have some quiet time. You more than earned it.
Going to stop writing now before I repeat myself even more. Congratulations on the book, Thank You for writing it, and Rock On!
Congrats on finishing! You deserve to veg out for a while. And…I did read on Neil Gaiman’s blog that he was dissapointed you couldn’t make it to Penguicon – he was looking forward to meeting you! 🙂
Yay Wil, congrats on finally finishing your book. I, and many others look forward to reading it. Futurama, man I love that show, and Matt Groening is a guest star on the Simpsons this Sunday. I can’t wait. Hey, you may actually get to watch it tomorrow night…
OMG, screen savers as in tech tv The Screen Savers, with Patrick Norton, he is so cute. Sorry Wil went fangirl there for a minute. I meant to say way to go on finishing the book, look forward to reading it.
Wil…I want you to know that we feel your pain…sorry….my hand slipped….writing is such a hard bitch….it is seldom easy…ok…writing things on the walls of a toilet stall are usually pretty easy…and fun….but I mean the kind of writing that goes on paper that you let educated people see.
Don’t worry about telling us if a film,tv,writing,monkey-wrestling gig etc. doesn’t pan out…remember…we are laughing WITH you….no….really….you got one really jolly site around here these parts Mr. Fella(sorry…I sometimes channel Mongo,a Trobriand Islander who only spoke Pigin English)….take care,Sir…love the robe….magenta is YOUR color….
Major congrats on finishing JAG. w00t!
Since the O’Reilly people are going to make it available in bookstores, what are the chances it’ll be available in Canadian bookstores as well? Or am I gonna have to road trip down to Seattle to get one?
As for rain, Hawaii rain feels warm. At least to someone who lives in the Pacific temperate rainforest, and knows a heck of a lot about getting rained on. 🙂
So, what’s next on the agenda?
Kidding! I know you’ve been working your ass off and you deserve a break.
I’ll be checking out Deep Core tonight and see what all the fuss is about. I read in the previous comments that you gave a disclaimer about this movie. What did you say? I really want to know. Anyone out there know?
I was so totally at the TMBG concert last night, too. House of Blues, Downtown Disney?
Had I but known, I could of fan-girled and been awkward and shy around you as I tried to impress upon you how awesome I thought you were.
TMBG, and opening act that didn’t blow AND Wil Wheaton? Dude, that was a totally fantastic night I had last night — and I didn’t even know it!
Laura: yep. Anaheim. Wasn’t the show AMAZING? Corn-Mo ruled . . . and when I bought his T-shirt, he said, “Hey! Aren’t you Wil Wheaton? I love your blog, man!”
How cool was that?
Damn you Wil Wheaton…I just heard the audioblog about Anne’s grandparents and how noone has visited them except y’all in years. You were sooooo nice to listen to their little stories about cats,dogs and all the small happenings in the past.
Now I have to be considerate of you and have heaps of respect for you as a person….grrrr…I’ll get even with you,Sunny Jim…see if I don’t….
ok, you have to know how much i have been wil wheaton obsessing this weekend. not in a scary stalker way or anything of course. i rented stand by me, neverland and book of days and my dancing barefoot book just arrived this morning. (thanks amazon) so imagine my shock when i read that you were at the VERY SAME tmbg concert i was at last night. one of the best EVER i might add! i am a new fan of the corn mo. so yah, you were there and i missed it. why weren’t you in VIP which is where i was! ahk. anyway, very cool. /end fangirl rant
Hey,
Cngratulations on finishing. I’m really proud of you for getting through it all, and I’m sure that when I actually get the book, I’m going to be wowed beyond belief. I can’t wait to pull it off the shelf at Vromans.
Enjoy your weekend of rest. As just about everyone else has sait, you deserve it.
Scott
PS it’s still raining in Pasadena while I write this. There’s this cool deja-vu-ish feeling when something like this reminds me that you’re in the same city as me. I love the way the internet makes and breaks its illusion.
congratulations, wil! i can’t wait to get my hands on this later this year. you really deserve not only a little simpsonian downtime, but you also deserve whatever project you line up next for yourself… never forget, you’ve only got one life — take a break, and find something else wonderful to keep you soaring high!
and on behalf of the posse, we’d also like to extend thoughtful appreciation to anne, nolan, and ryan, for creating such a wonderful atmosphere in which you live and write — i’m guessing you couldn’t have done this in such a useful, productive manner if you didn’t have these lovely, loving rocks to comfort you when and if you fell… (i just got out of “film school” and, fortunately or unfortunately, i think i’ve decided that screenwriting is in my future… so i know all about struggling with writing!). congratulations again! oh, and got anymore poker stories or D&D w/ the kids?
