Anne and I took Felix to his vet on Monday for a blood panel. We hoped the results would let us know what our next step was.
Of course, the blood work came back yesterday that his red cell count is extremely low (17 or 19 or something like that) and his kidney values are very high. But his vet said that he’s not suffering unless he’s vomiting or some other stuff that I’ll spare you all. She told us that our options were to put Felix to sleep, or give him Epogen injections three times a week, sub-q fluids twice a day, liquid vitamins and an aluminum hydroxyde suspension each morning, and hope that all that helps him feel better.
It sounds like an awful lot, doesn’t it? Anne and I talked about it, and tried to figure out what was best. We are absolutely dedicated to doing what is best for Felix, and we’re not going to prolong his life simply because we don’t want to say goodbye . . . but if we can help him feel better, and have good quality of life then we want to do whatever we can afford to do. We asked his vet how she thought he’d respond to all this stuff, and she told us that she didn’t know. Apparently, it varies an awful lot from kitty to kitty. She told us what I’ve heard from hundreds of WWdN readers: “Your cat will let you know if he’s ready to go, or if he wants to stick around and try to feel better.”
The thing is, I’ve really felt like Felix has been telling us that he doesn’t feel well, and he’s really over it. He doesn’t want to be cuddled or scratched, or loved, and when I come near him he complains at me and slowly walks away.
Our choice should be pretty clear, right?
I wish it was.
We spent most of yesterday agonizing about it, and we eventually decided to let Felix tell us what we should do. The only question was . . . how?
About two weeks ago, Sketch had a couple of days where he seemed to really go downhill. His breathing was up to almost 50, and he had that freaked out look in his eyes that he had the weekend that we found out he had CHF. I made several frantic phone calls to his vet and his kitty cardiologist, and they advised me to give him extra medication to clear his lungs. After several hours, he was down to the low 40s, but was clearly still struggling. I worried that the medicine just wasn’t enough, and I hated seeing him in so much discomfort, so I sat down next to him on the floor in my bedroom and said, “I know that you’re feeling pretty lousy right now, and if you’re tired of medications and trips to the vet and feeling this way, I understand. I love you, and you’ve brought a lot to my life, but if you’re really suffering, I don’t want to force you to stay alive. But if you want to fight, we can help you feel better, and your doctors have told me what to do.” I scratched his little head and told him that he could let me know what he wanted me to do.
Okay, I realize how insane this sounds. Normally, I’m a pretty cold and rational person, and I would scoff at the idea of talking to my cat like he’s a person. I know, I know. It’s lame, right? But I don’t think it’s much different than praying, or asking the universe for help, or keeping someone in your thoughts, or anything like that. It’s just . . . it’s just putting a little bit of hope (or faith, or whatever) into Something Else. I’d never let it take the place of things like medication, trips to the doctor, or good solid science . . . but we humans have all these constructs in our minds, and sometimes we do some pretty silly things to stay comfortable. At times like this, I don’t care if I’m anthropomorphizing my pets. If I can assign some human qualities to their body language or behavior and feel a little closer to them, so be it.
I finished talking to Sketch, kissed the top of his head, and left him alone. I hoped the medicines would work, and I hoped that he’d “tell” me that he was feeling better. I walked out to the kitchen, called his vet, and had The Talk with her. She told me what my options were, and when I hung up the phone I just sat in there and stared at a blank AbiWord document for what seemed like hours.
It was actually closer to thirty minutes or so when I walked out into my living room, and saw Sketch. He was sitting up, eyes bright, in the middle of the floor.
“How you feeling, fatty?” I said.
He meowed at me. It was bright and clear. No gurgling. I crouched down, and he walked over to me, purring loudly. He rubbed his face against my hands, and walked little circles around me for a minute or so. Finally, he lay down on his side next to me and closed his eyes. He continued to purr.
I pet him for a bit, and he fell asleep. I counted his breaths: he was in the low 30s and he seemed to be doing fine. Clearly, the medication was working. Why it chose that particular moment to work rather than hours earlier when the vet said it should have is beyond me, and I’m sure it’s just a coincidence that I’d just had “The Talk” with my cat . . . and now I’m starting to realize how stupid I sound so I’ll just stop this right now. The bottom line is: whether it’s a coincidence or not, I asked Sketch to let me know what he wanted me to do, and I felt like he was telling me that he had some fight left in him. He continues to improve, and he’s been sleeping on my chest or on his back between me and Anne every night since then.
