This isn’t one of those posts about not posting, except that it kind of is.
A couple of nights ago, Anne and I were sitting on the couch, Seamus between us, watching Modern Family. A fire in our fireplace warmed our living room, and both of our cats, who were stretched out in front of it.
Modern Family is one of my favorite shows on television, because it brilliantly fills a hole left by the Simpsons, when it stopped being about characters and started being about guest stars and whacky shenanigans: it’s a terrifically funny look at a family trying to be a family while their life happens around them. More often than not, it cleverly weaves together seemingly unrelated stories into a satisfying ending, and the writing is consistently clever and unexpected.
During a commercial, I thought about my kids, and my family. Ryan’s 25 and Nolan’s 23. We see them at least once a week for family dinner, but usually more than that. We’re a close family, we love each other very much, and every moment we spend together makes me so proud of all of us, because we struggled and suffered a lot for years at the petty and vindictive hands of their biological father. That we have anything at all is pretty remarkable, considering how relentlessly he tried to destroy our ability to be a family, and that we have something so special and rare makes all the suffering and struggling worth enduring, because here we are today, Team Wheaton.
I said this wasn’t one of those posts about not posting, except that it kind of is. During that commercial, as I thought about Ryan and Nolan and our lives together, I noticed that I don’t write about us as much as I used to, which means that I don’t write in my blog as much as I used to. More often than not, when one or both of them is over, I can take a picture and post it to Twitter, and it tells an entire story that would have once been saved for a blog post. Yes, I could still do that, and add the picture to the post, but that’s not the way we do things these days, and it feels like most people don’t read or comment on blogs, anyway.
So this isn’t a post about not posting, except that it is. It’s a post that reiterates, for me as much as anyone, that I need to write, because it’s doing the right thing, even when I feel like I don’t have anything to write about.
Runners run, even if they’re not in a race, and they run every day, so they’re ready for the race when they find themselves at the starting line.
Sometimes a nice jog, for the sake of jogging, can be a worthwhile thing. In fact, it’s worthwhile more often than not.
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It’s often the ‘little’ things that end up being most meaningful when we do them anyway, and being the ones we miss most when we neglect them. Lovely post 🙂
I like the blog posts, even en francais 🙂 Twitter and pictures are fine, but they are movies. The blog is the book, and books are and always will be better than movies.
Except if its about Lucy the puppeh, then we want the movie 🙂
A lovely reminder. Thank you 🙂
I still read and enjoy blogs, and now I have commented. Thanks for reminding me that writing just to write is a great way to ‘stay’ in shape 🙂
“Yes, I could still do that, and add the picture to the post, but that’s not the way we do things these days, and it feels like most people don’t read or comment on blogs, anyway.”
invalidates you
I love your blog. Especially posts like this. It’s vastly richer than twitter ever could be. There are a lot of us who read it, even if we don’t comment. I’ve had really bad days that have been rescued by a moment of quiet beauty from the Wheaton homestead, so thank you for that. And thank you for everything else you do to increase joy and decrease suffering. It matters.
🙂
And what happened, then?
Well, in Whoville they say – that the Grinch’s heart grew three sizes that day. And then – the true meaning of Christmas came through, and the Grinch found the strength of “ten” Grinches, plus two!
Modern Family is one of my most fav shows. lol agree .. Family is to me the most important thing in this world. Even with all the pain in the ass things they do. Drama drama. We take for granted that family unit you see. You assume they will be there forever and love you forever. But that is not the case you see. Blood mean’s nothing; its what you give to those around you. The love and devotion and patience. you see Mr. Wheaton i have been shunned by my entire family. Now that i am poor and can no longer help them; i and my writing is not tolerable any longer. No sob story here is what it is for many. So for me the holiday’s are what i can give and share; that is what makes this alone a tiny bit better. I READ YOUR POSTS Sir. ok ..enough of that ..GEEK ON .. lol lol
My eldest daughter is having trouble in Math at High School. We talked to her about getting more sleep, about not staying up so late. She said “But last thing at night is the only time I have to write., I have to write. Have to. Can’t get the ideas out of my head any other way.”
Is it wrong to want your sixteen year-old to drop Math so she can just write stories all damn day long?
