Pretty much all of Comicon was awesome. However, there was one thing that was decidedly not awesome, and though I had initially decided not to talk about it in public, it's bothered me since it happened, so I wrote about it on G+ earlier today.
I'm cross posting it here, though, because it's important to me:
On the way out of the Syfy party on Saturday night, a pretty horrible thing happened. I wasn't going to talk about it in public, but I can't stop thinking about it, and I think this needs to be said.
When I was a Teen Idol*, and I traveled to New York for publicity all the time, it was fairly common for a handful of super weird people to hang out all day in front of my hotel, or in the lobby of my hotel, so they could pounce on me whenever I tried to enter or leave, and demand as many autographs as they could. It was really creepy and awful, and I always hated it. It was more than a little scary. I mean, who in the world spends an entire day sitting in one place waiting for someone? Oh, I know: crazy people.
So, crazy people, pay attention: If you camp out in front of my hotel while I am on location or visiting a city, if you camp out in front of a party I'm attending … basically, if you camp out anywhere so you can shove a stack of 8x10s into my face when I'm trying to enter or leave a location, I'm not going to sign them, and I'm not going to be nice about it.
I refuse to reward or validate that kind of behavior, and I'm done being polite about it.
When we walked out of the SyFy party on Saturday night, a pack of people — probably 12 or 15, I'd guess — appeared out of nowhere, and surrounded me. They shoved pictures into my face, thrust pens at me, and made it so that I couldn't even move. They separated me from my friends and my son, and, quite frankly, terrified me.
Let's stop for a second and think about this: in what kind of world is it acceptable to surround a person you do not know, separate them from the people they are with, and essentially trap them? Maybe in crazy entitled psycho world, but not the world I live in.
I tried to scrawl my signature on a couple of things, just so some of those people would move and let me keep on walking, but whenever someone took something away, something new immediately took its place. Somehow, +Felicia Day saved me. She reached through the mob, grabbed my hand, and said, "Sorry, we have to go meet some of our friends," before the literally pulled me away, to safety.
This is when the mob lost its shit. They yelled at me like I had done something wrong. They called me names, and they booed at me. (Seriously). A woman stormed up next to me and said, "If you don't sign these things for me, I'm going to tell Twitter what an asshole you really are."
I don't respond well to threats like that. Though my instinct was to explode at her, I took a deep breath, looked her square in the eye, turned on my dad voice, and said, "Really? Are you serious? We're done here." I quickened my pace, and for the next two blocks she followed us, screaming and ranting and raving about how she'd waited there for hours, driven all the way from someplace far, and that I basically owed her as a result of her choice. I eventually tuned her out, and I guess she went back to the Syfy party to harass whoever else came out next.
The whole thing was really scary, made me feel like a sideshow freak, and made me really, really angry. I was just trying to walk out of a hotel and go meet up with my friends. I didn't do anything wrong, and I'm not going to apologize forgetting upset about it.
This is important: I realize that just about anyone reading this on my blog isn't one of Those Guys. Please don't think the "you" here refers to, you know, you.
This is also important: When your motto is "don't be a dick," a certain kind of person is vigilantly looking for moments like this when you can be accused of violating your own motto, thereby proving to the entire world that you are, in fact, a giant lying pile of shit. I'm fairly certain that reasonable people can see who the dick was in this situation, and hopefully agree that it was not me. For everyone else: go fuck yourself.**
In Dancing Barefoot, I wrote about signing autographs at conventions:
Over the years, I've learned something from this experience: it's never about the signature. It's about that brief moment, that brief encounter with a Star Trek cast member, that is so important to the fans. That 30 seconds or so of hopefully undivided attention is what they're really paying for, and I always do my best to make sure they get their money's worth. Contrary to popular belief, sitting at a table signing hundreds of autographs for several hours without a break is hard. It's not just mindlessly scrawling my name; It's stopping and listening to the always excited, sometimes shaking, always sweating, sometimes scary dude who wants to know exactly why I did “X” on episode “Y” and would I please sign his picture in silver, because Marina signed it in gold and now he wants the men in silver and the women in gold, and I hated your character and here are 25 reasons why and I expect an answer for each one of them and I'm not leaving until I'm satisfied.
