205 thoughts on “i’d love to change the world but i don’t know what to do”

1. I don’t think it’s just you, Wil. At least one local news outlet (here in Portland OR) turned off comments permanently this week because the vitriol there has gotten so out of hand. By sending screenshots to advertisers, showing unmoderated hate speech in comment sections, one group is hoping to pressure all the other news outlets to follow suit.

   You know it’s bad when we Stumptown lefties and bicyclists are begging for some version of censorship in the name of civility.

2. Wil, you raise some very important questions. I have also been wondering this very thing, and worry that the current generation of children is being negatively influenced by having access to such potentially toxic online communities from such an early age.

   I wonder if part of the problem is that full cognitive empathy doesn’t actually start to completely develop until a child is about 13 yrs, and can take up to 7 yrs after that to finish developing [as seen in the Wall Street Journal article – http://on.wsj.com/1zcRxvp%5D. And, these days, kids are online so much during those ages (13yrs – 21yrs), that they are continually exposed to each other’s potentially very unempathetic behaviours and interactions – perhaps creating a vicious cycle of, as you said, “cruelty and bigotry and mysogyny.”

   This may be different from older generations, because having constant access to online communities at such a young age is still such a new phenomenon. (I’m only 28, but I still remember as a kid getting access to only about a 1/2 hour of dial-up internet a day (if I was lucky), where I could maybe send a couple of emails via Hotmail to my friends).

   On the plus side, a number of studies (found on the American Psychological Association website) have shown that frequent use of social networks such as Facebook CAN have a positive affect on the development of empathy in teenagers – particularly in online interactions. But I assume that depends on what kind of interactions they are witnessing and participating in on a daily basis.

   So, I guess all we have to do is take back the forums and the social media sites, and be positive examples for the world’s next generation of children/teens, to show what it means to interact online in a fun and respectful manner. That won’t be hard at all…

3. There’s a lot more stress in world IIRL, which makes people act out. But yeah, there’s a whole load of teenagers grown up with the notion that it’s ok to act like dicks online. I haven’t seen the latest stats, but there’s more cyber-bullying in last couple of years just for a start… and that kind of vileness forms it’s own kind of feedback loop as it’s accepted as ‘normal’…

   I dunno… maybe it’s time to start being selective what where you go online. or stop reading comments in some forums. I wonder if usenet’s still working, and if all the trolls and idiots have forgotten about it yet.

4. Unfortunately, too many do not see any value in making people be responsible for the consequences of their actions. Our beloved freedoms of speech, religion, etc. are too often used as license to be a judgmental @$$hole. I pray that someday soon we will, as a people, wake up and realize that being a jerk is the point where our “rights” go way farther than the Founding Fathers ever intended.

   Hang in there, Wil. As the only sentence that is ALWAYS true states, “This, too, shall pass.” After all, you’ve made basic courtesy a topic of conversation, and on the web no less! Maybe there’s hope after all.

5. I’m on the same ‘get off my yard’ corner with you, Wil. Because of the ‘gigantic douchewagon’ mentality I’ve encountered in online gaming, I’ve actually uninstalled my favorite game to get away from it. We’re just about the same age, you and I, (albeit, I don’t have kids because of ‘reasons’), and I suspect that Milennials have reached the point in their existence where they finally understand the definition of their generation’s label. (The Me Me Me generation, as Time magazine put it). In addition, people feel too much anonymity behind the keyboard. You’d think that with access to 104 keys, they’d find a way to format something nice to say. Who am I kidding….

6. I don’t want to say it’s all about the feeling of entitlement. I think the instant society that began when you and I were kids…the microwave, the cool computer games that our parents never had…everyone telling us how great we have it…I feel like that was the beginning of it. As we grew up and had our own kids, and told them many of the same things, we could not ground it to walking uphill to school 40 miles in the snow every day…because it was never that bad. As a result, the kids get the sense that its not supposed to be that bad, and when bad news comes along, they have nothing but contempt. It is no longer a battle to overcome or a goal to strive to achieve…it is how dare you get in the way of my “success” (read: fun). But there is another piece, isn’t there? Respect for others. Where does that come from? It must be taught. Are teachers responsible for this? How about daycare providers? Gotta be the parents, and if the kids only see them at the beginning and the end of the day, what are they learning the rest of the time. Last straw? The fact that you can say anything you want online and don’t have to look someone in the eye. “Warning, gonads are MUCH larger online than face-to-face”. I wonder what all that practice online will ultimately lead to….maybe I don’t want to know.