I’m at Penguicon now actually and was disappointed when I found out yesterday that you weren’t able to make it. It would have been nice to meet you, but I totally understand what you had to miss the con. Sorry that the movie gig didn’t pan out for you.
Neil Gaiman is here and is a really cool guy to talk to, and did a very good reading which if you’re a fan of his work I bet you would have enjoyed it.
Oh well hopefully some other time I get to meet you at a con, just to tell you in person that I really enjoy your Blog/website.
Blake
Oh and a quick follow-up… John “maddog” Hall did a nice talk linking Star Trek and the open source movement. During the talk he mentioned the previous panel he was on… it was “Death to Wesley Crusher”… you’d probably be happy to know that he actually defended Wesley and said that he didn’t deserve to die. I’m sure you hear the death to Wesley thing all the time.
Just figured that a *nix geek/god like him defending Wesley might be something that you’d be interested in. =)
Blake
Wil was vey nice as Gordy in “Stand By Me”….I think he was in some sci/fi things too…I don’t follow sci/fi(called “I don’t give a rat’s ass about sci/fi”)…I look forward to reading his written work…His interpretation of Proust’s ‘La Recherche Des Temps Perdue’ holds a glistening promise of cutting-edge perception and a post-modern sensitivity/angst….
So glad to see you back on the weblog! I missed your posts. Don’t worry about the extra 10 lbs, summers on the way and you’ll end up working it off!
Hey dude, so glad you got the book done… I really know that feeling you were describing. Satisfied, but after so much work it is weird to not do anything.
I dunno if I am allowed to say that since we’re not connected in any way but I am really proud of you. Getting two books written is a major achievement, and you must be thrilled to know that most of us have ants in their pants waiting for JAG to hit the bookstores.
And I love your describing the rain… totally vivid.
You’re a total inspiration for any aspiring writer.
Keep it up and all the best.
How is Kris, by the way?
And now that you are bored dude: SET UP THE DARN PAYPAL THING BEFORE I COME OVER AND POOP ON YOUR DOORMAT!!!!!!!!! 😉
what’s that title mean?
You were at the TMBG show at the Anaheim HOB? Damn, I didn’t see you there. Awesome show, and Corn Mo’ is my new favorite Wacky Singer.
so uhh where’s the palindromes?
i love the rain, too, it’s excellent for writing and anything creative really…
do you listen to any music when you write Wil?
Congrats on getting the book off. How just sit back and ponder the load of praise that will be dumped all over you.
Actually, from what you said, maybe sitting isn’t the right thing to do. 🙂 10 lbs = 36,000 kcal you need to burn off, and 1 mile of walking = 100 kcal. So get out there and make traiing for the marathon your goal (and maybe forget about have more than a weekly beer for awhile). My guess is that inspiration for your next project will hit you as you’re walking.
I’m facing a marathon (running) six weeks from now, and I’m putting in about 11 miles (17 or 18km) a day, but it’s never easy getting out the door when you’re tired. Good luck, you can do it.
I went to high school with the brother of a guy who is in They Might Be Giants. I can’t remember either of their names though. Just thought you wouldn’t ever have any use for that info, so I had to pass it on to you.
-Dan
Is Hawaii really spelled Hawai’i? If not, no big deal. If so, you just blew my mind.
Congrats on the book finishing. I’m sure it’ll be great. And I hope it sells a bizzillion copies (be sure to demand a pressing of a bizzillion copies, otherwise they won’t make that many).
I didn’t really like Corn Mo’ last night. Some of my friends really did, I just wasn’t that amused I guess. TMBG were fabulous and the new stuff sounds really good.
Congrats. Relax. Vegging is good.
I think I’m going to throw back a few hard lemonades tonight. I claimed in “Parenting” I was going to do that last night. Of course that whole, you know, parenting thing was happening. 😉 So. Enjoy the empty house! Have more beer. Order a pizza. Hmm, I think I’ll do that too.
I will most likely be taking a glance at Deep Core tonight since hell, scifi has been advertising it forever. Should I do it before or after the lemonades? 😉
Oooh right.. who’s blog is this. Out.
well good goddamn.
I haven’t even had one yet.
Vegging is good. After finishing my last business accounting exam ever, now some time ago and then having to catch up with all the other work that was neglected, I finally managed to catch up with it (actually, I am ahead of schedule, yay!), I have just blown that being-ahead-of-schedule-dom and relished in spending a week doing nothing but playing “Neverwinter Nights” until my brain felt fried (and some eating and sleeping, admittedly). For me, it is something that really helps my brain unwind – and it tells me when I am done with unwinding and ready to face taxing things again, so I never get lost in veggiedom for long. But, yay for vegging. Enjoy the rest, sounds like you earned it!
hey wil,
i’m glad you finally get a weekend off! as everyone else has said, you deserve it!