This is so sweet! I’m sorry becoming and staying a family was tough but I’m glad for what you have!
I love this.”Runners run, even if they’re not in a race, and they run every day, so they’re ready for the race when they find themselves at the starting line.” That is SUCH a perfect analogy for writing.
My situation is very different from yours. I was an actor, but anything I ever appeared in was canned pretty early.
I chose to write a blog, well it’s a Tumblr, (so almost but not quite the same thing), because a few years ago I found that I had to quit work to look after my mother. The blog was a way of me holding onto my sanity while I’m a 24 hour live-in carer. I don’t get out much any more, due to my duties, and the blog was something to do to keep me focused and stop me going nuts.
The blog’s original focus was astronomy, and it gained 120,000 followers, but I got a bit bored with that after a failed attempt at creating an astronomy pod cast with an astronomy society. So I kind of took a leaf out of your book and just started posting about my self and what I do, which is now making video games. I was actually quite surprised how many people were interested in hearing about the daily life of some nobody from the UK.
Anyway, the point I’m trying to make (sorry, went off on a tangent) is that I feel that I have to post something most days. If I can’t think of something to post, because I’m having a dull day, I throw up a video or an image or something to let people know I’m still there. I feel I have to post something because I feel that I’m letting the side down if I don’t.
I actually make it a part of my weekly work time regiment to stop by your site and see if there is something new. I like reading most of your blog entries, especially about the old days on TNG and stuff about beer…I don’t comment often because I feel like you’ve probably got a ton of folks that comment and many of whom are doing it just to say they did…I don’t want to be that guy so I just read, enjoy and move on…maybe an occasional “thanks for blogging” might be a good idea…just as a general rule, and not specific to your blog but just a thanks for sharing kind of thing…I like it…going to start doing that more often, telling people thanks for sharing, and meaning it…
hi wil how are you
I enjoy and love all your post. Thank you for sharing your gift of writing. I personal have a hard time with writing. Again, thanks.
It’s not often I read blogs anymore but I do always find myself coming back to yours.
Yeah, I like your blog too. I read it regularly but don’t comment often. I don’t follow the other forms of social media because it makes me feel too much like a fan girl pretending to be friends with celebs and I quite frankly don’t need another outlet for my procrastination. So I keep my eye on your blog and take a few minutes out of my day when I see you have posted something. This one was particularly pleasant. And yesterday! I am so totally in love with the NJN.
In an age of “don’t read the comments” I don’t often think about writing a comment. I do read your blog through feedly so I am rarely actually here and able to comment. I appreciate what you, and your family, have done for my family. Thank you.
This is one of the few places reading the comments is uplifting rather than rage-inducing or just sad. I don’t always read the comments, and even less often add my own 2¢, but when I do, it’s worth it.
A photo on Twitter is just a quip, a snippet, a remark. A blog post is a conversation, a story, a message.
I find Twitter to be a terrible place to keep in touch, even if it is the way things are done now. It’s time-locked nature means you only see what people say if you are online at exactly the same time. It’s like listening to a CB radio, or trying to have a discussion at a loud cocktail party. A well-written blog post is something I can read slowly, and savor.
I for one very much miss your first person narrative “slice of life” posts.
Hi 🙂 Great article as always ! But unfortunately the title should be spelled : “ceci n’est pas un blog”
(Sorry to correct you. But hey, after you change it people will stop telling you you’ve made a mistake !)
Reading ‘Just a Geek’ for the first time recently led me to your blog. I really enjoy reading it and got me to finally start the blog I always meant to start. It’s a shitty blog but, it’s always cathartic to get your thoughts out, and if people want to read them that’s GREAT (even better if they ever entertain people!).
I hope you and other bloggers don’t only post to receive comments. I hardly ever post a comment, but I love reading what you post, and what others in your community of commenters have to say.
I’ve tried Twitter and used it for a while to talk to a small group of people. Your is one of the few celebrity feeds I followed. But I’ve stopped looking at Twitter. Stopped looking at Facebook. Never been a photo taker so I’ve never even made an Instagram account.
I’m not saying people are somehow wrong to use these quick forms of communication, but I guess the written word in longer form just works better for me. If you keep writing I’ll keep reading.