7. Although many of us can’t change the whole world, we can make the part we interact with much better which I think you have already done. For example, go watch the commentary on the VERY last Eureka episode, the Series Finale. The Writers and Producers talk about how great it was to work with you and Felicia Day. Not just once but like 3/4 times they brought up how great it was to work with you and your friend Felicia. I didn’t ever recognize you with a beard the first time I was watching Eureka (and in fact stopped watching sometime around Season 4 before Felicia showed up).

   Not saying you need any reassurance of how you conduct yourself, but the commentary shows the positive energy you are able to project to others. Should be an example to all others … LLAP 😉

   P.S. Please consider coming to http://www.shore-leave.com or http://www.farpointcon.com/ sometime! I think Felicia came to FarPoint about 5 years ago (in the cold and snowy month of Feb)

8. I think social media is what ruined the Internet. People used to be able to be anonymous if they wanted to. No more, now every single thing you do is tracked,.It’s incredibly easy to track someone down IRL and dox them or otherwise ruin their life. If you make one fuckup, everyone on the planet knows about it with one click. I truly believe that pretty soon women are going to get murdered by their online attackers at the rate this is going.

   No idea how one fixes this though. I think the misogyny has always been around, now it’s just very, very easy to spread and share it to the world.

9. I’m not sure that the cause is rooted so much in consequence-free anonymity or in lack of empathy (though the latter is certainly a result) as in the mechanics of competing ideas in a mass communication world. The problem didn’t originate with social media (just look at the talking heads on talk radio), but it reaches it’s most toxic form there.

   What we have is an environment where every opinion, from the most reasoned to the most ignorant, from a 9 year old or a 99 year old starts out on an equal footing in the competition for an audience. And the ideas that win aren’t usually the best, just the loudest – the most hyperbolic, the most outraged, the most inflammatory, the most fearful. Enough people don’t bother (or don’t know how to seek out) evidence or reason to overcome the shouting.

   Once it gets started, the situation is self-perpetuating, with voices on one side screaming ever louder to drown out the increasing screams on the other. It’s bad enough for adults (I know my share of ignorant screamers more than old enough to know better), but for immature, hormonal teenagers, who have spent enough time in this environment to be trained to evaluate ideas by emotion and communicate in an outraged shout, it’s pure poison.

   I don’t tend to think of young, angry online screamers so much as cruel, cowardly bullies – just very shallow thinkers.

10. Hi Wil, It’s really not hard to understand why everything is going to hell. It’s that FRAUD in the White House. He’s now pushing his full agenda to put the final nail in the coffin of the USA. That has always been his plan, but he knew he had to wait until the end of his second term to execute the really horrific part of his game plan. The vast majority of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck. I see really great looking younger people pushing their GoFundMe.com links on Twitter and every social media. Most people are broke. They can’t get a job, then they watch a few minutes of the news. They see that the FBI says there are terrorists are in all 50 states. If you are listening to the right news broadcasts, you hear from retired Generals who talk to their contacts in the Pentagon that although Barry Soetoro a/k/a Obama talks a good game about taking out terrorists, we are only running 7 – 10 bombing runs a day in the Middle East, when we are capable of running over 1,000 – daily! Everyone is at each other’s throats and most don’t understand why. The dying American dream will soon be lost forever. How is it that a Kenyan born FRAUD has managed to stay in office seven years when all the hard evidence shows he’s not an American citizen, in-fact he is a Muslim terrorist. Something very big is on the horizon right now with the ‘Jade Helm 15’ military exercises in 10 states. Reports show that they are fast spreading to other states, starting a full month early. Do you have any idea what I am talking about? Five (5) Walmarts in 5 states have closed and have been gutted in preparation for use by the military. In-fact the military has taken control of all five and they are building razor ribbon fences, pouring reinforced concrete on the floors to handle heavy military equipment and they are installing handcuffs around the interior perimeter of every facility. This is to restrain both terrorists and American dissidents (people who resist the actions of the military) as a staging area before they are shipped off to FEMA camps. This is not fantasy or a conspiracy theory, it is happening right now. And there is photo and video evidence to support all of this. People don’t know what to think. I live in Las Vegas and I have noticed that the stores seem empty at all hours of the day and night. A 6th Walmart here is undergoing the conversion process right now. Restaurants are offering the deepest discounts trying to lure locals in. I’m not talking about the strip, I’m referencing the suburbs, And the levels of violent crime in the suburbs of Las Vegas and many other cities have risen dramatically. This is just the beginning. It all promises to culminate in October with the global currency reset which will drop the value of the US dollar 40% on the first day. This is being effected by the IMF – International Monetary Fund. 205 countries have agreed to it, excluding the USA. Obama is counting on this which is supposed to happen at the conclusion of the Jade Helm 15 military exercises. I guess we will soon see. But I think that the primary answer to your question as to why everything seems to be running off the rails is that most people are broke, prices continue to rise and 70% of California will have no water in about one year. Don’t you find it amazing that neither the State of California government nor the federal government is taking emergency actions to prepare for this event? California did commit last week to spend $1 billion on settling more illegal aliens. Why? There is an answer as to why, but I am not going to say it here except to say if you are interested Google: ‘Bilderberg Group’ of which the most visible people in the world make up its membership. Look for their global mission statement and you will see exactly what I am talking about. Then look at statements made by Bill Gates in the past week, who is one of the most active members of the Bilderberg Group. Up until the past week, I have been sending emails, faxes and I have been calling leading members of Congress to demand action and impeachment of this FRAUD in the White House. Now I see that what is about to unfold is the only answer to save our Constitutional Republic. If Americans think our country is worth saving, when megalomaniac Obama makes his move, Americans will descend on Washington to drag all of these frauds out of the White House and Congress. It is past time we take back our country from the politicians who couldn’t care less about any off us, they are just there to make money trading on insider information which for them, is totally legal.