In fact, when I got home from What’s My Line tonight, Sketch hopped off my bed, walked with me into my office, and is currently on his back at my feet. I can hear him purring over the soft hum of my CPU’s fan.
Again, I’m really struggling with the . . . uh . . . metaphysical(?) aspect of this whole thing, but to get back to my point:
I walked out onto my patio this afternoon, and found Felix sleeping in this blanket I got from Think Geek that we call “The Geek Blanket.” It’s all fleecy and soft and snuggly, and all my animals love to sleep in it. (We put it on the patio near the spot Felix’s been spending most of his time, and stuck one of his catnip mice in it, because we thought it would help him feel more comfortable.) I was on the phone with my manager, telling him how Felix was doing.
“So we’re going to see what Felix wants us to do,” I said. “I know it sounds stupid, but I’m going to talk with him, and take the advice of our vet: Felix will tell us what he wants us to do.”
While I was talking about him, Felix looked up at me, walked over to where I was on the patio, and did the same thing Sketch did: the walk, the meowing, the nuzzling, the whole thing. I hung up the phone, and had “The Talk” with him. Yes, I know how stupid this sounds, and believe me it sounds insane to me to write it down . . . but it’s what I did. While I talked to him, he was more affectionate and vocal than he’d been in days.
I hung up the phone and called the vet. I told her that we’d try the vitamins and shots. When I hung up with her, Anne called.
“I thought about it, and I want to at least try to help Felix for a week. If he’s not feeling better, and if he’s got no quality of life, we’ll say goodbye to him and put him to sleep . . . but I couldn’t live with myself if we just gave up on him.”
I told her about him walking around me, just like Sketch. I told her how stupid it feels to talk about this like I had some kind of mystical conversation with my cats, but the bottom line is that we both really know what’s going on, and we know the odds are against us. But Felix’s vet says that he’s not in pain, and there’s a chance that he may respond positively to this treatment. It’s not too expensive, and we’ll see what happens in the next three to five days.
I’m exhausted, and I don’t know if this makes much sense. I started writing it before I left for ACME tonight, and I just don’t have the energy to edit or rewrite it. But people are e-mailing about Felix and Sketch, and I figure that if I’m going to share my concerns, at least I should share their progress.
Thanks for your comments and e-mails, and for keeping us in your thoughts.
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hey Wil,
Glad to hear that Sketch is doing better… and I agree with Anne’s decision regarding giving Felix another week to see if his quality of life improves. Still sending mucho mojo, positive karmic energy and white light to the kitties and their humans.
Take care,
Terry
p.s. Happy St. Patrick’s Day to you, Anne, Ryan, Nolan and all of the non-humans at the Wheaton household!
T 🙂
Wil, matters of faith or metaphysical stuff often don’t make logical sense…don’t worry about explaining yourself. I wish you and Anne the very best with Sketch’s treatment.
Wil, the cats both respond to the concern and intonation of your voice and they observe body language instinctively as we all wish we could do. Bottom line, they WILL tell you how they feel and what they want to do, you just have to allow them to be abstract about it. Cats are not humans, but they certainly bring out the best in us 🙂
So here I am, at stupid o’clock in the morning reading about your cat bawling my eyes out. I feel for you I guess. I remember when my cat, Bullwinkle, decided that it was time to go, and died in my lap. One minute he was there, then… Just gone. I miss him so very much even though he peed on everything. I suppose that was part of his charm, the smell of his fur, the feel of his purr in my chest, and so on. I’m so sorry that you are in the position of having to make such a dreadful choice. I wish you all the best in this dark and worrysome time.
I know Felix and Sketch aren’t human members of your family, but they are still your family and they can tell you things. All cats do after a while, it’s how they rule the roost 😀
My Paddy can say hello (he’s heard us say it to him so often the “mow-ow”s at us when we meet), tell us he’s hungry, tell us the kitchen door’s open and can we come and close it please and tell us when he wants a cuddle. He can tell my Dad that he knows he needs to take this horrible tablet and can he get on with it please and I’m sure when his time eventually comes he’ll let us know that he’s had enough of the tablets, injections, blood sampling and endless trips to the vet and he’d just like to go to sleep please. Right now he’s letting us know he’s a happy cat with a warm bed and those vets trips mean more food, so that’s ok with him.
Felix will let you know Wil, just the same as Sketch. Thinking of all of you right now and sending Felix all the mojo in the world.
