I think I have 81 cubic feet of solid mucous in my head. When I blow my nose, it’s thick and dark yellow — that means I have an infection, right?
Note: The preceding two sentences were awfully gross, and shouldn’t have been read by the squeamish.
So I never got around to watching Star Wars yesterday. Instead, I read about half of Aces and Kings and studied Harrington On Hold’Em
. Aces and Kings is really fantastic, man. If you liked Big Deal
, Biggest Game In Town
, or Diary of a Mad Poker Player
, you’re going to love Aces and Kings. And Harrington on Hold’Em is officially the most useful and easy to understand poker book for advanced players I’ve read. If you’re serious about winning tournaments, it’s totally worth the investment. (Winning Low-Limit Hold’Em
remains the best for beginners, if you’re keeping score at home.) In fact, I like these books so much, I think I’ll write reviews of them at Amazon when I reduce the mucous in my head to a more manageable 11 cubic feet.
Note: The preceding sentence was awfully gross, and shouldn’t have been read by the squeamish.
When I finally did watch TV, I watched this fantastic old movie called Fail-safe, and some episodes of Futurama. Speaking of Futurama, what the hell is wrong with [adult swim]?! They took Futurama off to run American Dad?! Are they high? Worst. Cartoon. Switch. Ever.
Today I think I’m doing some more Cold War thrillers: The Spy Who Came In From The Cold, and the original Manchurian Candidate. Then I’m loading up on cold remedies and sleeping a whole bunch, so I can hurry up and get better.
I have to be well by tomorrow, because we’ve got a couple of reviewers coming to see ACME: A Day In The Life, and a head filled with mucous really interferes with my funny.
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I don’t think “American Dad” is that bad, but yeah…taking “Futurama” off is a crime against humanity.
Um, yellow isn’t necessarily bad. Just watch out if its brown or orange-y. American Dad? Its orange-y and should be removed immediately! (And mint tea helps a stuffy head, so I’ve found)
You should really have put that note *before* the awfully gross sentences.
You need to get that checked out, dude.
Suggest you add Seven Days In May and On The Beach to your cold war viewing.
ON THE BEACH and FAIL SAFE were originally novels. The film versions are much better, IMHO. George Clooney remade FAIL SAFE as a live TV event a few years ago. He played the bomber pilot. The older version is better.
And I could smack [adult swim] for dumping FUTURAMA again. Thanks god I have it on DVD.
Hope you feel better soon.
Hot milk, honey and a generous portion of whisky – that usually works when the only thing in my head is yellow and sticky.
Good luck!
Note: Thursdays on AS is “new cartoon night.” They play different cartoons than the rest of the week, usually at 12 AM Eastern. I have to agree, I would prefer to see Futurama, but what do you do? Take heart, we get it 4 other days a week!
I’ve dealt with way more gross stuff than that. You’re gonna’ have to try harder than that to gross THIS gal out! :p Seriously, you poor thing, I hope you feel better soon. Maybe you should try some chicken soup. I’m sending loads of extra-positive, extra-healthy vibes your way, Wil.
I grew-up with brothers. It’ll take more than THAT to gross me out. Sorry Wil. Nice try though (E for Effort) lol :-p
Futurama is WAY better than American Dad. Not even a contest, really. Neither will ever compare to the Simpsons though. 😀
Ermm . . yeah, yellow is generally not a good sign. Green is worse.
If your fever’s about 100F, or so, I’d suggest getting checked out by a physician.
Also, don’t let them thrust zythromax (AKA the z-pack) on you. That stuff is useless.
PS Wil, if your sick-self needs some entertainment, check out:
http://www.phobialist.com
for a good chuckle. 🙂
Take a wasabi-sake shot. That’ll clear you up like nothing you’ve ever known. And don’t worry about the burning sensation in your head, it’s just your brain melting.
Take a good portion of wasabi, (and if you’ve never had wasabi, a good portion is about the size of your pinky nail), put it in your sake and swallow it down.
If your mucus is green, then you have an infection. Then you need to worry, although it does mean that you are getting over it.
Poker: no interest here. If it floats your boat, go for it.
