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notice whom for wheels are turning

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Yesterday, I woke up feeling about 50% of normal. It’s the closest I’ve felt to normal since I went in for surgery, so it was a huge improvement. I got all the way up to about 70% by the late afternoon, but was back down to 50% by the time I went to bed.

I feel pretty much the same, this morning (maybe slightly better than last,) and all kinds of brown goo is coming out of my nose, so I guess I’m healing up and my body is kicking shit out that needs to get out. This is probably why I’m feeling steadily better.

I miss writing and blogging, but I have to assume that following my doctor’s instructions and fully embracing Operation Do Absolutely Nothing But Watch TV And Sleep has a lot to do with the massive turn for the better I’ve taken in the last 24 hours.

I almost ruined everything, though, last week. Anne was out at a class, and my back was hurting from sitting at a 30 degree angle for several days in a row, so I thought I’d take a warm bath to relax it. Still hopped up on painkillers and shit, I made the bath too hot, and by the time I realized that I was sweating like Roger Ebert (about 15 minutes later) and got out, the damage had been done: the hot water relaxed my back, but it also relaxed all the blood vessels in my body — including the ones in my sinuses that we want to keep, uh, not relaxed and not bleeding — and was, according to my doctor, "the absolute worst thing" I could have done for recovery. In 15 minutes, I undid about a week’s worth of healing, had a massive sinus headache, blood coming out of my face, and generally felt like shit.

I was furious with myself for being so stupid, which raised my blood pressure, which made me bleed more, which made me more mad, which made my headache worse . . . you can see where this is going. It took me two days to fully calm down and accept that I did something profoundly stupid, had nobody to blame but myself, and would just have to wait it out until my body undid the damage and put me back where I was before The Bathtub Incident.

(Oh, and for a big bonus, the swelling I gave myself made me snore again, pretty much canceling out one of the main reasons I had the surgery in the first place, and forcing me out of my own bed so Anne could get a good night’s sleep, which she needs now more than ever, because she is doing literally everything in our house while I sit on the couch.)

So when I woke up yesterday morning, feeling better than I have in the last three weeks, it was worthy of some celebration! I moved from one side of the couch to the other, and there was much rejoicing.

I feel congested on the left side this morning, which is where my body is dumping the brown goo. I’m pretty sure this qualifies as progress, but it’s also kind of gross. I was hoping to upgrade my status today to 60% of normal or better, but I think I have to be realistic and stay at 50%. At least I don’t feel irritable and irrational any more. That was really getting to be a problem for me.

I see my doctor again tomorrow, and if everything looks good, I’m supposed to get my stitches and splints out, and there will probably be some vacuuming of goo out of my head as well. If I’m real lucky, I’ll be cleared to drive and start getting back to my life.

Oh! I’ve been able to fucos enough to read again, so I’ve been re-reading Dark Knight Returns (in Absolute form) and I started The Atrocity Archives. The Atrocity Archives is fucking brilliant, and as much fun to read as advertised. I highly recommend it.

It’s absolutely beautiful here today. I think I’ll suspend Operation Just Watch TV and throw the switch on Operation Sit In The Sun And Read A Book On The Patio For An Hour Or So.

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26 February, 2008 Wil

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our princess is in another castle, comrade → ← in a room without a window in the corner

56 thoughts on “notice whom for wheels are turning”

  1. Exurban Mom says:
    26 February, 2008 at 10:51 am

    So glad to hear you are improving! Does ODANBWTVAS allow for watching Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles? I remember your audition and wondered if you were enjoying the show. I think the show absolutely does not suck, myself.

  2. ElizabethDay says:
    26 February, 2008 at 10:58 am

    I’m glad to hear you’re getting better. I hope you’re back to normal soon, I’ve been missing your posts!

  3. DPoem says:
    26 February, 2008 at 11:01 am

    Wil. I do miss your writings, but if you tell me again how great and perfect the weather is there, I am going to fly out and slug you in the nose.
    Don’t worry. I’m just bitter. Besides, I think after doing nothing but shoveling snow pretty much every damned day for the past three months, I’m not too sure I could lift my arms to do any real damage.
    Get well soon! And, if you need to put any sort of ice on that nose, I’ve got several tons sitting in my backyard doing nothing.

