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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

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WIL WHEATON dot NET
WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

Author: Wil

Author, actor, producer. On a good day, I am charming as fuck.

breathe now, think sweet things

Posted on 11 May, 2005 By Wil

Nolan’s sick, so I’ve been too busy taking care of him to do much else this week. The good side is that we’ve gotten to watch a lot of Word Poker Tour DVDs together, but the bad side is I’ve lost almost all of the creative momentum that I created last week. Since my time and creative energy have suddenly become so limited, I probably won’t do much blogging this week.
If lack of content at WWdN creates some free time for you, I suggest spending that time outside. If you find yourself unable to go outside, because the Sun burns your skin and threatens to reveal to the world that you’re really a flesh-eating Zombie, stay indoors and visit . . .

  1. Tony Pierce. Tony’s one of the few bloggers who is consistently interesting, thought-provoking, and entertaining . . . often in the same post. Recently, Tony offered his review of the latest Weezer album, Make Believe:

    other than the cheesy single beverly hills, many of the tracks in the new record sound like typical post-pinkerton weezer: rivers singing little timid love songs of longing to girls who would probably do him if he just shut his damn mouth.

    He also writes beautifully weird little stories like

    balloon boy came from another town entirely. one where fences were made of crackers, trees were made a wood, and beer came right out of sky. the nerds had invented zero gravity luncheon meats but since the town was riddled with vegans the only way to sell any was to throw in a puppy and or a child.

  2. Gawker has a new site called Sploid, co-edited by Ken Layne, that’s earned a spot in my news reader

    Sploid is a news site with a tabloid mentality — top stories up top, played big, as fast as they break. If there’s a political line, it’s anarcho-capitalist: sniffing out hypocrisy and absurdity, whether from salon left or religious right.

  3. The Moderate Voice is a fantastic political blog, that is objective and intellectually honest. Unlike some of the so-called pundits out there who carry water for Dear Leader while they pretend to be something they’re not, you won’t find anyone, liberal or conservative, carrying water for anyone at TMV.
  4. Jessica Stover, blogging.la, and Nickerblog fill out Wil’s List Of Must-Read Blogs.

Anne and I packed about 1/3 of the Geek orders over the weekend. I’m teaching myself Scribus so I can build a cool little Chapbook out of Let Go. As soon as that’s done and printed, I’ll begin shipping.

mr. los angeles times: tear down this wall!

Posted on 9 May, 2005 By Wil

Hooray! From LA Observed, via blogging.la:

It’s official

it’s just a dream he keeps having . . .

Posted on 9 May, 2005 By Wil

Whether it’s a play, an improv show, a sketch comedy show, a sitcom, or even a multi-million dollar movie, there is always one moment when it comes together: all the self-consciousness, all the mental note-taking that is a vital part of the rehearsal process, and all the uncertainty about the quality of the show seems to magically evaporate. The actors settle into their roles, and the material flows through them and into the audience. We trade the work of rehearsing for the fun of performing.
Saturday night, we had that moment. ACME: A Day in the Life came together for the first time, and it was awesome. With rehearsals, previews, and the opening of our run a few weeks ago, I’ve done the show several times, and I’ve always felt happy with my performance . . . but this last show was the first performance where I had fun the whole time. I wasn’t watching myself, or gauging the audience, or wondering if one beat worked or missed. I just enjoyed the company of my friends, and had fun performing playing with them.
I noticed this feeling somewhere near the middle of the second act, and I told my friend Laura House, “I’m proud of the show, and I love the cast —”
“Yeah, we know,” she said. “We all read your blog, Wil.”
That sort of stopped me.
“Oh.” I couldn’t figure out if that was good or not, so I just continued. “Well, I love the cast, and I feel like we’ve been doing a good show, but tonight is the first time I’ve actually felt the same level of pure fun that I felt in Love Machine.”
Just then, Laura P. walked into the dressing room and announced that she was having all kinds of fun. “Does anyone else feel like that?” She said.
“You know, I was just telling House that —” The audience erupted into applause. I looked up at the monitor we use to see what’s happening on the stage, and realized that the sketch was over, and I was due on for “Roadtrip,” in about 5 seconds.
“Oh shit, I’m in this sketch!” I said, as I ran out of the dressing room. I made it onstage in 4.9 seconds, and nobody will ever know. Sweet.
After the show, a bunch of us went out for drinks, and we talked about how much fun we’re having. It was awesome, until Annie pointed out that there are only six performances left in this run. There is always the chance that we may extend, but it’s pretty unlikely for this show, because many people in the cast (including me) have other commitments that start as soon as the show closes.
I believe that this show is just as funny as Love Machine, and I know a lot of WWdN readers saw that show. So if you can take me at my word, come and see us if you can.