Futurama: Maybe if they were making new cartoons I’d be more upset about it being taken off the air. But you can only see those same two dozen or so cartoons so many times without going postal. Don’t get me wrong, I love Futurama, but it’s one of those things that I’ve seen them so many times that I’m at burnout.
American Dad: Stupid cartoon. Really. If I wanted to watch cartoons about Republicans, I would watch Saturday Morning Cartoons.
As others have said, Yellow Not Bad. Well, annoying as hell, but likely not an infection. You can get even get thick yellow snot from allergies!
Old Moose’s Sure Cure for the Evil Cold: Craploads of rest & fluids. Drink drink drink. Doesn’t matter what, well, except no alcohol. Unless it really does bother you, feel free to ignore the “avoid caffeine!” warnings you hear. You *want* to pee lots. You *want* to sleep a ton, wake up, pee your brains out, drink a few gallons, lather, rinse, repeat! Flush those bugs right out of you!
Er, Sorry to be a bit graphic, but then, after yellow snot it’s all downhill anyway.
Feel better soon.
Looks like it’s time for a trip to the book store for me, to pick up Aces and Kings and the Harrington book. I’ve been playing in an Amateur Poker League (http://www.amateurpokerleague.com) tournament game every Tuesday night for the past three weeks, and I made it to the final table this week, finishing sixth. I could use some more tips on tournament play, so I’ll see what Mr. Harrington has to say.
Get well soon; ACME needs your funny at its best.
Imagine if they made of movie that ended like Fail-Safe today. Yeah I can’t really either.
Hello Wil,
I’ve always heard that green mucus means you have an infection. Anyway, good luck and feel better soon.
If your going to watch cold war movies, you’ve got to see Dr. Strangelove. Best. Comedy. Ever.
Lee
usually thick yellow for me means I’m sick.
I recommend (this actully can help, I swear!) making a mixture of 1/4 teaspoon salt mixed with 1 cup warm filtered water (the chlorine in tap wter can further irritate your sinuses). then you snort it. In the nose and spit out the mouth. How’s *that* for gross? Seriously though it helps cause then you can blow a lot of junk out plus the salt does good stuff.
~the girl @ crushedglass.net
Hey Wil. I recently got over the head full o’ mucus bug. During the worst of it, I had to spend a day editing a documentary (it was a three day workshop – Day 1 plan, Day 2 shoot, Day 3 edit). I couldn’t put it off and I didn’t want to gross out my editor and co-director, so I took some Day-Quil cold medicine. Dried me up, stopped my cough, got me through the day. Gave me a bit of a buzz, and I had to remember to take it every four hours, but I don’t think I could have sat through 14 hours of editing without it. Might help get you through your performances at least.
More get well Mojo.
Yellow Mucous, eh? Hmmm. . . .
You know, if you have any cracks in your walls that need filling, I’ll be that yellow mucous would work just fine to fill them.
Note: The preceding sentence was awfully gross, and shouldn’t have been read by the squeamish.
Note: The preceding sentence was stolen from Wil Wheaton’s blog and shouldn’t have been ripped off and used by me.
Wil, grab for the decons and drink plenty of fluids. (Beer is considered a fluid, no? And it’s not just for breakfast anymore.)
Be careful with the yellow! Nurse Phil (that’s me) says it can develope into Bronchitis. Especially if you are worn down or not resting..for example…doing a show..
“The now increasingly thickened mucous become mixed with shedding cells, white blood cells, primary or secondary bacteria’s and/or viruses. When the bronchial tubes are not infected, the mucous produced is usually clear and white in color. As more and more of cells that line the bronchial tubes die and shed the mucous becomes thicker and more opaque. As elements of infection are mixed in the mucous turns yellow and then as infection builds turns to a light greenish color and then if the process continues to it may become darker and darker green. When mixed with red blood cells from severe infection the mucous will turn eventually turn to a brownish color or even bloody in nature.”
Get thee to a doctor Wil!
Hope u feel better…we are gonna try to get up to LA to see your play..it looks like it may be a good one.
Here is the link that goes with that quote:
http://www.well-net.com/prevent/bronchit.html
Two words
MUCINEX WATER
MUCINEX WATER
MUCINEX WATER
MUCINEX WATER
MUCINEX WATER
MUCINEX WATER
(it’s a new OTC drug that is WONDERFUL for getting rid of the head congestion)
See your doctor anyway!