    Here are summary articles on ‘Jade Helm 15’. There are hundreds of articles. Just Google: ‘Jade Helm 15’

    For anyone who has the means, I suggest that you make arrangements to leave this country when all of this explodes later this year. New Zealand is the optimal choice.

    https://www.intellihub.com/confirmed-military-vehicles-are-being-shipped-to-a-closed-texas-walmart-ahead-of-jade-helm-photos/

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/04/29/jade-helm-15-a-military-simulation-draws-scrutiny-and-wild-speculation-in-texas/

    http://www.dcclothesline.com/2015/03/19/the-jade-helm-15-drill-is-a-martial-law-civial-war-and-red-list-extraction-drill-2/

    http://www.dcclothesline.com/2015/04/07/phase-two-of-jade-helm-15-is-emerging-3/

    http://www.dcclothesline.com/2015/04/18/jade-helm-is-designed-to-take-america-directly-into-world-war-iii/

11. Zod help me, but I’m going to play pop sociologist here (and finally put one of those undergraduate degrees to use).

    First, I do think there’s an element of Eternal September (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eternal_September) here, on two levels. First, yes, the kids are out of school and posting online in their now copious free time, so there a seasonal uptick in immature web presences.

    But, perhaps more tellingly, more and more people are able to get online these days. It’s not just the upper and upper-middle classes with broadband and smartphones; web access gets cheaper and more ubiquitous all the time, and the age of first-Internet activity keeps getting younger. One in six human being on planet earth has a Facebook page, and that includes the a lot more of the innately trollish than those of us who has web access in the early 2000s were used to encountering.

    The whole world is coming online to play now: young and old, rich and poor, intellectual curious and anti-intellectually trollish. It’s not our safe haven.

    (This, by the by, is why so many new and ephemeral social networking/photo/chat apps pop up and die in such quick cycle now. The first time social networkers (teens) keep trying to carve out a sub-community that’s all their own, then it gets opened to the larger world and Yogi Berra’s famous “no one goes there anymore; it’s too crowded” paradigm kills the zeitgeist and the next shiny app bauble starts stealing mindshare.)

    Now, combine this with the network effect, where like-minded folks can connect and amplify each other, even when they are physically quite distant and statistically a minority, and the trolls suddenly can seem louder online than they are in real life. In meatspace, I have to actually be within earshot of the rare unashamed racist jackwagon when he/she is feeling mouthy in order to encounter trolling.

    Online, this jerkwad can airdrop into any conversation and inject hate with a minimum of physical effort and, even more empowering, the shield of anonymity. This is the promise of the web in the hands of lunchroom bully. It’s the tax of giving online communities to every human community, not just the curious nerds who built them.

    As Gibson said, the street finds it’s own uses for things, and in my experience the street is often an asshole.

