fifty-one seconds in the kitchen

I stood in front of the open refrigerator, and scanned the shelves. Anne spoke to me from the dining room.
“What are you doing?” She said.
“I’m thinking about having a Homer Simpson,” I said.
“Donuts and a beer?” She said.
I stood up, a pink box in one hand, an Arrogant Bastard Ale in the other.
“Yeah,” I said. “Isn’t that horrible?”
“What’s horrible,” she said, “is that I knew what you were talking about without looking.”
I opened up the box. A glazed donut clung to one side, and a devil’s food with rainbow jimmies rested next to it. The crumbs and remains of their brothers surrounded them.
“You want to join me?” I said. “There are two donuts left.”
“No. That’s disgusting.” She said. “I think I’ll have a Flaming Moe instead.”
“Okay,” I said, “I’ll get the cough syrup.”

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43 thoughts on “fifty-one seconds in the kitchen”

  3. Wil,
    Thats great! I hope your kids don’t know what your talking about, cuz if they do… Its time to unplug the tv, hehe.
    As always love the blog

  8. What could be better than beer and a donut?
    Why, beer and a cold pizza slice of course! Just watch you don’t tear away some of that cardboard with your slice.
    Beers – Ummm, cheers!

  10. Mmmm… beer.
    On the beer note, the resident beer expert in my office claims that Live Oak Hefe Weizen is probably the best Bavarian style beer in the world. It is not bottled and is only available in Austin pubs from April to August. There is no other way to get it (Texas law allows a brewery/pub to fill a grouler but Live Oak in just a brewery and I haven’t found a brew pub that will fill a grouler with someone else’s beer), so now you have a good reason to make another trip out here.

  11. Further proof that inside a good number of totally hot women, there is an inner Geek just waiting to get out and poke around, have some fun, be a dork every once in a while.
    Kudos to Anne for letting her inner Geek out for a walk!

  13. I worked in Fort Worth, TX, on avionics software for a non-US fighter jet. The group had a milestone celebration and they served beer, doughnuts and salad.

  14. A Flaming Moe is a drink Homer actually invented on The Simpsons.
    Sayeth the WikiPedia:”His claim to fame was the “Flaming Moe,” a lit specialty drink whose secret ingredient is Krusty the Klown brand cough syrup. The “Flaming Moe” provided the bar with its one brief era of incredible success. It stood to make him a fortune, until Homer, the true inventor of the drink, exposed the secret ingredient, allowing several competitor knockoff drinks to spawn.”

  15. Ok, I was going to ask the same question. I thought it was just that I don’t drink anything stronger than Starbuck’s passion tea lemonade but it’s just that I’ve never watched the Simpson’s. Sigh. Out of touch, I guess.
    I agree with the earlier poster, however, that the donut sounds really good. Haven’t seen one of those in this weight-watcher, nutritionist-following household in a long time. Again, sigh.

  17. Y’know, I just started reading up on brewing my own beer. I honestly can’t think of making my own donuts to go with it, tho. That would be horrible.

  19. Hi Wil,
    My first post (in the words of Homer “WOOHOO!”), been a lurker ’til now. I know that you had mono a short while ago and not sure what your doctor told you, but you might want to avoid alcohol for awhile. I had it back in 1988, was only down for about 2 weeks, but I was advised to not drink for a period of six months. The virus affects the liver, etc., etc.
    Great blog btw, found it through /. Thanks for championing the cause of us geeks.
    Later…

  21. Arrogant Bastard Ale is not only one of the greatest beers around, but one of the few that can truly do a good donut justice. Cheers!

  22. Personally, I prefer the Flaming Moe’s bastardized cousin, the Flaming Meax. That episode rocked, by the way…Moe sleeping with Shelly Long, and all.

  24. Ok, I had to google for the reference to ‘jimmies’, since I grew up referring to them as sprinkles.
    Gaaaaaah.

  25. If bored the donuts one might slowly distill a beer’s Water away and turn it into a Jellied Hop and Skip Straight to the filling of said Hallowed Donuts, thereby saving considerable room in the Ice Box.

  26. Bill,
    “Jimmies” is a term I grew up with in Massachusetts. I didn’t think a west-coast guy like Wil would be familiar with that terminaology either! (In fact, I am told that “jimmies” is derived from a racial slur, refering to the color of the chocolate sprinkles. Ever since I heard that, I am loathe to use it, but maybe it’s just a rumor without any facts… I’m surprised that wikipedia doesn’t say much about the origin of this term.) I had to convince most of my college friends that it was a real term. You may also be unfamiliar with drinking “tonic” or using the “bubbler”, but these are all correct terminology for “soda” (aka “pop”) and “water fountain”.

  29. I think I just picked up that there is a code being transmitted in this blog. Are these clues for that photo-blog puzzle that no one ever solved or is it a new game? No matter. I for one refuse to be lured in any more by our new black hole of a puzzle bearing masters. Back foul beast! Back, I say!

  34. I had to look up the term “jimmies” as well.. there was an episode of Teen Girl Squad that used the term and I was dumbfounded. Being from Kansas, yeah, its sprinkles. No fancy terms here.
    Hmm. I’m thinking about running to the store now to get some Krispy Kreme.. and microwaving them for 4 seconds. That is teh best, right there I tell you!

  37. Prof_rocko, let me assure you that we here in the great Northwest also have the slang term “bubbler”, but it denotes something much, much different.

  38. I love this entry! And the first time I ever heard of jimmies was from a Mass. friend. They were always sprinkles to me before, but now I don’t get confused and think it’s going to rain…

  41. There are no words to describe my reaction after reading the word “jimmies.” I’m not even going to try. This comment should just end this second.
    Official number of times I’ve hit “F11” instead of “Backspace,” after typing this comment, is 15.

  42. There are no words to describe my reaction after reading the word “jimmies.” I’m not even going to try. This comment should just end this second.
    Official number of times I’ve hit “F11” instead of “Backspace,” after typing this comment, is 15.

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