I had a similar problem a couple of weeks ago, and I discovered something amazing. You know what does a good job fixing this problem short-term? Altoids gum.
Seriously.
Wil, if you liked Fail Safe, check out Deterrence, with Kevin Pollak: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0158583/
I’ll just second the “snorting lightly salted water” suggestion. It’s super-gross, like “getting a wave up your nose at the swimming pool” gross, but it can REALLY help. It’s what my doctor recommended when I had crap like that. It clears things out without drying out your poor, battered mucus membranes.My personal remedy: Equal parts (a large shot) lemon juice and whiskey (Old No. 7 if available), plus a huge dollop of honey and 6 whole cloves in the bottom of a BIG coffee cup. Add boiling water and stir. Sip, gargle, sip.Get well soon!
Ew, ew, ew.
I just can’t stop reading all these horror stories and remedies.
Thank goodness my dad is sick, which means I’ll get to experience the joy of the Creeping Crud very soon!
Can’t take feeling this left out much longer. Get better, Wil. Seriously.
Add “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” to your cold war movie library…..doesn’t sound likely, but I swear it is a total allegory…
Wil, you have an infection. Go to a freakin doctor and get antibiotics. You may not feel better immediately, but it will get you better. And I disagree about the mucous interfering with the funny. Your notes made me laugh out loud.
It looks like Futurama will be played Mon-Wed on [adult swim]. It’s funny, a couple of weeks ago they were bragging the Futurama’s ratings were the highest they’d ever been. And how do they celebrate? They cut it back to 3 days a week. it just doesn’t make sense.
Wil, I’m not sure that watching movies about the Cold War will help with your War on Colds. Enjoy the movies anyway, and good health to you. If you’re still sick after the movies, try Dr. Strangelove. Best Nukular War Movie out there.
I agree with the going to the doctor advice – get some antibiotics on board if they’re warranted. And the saline sinus washes will help. I have one other thing to add. My mother-in-law is an RN and she gave me the best remedy ever when it comes to the head-full-of-crud diseases. Mix any flavor Gatorade with either Sprite or 7-UP, about half and half in a big glass and sip on it every waking moment. The Gatorade helps you stay hydrated, the soda feels good to a scratchy throat – and the whole concoction helps to thin out that mucous and get it moving. It really works. Really.
Feel better.
Technicolor snot is definitely an infection, so get thee to a doctor now!!
Ok, so now for something that has nothing to do with anything really:
I saw an episode of Blind Date with Phil Gordon on it at 1AM this morning, as I was awake trying not to cough to death. And man, did he ever think himself quite the stud. He even bragged about his 4th place finish in the world championship and how he’d won 400 grand. He turned down a dip in the hot tub with an alleged lingerie model. The whole thing was just weird. And funny.
Oh the redundancy of saying “1AM this morning.” I so apologize.
Get Better soon wil.
don38
Drink lots of green tea with honey.
Feh, phooey on [adult swim]. Just pick up the DVDs at Costco. $30 a season. I find it to be quite preferable to enjoy them sans commercials and on my own schedule.
yeah, yellow = infection.
I had this same cold-turned-to-sinus-infection a few weeks ago, and rather than do a course of antibiotics (too many possible side/after-effects, like yeast infection, etc.), I healed up the sinus infection with oil of oregano. it’s an excellent *natural* antibiotic/antifungal. it has other properties that could help you too (diuretic, toxin-flush, etc).
anyway, here’s some info, according to what I did to heal my sinus infection with oil of oregano:
– make sure you purchase only wild Meditteranean type oil of oregano. some products advertised as oregano are actually a different herb like marjoram, and the oregano you get on your pizza is *not* going to work in this way even if it’s actually oregano. the wild Mediterranean type is the only type of oil of oregano you can count on to have healing qualities, and is very concentrated.
– get the oil & some empty gel caps from a health food store (the oil will come in a bottle with dropper)
– for clearing infection I used 10 drops in a gel cap, twice a day.
– make sure to take each with a meal, or with milk (it’s so strong it will burn on the way down otherwise). you might have a bit of an aftertaste come up, but not unendurably so. you get used to it.