all the fallen leaves

Posted on 9 May, 2005 By Wil

The House of Representatives just passed an appropriations bill that provided more funding for the war in Iraq. Though I’ve never believed the war in Iraq was necessary or justified, and I saw through the lies the Bush administration told Congress, the American people, and the world, I’ve always felt that the soldiers in the field should have the absolute best weapons, armor, and support available.
Like George W. Bush, I’ve never seen combat. Unlike George W. Bush, I think supplying our military with the best armor and weapons, and taking care of our veterans and their families are two of the most important things a nation should do during a war ever. Period. Even more important than repealing the estate tax. Most Americans and some Congressmen agree with me, so appropriations bills like these are almost always quickly passed. Cynical, Evil, Totalitarian Congressmen like Jim Sensenbrenner know this, so they sneak things into these bills that have failed when they were brought up on their own.
Herr Sensenbrenner’s addition to this particular appropriations bill is a terrifying invasion of privacy: a national ID card.
If you’re even moderately concerned about privacy and security, you’re probably a regular reader of anything Bruce Schneier writes. If you’re not concerned with privacy and security, you should be, and you should read Bruce’s books, or at least his blog.
Today, Bruce breaks down the REAL ID act, and points out all the reasons it’s such a bad idea. But the thing that got my blood boiling is this:

[The REAL ID Act] was voted down last fall, but has been reintroduced and attached to legislation that funds military actions in Iraq. This is a “must-pass” piece of legislation, which means that there has been no debate on REAL ID. No hearings, no debates in committees, no debates on the floor. Nothing. [Emphasis mine]

I believe that this is national ID card is incredibly stupid, expensive, invasive, and unnecessary. But whether you think it’s a swell idea or not, ask yourself, “Do I want Congress passing laws that fundamentally change something as valuable as my right to privacy, without any discussion or debate at all?” If Congress is willing to force us all to submit to this invasion of privacy, without even allowing us to weigh in on it, how are they effectively representing us?
Does everyone understand what this means? The US Congress, the lawmakers who derive their power from the consent of the governed, are about to take a huge step toward turning our country into a police state, and they’re doing it without any debate at all. Democrats urged Nuclear Bill Frist to allow some debate on REAL ID, but he refused, it was cynically attached to the appropriations bill, and it easily passed the House. Why are Republicans in Congress shutting the American people out of the legislative process? Could it be because Americans overwhelmingly reject the idea of a national ID card?

When the Social Security Number (SSN) was created in 1936, it was meant to be used only as an account number associated with the administration of the Social Security system. Though use of the SSN has expanded considerably, it is not a universal identifier and efforts to make it one have been consistently rejected. In 1971, the Social Security Administration task force on the SSN rejected the extension of the Social Security Number to the status of an ID card. In 1973, the Health, Education and Welfare Secretary’s Advisory Committee on Automated Personal Data Systems concluded that a national identifier was not desirable. In 1976, the Federal Advisory Committee on False Identification rejected the idea of an identifier.
In 1977, the Carter Administration reiterated that the SSN was not to become an identifier, and in 1981 the Reagan Administration stated that it was “explicitly opposed” to the creation of a national ID card. The Clinton administration advocated a “Health Security Card” in 1993 and assured the public that the card, issued to every American, would have “full protection for privacy and confidentiality.” Still, the idea was rejected and the health security card was never created. In 1999 Congress repealed a controversial provision in the Illegal Immigration Reform and Immigrant Responsibility Act of 1996 which gave authorization to include Social Security Numbers on driver’s licenses.
In response to the tragic events of Sept. 11, 2001, there has been renewed interest in the creation of national ID cards. Soon after the attacks, Larry Ellison, head of California-based software company Oracle Corporation, called for the development of a national identification system and offered to donate the technology to make this possible. He proposed ID cards with embedded digitized thumbprints and photographs of all legal residents in the U.S. There was much public debate about the issue, and Congressional hearings were held. Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich testified that he “would not institute a national ID card because you do get into civil liberties issues.”

The leadership in this Congress is out of touch and out of control. They are beholden to an extremist minority, and they’re trying to force an extremist agenda on America.
Silencing the voice of the people on such an important issue sure doesn’t sound like a Democracy, or a Representative Republc. This sounds an awful lot like fascism.

for my two favorite moms . . .

Posted on 8 May, 2005 By Wil

Happy Mother’s Day, Mom. I wasn’t an easy kid to raise, but somehow you helped me turn out okay. Thank you for helping me make more wise choices than not. I love you!
Happy Mother’s Day, Anne. Your dedication to your children, your willingness to put what is best for them ahead of everything else in the world, and your singular focus on providing them the most opportunities and the best life possible, even when you didn’t get one iota of support from anyone else, — especially those who should most willingly provide it — is phenomenal. You are everything a mother should be. You are awesome. Thank you for letting me be your husband. I love you, Ryan and Nolan’s mommy. 🙂

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