12. I’ve found in my truly ancient life online that I need to focus on / create communities where folks respect themselves and each other and simply move out of and/or away from the ones that don’t. Fools will always find other fools with whom to collect and linger. But so too will people who are actively working to make the world a better place. The trick is to not kid yourself that you can wade into a cesspool of morons and turn it into Eden.

    People who enjoy being nasty aren’t open to being corrected, and by trying to change them we only get sucked down closer to their level. Better to create and support places where mutually respectful people can, do and will continue to build better and better things. Eventually, some of the riffraff will wake up to how much their pool stinks and move on. Some of them will get sucked down into the bottom of it and some will just endlessly circle the bowl. it won’t be for lack of better places they could have gone or lack of off ramps from their dark patterns.

    Light casts shadows, and some people move toward the light, some into the shadows. That’s what we humans do with personal choice. As long as you’re building and supporting places of light, you are making the world a better place. But folks won’t move out of the shadowy cesspools of life until they are fed up with them from their own experience and begin to look for alternatives. And at any given moment, some folks just aren’t ready to look for something better. That’s not on us. What is on us is to not let their behavior somehow convince us that what we’re doing is a lost cause. It isn’t. But I know there are days it seems that way.

13. One thing I’ve seen other people mention but which is probably a good thing to re-iterate here – we are living in the Wild Wild West of the Internet. Remember what kids got up to back in the day of the wild west?

    Wild is probably the best way to look at it. We have had access to the internet for a little over a generation, and access to the world wide web for less than that. If you compare the internet to the wild west you will see that, just like back then, there will be people who will take extreme advantage of the lack of rules in the internet. And it will be up to the people who want to live a good life to ante up, stand up and fight back. We need to create social mores and expectations, and then find strength and courage to weather the storm of protest from those wankers who don’t want to play by the rules.

    And, if that doesn’t work, maybe hire a sheriff or two. 🙂

    Despite all the crap that’s flying around the ‘Net I’m sticking it out to enjoy the ride and see what people make of this new world of ours. I find the anticipation very exciting. I reckon, eventually, we will prevail and it’s going to be a heck of a place to live.

    But I also thank goodness for the delete, mute and block buttons.

    Keep on keeping on, everyone. 🙂

14. I don’t feel like it’s just online. All over the media, our government, there seems to be a haunting lack of empathy everywhere. Technology and online communities can be great. But they can also isolate us.

15. I think of how horrible we were as kids. the things we said and did, and now 17 years after I graduated high school, some of the people grew up and are genuinely remorseful, some of them realized they had a lot to lose if they continued to do the same shit, and some realized they didn’t have anything to lose by continuing to do the same shit. I’m not sure “kids today” are any worse than they have been in the past, but I do think we are seeing more of it as adults because a lot of the crap that kids do is done online now where more of us adults can see it.

16. Yesterday I commented on a Facebook comments thread for a post posted by a twentysomething friend of mine. I am 63, BTW. The topic was a particular inappropriate public behavior. About every other comment was some variation on punch the offender or beat the offender or karate-chop the offender in the throat or go ballistic on the offender. I wondered in a comment if anyone else thought that the number of comments referencing violent action was itself peculiar and unpleasant. I was told that I didn’t understand “modern” humor. Because I’m old. Those Kids™.

    See, I think that violent rhetoric is just one symptom of a growing tolerance for violence, especially violence as a solution. Making someone rage-quit a game is considered to be a viable strategy? I am I the only one who finds that appalling? Probably not, but if you say it is, you get hit with a dog-pile of virulent comments. When’s the last time you saw a media character solve a problem without resulting to violence? Doctor Who, maybe. But danged few other films or shows.

    Try to get through a night of network or cable television without a depiction of torture. Just try. Now they think it’s so “edgy” to have a woman torturing someone because that means she’s a Strong Woman Character. (Um, no. A SWC doesn’t have to be a badass, she just has to have agency.) Torture wasn’t a television and film good-guy trope until after 9/11. Watch a TV show or movie before that and it’s made very clear that torture is something the bad guys do.

    I made a little pledge to myself a few years ago that I wasn’t going to cuss online (and believe me, I can cuss–my generation normalized cussing) or call people names or belittle them, even if I really, really felt they deserved it. I even avoid snark. Goodness, it’s hard! But I figure if I want to live in a world with less violence and less violent speech, I have to be part of that world, not feed the violence I don’t want to live with. I have not regretted the decision.