– fill each cap as you’re about to take it.
– once your mucous (and health) has returned to normal, cut down on the oil of oregano dosage, using what the bottle instructions recommend. er… I don’t think I’d put it under my tongue as recommended, personally, but that IS the most effective way to use it. a nurse I know told me she puts a couple drops under her tongue, holds it there until she can’t stand the burn anymore, then swishes water through her mouth & drinks as much as it takes to stop the burning. (yuk, is my thought there)
– drink TONS of water while you’re sick… it helps thin the mucous normally, but definitely during sinus problems it’s necessary
– avoid dairy products if possible (they thicken the mucous, normally)
I found that using the oil & drinking extra water worked great, because not only did the infection clear up, but my body went through a mini-detox at the same time (I smoke, eat too much garbage, take prescription drugs, etc. etc)… all this retained fluid in my body got flushed out, and although I felt a bit head-achey from toxins releasing also, it wasn’t overwhelming or sickening like other detoxification processes can be, just very mild.
anyway, sorry for the long-windedness, and good luck whatever you do to get well – I hope you feel better very soon!
l.
x
Fail-Safe is probably my favorite Cold War movie. The ultimate cold warrior in fiction is Quiller, featured in a series of novels by Adam Hall, a pen-name for Elleston Trevor (who also wrote Flight of the Phoenix, recently remade as a movie). I highly recommend the entire series. These can be hard to find sometimes, but are worth the effort.
Dude, you really should have watched “Star Wars”. Your other forms of entertainment sound great but… come on! They replayed episodes IV-VI on chanel 13 for the last couple of weeks on Sundays. Since I just recently purchase episodes I and II, it was really cool to watch and listen to the dialog in IV-VI. I think Lucas has done a better job of linking the whole series together than most give him credit for. Anyway, on a side note, “Toy Soldiers” played the other night on chanel 21, otherwise know as Telefutura here in Los Angeles. Totally funny to watch the film with our voices dubbed in by Spanish-Speaking youths. You should have heard the poor guy doing Wil’s voice with a fake Mafia accent in Spanish. Priceless.
I hope you feel better, Wil. It’s no fun having a head cold in the spring. No fun at all.
Hi Wil,
I’m a chemist and work for a pharmaceutical company.
Green/yellow mucus is generally a sinus infection.
For a sinus infection, I would take sinutab. Also place a towel over your head and place ur head over a bowl of steaming hot water. (Add olbas oil if you have it.)
If the infection doesnt ease within 48 hours, then you should go to your local doctor and get a prescription antibiotic.
I would not rush to take an antibiotic first, as it will ultimately weaken your immune system in the long run. They should only be used as a last resort. Take care buddy, get well soon
-Noel
I think I had about 70 cubic feet (clear colored) of that crap in my head, now blown out into what seems to be 2,000 tissues – but tree pollen is at its peak here in the DC area.
Note: The preceding rambling sentence were also a bit gross, and shouldn’t have been read by the squeamish.
Get to a doctor and get well soon. The stress of the last few weeks is catching up.
I second the green tea (decaf), especially if you develop that lovely postnasal drip tickle cough in the next day or two.
I’d like to second the oil of oregano recommendation, but beware it feels like drinking liquid wasabi. I’d plug your nose and follow the oil with a full glass of juice. The great thing about the oil of oregano is a) it’s a natural antibiotic and b) since the chemistry of the oil is so complex and each each bottle is unique in its composition, you will never become immune to it like you can with other antibiotics.
Another thing you might pick up from the health food store is echinacea throat spray. I had only ever heard of drops or pills until recently (neither of which worked miracles for me) but the spray has been great. A friend of mine told me he recommended the spray to a woman with an infection so bad she had a large lump in her throat. After one day of using the spray the size of the infection was reduced by more than half.
Hope you’re better soon, Wil.
Hi Wil!
I hope you feel better soon.
My favorite cold war-ish movie is “No way out”
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093640/
Great flick.
In response to Keith Coogan’s comment
I totally saw Toy Soldier’s in Spanish the other night it was hilarious!
I’ve seen other movies with Keith and never even realized it! I always just said “damn he reminds me of Wil Wheaton”
And come to realize your friends….that’s crazy….