The crazy people who camp out don't care about that brief moment, that brief encounter. The crazy people only care about taking a piece of $Celebrity.person and possibly selling it, or hording it, or … you know, I don't even want to think about where that path leads.But that's why they behave the way they do. It isn't about our work, or about saying "thank you" or "high-five!" or anything about that. It's about entitlement and being crazy, and I will not validate or condone that kind of behavior ever again.
I realize that a crazy person who thinks it's entirely normal and not psycho to camp out in front of a hotel for hours and hours so they can trap a person isn't going to understand why I will not validate that behavior, but I need to make this clear for the future: I'm a person. I am a human being and if you cut me I will bleed. I'm happy to sign things and take pictures with people in appropriate situations, but if some dude violates my personal space or freaks me out, and then gets mad at me when I try to get away from him, I'm not going to do anything beyond telling that person to go fuck himself, and I'm not going to feel bad about it. To paraphrase Neil Gaiman, I am not your bitch.
Finally: In before the inevitable "you're an actor and you chose this so you deserve what you get so suck it up because my life harder than yours because blah blah blah" comment (probably not here, but definitely at G+.)
*LOL.
**See? I don't even feel bad. (Well, maybe a little bit. I need to work harder on it, I suppose.)
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Exactly. I plan on going to SDCC next year, and if I do, I’ll probably wait in all the same lines because it’s worth it to spend time talking with people I admire about things we have in common, as well as telling them I love their work.
It is astounding to me that anyone would treat people that way, but especially you. You – of all celebrities I’ve seen – probably spend more individual time with your fans at autograph sessions than most other celebrities combined. It’s obvious you put a lot of thought and consideration in the time you spend with your fans… and every time I’ve stood in one of your lines that was the sentiment of everyone around me as well. You are highly appreciated for the effort you put into visiting with us… I hope you won’t let a couple of vultures dampen your spirit.
I have only recently started to read your blog but I have found that you are in the small group of people that the more I hear from the more respect I have for them. I think that alot of people unfortunately seem to forget that celebrities a) are people to and so are due respect and common courtesy, and b) generally have tons of people looking for attention from them and are likely to get burnt out with it at times. For all that I have seen and heard you are amazingly kind and do try to make sure that you respect your fans. I think you have every right to feel very angry with those that did this as they assaulted you, flat out, which is just unacceptable no matter who you are dealing with or what you may think they owe you. From the sounds of it you handled the situation amazingly well and much more civilly then they did. Oh and this just further increases the respect I have for Felicia if that is even possible at this point.
For what it’s worth I saw a lot of this over the weekend, and I’m not talking about excited fans meeting a favorite personality. You know something beyond fandom i$ up when the four hundred pound lady is carrying a stack of Nathan Fillion Glossies, and has no problem stiff arming the ten year old kid to get to him. It really sucks that this happened, and really you were lucky it didn’t get uglier than it did.
That’s terrifying; it seems too much like being reduced to a thing. I can’t imagine treating a person that way. I’m so sorry to hear about it, and I’m glad you got out.
That does sound uncomfortable. It’s too bad there isn’t a ‘Celebrity Off Duty’ hat with blinking red lights that you could wear, kind of like the ‘No Service’ sign on a bus.
However, I’m guessing even that wouldn’t chase them off.
A guy I know acts in movies. He was in a certain box office hit several years ago, and got quite a cult following of young ladies. Most were perfectly harmless, but a small sub-set of those fangirls created a weird online fantasy world with him as the centre of their universe. We’re not talking just normal fangirl stuff like crushes and photo swapping either; it went so far as their having their own made up language they used when talking about him so the “outside world” couldn’t share in their delusions. They arranged to go places where he would be to stake him out and would hang around all night waiting for him to get there, then wait for him to come out again after. They knew who his family were and where they lived, and they stalked his friends to try to get at him. The whole thing was really weird and unsettling. He took it all in stride (what a trooper), but they were seriously out of line a few times, and generally just creepy. So “respect” for what you’re saying here. Maybe some of them will see your post and realise just how disturbing it is for people to be grabbed in a pincer movement by a group of strangers. Give ’em hell, Wil.
A few years ago, during the Democratic primary, you talked about a joke comparing Hillary Clinton to a psycho ex-girlfriend. Like a lot of people, I disagreed with you about whether it was appropriate, but I had some particularly strong feelings about it, I think, and it came through in my comments.