17. I’m a teacher of both high school and middle school students in California, been teaching about 5 years now. I have never said this exact thing more often than this year. The teens are really starting to worry me, and it’s honestly not all their fault. As soon as I meet their parents, I get it. It’s learned behaviour, and it intensifies as they see it reflected in their peers. They are so used to being rewarded for every single thing that they won’t do any class work or activity unless it’s “for a grade.” They are so used to having everything immediately, that I will give an exam, and within a couple of hours receive emails asking why they aren’t in the online grade book yet. These kids are rude in their interactions with peers and adults, and when called out on it, they can’t identify that they did anything wrong. I’m getting more and more nervous for the future every year, and I haven’t even hit 30 yet…

18. You do realize you perpetuate this “Internet is a shitty place” by saying shitty things to people no matter how shitty you perceive them to be. Shit one of your blogs was going on a wild tangent about how GG is shitlords and how “anonymity is bad” because someone calls you a name, thus you should have the right to remove that anonymity from them.

    Wil, you’ve done as much shitslinging as most, and for you to claim some moral high ground that you’re upset the internet is a terrible place, you’re a huge fucking hypocrite. Just because you have some one sided, warped, and for the most part incredibly narrow minded view of certain things, doesn’t give you the right to then shit all over them, then cry when they say mean things back.

    TL;DR. You’re just as guilty as the rest of the internet. If you can dish it out but can’t take it, maybe leeching off of geek culture for a paycheck shouldn’t be your business.

    1. False.

       Or, technically, what we call a “false dichotomy.” There’s a world of difference between calling someone out for bad behavior and attacking someone just because of who they are, in terms of race, gender, or sexual orientation. There’s also a vast gulf between telling someone, “Hey, you’re acting like a shitbag. Knock it off.” and “I WILL RAEP N KILL U AND UR FAMILORZ!!!11!1one”

       If you can’t or won’t see the difference, I suspect you’re being deliberately obtuse.

19. Doing good means trying to be better and make the world better despite the assclowns.

20. It isn’t just online. The vast majority of kids today are just brats. I’m your age, Wil, and I’m disgusted by what I’m seeing. The other day I was driving down a side street near home and some kids were on skateboards in the street. Where once upon a time they would have moved over for a car to pass, now they deliberately spread out in the street and looked at me with total hatred and defiance on their faces. I had no clue who these brats were, but oh, how I wish I had a Bondmobile so I could have mowed them down and leave no trace! What has our world come to?

21. The frontal lobe of the human brain is responsible for empathy, and it doesn’t finish developing until as late as 25 years of age in some people.

    Kids literally haven’t fully developed the ability to be kind and compassionate yet. Did you know that children (as a population) rate as psychopaths when they’re young? And that rating goes down as they get older.

    So it’s not that they’re terrible people and the world is doomed — this is a normal quirk of human development. We’re selfish, impulsive, hurtful assholes when we’re little, and then we improve.

    It’s gonna be okay. The kids are alright. Irritating sometimes, but alright. 🙂

22. I’m younger than you, and I hate my generation and younger. Mostly the men/boys/manboys though. There are so many bright, strong young women out there, and they’re being dragged down by asshole douche canoes and mean-girl wannabes… the good is being suffocated by the trash.

23. I used to think that about in-person manners, too. Then I ventured onto the discussion boards and forums, and found that it was exponentially worse. The only thing we can do is teach our children that actions have consequences, that there are human beings on the other side of that computer screen with feelings, and that respect transcends age, gender, race, and all the other things. No one ever had a bad experience by being respectful. You can, however, have a horrible experience trying to be funny and crushing someone’s spirit.

24. It really can be disheartening to see how people, especially the younger generation, express themselves online. But you know what? At that age I thought and said some shitty stuff too. Only my audience was the handful of people who happened to be in my vicinity, not thousands of people online. I think we’re just seeing so much of the shittiness because it’s online where anyone can read it.

    That said, I do have faith that a good portion of them will mature and realize just how shitty they had been, and then make strides to not only be less shitty, but also show others how to be less shitty. It’s all part of growing up. It’s just that with the prevalence of posting online we get to see the early stages in all their horrific glory.

25. It’s everywhere right now and not age specific. I wrote a FB post just last week pleading with “people” to just follow the golden rule & keep their traps shut if they don’t have anything nice to say.
    Then I had to unfriend someone for playing the Hitler card when I was trying to have a conversation about Margaret Sanger.
    It’s exhausting when folks are deliberately ignorant and hateful.