Feel better Wil
Several of the above remedies would probably work, but if you are on the go as much as I am, just go to a corner pharmacy and pick up a bottle of a nasal salt spray, a few sprays in each nostril will help. If you keep this sinus infection for more than a week, see a Dr and get an antibiotic. Feel better Wil.
Wil, thank you for sharing your snot with us. I guess that means we’re family now.
People have probably already said this, but I’ll say it anyway.
My favorite cold remedies/treatments/suggestions of choice:
Carbonated beverages – helps free up mucus in the sinus passage (specifically the one from mouth to nose). Yeah, this means that you’re going to end up spitting into a kleenex or something, but it will do it without you having to hock the lugey up – which could end up breaking a blood vessel in the walls of the passage – you know you’ve done this when it tastes mildly (almost plesently) salty. When you swallow your sips, press your tongue towards the roof of your mouth, and tip your head back a little.
Herbal (preferably mint) tea with Honey. Starbucks’ Refresh blend works well for this too.
Rest – but not necessarily sleep. Go a head and watch those Star Wars DVDs, but be in a reclined position. I’m down with an (albiet milder) cold myself, and I’ve found that being reclined helps a lot. I spent today lying, propped up on blankets in my room, watching some Doctor Who.
Warm and cold beverages and soft (or semi-soft) foods – just the warmth or the cold can have an, albiet temporary, soothing effect on ones throat. Coffee, tea, ice cream, milkshakes, milk, soft crust pizzas (at least from my local Deno’s), chili, stew, etc, all have had a temporary soothing effect to one degree or another. The key here is temperature and texture. Soft crust pizza will work okay, cracker crust pizza won’t help that much and might even hurt some. Ditto with toast. With the case of the beverages, swallow the same way I suggested with the carbonated beverages. And with the milkshake – use a straw (it’s more fun that way anyway), and try to direct the contents on, should you have developed a sore spot around the roof of your mouth near the back, (you should be able to touch it with your thumb without triggering the gag reflex – the tissue is soft but if you gently push upward you should feel hard – that’s essentially near the sinus passage – IIRC) the sore point, it should help.
Also, the use of tea, and milkshakes, and various beverages and foods and so forth will have another important side effect – generate saliva (the tongue can dry out when you have a cold). This will make cough drops more effective. Once again, as the cough drops dissolve, swallow as I suggested with 1, and use your tongue to rub the cough drop against the sore spot, if you can without swallowing.
And finally, try to sleep on your back, not on your side – then you’ll end up with one nostrel clear, the other clogged
Just a few suggestions.
Long time fan, first time blogger. I read the “read this first” section, interesting stuff. Sorry to hear you’re under the weather…(I can’t believe how “talk-radio” that came off.) Last time I was sick was around Thanksgiving, I spent 3 days in bed watching The West Wing (
There was some talk about [AS], I have to say that I am a fan of American Dad but I don’t think it’s worthy of giving Futurama the bump, but then again, I don’t even think that American Dad is [AS] worthy. Too new. That’s like Pete Sampres getting bumped from Wimbeldon for the Quizno’s baby.
Feel better…
–ChipTheDip
Long time fan, first time blogger. I read the “read this first” section, interesting stuff. Sorry to hear you’re under the weather…(I can’t believe how “talk-radio” that came off.) Last time I was sick was around Thanksgiving, I spent 3 days in bed watching The West Wing (Good show) on DVD and humming Johnny Cash tunes, not becuase I’m a fan, though I am, but just becasue I could. Being sick does cool stuff to your voice. Call up a friend and sing some Ciaphas fom Jesus Christ Superstar, you’ll hit notes that you didn’t know were down there…
There was some talk about [AS], I have to say that I am a fan of American Dad but I don’t think it’s worthy of giving Futurama the bump, but then again, I don’t even think that American Dad is [AS] worthy. Too new. That’s like Pete Sampres getting bumped from Wimbeldon for the Quizno’s baby.
Feel better…
–ChipTheDip
Adult Swim has lost its mind. But, you know, in a bad way. I don’t understand why they insist on screwing with a good thing. It’s quite sad.
Futurama will live on! Er, that’s what my dvds tell me.