I few weeks (a month?) later, I saw you at Super-Con in San Jose. You were utterly gracious, friendly, chatty, and charming. And that was AFTER you put together who I was with the comments and discussion on that post. I really appreciated that chance to interact with you, and you never made me feel like you were doing me a favour, or that you resented having to talk to this person who you’d already had one frustrating interaction with.
In other words, even in a situation where you COULD have reasonably been a dick, you still weren’t a dick. You win at not-being-a-dick forever, and I’m a fan forever because of it.
Haters can put on a red shirt and beam down with the bridge crew.
That’s terrible that you have to endure people like that. With such people out there, I can only imagine that it was a terrifying experience and something that you’d definitely not want to endure.
That said, you nonetheless continue to make time to interact with your fans, and for that I’d like to say we’re very grateful. Having had the pleasure of meeting you a few times, I can honestly say that you’re genuinely not a dick. Additionally, seeing your interaction with people around you in various mediums only serves to re-affirm that.
Quite simply, thanks for coming out to events and sharing your some of your very busy time.
Haven’t worked with the movie/tv people, but I’ve worked with and know several artists that have done work in comics, RPGs, and card games (including Magic during its heyday). I’ve seen the same “you owe me” behavior many times in Artists Alley at conventions like GenCon, Origins, and Emerald City Comic Con. I’ve watched artists spend their entire evening in their room trying to “catch up” on fan sketch requests instead of getting out to enjoy the show, socialize with the peers they so rarely see, or even get much-needed sleep.
if you haven’t read the sad story of why Adam Hughes no longer does con sketches, it’s a good read: http://www.ifanboy.com/content/articles/Adam_Hughes_Curtails_Convention_Sketching_and_Why_It_Matters
It happened now and then in the early 90s, and only got worse as eBay’s reach brought out the worst profiteers who would gladly lie to score a lucrative signature or sketch. And while I greatly enjoy the conversation that blogging and Twitter have allowed – those same tools also can enable some to have the very false impression that they “know” you, that you’re their “friend”, just because they get to read about your life outside of your work.
Yes, I get to know about you. My wife and I follow you, Felicia, and a handful of others. I can tell her while we’re making dinner that Ryan photo bombed you, Felicia, and Nathan – and she laughs without explanation. But just because I know these things… I don’t know you. You’re not my friend. I have no right to you. Some… those crazies… don’t realize that.
So by all means. Feel ok. Kudos to Felicia Day for yanking you out of the mess. You don’t owe that woman or any other crazy a damn thing.
And let us know how the beer turns out, hmmm?
I can’t decide if being one of the few honored convention celebs who doesn’t charge for their autograph makes this kind of situation more likely or less so.
It doesn’t do me any good to think rationally about these types of people because there’s apparently nothing rational about doing what they did.
I’m grateful for the item you signed for me at the 2010 ECCC every time I look at it and after I read about how you feel about handshakes from strangers (for good reason, I should add), I even felt guilty for not knowing the preferred procedure (“Iron Guard salutes”, etc.). 🙂
Fortunately, I believe there are a lot more people like us on your blog (and among your twitter followers) than there are people like this crowd outside the party (also reminds me of Ray Bradbury’s “The Crowd”).
And if this woman’s really going to post a tweet insulting Wil for his more-than-patient-and-mature response to her insanity, I have a feeling she’s really not sure how twitter works. 🙂
…and it would make my week if/when I could save a celeb from a crazy person someday. I wouldn’t even need an autograph or pic in return. 🙂
I’m so sorry that happened to you. I’ve loved meeting people at conventions ever since I had the epiphany that it’s just as awkward and awesome for the celebrity as it is for the fan. We’re both nervous (for different reasons), but we’re both hoping to have a positive and satisfying (if brief) experience. The famous person get a little piece of fan love, and the fan gets a little piece of attention from someone they admire. Everybody wins.
I honestly don’t understand how people can’t tell the difference between Wil Wheaton the Writer/Blogger/Gamer/Actor and Some Guy Trying to Hang Out With His Friends. Being famous is a job like any other, and nobody is their job 24/7. I used to live and work in San Francisco, and I would frequently hear stories about what a douche [random celebrity] is, and I always took those with a grain of salt. Here’s a real world example of how these typically go:
Customer: Robin Williams is a total dick.