  4. stoolpigeon says:
    26 February, 2008 at 11:10 am

    Get all better.
    Return to entertaining me.
    Soon.
    But don’t rush it. Seriously, we need to take the long view here.
    I intend to be reading what you write for a long time.
    If that means no bathing – so be it. I’m worth it. 🙂

  5. Bob N Mel says:
    26 February, 2008 at 11:19 am

    You dodged a bullet with that bath, Wil! Oy vey. It does us good, though, to hear that you have bounced back on track. Keep us posted!

  6. John Bell says:
    26 February, 2008 at 11:42 am

    Wil, glad to know the Bathtub Incident didn’t do permanent damage. Get better, man.
    I hope Anne isn’t going too crazy with you on bedrest duty. 🙂

  7. Angela says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:02 pm

    So does that mean that after going through the surgery you’ll still snore forever or is that just a temporary set back? Oh, and I worked in medical for 13 years and I would have taken a damn bath too. 😉

  8. ALRO says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:07 pm

    man – i’ve got envie .. ok .. not about the black-sinus goop and all the pain and stuff.. but about the sitting on the patio and reading a book thing… I’m so totally Green!
    But with the nearly 2inches of snow we’re getting here today… that isn’t gonna happen for a long while! 🙁
    Enjoy the nice day – and i hope you have a good recovery from here on..

  9. ALRO says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:11 pm

    look at that – my french came out… Envie??!?!
    Envy even! *sigh*

  10. Wick says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    With all the crap coming out of your head, perhaps it would be a good time to watch “The Stuff”. Then again, maybe not…

  11. John says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:42 pm

    Wil, if you were hopped up on painkillers and shit, don’t give yourself too hard a time for taking a too-hot bath.
    Also, did your doctor specifically forbid the taking of hot baths? That is to say, how were you supposed to know that a hot bath would mess you up as badly as it did?
    Get better soon!

  12. vincentsmommy says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:47 pm

    Continue to get well and enjoy the sun! We’re just enjoying the snow/rain mix that keeps getting dumped on us each week here in the Midwest. I am so ready for it to be warm and sunny again.

  13. JennyW says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    Bummer about The Bathtub Incident. Who knew? I would have thought it a good idea at the time, too. You’re still having great influence on the world, too. Your lack of insightful and funny things to read has gotten me to do some writing of my own. Thanks!

  14. jonadair says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:51 pm

    I can’t believe your recovery is taking so long. I’m not quite sure what you had done up there.
    About 16 years ago had two turbinates removed and the septum straightened which massively reduced my congestion and allergy suffering. I remember the recovery sucking but nowhere near this bad especially once the packing was out. It seems like I was back to normal in two weeks.
    Hang in there. It was worth it.

  15. Mike Cohen says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:52 pm

    Glad to hear you’re getting better. Take care of yourself.
    In 2001 (the week before 9/11) I along with 20 other people lost our jobs when the major investor in the startup I was working for bled to death after he disobeyed his doctor’s orders and checked himself out of the hospital when he shouldn’t have.
    I’m enjoying great weather here. I went to the pool Sunday 🙂

  16. Celtic Mama says:
    26 February, 2008 at 12:57 pm

    Glad to hear you’re able to fucos again! Hope you’re back to 100% REALLY SOON!!

  17. swl-mom2Bryn says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:08 pm

    I gotta tell ya, I am in talks with an ENT about having sinus surgery, and frankly, I am now terrified. Just reading your posts about it have made me weak in the knees. I will keep up with your progress, as your outcome may sway my opinion of just how desperately I need to breathe through my nose.

  18. Wil says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:13 pm

    I can’t stress this enough: I haven’t had any serious problems, and the only real complication — The Bathtub Incident — was entirely my own fault. It’s clearly on my post-op instructions of things to avoid, and I just screwed up.
    The other side effects, like crankiness, fatigue, and all that, are a combination of me being a Type A workaholic and my own body’s unique reaction to anesthesia and pain killers.
    I don’t have any regrets, and certainly hope that I don’t discourage anyone from having a procedure done that could dramatically improve their quality of life.

  19. cybergeekspace says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:30 pm

    Ok Wil, that’s good to hear the encouragement for other people to have the surgery because you know it will be worth it.
    But doesn’t that also mean you are checking your blog and not reading/sunbathing/resting….?
    Resting=your new work (for now) so get back to the grindstone! (Glad you got rid of the scary bunny/dog/thing pic)

  20. Wil says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:33 pm

    Oh, and normal time for complete recovery from this type of surgery, as I understand it, is about six weeks. I’m only three weeks out of the operating room, so I’m doing quite well, all things (and my own idiocy) considered.