Your running analogy is spot on. Writers need to write no matter what. Keep exercising the muscle or risk it breaking down. I say that as someone who used to write essays, poetry and blogs quite prolifically. One day I’ll make the time to get back to it. But it is much harder to do that once you’ve let your practice lapse. Much like Yoga!
Yours is one of the very few person blogs that I look forward to reading. And it is the Only celebrity blog I read at all. Your blog is honest, thoughtful and well written. It is about the little things in life, whether that includes your work or your family. It is actually about YOU and your life experiences and not some PR person’s idea of what people would want to read about you. I appreciate that. I appreciate you as a person because of your writing.
This was a good “not” blog; I really need to do those things too. I hope you write more, because I am very selfish and I really like reading what you write… 🙂
As a runner I appreciate the analogy to running. Spot on there.
As someone who also wishes I would write on my blog more, I feel your pain. I used to write much more, but find that I’m on FB more often now, despite not really every writing anything profound there.
I read, but I feel like to comment on a blog that’s not someone I know is just a little bit… I don’t know, intrusive, fangirl-y somehow, even when the blog I’m reading ISN’T someone famous. So I generally don’t. But your writing is always meaningful, and I’m always happy when I see you’ve posted something. And now I feel badly that I haven’t let you know that before. Your work is appreciated.
It is frustrating when you write or blog and… nothing. No comments, reviews, or even just likes despite knowing people read it. It can make you feel like there’s not much point to writing at all if no one cares, but the only other choice is to do nothing at all. What fun is that?
Clever title, Wil. The actual Magritte is in just about in your backyard. Inspired by a recent visit? Something else to blog for another day! 🙂
you’re pretty great, Wheaton. You and your whole family.
These two excerpts are spot on for me:
“I’ve had really bad days that have been rescued by a moment of quiet beauty from the Wheaton homestead,” ‘A moment of quiet beauty’ really spoke to me.
“A photo on Twitter is just a quip, a snippet, a remark. A blog post is a conversation, a story, a message.”
I love your posts and I’ll read whatever, whenever you write. I don’t often comment but that’s more due to lack of time (I read at work normally) not lack of interest. Plus, I hate repeating what others have already said; it feels like I’m copying them. But to be fair, I can have the same reaction; I’m just usually late so they posted OUR thoughts before I could. 🙂
I have read your blogs for years and I’m always entertained. I don’t often comment because like some of the others here I feel like you are too busy to get to read them all. It never occurred to me that you would think people weren’t reading your blog if they didn’t comment. If you keep writing I will keep reading.
I’ve never been much of a commenter, but I just wanted to say that I love your blog and especially posts like this. My husband and I are expecting our first child and I look to your family as a model for how I want us to end up.
i’m not much of a commenter (because i often have nothing interesting to say), but i’d like to say that i think it’s great that you get to see your children so often. i wish i had a dollar for every time i heard a parent complain that they don’t even get a [i]phone call[/i] from their children once a week.
I love the duchamp reference.
I love how much you love your kids.
We have 4 kids, a boy, 2 girls and another boy. I only gave birth to one and only got to raise/am still raising the youngest 3 – my girls were 4 & 6 when I came into their lives – but I love them all regardless of whether they came from my body or not. (Our eldest son and his beautiful wife have now given us our first Grandy, with another on the way YAY!!). I don’t think biology matters as much as love and understanding does in the long run.
I take my hat off to you Sir. And to Anne, and to Ryan and Nolan, as it takes a lot of effort on everyone’s part to make it work. It’s not easy being a Step, especially if the (other) Bio parent is a less-than-stellar individual. But with hard work and lots of love and support for one another, it is possible to have a fantastic relationship with your Steps. 17 years down the track and I can finally say that now 😀
And, I’ve got to say, I love how much the youngest three have grown up to mirror certain facets of my personality and interests. (I always say, they are my bio’s but I wasn’t old enough to give birth to them so their Mum did it for me). My eldest daughter is a huge bookworm, my youngest daughter has a love of TT games and my baby boy is all about video games. Achievement Unlocked: Complete set of Nerdy Kids!
What happened with their bio father? Do they have any relationship with him now? He sounds like he was really mean. Did he have mental health issues or drug issues?
I suppose I rarely comment, but I still like reading blogs better than any other kind of social media.
