This is crying out for a caption. I'll choose my favorite, and send something neat* to whoever writes it. Submissions open throughout the weekend, one per person, and can only be left as comments here (it's too difficult to track on Twitter or via e-mail).
*definition of 'neat' will be at my sole discretion.
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The invitation just said “Cast&Crew”. No one thought to tell Wil that they weren’t the only show in the building having a Christmas party that day.
Wil Wheaton discovers that Smufs are really Santa’s Elves.
Those poor elves are being strangled: they’re turning blue!
Now I just need a bottle of red, a bottle of white and some Barry. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.
Take your Smurfy paws off us, you damn Smurfy ape!
I thought I wanted to be alone. I guess I don’t.
Sadly, Santa returned to his workshop only to find that his elves had been “serial crushed by some huge friggan guy.”(the Abominable Snow Wheaton). His next call was to the family on Little People, Big World.
alt;
“Fawkes tries everything atleast once”
Wil Wheaton finally makes peace with the contributors to alt.wesley.die.die.die.
Having already gathered the acetylene torch, rooster, and bottle of vodka, Evil Wil Wheaton begins his next nefarious plot against Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
“Just what I always wanted. My own little army of Smurfs. I will name them by number, and I will hug them and pet them and squeeze them…”
One of these things is not like the others,
One of these things just doesn’t belong,
Can you tell which thing is not like the others
By the time I finish my song?
Did you guess which thing was not like the others?
Did you guess which thing just doesn’t belong?
If you guessed this one is not like the others,
Then you’re absolutely…right!
And all the little Smurfs, in their tiny Santa hats, realized their “Will Trap” had captured Wil Wheaton, not Will Farrel, their intended target. Worse, when they tried to release the Wheaton, he gathered the Smurfs unto him, for he saw his next “BBT” guest appearance theme…
We’ll buy your book already, for Smurfs sake!
Smurfs cloned themselves successfully 7 times. We couldn’t say the same about the eighth though…
The suicide smurfs knew that despite the fiery and explosive fate awaiting them, today would be their finest hour.
Alas! A cornucopia of love.
And the final ritual complete, Wil is welcomed into the Society of Short, Shirtless, Blue Men.
Wil Wheaton decides to practice for his upcoming audition for “Blue Man Group” and takes things a little too far.
Wil joyously exclaimed “SMURF’S, I AM IN YOU” .
They used to call him Wesley ‘The Smurf’ Crusher, but he’s really Wil ‘The Smurf Crusher’ Wheaton.
Wil re-imagines the Seven Dwarfs story. He thanks the dwarfs…err Smurfs for helping him save his sweet Smurfette.
So that’s why blood sausages are blue.
“Fearing that he could never get his hands on the Smurfs, Gargamel decided to use a beautifucation spell on himself and simply hug them to death.”
Although the vitiligo made him look odd, Wil was still accepted by his tribe.
When Chaos needs a happy place…
Although the vitiligo made him look odd, Wil was still accepted by his tribe.
Smurfs weren’t blue originally. Little people just turn blue when held too tightly.
Trouble with Smurfles
Once that camera’s turned off, I’m so selling you guys to Gargamel and spending Christmas in Hawaii.
Wil: “…and I like, totally hugged the crap out of seven smurfs.”
Dog: “Bullshit!”
Seven blue midgets, loving a man… covered in Thousand Island dressing. Is that making love?
‘Peace on Smurfs! Good Wil for mensch!’
“Turns out,” said Snow White to the wicked witch, “that the seven dwarfs look just like smurfs when you grip ’em round the neck for long enough.”
“Just keep pretending we’re the Seven Dwarfs, maybe he won’t turn us into gold…”
Angry Pedobear yells “TOO OLD” and “OFF MY TURF!”
Wil debuts his “Lady GAGAmel” costume.
Wil was determined to find out what color Smurfs turn when you squeeze’m real tight..
Wil was exuberant to learn that polygamy laws did not apply to Smurfs.
+3HP for the hug, but lose a turn due to creepiness factor.
This is the last the Axis of Anarchy saw of Fawkes.
“…and the elves,happy in their new home,lived merrily with their savior:Wil Wheaton,The Man Who Saved Christmas.”
On the 7th day of Christmas, Wil Wheaton gave to me…. Seven smurfs a-smurfing!
Aofel returned to find that the Feywild had changed somewhat during his absence.
Evil Wil Wheaton destroys the smurfs. Parents around the world are grateful.
After viewing Wil Wheaton’s audition tape, James Cameron realised his masterpiece would only work as CGI.
“I’m blue da ba dee da ba doo…”
I call the big one Bitey.
Ladies, look at your man now back to me, sadly he isn’t me but he could Smurf like he’s me.
7 Smurfs. 1 Wil. 0 Cup?