26. Watch fox news if you want confermation it isn’t only the younger generation.

    But take heart, yes the cruel, the thoughtless and biggots are online. During this internet invasion there is a chance to find a way to communicate with then. Expose them to another side. The hard part is reaching them.
    Studies have shown the internet allows people to isolate themselves from opposing views. So while you are seeing them and they are reacting to you and issue you care about they are interacting with the opposing side. It is the best chance to reach them. And again studies show even being exposed to appossing views will modify even the most extreme views. It won’t make an extreme right a left visa versa but it will draw them closer toca middle road.

27. Someone I once knew had a theory about online dating that I think is relevant here. He said that at first – think, like, in the 90’s – online dating was actually kind of cool because it was a sort of self-selecting group that was even doing it in the first place, so if you were one of the people doing it, then you were probably going to be the same kind of weird that everyone else you’d find there was, so you were all set. But over time, the rest of the world joined in, and now it’s harder to spot the people who are all the right kind of weird.

    This may be the same kind of situation – people who didn’t use to go online at all are starting to, and are not used to what’s uncool to do.

    Or, this kind of thing has actually been happening all along, except it was more localized. One or the other of those, I’d wager.

28. 1) That’s one reason I call them ANTIsocial networks.
    2) I think the world has been headed this way since long before the internet became ubiquitous. These days the attitude is “I can say whatever I want, and IT’S YOUR CHOICE to be offended/hurt by it or not.” That is complete and utter bullshit, and we’re already reaping the fruits of that stupidity.
    3) Even in the best of times, anonymity encourages dicks to treat others like sh*t. That’s why I’m ambivalent about the idea of real names on the Internet. On one hand, there are times when anonymity is important and critically necessary, but on the other hand most of the time it is totally unnecessary and only results in unacceptable behavior.

    I wish I had an answer, but it’s a very difficult problem. I wish people would spend more time in actual social activity, face to face with flesh and blood, but I know the Internet isn’t going to ever be less mesmerizing. But there are good ways in which the Internet is breaking down the status quo as well. So I guess we just have to keep plugging away in our little corners of the planet and hope that the good and gentle voices eventually overrule the evil and roughshod ones.

29. Maybe dude, you just matured and grew up. People were jerks when I first hit the net and still are. Only reason it seems it’s exploded is there are more people having access to the ‘net than they did In 1994 for instance. Empathy has to be seen and experienced. So if these people aren’t emphatic online then they may Not be in person or haven’t a proper example. Just My theory mind could BE wrong.

30. There have always been latchkey kids with no one able or interested in teaching them basic social skills and, as you pointed out, human empathy. It’s only recently that they’ve had the tools to shout their personal ignorance to the world. And since the tool is so readily available, perhaps it falls on the rest of us to hone our selectivity skills and thicken our skins as a way of keeping that tool useful to us. Perhaps that is the price we pay for keeping the Internet chaotic and free.

31. It’s not you, I am sad to say. But put in the effort, for those who will understand, you have kids, you know how to filter through the shit….
    you know who spend your time on and who not to waste the effort…

32. More people have internet access via flatrate.

    I know it sounds weird but since AOL is in the news again because of an impending merger, you can find lots and lots of sources that the bulk of their revenue and earnings still comes from people going online via dialup.

    It’s a large country and the billions upon billions Comcast and Time Warner got for bringing affordable high speed internet to the masses mainly went to the large suburban areas. The EFF (and @reckless) are complaining endlessly how those subsidies didn’t get the job done and people are still living in the internet stone age.

    So with the masses getting better internet access, you’ll naturally see tons and tons more people online.

    Including school children

33. Thank you for posting this. I actually swore off chat rooms and message boards years ago, for essentially the same reason.

34. I am in the instructional technology field and one of the things I do is to teach college faculty how to use Twitter for their classes. One of the things I stress is this is a great opportunity to teach about digital citizenship. It is also a place to let these future employees and leaders know about the damage that can be done (either to others or themselves when it comes to looking for a job) by not being good Internet citizens.

    And, of course as you know, not all people are out there to be uncivil. If you haven’t heard of her, you should check out Trisha Prabhu, a mere teenager and Google Science Fair winner, who is developing code for social media sites to help deter cyber bullying. I have seen her speak and she is amazing. You can read about what she is doing here: http://bit.ly/1FDWmhr

    There is hope.