I thought that metaphor was great! tee hee…made everything seem much clearer! 🙂
anyway,
have a great weekend,
take care
rach
Penguicon Webmaster here….. Just so you know, when Steve Jackson heard that you were hoping to come to Penguicon 3.0, he said “If Wil comes, then I’ll come too.”
….and BTW, he brought the Chaos Game. He says Penguicon 2.0’s Chaos Game setup has left every previous setup in the dust. We’re taking pictures, and they’ll be posted on the website.
Wil,
Downtime at the end of a project is good. You need it. Take it. Wallow in it. Enjoy it. And yeh, in due time you’ll have to think about de-porking, but not this weekend.
Good on you!
Spacewriter
Whoo! Congrats!
At the con; listened to Cmdr Taco for over an hour and a half. His wife is neat.
Hope you can come next year!
Wil,
Way to go…I am happy for you. I look forward to your book. I finally got Dancing Barefoot. It is the best book that i have read all year! all I have to say is….”Shatner Is A Dick!”. I love the Original Star Trek, and I love Kirk, and to know that he is not so cool is depressing. I have always wanted to work with him, but he seems to be a jackass. I am sorry he was terrible to you. Anyway…Way to go, way to go, way to go. I don’t think that there is anything I can tell you, that you don’t all ready know. Have fun this weekend…to bad you don’t live in Wisconsin, we could play some D&D.
P.S. I will be watching Deep Core tonight…I love that movie….
you know when you were posting about the NEMISIS movie here i never really thought about the fact that you hadn’t really elaborated on the day by day production of it…now that you mention it…hey that would be interesting stuff to read…congratulations on finally finishing the book…and futurama is a good way to unwind…cause damn it…you deserve it!
i really do know how to spell NEMESIS.
Congratulations on finishing! I’m so looking forward to it. Sleep is good. Oh, and hi, Ferris! It’s been too long!
Congratulations, Wil. I can’t wait to give it a read!
Congrats! Revision is the hardest part. Writing something the first time is an awesome experience…but it’s the going back over and killing your babies that hurts the most. Good luck with it.
Well, I can’t really say anything that hasn’t been said already so relax, enjoy yourself and thank God for the rain. I guess I’m becoming addicted to your blog like the ‘regulars’ here, I was really jonesing the other day! Welcome back!
Wil,will(?) i be proud of myself as a a man and as an American if i read ‘Dancing Barefoot’?….These are troubled times we live in and i felt i had to ask….
Wil,
Congratulations on finishing JAG. The comments about Nemesis–is that part of JAG or a separate post? I’m a little confused. Sorry, I gotta go.
Deep Core starts in ten minutes; don’t want to miss it.
Later, Dude.
Your friend, Freeman 🙂
Nice work finishing JAG. I live in the LA area and I was spening the day inside listening to TMBG when I decided to check your site to see if your off blogging probation…I’m glad you seem to be.
…thats be you, be what your like, be like yourself…
Deep disappointment at your not being able to attend Penguicon!! Spluttering outrage, actually! Hope to see you next year—and I am definitely looking forward to JAG.
Oh, and that PAYPAL thing? If ya wants my bucks, get cracking on that link….the cancer society gets money from me anyway, but I want to support what you are doing.
Tell Darin (which is my husband’s name, btw, same spelling) – that I said babies should sleep in their parent’s rooms for quite some time after birth. Think about it, the baby has been ~in~ it’s mommy for 9 months, the last thing it can even imagine is being alone! If possible co-sleeping or in an arms-reach type sidecar is the best arrangement. That way when the baby stirs to nurse the mom doesn’t have to get out of bed. In fact the mom and baby barely wake up – much better than having a baby have to come fully awake for the parents to hear it across the room or down the hall or even through the monitor and then take forever to get back to sleep. And yes, I’m assuming nursing, not formula, because we’re mammals meant to nurse. Formula is the FOURTH choice by the World Health Organization. Even our relatively conservative American Association of Pediatrics says nurse exclusively for 6 months and then continue for at least a year.
Thanks for passing that on. And thank you for lettimg me use your site to talk about babies and breastfeeding – it’s a huge concern on mine.
Oh, when Anne gets back tell her that I gave platelets again since I commented on one of her posts about it. It’s a shame her veins weren’t cooperative but that happens. Her post helped me remember how important it is so I’m trying to donate as often as I can.
Hmmmm, I lived my applications development career being project oriented. I loved the focused feeling of being able to work something to perfection and then wrap ribbons around the package and walk away with a very satisfied feeling of a job well done, independent of other’s criticisms.
The payback for feeling that good is the post-goal depression afterwards. Without that centering focus, there is a void that you grieve over.
Both my son and daughter have talked to me about these same feelings, but I have really not found much in the literature of adult psychology about it. The only relief we have found is — the next passionate project.