I know Felix and Sketch aren’t human members of your family, but they are still your family and they can tell you things. All cats do after a while, it’s how they rule the roost 😀
My Paddy can say hello (he’s heard us say it to him so often the “mow-ow”s at us when we meet), tell us he’s hungry, tell us the kitchen door’s open and can we come and close it please and tell us when he wants a cuddle. He can tell my Dad that he knows he needs to take this horrible tablet and can he get on with it please and I’m sure when his time eventually comes he’ll let us know that he’s had enough of the tablets, injections, blood sampling and endless trips to the vet and he’d just like to go to sleep please. Right now he’s letting us know he’s a happy cat with a warm bed and those vets trips mean more food, so that’s ok with him.
Felix will let you know Wil, just the same as Sketch. Thinking of all of you right now and sending Felix all the mojo in the world.
Wil,
I am still keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. Its so hard to know what is best for our four-legged family members. Just do the best you can and do what’s in your heart. Currently my mom is sick and in the hospital, so my talks with the Great Unknown are frequent. I hope everything works out for the best. Hang in there…
Sandra
Wil-
The kitty’s understand us much more than we understand them. It isn’t as crazy as you think. Plus, those of the feline persuasion have a built in gene for listening.
Ask the kitty’s what’s up. They’ll tell you. Just make no bones in what you say, and make it clear. Sometimes it’s as simple as explaining the situation to them and then asking “So do you want ____?” …waiting for response of some sort… then, “or do you want ____?” If it’s important, I’ve never had a meower fail me in answering somehow, some way.
I’ll keep Felix in the purr-box of my mind. He wants to fight, he’ll get better.
-Eric
Oh, Wil, you are not lame or stupid. There are different kinds of pet people, the ones who have animals (who are hardly ever allowed in the house) and the ones who have furry family members. We have four “fuzzy children” (otherwise known as cats) with distinct personalities, traits, and ways of interacting with us and each other. We have had all 4 of them for many years (ages 4,10,11, and 15) and before them there were others that we had to say goodbye to, including a couple of dogs when our kids were still at home. So the whole Hooper clan (Jamie, Mary, Coolit, Nikon, Zebra and Pooka) are sending the Wheaton clan LOTS of Kitty Mojo.This stuff really works!
ps Have you ever had a conversation with your cat? Sometimes, we just give in and meow back when they talk to us. We seem to have great communication – if only we knew what we were saying!
🙂
Wil,
If there is one thing that I am sure of, it’s that our household companions (of the non-human sort) can understand us.. at least our feelings. There is nothing lame about them telling you what they want, or you talking to them. Just like any other loved one, they tell us what they want and need with their body language. Whatever happens, if you act out of love, you will do what is right, for him and you.
As an aside, the one nice thing about kidney failure/disease is that you can be pretty sick and not really be in pain.. just a bit uncomfortable. I’ve been living with it for years now, and my biggest complaint isn’t pain, it’s feeling tired, and swollen and just ::blah::
As always, I will keep Sketch, Felix, and the rest of the Wheaton household in my prayers.
May you have a blessed St Patrick’s Day..
Ocean McIntyre Ni an t’Saoir
— Gho caed mile failte! —
Wil, you’re not insane, or stupid, or whatever you think you might sound like, at all. Pets become part of the family, I think people who don’t feel the way you feel right now are the strange ones. I always talk to my cat, and I’m convinced he understands and answers in his own way.
I’ll keep you and your family, the human and the non-human members, in my thoughts.
Wil… you don’t have to feel weird about the way you talk to your animals. I do think that if we are willing to be open to it, we can connect to animals… why should that not be possible? We may not be able to explain how it works, but didnt we used to be closer to nature, before the whole thing calling itself civilisation screwed things up? You do have a special connection to the universe, you have proven that often enough. Animals do. Children do. Only adults begin to lose it if they don’t watch it. I used to talk to my budgie, and I was always sure he understood what I said, even
Wil, I’ve been reading along @ the livejournal feed, and just wanted to say: Don’t feel stupid for talking to your pets!
Language is more than the sounds coming from our mouths; it involves body language and other intangibles we take for granted. Animals don’t take those things for granted, and respond to them. Think of evey time you’ve felt down and they all pile on you, snuggling close, purring and licking. Different species? Yes, but same tribe as far as heart is concerned. We all feel, we all think, and we all want to understand. Felix, and before him, Sketch, just want you to understand that they “hear” you, and will respond accordingly. Meaning, they can’t say, “Dude! Help me out, will ya?”, but they can make sure you see the hope and love in their eyes.