  21. Russe1l says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:44 pm

    Aha! So for all those playing, we’ve gone from condition: “Horta” to “Brown Goo”.
    And next time you feel you’re subconsciously trying to kill yourself.
    “No Wil I”.

  22. angie k says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:50 pm

    Glad to hear that you’re doing better, bath snafu aside. I’ll be sending you mental cookies and lemonade and hope Operation Sit on the Porch and Read a Book goes well!
    Wishing you continued progress!
    Cheers!

  23. Meg says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:57 pm

    Wil- I used to work for a plastic surgeon as a medical photographer (got to take cool gross surgery pics, as well as boring before ‘n afters.) I recall that he advised his “nose” patients to avoid direct sun for some time after surgery. Large hats and sitting outside under a shelter were okay, but not in the full sun. You may want to ask somebody at the dr’s office?

  24. dph134 says:
    26 February, 2008 at 1:59 pm

    Glad you are feeling better Wil! I did a similar stupid thing when I had my tonsils removed about a year ago. It happens.

  25. gbina says:
    26 February, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    Brown goo. Gross. I imagine goo is gross in general, but brown goo? Ewwww.
    Hope you admitted back to bed soon.

  26. Mike Belrose says:
    26 February, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    I’d rather have Wheaton at 50% is better than of most bloggers at 100%. Get well, and save some of the brown goo for SCIENCE.

  27. J says:
    26 February, 2008 at 3:21 pm

    I’m not much for commenting – mostly because I hate having to sign in again to comment and because I always forget my passwords and because I often do not feel I have anything to say that matters – I mean you get a bazillion comments a day, what’s one more.
    However, I just wanted to write and say feel better. I went through surgery last year and it was miserable having to wait out the recovery and everything, but it’s all worth it.

  28. jhankins says:
    26 February, 2008 at 4:11 pm

    When those stints come out of your nose, be prepared for your sense of smell to drastically improve and your airway to seem more open than ever before! But, also be prepared for major gross factor, toO!

  29. Topaz says:
    26 February, 2008 at 4:30 pm

    Wil, when you said you attempted a bath while on painkillers, I thought you were going to tell us you fell asleep and nearly drowned.
    Been there, done that.
    Well. I’ve fallen asleep in the tub a couple times. Don’t know that I’ve come close to actually drowning. But it sounds exciting anyway.
    I don’t know that you should whack yourself over the bath thing. As someone else mentioned, how would you know that was a bad idea? I wouldn’t put it together that too-hot water raises your BP. I guess it makes sense – when you think about it after the fact. But I probably would’ve done the same thing.
    Live and learn, m’dear. It sounds like you’re improving though and that’s a good sign. Patience is NOT one of my virtues so I understand your frustration.

  30. NickPowers says:
    26 February, 2008 at 4:47 pm

    OMG I stopped checking in for a few months and I come back and you got blood comin out yr face. That’s some ruff stuff. I’m moving out to LA in a few months after I finish school, trying to find something in TV (I’m not an actor). Any words of geek wisdom would be greatly appreciated (only after you’ve stopped hemorrhaging, of course – isn’t ‘hemorrhage’ a great word?). I don’t remember you being a buffy fan, but it makes excellent recovery tv-on-dvd, unless laffing hurts your face, then better to Netflix say, baddass Helen Mirren in Prime Suspect.

  31. Chris the Tiki Guy says:
    26 February, 2008 at 6:27 pm

    Glad to hear you’re on the mend, Wil.
    That’s really all I got. Except to demand that you continue mending.

  32. Kim Wilson says:
    26 February, 2008 at 7:33 pm

    Yeah for feeling better…keep it up cause we miss you here…too bad about the bath thing. I would probably have done the same thing too.
    I am ignoring the part about sitting on the porch in the sun, since i just came in from shoveling the several inches of snow that has fallen here. Spring is coming right? Right?

  33. mbrisby says:
    26 February, 2008 at 8:11 pm

    Glad you’re feeling better. Thanks for the book suggestion–_Atrocity Archives_ looks cool. You might enjoy one I recently finished: _Soon I Will Be Invincible_ by Austin Grossman. Somewhat like Alan Moore’s _Watchmen_.
    Stay out of the tub.

