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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

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WIL WHEATON dot NET
WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

take me anywhere i don’t care

Posted on 10 January, 2023 By Wil

It is 1987. The movie sold out, and there is no way we are going home early. There aren’t many places for us to go, and we only have like ten bucks, each, so this is where we end up.

I mean, not here, specifically, but if you are already smelling the old coffee, the smoking section, the rancid grease, and maybe I think that’s pie crust from this morning? You know what I’m talking about. You’ll find one in every town, you’ll see.

Bless all the servers who endured a table of teenage nerds who bought a single plate of fries to share and got refills of soda for three hours, tipped like shit because they didn’t know any better, and loudly argued about comic book characters when they weren’t even more loudly quoting Monty Python. We didn’t know how much we would come to retroactively appreciate you, and the safe place you were part of.

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Comments (8)

  1. wabbit89 says:
    10 January, 2023 at 5:16 pm

    For us, it as a local IHOP. And we used to order the chicken breast strips basket. Yes, it was worded like that on the menu. So… “hey, you ever seen a chicken breast strip?” was the funniest question ever. Sigh. Thanks, IHOP staff people.

  2. Jim Jarrett says:
    10 January, 2023 at 5:24 pm

    Amen. Perkins in Bradford, PA. 1985-1987.

  3. Ginny says:
    10 January, 2023 at 11:45 pm

    For me it was Hoot’s at 2am in Eugene, OR in the late 70s. Those poor wait people (all older ladies) put up with our stupid drunk jokes. And they always demonstrated HOW BIG THE GIANT WAFFLE WAS, by measuring a giant waffle in the air, right in front of their bosoms.

    Out of a sense of shared guilt, we females usually ordered the waffle plate after snickering like sycophants at the guys’ jokes.

  4. Sean Kilpatrick says:
    11 January, 2023 at 4:53 am

    Alex’s Restaurant in Mt Pleasant, SC… I prefer the rebuild since Hurricane Hugo washed away the decades of cigarette residue.

  5. ennKay says:
    11 January, 2023 at 7:18 am

    Colonial Inn, the only 24hr joint in my little town. Thank you Annette, we loved you <3

  6. halffastcyclingclub says:
    11 January, 2023 at 8:28 am

    Another problem with your parents…My daughter used to hang out with friends at a local diner. They ate little but tipped well. They told me it was because I raised them right.

  7. Michael K says:
    11 January, 2023 at 11:13 am

    Our spot in Portland was called The Roxy. The servers were rude to everybody though, which was part of the charm. Your image reminds me of a Carrow’s, which is where we ended up when nobody had a car.

  8. Cat says:
    11 January, 2023 at 11:55 am

    Such vivid memories….

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