Me: Really? How did you meet him?
Customer: Bumped into him in a restaurant. He wouldn’t even sign my napkin.
Me: What was he doing at that restaurant?
Customer: Eating dinner with his family.
Me: Get the hell out of my store.
Wil,
It is obvious that the intent of your post was to both vent and to put out an FYI regarding such mob-tactics and your intended action/reaction to such situations in the future.
There is another aspect to the story you told that is a bit tree-like as opposed to your forest-like description . . .
Your efforts are coming to a fuller fruition and you are achieving greater success in your first-love career. Being mobbed by a creepy autograph seeking crowd (as you were in your teen days) is an indicator of your increased popularity as an actor. Though this incident may be a less than comfortable indicator it is an indicator none the less.
Those unfortunate souls, in their mis-guided ways, were simply welcoming you to the new plateau to which your Hollywood Star has risen.
Though you may not feel like someone should say this about your mobbing, congratulations.
May you have indicators in the future that you find more pleasant.
Sorry people are dicks. It’s completely unacceptable. And yet another example of why some people shouldn’t be allowed to use social media…or you know, interact with the rest of humanity.
Given that I am claustrophobic and I find crowds aversive, I can’t imagine how scary that must have been. And irritating. You, of course, owe nothing to anyone. That having being said, because I rather enjoy your existence in this world, I feel I must say something about your above post. Undoubtably much of it came from an angry-will place, and justifiably so; however, the repeated use of “crazy” and “crazy people” is, in a word, offensive. It’s lasting form of oppressive language that does little to empower and engage those for whom ‘crazy’ is a diagnosis; a way of life. I am a mental health therapist, a mood-disorder sufferer and a big geek – not necessarily in that order. I think you’re wickedly clever and funny and I hope this note isn’t offensive to you. I hope you can understand that there are some of us who hope to reclaim this language and remove its power to hurt and stigmatise. 🙂
This made me remember this one time after a concert me and my brother hat to wait outside the venue for our ride back for hours. And eventually a guy from the band came out to get to his car and leave, and when he saw us we could see on his face we wasn’t expecting anyone and that he wasn’t to thrilled about it. we decided not to talk to him we just waved him goodbye. we didn’t get mad at him, the concert was over he wanted to go home as much as we did. he had no obligation to us.
Hey Wil, I saw you, Ryan and Adam Savage at a private party outside the Hilton after The Guild panel Saturday. My first impulse was to approach you guys and say hello or at least yell “Great Wootstock Show Guys!!” but I saw you and Ryan were having quality time so I went into fox grill and toasted Wootstock and Comic-con over a Stone IPA. Anyways!!…Great show this year. Can’t wait till the next one.
I’d rather have a beer and talk whatever rubbish comes to mind with someone than have their signature on the wall.
Until I addle my brains, my memories would last longer than a bit of ink on a photo.
It’s a shame the nutters of the world have to make it harder for the rest of us to meet the likes of your awesomeness.
It sounds to me like my friend the Secretary of Geek Affairs needs a Sgt. at Arms.
I’m just saying, qualified candidates are standing by.
S.
I’m no famous person, but when I was in the news a time or two (for Star Trek related events, oddly enough), the crazies actually crawled out of the woodwork, found out my phone number and started calling me with their insanity. It was awful and I can’t imagine experiencing that in person, faced with a mob of Teh Crazy. If I were as notable as you or Felicia, I would be hiding in my basement, gibbering, unable to face leaving my house, ever. I really dislike those people, because they make all of us fans out here look crazy and scary, and I wish it wasn’t so.
Allysa Milano recently posted about some creep harassing her to do something interesting for pictures. I like market solutions to things (or at least attempting market solutions — they don’t always work) and suggested she hire a photographer to take pictures and sell them to the tabloids or whoever wants them to flood the market and destroy any inventive for someone to follow her around.
I’d like to suggest something similar for you if this keeps happening (and I suspect it will as your career continues to grow). Sign a bunch of glossies and either hire someone or get a friend to *sell* them to these people at exorbitant rates. Continue giving your autographs away for free in the con at the autograph table because that is super, super cool of you. But make those people pay like $100 or something. And don’t interact with them. Let your friend/employee who they don’t care about do that for you.