  34. Brian74 says:
    26 February, 2008 at 8:13 pm

    Ugh, sun we no see the stinking sun here in the Midwest. Get well soon and get back to life. Take your time though it will be waiting for you.

  35. Miss Ali says:
    26 February, 2008 at 8:30 pm

    It’s tough being sick and messing yourself up even worse. Don’t feel silly, I’ve done stuff like that myself. Recently. I drove 7 miles on a flat tire today and I didn’t even know. :-/ Feel better!
    -Ali

  36. R says:
    26 February, 2008 at 9:06 pm

    wow. that is alarming, Wil. (and far, far worse to live it, I’m sure!) No more baths for you, sir, and here’s hoping that you make it to 100% in short order.

  37. bloggerben says:
    26 February, 2008 at 9:27 pm

    Wil Wheaton. I am sorry to hear that you have health issues, but I it sounds like you have a good Doc and that’s important to be sure.
    I have a request of your community. I have decided that George Bush needs a good website so I am kicking off a wiki http://www.traitorinchief.com It would be swell if folks would come by and help us with a barn raising.
    Remember, only you can prevent totalitarianism.

  38. kristinalead says:
    26 February, 2008 at 10:02 pm

    Sending more {{healing vibes}} your way… xo

  39. camias designs says:
    26 February, 2008 at 11:40 pm

    I live in your neck of the woods and although today was a beauty of a day, the allergens floating by me, in my haste to absorb the pollenated air by ‘working out’ was enough for me to consider the surgery. I deal with horrible sinus issues. Having problems breathing out ones probiscus is never a walk in the park. Glad you’re on the fast track again. Consider Anne giving you a sponge bath next time…if she’s game at this point.
    Rest Rest Rest!

  40. Molly says:
    26 February, 2008 at 11:50 pm

    Glad your feeling better Wil! Hope you get some good news tomorrow! Fingers and toes are crossed. I myself have had the flu for 3 weeks now, yes 3 WEEKS! Ugh, so I can relate to the weird stuff coming out of your head! LOL :-S

  41. londonali1010 says:
    27 February, 2008 at 12:46 am

    Glad you’re starting to feel better, Wil! I miss your wit and charm 🙂

  42. S.E. Dogaru says:
    27 February, 2008 at 1:04 am

    ROFL ….your life amuses me sir.
    i look forward to the slightly embellished/ fictionalized version of this popping up in novella form some day.
    don’t you go dyin’ on me!

  43. Tara says:
    27 February, 2008 at 5:59 am

    I’m glad you’re feeling better Wil. It’s amazing how a little sunshine can make you go from 50 to 80% better. We miss you here, but keep doing what you’ve been doing (nothing) because we want you back whole and healthy:)
    ~~TARA~~

  44. Chang says:
    27 February, 2008 at 6:04 am

    My wife says you’re a very nice man to get this done for yours. So I guess I’m gonna have to go under the knife for the cure. I’ll have to make sure I load up on all the TV shows I haven’t watched so I don’t go insane during my recovery.
    Wonder how much it costs without insurance.

  45. Easycure says:
    27 February, 2008 at 6:41 am

    Wil!
    I had sinus surgery and it wasn’t even close to being that bad.
    I feel bad for you bud.
    Take care and get better.
    Easycure

  46. karmelrio says:
    27 February, 2008 at 7:05 am

    During the splint removal, try this: with complete intellectual distance, make note of how wide your eyes get as the splints are extracted.
    I didn’t feel any pain, just some pressure. But HOLY BALLS! The human body is an amazing, amazing thing. It’s like, “THAT came out of MY NOSE?” And…how did they get it IN? (It’s probably better that they anesthetize people for that part.)
    Glad you’re on the ‘up’ side of the curve… take care, kiddo.

  47. Gaerin says:
    27 February, 2008 at 7:50 am

    Moving from a side of a couch to another can be the first sign of expected fuc-osing; that’s how I understood it. I’m sure I’m wrong. Almost.
    I’m glad you didn’t have a cold bath after the hot one. Vasoconstrictive but makes very, very irritable and irrational.
    Take care bro.

  48. merindab says:
    27 February, 2008 at 9:58 am

    Just wanted to say hope you get well soon!

  49. Ryan says:
    27 February, 2008 at 10:26 am

    I miss home… rargh.

  50. Kris (Chicka Nuts) says:
    27 February, 2008 at 10:34 am

    Virtual vodka and chocolate coming your way.
    Hang out on the porch with more good books. Take time to heal.

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