35. Mr. Wheaton I posted on my Facebook page today in response to the very same phenomenon. Thank you for posting your thoughts in your blog. You are right, it does seem that something has snapped. Been a fan of your work for a long time. Many of us out here really do like the way you think.

36. I’ve always had issues with anxiety and depression, and at 50 i’m just now coming to grips with the anxiety aspect thanks to you and Jenny and a few others I’m following online. Rest assured, you are making a positive difference in the world.

    I apologize in advance for rambling, but these are all things I want to say about what I see in the world today.

    For what it’s worth, I’m finding that Universal Health Care in a country that’s very proud of it isn’t nearly as universal as they like to think, and like the USA’s Social Security they’re finding ways to dismantle good things that were not even slightly broken when they started accusing it of that. Oh, and those social programs often aren’t altruistic anyway, they’re supported by selfish motivation.

    Every country in the world thinks it’s the best in one way or another, and they are all wrong and all right. We’re all human and there’s a lot of hypocrisy in the world. That said, I think that because of its history the USA is much quicker to air its dirty laundry, because it tries a little harder (with admittedly wildly varying levels of failure/success) to make itself better. I’m not saying it’s better, what I’m saying is that it makes itself an easier target. That, and trying to be the world’s protective bigger brother.

    One thing is unequivocally certain: there is a whole lot less direct governmentally-disseminated domestic propaganda in the USA than I’m seeing over here.

    The one gigantic flaw in the philosophy of the USA (but by no means limited to the USA – really I should say “mankind”) is the idea that “trickle-down” anything works. The old “if everybody looks out for #1, then competition blah blah blah will make everything better for everybody.” That’s an outright lie, and the truth is astoundingly obvious: if everybody put everybody else first, then nobody would be hungry or cold or marginalized, the world would be a much better place, and everybody who is capable of being happy, would be. And even those who aren’t capable would be dealt with much more intelligently and humanely.

    Just to be clear: competition is what makes littermates die of starvation. Competition wastes astronomical amounts of resources on lawsuits and failures due not to bad ideas but to too little support. Cooperation goes MUCH farther, faster and better than competition, without exception.

    I’m also finding everyday life to be much harsher in a country with strict gun control. People are much ruder and less empathetic even face-to-face. Not necessarily connected, but it’s a thought. Also, there are still lots of shootings, and people being beat and stabbed to death but taking longer to die. I’m really not convinced that’s better than being shot. And it’s all every bit as senseless.

    So I’m having a really tough time adjusting. But I’ve learned a few things. I don’t get caught up in online arguments any more (usually, and even when I do I bail out quickly) and I try to put my attention, effort and time into people and things that make my life better rather than tear me down. And I don’t remain silent when I see somebody trying to make somebody else’s life (or my life) miserable. I may not be able to make the world better, but I can make my little corner a little better. Everybody else will just have to take care of their own corner.

37. I was just thinking this morning how I can teach my son to be good and kind when the reinforcement he gets is that he will be forever stepped on when kind and rewarded for being an ass. I constantly reinforce doing the kind or forgiving things, but he sees no reason to, and my example hasn’t helped. I try to do the right thing and come out on bottom…

38. I think that things have gotten worse as phones have become more powerful. I mean, 15 years ago you could make calls, text and send a few emails on a phone and it cost a lot of money for minutes. You had to use an actual computer, which you might only have limited/supervised access to, to use most websites. Now, little kids have phones and those phones give them access to most of the web. And, the phones are often seen as disposable, and thus anything done with them as less important.

39. Perhaps it is your expectations. Tolerance is a two-way street. If you can’t tolerate those who believe different than you, don’t expect any tolerance from them.

40. What happened? Internet perceived anonymity combined with shifts in cultural paradigms away from honour and civility for one, but there is also the matter of “word rage” where people have an outlet for rapid-fire responses to things that offend them. Hotheadedness and snark existed as far back as recorded history (literally, you should see some of the early graffiti found in Rome and tablets in Egypt and how snarky some of the commentary was), but prior to the internet the most common public outlet was the editorial section of the paper. That required time and forethought so as to maintain some modicum of coherent literacy, which gave the person time to cool down. Now, with ten seconds to scream vitriol through one’s fingers and slam the “POST” button people can make complete asses of themselves without the time for reflection of previous ages.
    So, what to do about it?
    Honestly, if I figure that out I will probably be world famous and using numerous Nobel prizes as book ends. That being said, I do what I can by teaching the Old Ways to my daughters (Honour, Integrity, Responsibility, Valour, Wisdom, Piety, Family, Truth, and Moderation) as I was taught, try to live by example for those around me and maintain civility even when furious, and do what I can to counter the digital savagery in my own little ways here and there. It’s all we can do, to be honest- be the change you want to see, live your life as you would want others around you to live, and pray to the Gods and Ancestors that it catches on.