I don’t know if it would work.
Seems there are a lot of us who enjoy your work, and want to acknowledge you when we see you without mobbing you or getting really creepy. I was thinking….Nathan Fillion has asked his fans to just give him a simple “captn” and a nod as they pass by him.
Is there something similar we can do, a sign or a phrase that will tell you “I’m a fan, and yet I respect your space”?
Wil,
You are a good person, and it’s a shame that much of the public punishes you and those close to you for having the gifts that you have. I just hope you don’t let it take away from the fact that there are those of us who support you guys because we appreciate what it is you do. Don’t be a dick, but don’t be someone’s Jack-In-The-Box either.
It’s interesting to see things from a celebrity’s perspective. I’m sure glad I’m not one of those psychos. Or one of those teen girls who bought the magazines just because there were pictures of Wil Wheaton inside…and Corey Feldman <3 and *sigh* Johnny Depp (!!!) and would tear them out and hang them next to her bed SO SHE COULD KISS THEM EVERY NIGHT BEFORE SHE WENT TO BED!!! 😀
*nervous laugh*
I’m sorry to hear this happened to you. Congratulations on reacting as calmly as you did. I’ve experienced what it’s like to be overwhelmed by people who think you owe them something, and it is very hard not to turn around and become someone you’re not, just for that moment when you feel angry and defensive.
I know you know we wouldn’t do that. We respect your space. (… the final frontier. HA! I made a funny) sorry.
She followed you for two more blocks just to yell at you?
wow.
I totally would have throat punched her for you.
And by throat punch I mean I would have gotten in her face and gave her the stank eye for being such a douche-ette.
Sorry this happened to you and I’m glad Miss Day was there to save the day.
Wow Wil… that is pretty freaky. I guess I hadn’t thought about what all you celebrities must go through, but that would be very disturbing. I really haven’t had the pleasure of having an “celebrity” experiences, except one time getting autographs from most of Chicago after a concert and they were returning to their bus. It was a designated fenced area where they intended to come by to sign for us.
It isn’t right for those “crazies” who act so entitled about it. I mean, yeah, you are a celebrity and in the public eye. However, as you said, you are still a PERSON. It’s perfectly natural to be freaked out when unknown people (who have been waiting for hours to pounce you) descend around you and won’t let you move. Someone could almost call that assault.
What is amazing is not just the way they pounced you and wouldn’t let you go, but also their reaction when you said you had to go. Any sane person, even if they were frustrated, would understand that you can’t just stand around everywhere all the time signing things. You are a person and do have a life.
Seriously, I have looked on Syfy but can’t tell when your episodes start. It’s been two weeks and no Parrish!
Wil,
Demanding an autograph only to sell it on ebay (which is the most likely disposition of that signature. The louder the demand that you sign, the greater that likelihood) is the height of dickery
So hey, instead of a talisman or relic from a person in that position, how about a salute? A nod? A quick “Wesley was a wuss, but you’re aces!” *when the situation is set up for it*.
Then you have spent your most valuable commodity – your attention – which should be recognized. Just as we have to recognize when the attention wallet is empty because it has been spent.
As a crazy person (with the paperwork to prove it), I’d rather not be placed in the same group as those who hounded you the other night.
They aren’t crazy. They’re selfish, obnoxious jerks with entitlement and boundary issues. In other words, regular people with no manners and no respect for others.
What happened sounds terrifying and it’s completely inexcusable. I’m glad Ms. Day and your friends were able to get help you get out of there. I’m also glad you’re taking a stand because otherwise these people won’t stop.
Just… I’m crazy. I’m mentally ill. A lot of the people I know are as well. We don’t behave that way. Please, don’t lump us in with aggressive, bad mannered people who do.
Thanks.
I’ve never understood the autograph hounds. Will, I met you years ago at the signing tables, it was slow and you called me over because I wasa wearing a linux t-shirt. We talked some geek for a while and I was eventually pried away by my companions. I did not get your autograph, but I did get an amazing opportunity to meet a guy, very like myself who just happened to be a celebrity. I have been an avid follower of your career ever since, and should I ever happen to bump into you somewhere, the only thing I’d shove in your direction is an ice-cold beer.