And this is a comment about not commenting…I read your blog and enjoy it, even when I don’t comment. 🙂
Like so many others, I never comment on blog posts, for reasons like because I’m shy, or others have already said what I wanted to say (like almost everyone else on this post) or because the internet can be a scary place to post things sometimes (especially when English isn’t my mother tongue so I will make mistakes when writing…) … BUT I do read all of your posts, and they always make my days much better, Thank you for posting, and for being so honest when you do. And thank you for the non judgemental ninja. 🙂
Well, one data point, here: your blog is one of my “start-up” tabs in Firefox. And I refuse to do Twitter or Facebook.
So your blog is my only way of getting your charming pics, etc.
FWIW.
–GG
So much this. I find Twitter fun and useful for telling entire stories quickly and easily. So much so that I forget to write, and I should write. I do not identify as a runner, but I run, so if I do identify as a writer a writer, I should write, right?
Thanks for the reminder, Wil. Loved the last line.
Blogs are a way for people like me to connect with those we admire based on their work on the internet, television, books, life, etc. It gives us a peek into their (mostly normal) lives and at least for me, gives hope that maybe someday we can achieve things that will make others follow US. I read your blog, Pat Rothfuss, Neil Gaiman and a few others because I love their success, but even more I respect what they have done, who they are, and what they do.
I know you are very busy producing, writing, and living, but the five minutes you took to write this blog does make a difference. Thank you for sharing pieces of your life with us…especially when it is an important topic like family, depression, etc. Knowing that others struggle and succeed gives us all hope that we can overcome as well.
It’s the same reason I draw when I get a chance. I don’t sell my art, but I love the experience of creating. Plus, it’s always an inexpensive yet meaningful gift when I do a drawing for someone. I don’t want my skills to get rusty.
I hear ya. I’d let my blog drift away from me but all of the NaNoWriMo talk made me think to myself, hey self, you may not have the time or inclination to write a novel, but you can challenge yourself to write a blog post every day of November. It wasn’t great or anything but I enjoyed it and while I’m not posting every day anymore, I’m definitely back in the habit and it feels good.
Glad to see you are as well.
I do enjoy the odd “from the heart” post that echoes what’s going on in your/my/the writer’s brain at the time. It’s a lovely window into their (or other iteration, as above!) life and soul. Thanks for sharing! X
I’m glad you still write, that it’s not always that Twitter pic that says it all that gets posted instead. A picture may be worth a thousand words but give me a book over a photo nearly any day.
I don’t do twitter, and I love blogs for their more in-depth take on life, though yours and Epbot’s are the only two ‘geeky’ ones I follow. I mostly read ones about sheep, horses, dogs, druidry, writing and crochet. 😀 I read the comments here often because they educate and uplift me just as your posts do.
NaNoWriMo has got me back into the swing of writing again, so I’m now sticking to a daily word count of 1000 which is quite manageable on a long term basis. I write novels not blog posts, but oh boy am i happy when those worlds and characters are rolling along! If it’s what you’re meant to do you just have to do it!
Ps. I miss your family posts. 🙂
I once met Ray Bradbury at a book signing, and his one piece of advice to me as a very young aspiring writer was, “Write every day.” Because, as you said, runners run every day. Even when they don’t have a big race coming up. Even when they don’t feel like it. Just because it’s a skill that needs to be practiced.
Also, even though posting a picture on Twitter may elicit more comments and retweets and whatever, it doesn’t seem to initiate genuine conversations very often. Whereas thoughtful writing invites the reader to have a dialogue with the author, even if sometimes it takes place only in the reader’s head and not online ;).
I’m a new follower of your blog, after seeing you on the Guild and listening to Ready Player One. If your blog didn’t exist, I probably would never have tuned in to your Twitter feed or other media forms. I wouldn’t have known anything about the person behind the celebrity name.
Your blog is a window into who you are, how you think, and why we should follow your other projects. It showed me that you have important and interesting things to say, and that my life can be enriched by spending my time listening to you.
I do tend to “lurk,” as it never occurred to me that you would read the comments! And if you did, I wouldn’t want to seem like another fan-girl stalker…
Please keep writing. I’ll keep reading. I’ll even start commenting.