No wonder we love our pets – they communicate just like babies!
Continued *hugs* and *mojo* for your entire family, 4-leggers included, natch! 😉
-Michele
I don’t think it’s stupid at all. You do what you have to do to take care of your family, even if it doesn’t make sense sometimes. Your kitties will have happy lives and comfortable ends, which is the best thing you could ever do for them, IMO. How you get there doesn’t matter. Best wishes in hard times. –j.
I posted here a while back about having to think about putting my Haylee dog to sleep… I wont go on and on and on about it, but if you’re bored and cant sleep or something (and this goes for all the readers/posters here) you can read about how I dealt with/handled it. it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do and a month or so later I still hurt. I dunno, hand in there.
http://www.livejournal.com/users/zilpha/2005/02/23/
I posted here a while back about having to think about putting my Haylee dog to sleep… I wont go on and on and on about it, but if you’re bored and cant sleep or something (and this goes for all the readers/posters here) you can read about how I dealt with/handled it. it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do and a month or so later I still hurt. I dunno, hang in there.
http://www.livejournal.com/users/zilpha/2005/02/23/
You’re not insane. I talk to my dogs like that all the time. Well, I would if I was back home in Long Beach. Hope they and you feel better.
PS: Your book is fantastic. Straight up fantastic.
You don’t sound lame at all, Wil. I do think pets let us know when they’ve had enough.
I had to put my childhood companion to sleep when she had CHF. I was 23, she was 13. We’d had her since she was 8 weeks old, and she was my sweet puppy. She was just listless, almost totally non-responsive, and seemed to be saying she’d had enough.
I cried all the way to the vet’s office, and when I got there I couldn’t speak. She had been there recently enough that the receptionist recignized her (but not me, since my parents had been taking her in because I traveled all week). I was so glad I didn’t have to explain what I needed.
She was ready, and she let us know that. I think both of your kitties will let you know when they’re ready, and I think they are letting you know that they’re not ready yet.
Good thoughts for all of you headed in your direction.
My cat Sebastian was showing signs of diabetes for months before I knew what the problem was. Now that I’ve been giving him insulin injections twice/day for over a year, and it’s become easier than brushing my teeth. He also has some anger issues where he gets so worked up and lashes out at anything near him, so I’ve had talks with him about calming down. I’d tell him he needs to figure out what he’s really mad about and address it in nonviolent ways instead of displacing his anger, but I think that’s going a little too beyond his comprehension level. I can hear him now, “Tiffany, I’m really angry that you put your foot in the way of the open door so that I couldn’t run outside.”
P.S. My mom talked to her philodendron (we’d had it for 20 years) before she threw it out because it was so sickly.
Dude – Never feel bad/silly/stupid/etc. for being affectionate to a loved one… even if that loved one happens to walk on four legs. Sending plenty of Chicago mojo Felix’s way, keep your spirits up.
–T
My aunt’s cat was like her baby.. she had Willie since she was very young, and when he got sick, they didn’t feel like they could put him down; it was too hard.
Willie ran away to die on his own.
That makes me very sad to think that he spent it alone, with no one there to hold him.
It was about 10 years ago, and my aunt is still heartbroken over it.
My grandmother kept my cat when I moved where I couldn’t have pets, and a couple years ago she called me to tell me that Otis died…. I didn’t even know he was sick!
She told me that he had been sick for awhile, and that he was in pain but she couldn’t put him down, as she would feel badly. He spent a weekend in the snow in pain, and finally dies Sunday night. The ground was frozen and so she had to keep him in an old plastic container til the ground thawed so she could bury him.
*cries*
My Otis was dead and I wish I had been there to take him to the vet to put him down.
I know you guys will do the right thing, if it comes down to it. You may feel guilt for awhile, but imagine the guilt if Felix suffers…
I am keeping all of you in my thoughts, and sending out all the mojo I can muster!
*hugs you all*
Hello Wil,
May I recommend a book for you? Conversations With Animals by Lydia Hiby. I know it made me feel better about talking to my furbabies, snakes and turtles included.