It would be nice to see you back at the signing tables again, though, but I seriously doubt you’d have any slow time there anymore. Maybe for next year, you can arrange to have the Klingon costume group as your body guards, now that would be kinda funny.
Dude. That’s horrible and totally uncalled for. I’m really sorry that happened to you.
Apparently, some people tend to forget that you’re human and you like your own private space, too. Personally, I’d rather just sit and enjoy a beer with you and talk about gaming and geekdom than have an impersonal autograph, courtesy of an ambush mob.
nice story.
at last year’s dragon*con by brother and i saw aver brooks waiting for an elevator. didn’t approach or say anything, just walked by and exchanged a “that’s so cool!” look with my brother.
Alan Lee came to my town once to do a book signing. I was behind a man with a big box of books. He put them on the table in front of Alan and said, “Go ahead and look through these and sign whichever ones are yours.” I was ashamed on behalf of the entire fen, that this lazy SOB OBVIOUSLY didn’t care anything about Alan or his work, just wanted to raise the resale value of his used books by getting an autograph.
These people are obviously in the same category. They’re not “fans,” they’re panhandlers–except they’re mooching for an “added-value” signature, not cash. It’s natural to feel outraged by such a blatant display of rudeness and greed. Good on you, for refusing to be their cash cow.
I think you’re right, it sounds like they were just trying to guilt Wil into signing, and didn’t care if he actually liked them or not. Not real fans. Although they were smart enough to know that a Wil Wheaton autograph would sell well. 🙂
I wouldn’t give it a second thought, Mr. Wheaton.
Wil,
I’m glad you feel that way.
At PAX Prime ’10 I stopped you on the street for a photo. It wasn’t actually for me, but for my wife. I honestly debated whether or not to even stop you, because you were not doing an official meet ‘n greet or signing or anything like that. You were on your own time, and I’ve always respected that in anyone, no matter how “famous” they are. However, in that moment, my desire to deliver an awesome opportunity to my wife won out over my normal “nah, just leave him alone” attitude.
She’d stood in line not once, but twice, when you were doing official signing and just didn’t get to meet you. The line was cut off both times. “Get there earlier,” you might say. Fair enough, but then it was friggin’ PAX! There were… distractions. So my wife was fairly disappointed that she hadn’t gotten to meet you. So there we were, headed back to our hotel after stuffing ourselves on delicious seafood, and the last thing on any of our minds was “I wonder were Wil Wheaton is” when we passed you. You were headed to the concert, and it was probably as coincidental as it could be, if you exclude the common denominator of both of us attending the same event.
I’d like to think we didn’t inconvenience you too much. We shoved no photos at you to sign, no stuff that could be auctioned off or any of that. It was very personal… my wife just wanted to meet you and maybe get a photo with you. She squee’d appropriately, thanked me profusely, bragged to her friends and inundated her collection of social media outlets with the photo. You were very cool about the whole thing, and I’ve always appreciated that.
BUT… if this was one of those occasions where you’d have preferred to have been let be… if we (more specifically me, being 6’4″, loud and it being dark out) freaked you out in any way… I sincerely apologize. Honestly. You were definitely not a dick, and I’ve been forever appreciative of that opportunity you afforded her, but I can certainly see where incidents such as that could be bothersome and even annoying. So really, don’t be afraid to just say “I’m off the clock” and carry on with your own life. For people like us, people who aren’t crazy, we’ll understand. I was glad you stopped and shook our hands, and even posed with her for a photo. But had you preferred not to, anyone who’s not a total dick would understand. And those that don’t… well, like you said… they can go fuck themselves.
Man that is awful. really liking someone and admiring their work is one thing and if you get the chance to SANELY tell them that you should since being complimented or valued or always a good thing. But to violate someone’s sense of self, or safety and invade their life is totally unacceptable, and you have every right to be freaked out and react like any sane person would by defending yourself. Make these idiots realise that you are a person, you and your work should be valued, and your time with friends and family respected. After all, if you really like someone, that’s what you do.
There was a piece in The Stranger, a Seattle newspaper about how canvassers are guilty of similar harassment. Here is the link, in case you are interested in their take on it.
http://www.thestranger.com/seattle/dear-street-canvassers-stop/Content?oid=8525385
Damn. So I guess waiting outside Comics Odyessey and Zankou Chicken everyday for the last four months to meet you is probably not the best strategy then? Now, where am I supposed to go for the day when my wife thinks I am at work?