41. Have you not read Lord of the Flies?

42. Dear Wil. We are sensitive. Now part 2. Yes the youth of today have a ‘free’ attitude. There are no boundaries and no care. I was looking at bullying stats. It has increased and the funny thing is, everyone seem to be bullied. If you address an asshat about his or her behaviour you are ‘bullying’ them! Omg. The battle is lost. I for one do not interact on many of the usual spots due to this. Maybe we just grew up. Maybe there is hope in the few raised right. They always said give the kids a chance…

43. “it’s just exploded in a logarithmic curve”
    so, very, very slowly?

    (ok, that was an overly nerdy joke. I will see myself out)

44. Well, I don’t know whether it’s only kids but personally I’m finding that the world appears to be getting generally more ignorant and aggressive. It’s really scary. There are still so many amazing and positive people around that give me faith in humanity but the scary people seem to be getting scarier and nastier.

    Kids certainly don’t seem to have as much respect as they used to. I’m hoping that positivity and kindness will win out in the long run.

45. You cannot dive into a lake without making a ripple. So it is too with being in the world. We each of us change it every day. And it changes us in return. The trick I think is to make both changes as positive as possible.

    I have found for myself that the key is in selectivity. As regards the ways in which I change the world, I try as best I can to be selective in what I say and the way I say it. As regards the ways in which the world changes me, I try as best I can to be selective in what I read and view, and in who and what I let matter to me.

    It has taken me a very long time to learn that not every unpleasant rude person requires my engagement. These days when I encounter toxicity I generally do my best to simply note it, and if I have something meaningful and constructive to say I say it, and if I don’t I don’t, and then I simply move my focus away from the toxicity and place it upon something more positive.

46. Wil, I read about that incident you referred to in the school and I was appalled also. Being a father of 3, I cannot understand how people can treat children in such a way. I also completely agree with your observations of the behavior of people on the internet. I too have stopped frequenting forums I’ve been a part of for nearly 15 years for the same reasons.

47. Um, Wil? usenet? It has always been like that. Just blank it out everyone, the assholes will dump their shit and keep doing it. That is what they’re made to do. No amount of education or level or responsibility will change that. Once they try it in real life, the education that they need will happen.

48. The thing is – and it personally took me a long time to realise this – it’s not your job to change the world.

    It’s not even your job to change everyone you know.

    The world has given you resources not available to most people. You probably feel guilty that you’re not doing more with them.

    Word to the wise: Not even Jesus managed to save everyone. He didn’t manage to solve poverty, greed, violence or evil, either.

    And you’re no Jesus, Wil Wheaton.

    Instead – just continue to be the best version of you that you can be.

    There will be days when you’re going to screw up – because you’re human, and that’s what we do.

    But there will also be days when you’ll say or do something that’ll change someone else’s life permanently for the better.

    You may not be able to change the entire world, but you can definitely change a person’s entire world.

    Day by day, one life at a time.

    Keep standing up for those who need your voice to be heard.

    Because every single person whose life you help to make better counts.

49. As an American, I was raised with the awareness of having Free Speech. Except, I really didn’t have it. I wasn’t allowed to call people names, comment on their appearance in a negative way, make fun of them, their race or religion, use profanity or vulgar language. Free Speech was never meant to equal the definition of bad manners. I know I am fortunate to live in a country where I can speak up. But, there are consequences for how I do it. It seems there are no consequences any longer.

    1. I think the biggest problem is that people just don’t have manners anymore. They think that not having them (or having bad manners) is part of their “Free Speech”.

       If people would listen to Wil and his mantra of “Don’t be a dick”, the world would be a much better place. =)

50. The larger the “community,” the less the accountability from anyone. I think the decline is coming from just that. If we don’t know or care about our neighbors, why should someone you’ve probably never met matter. 🙁 I’ve noticed the same, multigenerationally, in my office and other dealings. 🙁

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