Heather
I’m so glad to hear how well Sketch is doing! It seems like everything you went through with Sketch kind of put you in a better place to make decisions about what to do with Felix, if that makes sense. It’s just so hard to know what to do for our pets when they can’t tell us what they WANT. I think you and Anne are totally doing the right thing for Felix, and like you said, you’ll know when you know…
Keeping you and your kitties in my thoughts!
I agree with all the above. C’mon Wil – you know better than to worry about what others think! You do what works for you and piss on any closed minded individual that wasn’t held as a child that thinks there’s something wrong with it!
Animals have different perception that us mere humans. They sense fear, when you’re feeling down…etc What we call ESP (for humans) is a natural sense for animals. It’s only logical to communicate with them the only way we know how. They understand.
Hoping for the best from the East Coast,
Sharfa
One of our oldest cats got sick last summer. He had been sick for a couple years with kidney problems, special diets, etc. But now he was really sick.
We did the fluids for a week, and it didn’t work very well. He continued to lose weight at a rapid rate. He took the treatment extremely well. It didn’t seem to hurt him at all…I think he could tell we were trying to help.
Finally, my wife had a talk with him, and she told him that we loved him, but if it was time for him to go, it was ok. The very next day, he was waiting in the carrier to go.
I don’t doubt for a second that he knew it was time, and he was telling us it was ok. We still cried for a week.
All my best to you and your family, especially Felix and Sketch.
Hi Wil,
The feelings that you’ve expressed & things you’ve been doing with Felix are not silly or crazy. You’ve made me think of my own dog, who is now 10 years old. Although she’s in good health now, I expect over the course of the next five years for that to change.
I’ve even started having converstaions with myself (and the dog) about some of the feelings that you are going through right now.
I hope my senses don’t fail when when it’s time to let go. Like you, I pray to God that I have the strength to make the right decision.
I joke with my dog sometimes about her just *once* being able to speak instead her driving me bonkers with that silly look when she wants something and I just can’t figure out what. But, if she is ever to *speak* to me, as much as it might sound awful to say, I hope she is able to somehow let me know when it’s her time to go. For as much unselfish love as my dog has given to me over the years, it would break my spirit and heart if for just one second she was miserable.
Felix will be in my thoughts & paryers…
Wil….
I’ve had dogs and cats all my life, and I have talked to each one of them, just as if they were my human companions. I truly believe they understand us through the tone of our voices. If there’s ever any doubt whether a cat knows what you’re saying to them, all I have to do is ask my Persian, Jean-Luc, if he wants treats. He immediately runs to his bed…a box of yarn covered by his own afghan and a towel…turns around and meows until I start serving them up. A few weeks ago, I had to take him to the groomer. I had a l-o-n-g talk with him on the 20-mile drive, telling him not to scratch or bite Laura. Three hours later, when she called to let me know he was ready to be picked up, she asked me what I did to him. She thought I had tranquilized him, because she said he never took a single swipe at her while she was working with him. It works!
Lots of human prayers and kitty mojo for Felix from Jean-Luc and me, as well as good thoughts, comfort and peace for you, and especially Anne. Ultimately, your little bear will be alright.
Wendy
Wil, it doesn’t sound stupid at all.
Dear Wil.
My best to you and your family. It’s not crazy to talk to your animals, especially in such essential matters. We can have a very deep bond with them.
A few months ago I had to have that conversation with my lapso apso, who was going on 16 yrs. We had had him since he was 8 wks old. He had developed a quick-growing tumor in his lungs that was slowing strangling him. I held him in my arms and talked quietly. I literally asked him, as you did with your cats, what I should do. As I held him quietly, the answer came to me. He was tired of the struggle and he no longer felt good. With lots of tears, we took him to the vet for the last time.
While I hated having to go through the loss, this conversation has helped me know that we made the right decision.
Lots of good wishes I send to your kitty.
Thanks for being so open about your life. I was having one of those “no faith in humanity” kind of days, and you reminded me that there is hope in just about any situation. Thanks!
There is nothing metaphysical about a bond with a loved-one–regardless of how many feet they might have. You communicate with your animals every day–and they communicate with you in return.
Not in words, no. But you know when Ferris is hungry or wants to go out or play. You know when Sketch or Felix is annoyed or wants company or food. They communicate in the only way they know how and you do the same. There’s no shame in that. There’s no shame in talking to an animal, in asking them to communicate in return. You do the best you can.
We’re at our best when we care enough to try.