I kid I kid!
I wouldn’t let a bunch of Delta Bravos ruin your fun or your feelings to your true fans my man.
It definitely shows a disturbing lack of boundaries and don’t be a dick-ness, not to mention a good dose of extortion with the whole “do this or else” element in there. Sadly, actors aren’t the only ones who have to deal with at. Ask any doctor who has ever tried to have a meal in peace when a patient spots him or her. From personal experience, I can tell you that English teachers are often asked to edit papers written outside of class, not for an assignment, because clearly we have nothing better to do during our office hours that to mark up student papers. And yeah, it does make you bitter and angry. So I’ll just raise a glass to you and say that you did the right thing, and you should not feel bad about it at all. And I’ll send wishes out into the universe that you won’t have to deal with that any more!
*sigh* sorry for all the typos in that.
Wil,
You don’t know me from a hole in the ground. I’m just a guy who watched you grow up acting and follow you on twitter and occassionaly read your blog. I go to conventions from time to time and occasionaly try to get some airtime with people like yourself.
I for one can’t speak for the rest of humanity, but I figure you’ve done a ton of things for everyone and have a talent and put it out there. For that I’m grateful and I would hope others would be respectful and the same. I feel bad when I hear this kind of thing in any circle because at some point, down the road, it may mean that great people like yourself have no option but to turn in, hire bodyguards, and be the elusive celeb that are rarely out there. You’re not that person, but I can see situations like this would drive anyone to such a conclusion. That is sad.
Again, I’m just one person so whatever that means to you, it means there’s one person out here that thinks that fans acting this way in unacceptable and you were completely in your right to act the way you did.
I hope this doesn’t come to the point where you’ll become inaccessible in the future. There are people out here that do respect your privacy and personal space. I hope one bad batch doesn’t ruin an open status that you’re currently demonstrating.
Thanks for sharing the experience with this reader and I’m glad your friends were there to help you out. Shame on those that provoked this.
Good Lord. I’m imagining someone separating you from the D, and I don’t think you’d have a problem with TMZ: There wouldn’t be enough of the person left for the paparazzi to verify there’d ever been a person there to begin with.
very scary. i was thinking how, in a situation like that, one of the mob could do something more dangerous than shoving a pen and something to sign in the person’s face.
Context is king. I don’t think there’s such a thing as an Always Yes or Always No. If you ever bump into a famous person somewhere public, and they are alone and don’t look like they are in a hurry, I recommend a friendly greeting that incorporates what you admire about them into it. Below, there was an example of saying hi to Nathan Fillion by nodding and saying “Captain.” This is a good method because it lets the person in question know you want to interact, but doesn’t put any pressure on them. The key is to have a greeting that easily segues into a conversation, but doesn’t demand a response. Like, if I met Wil outside of a convention, I might say “Hey, it’s Wil Wheaton, noted blogger, gamer, actor, geek!” and he could just smile and wave, or “Hey, it’s… what’s your name and what do you do?” if he is feeling particularly social.
(Believe it or not, a class on interacting with famous people was part of my training when I worked at Metreon!)
Wow, now that is some crazy behaviour! I can’t even begin to imagine what is going through their head to do something like that (or what it feels like to be on the receiving end). Tp treat someone like they are just a piece of meat for their entertainment, its just sick. Regardless of your past/current/future career choices. I doubt very much they’d enjoy people waiting hours outside wherever they are and trapping them, disallowing them to even leave. Just disgraceful.
And like you say, they aren’t true fans, just interested in someone famous. A true fan (of the non-crazy kind) would be sensible enough to show a bit of respect.
I think you acted very restrained towards them once you had been removed. And kudos for that!
I used to shoot for a music magazine back in the 90’s. Had a great time being allowed backstage to mix and mingle with the artists. I saw to a lesser degree what fans will do, what extremes they will go to meet an artist and get a photo or autograph.
Some feel that they “entitled” 24/7 access to favorite star. And if the star does not respond, they do what the lady did, threaten to put it out on the net that you were a jerk, did not want to sign, etc. etc. It is a fact that most of these people want the autograph to resell.
You did the right thing. You are not a jerk.