Wil, your pets do communicate with you. There’s nothing weird or metaphysical about it. They are conscious, knowing beings of love, and they will always try to communicate with you when possible. This is usually body language and little sounds, but you are right when you think they’re telling you something. Granted, it may not be something as profound as “I want to live,” but telling you they feel good or bad is something they will do.
Thank you for listening to them. You are loved.
Kroeme
So sorry that this is happening to you Wil. You and your wife are right to try and see what happens with the medicines for a week, and you are also right that your baby will tell you when it is time to let go. You will just know! Hang in there, and I will continue to keep you, your family, and Felix, in my positive thoughts.
Wil,
I would probably have done the same: to give him a chance and see how it works out. At least you’ll know u tried everything you could for him. A lot of animals such as cats and dogs, have thoughts and emotions everybit as much as humans, maybe they are not as complex as ours, but they have them neverthelees. Im not saying that as a animal lover as such, im saying it based on scientific research.
On a lighter note, I have posted a blog all about St Patricks Day from an Irish perspective. It might take your mind off things (well for a minute or two anyway). Click here for my blog
Hi Wil – I think we communicate with animals more than we realize, with body language and tone. There’s nothing silly about talking to Sketch and Felix like that. Even though they may not understand the words, I’m sure they understand the emotion and concern you were projecting. I wish more people believed that these types of bonds and communication existed! Both of your kits are in my thoughts.
Wil, I have to say that pets of any kind are unique. I mean I have two dogs and my best friend has a dog and cat. 2 years ago her mother had to very old pomerianians. It seems that there is a slight domino effect when it comes to close animals. The younger of the two poms got very sick and had cardiac arrest after weeks of sedimentary life. And the older once passed away in his sleep two weeks later. Sometimes animals are really connected. Maybe the two of them are connected. Also, I believe in talking to animals. I talk to my two dogs all the time as if they understand me. So talking to your cats is not a big deal. You are not crazy or anything. It is just something that happens to pet owners. We do not see them as pets anymore, but as one of the family. They can not talk back, but you understand their vocalizations and expressions. It is perfectly fine. Sending mojo to you and the family everyday.
PS-You rocked in CSI. Even my friend who watched CSI on a regular basis says you were great as a crazy guy and did not have a clue it was you until I told her. I even had to do a double take when I saw Walter. Very scary man. Keep doing a great job, you will have an Oscar on your shelf soon.
Hi Will. I’m a new reader to your weblog. I decided to pay closer attention when I saw your excellent acting work in CSI recently.
I did as you requested and sent some healing thoughts to your household. It’s good to see some clarity has come from it.
As I was reading through this post I was able to tune in and get a clear sense of what Felix wanted. I’m very happy you came to the same conclusion. I also have another tidbit from Felix if you’d like it. He is processing the emotions of the youngest child and the mother. It seems to be unresolved grief, anger and frustration (resentment) involving the son’s father. So he is being his little animal healer hero self right now. And he is totally grateful to be heard and supported.
He’s showing me three things that would help besides what you have planned. He wants to be next to “green”, he wants to be held in your arms outside next to a big healthy tree, and he wants his favourite snack. (It looks like some whitish substance in a small bowl – thicker than milk – or so it seems to me) and again he looks to be outside.
Hi Will. I’m a new reader to your weblog. I decided to pay closer attention when I saw your excellent acting work in CSI recently.
I did as you requested and sent some healing thoughts to your household. It’s good to see some clarity has come from it.
As I was reading through this post I was able to tune in and get a clear sense of what Felix wanted. I’m very happy you came to the same conclusion. I also have another tidbit from Felix if you’d like it. He is processing the emotions of the youngest child and the mother. It seems to be unresolved grief, anger and frustration (resentment) involving the son’s father. So he is being his little animal healer hero self right now. And he is totally grateful to be heard and supported.
He’s showing me three things that would help besides what you have planned. He wants to be next to “green”, he wants to be held in your arms outside next to a big healthy tree, and he wants his favourite snack. (It looks like some whitish substance in a small bowl – thicker than milk – or so it seems to me) and again he looks to be outside.
If it helps, my husband and I fed our sick kitty through a tube in his throat for several months before he was finally ready to go. He was perfectly fine with it and after freaking out over having him look like a science fair project (not to mention the unholy gurgling), we all did okay. 🙂
But I never make a decision about putting an animal to sleep until I talk to Linda Thomas at http://www.ispeakanimal.com/. She’s the best remedy for that awful confusion that I’ve found and is a genuinely soothing presence.
My thoughts are with you all.
Wil
I hope your cat gets better. I think that you will know what to do when the time comes (with input from said kitty of course). wether to give up the ship or to batten down hatches and ride out the storm.
includeing the cat in this choice is not crazy! i think its the sing of a responseable pet owner (or in the case of cats “roommate”).
good luck to you and yours from mine and myself! C.
I wish the best for Felix, and I think you are taking the best course of action.
Don’t feel weird about talking and listening to your cat. Some people talk to their plants. A cat has got to be at least twice as smart as a plant. At least our cat is. He makes it very clear to us when he wants something. Although our cat may be a bit of an anomaly since he can speak English.
Hey Wil, I talk to my Unix servers all the time and it works the same way… 😉
If it works for machines, one can expect that it would work much better on mammals.
Continued mojo for both Sketch and Felix, as well as some for you and Anne as well. I wish you guys nothing but the best of luck. Hope both of your kitties pull through!
Dogs have been shown to learn multiple languages (show dogs raised in one country knowing only the language they were trained in having to relearn commands in a second language). Dogs and cats do have obvious emotional responses to people.
It is not a far stretch to say that you know your cats’ moods and how they are feeling based on their outward behavior displays. They certainly display empathetic behavior, when you are say, ill, for example (anyone whose ever had a cat that would not leave their side when ill can attest to that).
I will add to those telling you that you will indeed know when it’s time to help them from this existence. That you and your wife are watching for it will make it easier for you to know when it comes. Both of you are working to not hang on out of the wish to keep them around.
I had a fine companion, a huge orange tabby named Cyr, who spent more than 19 years with me. As he aged it became apparent he was failing (he had lost a tremendous amount of weight and could no longer jump to height), but he was still happily being a cat, if a shadow of his former self, until one day he just didn’t stand up. He was simply done, but could not find the door out, so to speak on his own.
So he laid in my lap overnight until we could take him in. When it becomes truly time, you will have no problems, other than the sadness due to their passing, taking the appropriate step because you will know clearly that it is the right step.
Trust your heart, Wil. It won’t steer you wrong.
It’s true that different cats will respond differently to treatment, and I can’t speak to some of the vitamins and supplements your vet is suggesting (I’m sure they’re all good), but I know, first hand, that daily Sub-Q fluids can make a HUGE difference in the quality and duration of the cat’s life. The thing is, when the kidneys aren’t functioning properly, they’re not ridding the body of toxins well enough, and that will make your cat feel really crummy. Sub-Q fluids help flush those toxins out and consequently the cat feels much better and for a time -like I said in another post, sometimes up to 3 years or so- the cat actually is healthier. The blood tests will reflect that as well. It’s definitely worth giving daily sub-q fluids a try. And I don’t think there’s anything odd about your talking to your cats the way that you do. It’s probably the most normal thing you’ve ever written 😉
It IS NOT stupid to talk to your cats. 🙂
Sometimes when you need to talk to someone, and there are no humans around, your pets always seem to know how to help. They always seem to know that you need to talk, and they will appear to listen, even though you KNOW they can’t understand you. If you love them, and treat them as well as you know how, they do the same for you. This is not anthropomorphizing the animals, that’s just the behavior of all social animals (except some humans). Your family (animals included) form a social unit, and the cats know when you pay attention to them, and WILL let you know, one way or another, exactly what they need from you.
Now, it does seem to work with ‘puters too, for no real sensible reason, but that’s just how it is with us biologicals. 🙂
Sending some kitty mojo your way.
It’s true that different cats will respond differently to treatment, and I can’t speak to some of the vitamins and supplements your vet is suggesting (I’m sure they’re all good), but I know, first hand, that daily Sub-Q fluids can make a HUGE difference in the quality and duration of the cat’s life. The thing is, when the kidneys aren’t functioning properly, they’re not ridding the body of toxins well enough, and that will make your cat feel really crummy. Sub-Q fluids help flush those toxins out and consequently the cat feels much better and for a time -like I said in another post, sometimes up to 3 years or so- the cat actually is healthier. The blood tests will reflect that as well. It’s definitely worth giving daily sub-q fluids a try. And I don’t think there’s anything odd about your talking to your cats the way that you do. It’s probably the most normal thing you’ve ever written 😉
Never doubt for a moment that you communicated with your kitties, or that they communicated with you. I hope the treatments work for him. Lots of Kitty Mojo.
~Cheal