Category Archives: blog

Meeting Michael Moore

When I was 18, I really wanted to go to college. I wanted to go because I have always loved to learn, even if I’ve never fit in particularly well in the academic environment, and I truly believe that the more knowledge you have, the more options you have in your life.
I mean, how many guys do you know who are college educated, who get a different job in sales every 6 months?
It’s all about knowledge and options, man.
The only problem is, I never, uh…well, I never took the SAT. I took the PSAT, and did pretty well. If I recall correctly, my results said that “96% of people who take this test will score lower than you” on the verbal section (yes, there was a time when I could spell correctly and even use correct grammar. Of.) but on the math section, it said something like, “You will only score higher than Anna Nicole Smith. Do yourself a favor and find some rich old dude to marry, then wait for him to die and take all his money, because you’re never going to get anywhere, mister.”
Yeah, back in those days education wasn’t as focused on making people feel good, like it is now. Back then they actually wanted me to learn something.
Bastards.
So anyway, when I was 18, I moved out to Westwood, with the intention of just enrolling in the UCLA extension, and going to college that way. Trouble was, I kept getting work as an actor, and I was never able to see my plan all the way through. Around that time I decided to take my semi-retirement from acting, and, instead of staying here in Los Angeles and just going to school, I ended up in Topeka, Kansas, working for NewTek. Being on campus again, though, brought back many happy memories. You know, my life is so different now, so much more complicated and filled with responsibility…I wish I’d known back then how easy things truly were, but I guess part of the halcyon of youth is not knowing…
Anyway, I completely digress. The point is, I went to UCLA to hear and meet Michael Moore, which I did. I got there nice and early, to ensure that I had a seat, and sat in line reading “Trust Us, We’re Experts.” I felt so subversive, standing there in my OBEYT-shirt, wearing a backpack filled with controversial books, waiting to hear this guy who so many uberconservatives hate.
So they finally let us into the auditorium, we watch a few minutes of “The Awful Truth”, and Michael Moore arrives, and begins his talk.
I realize that I don’t often get to go watch people speak, and it’s a rarity that I am on this side of the microphone, so I pay very close attention to the way he speaks, how he interacts with the audience, when he gets off point, how he gets back on point. It’s funny: I’m there to see this guy who I respect and admire, and I’m not even listening to him. I’m making mental notes, so the next time I speak, I do more of one thing, and less of another. It’s the same thing that happens when I watch a movie, or see a play.
He starts slowly, but he finds his groove, and gives what I think is a great talk for about an hour or so. He doesn’t say anything that I haven’t already heard or read from him, but he does make one point that is very inspiring to me: he suggests that our country is not as right-wing as the right-wing would have us believe. He tells us how his book, which almost did not get published, is number one at amazon, number 3 on the New York Times best seller list, and number 9 ( i think. I’m not too sure about that number, but it’s in the top ten) on the Wall Street Journal best seller list. He tells us how the vast majority of people in this country support unions, oppose the death penalty, are pro-choice, and pro-environment. He suggests that “president” Bush’s approval ratings are less an endorsement of the “president”, but more a condemnation of terrorism. He suggests that when your house is attacked, you rally around the leader, but he tells us that Bush is going down, because we’ve just seen the tip of the iceberg with Enron.
He also inspires us all to take action. He tells us that great changes in history have been brought about by tiny, individual actions. He reminds us that the end of segregation was brought about because a tired seamstress didn’t want to get up and move, because her feet were tired. He tells us about many, many instances where one person, who was otherwise unremarkable, made a ripple which became a tsunami.
I am so inspired, and so heartened, not only because he’s reaffirming what I know in my heart to be true, but because I am surrounded by 18 and 19 year-old kids, and they are all inspired to take action, too. For the first time in a long time, I am filled with hope, and I think that our country is not doomed.
When he’s done, he hangs around to sign his books, and I wait in another line. This line is moving very slowly, because Michael Moore stops to talk to each person who comes up to him, and again I think how funny it is for me to be on the other side of the table.
After about 30 minutes, there are only 3 people in front of me, and I am getting really nervous. I know that I have about 45 seconds to say what I want to say, and make my impression, and I really want to stand out to him, you know? I don’t want to be just another person saying “me too!” So I get up to where he is, and I ask him to please sign my book to Wil, with one “L”, which he does. I tell him that we have a mutual friend in Tom Tomorrow, and that Tom says for him to check his email. Michael Moore smiles at me, asks me how I know Tom Tomorrow, and I tell him because of our websites. I tell him that I really admire and respect him, and I thank him for his support of unions and working class people. I tell him that I am on the board of directors of my union, and that I’m trying to make the union stronger and more focused on the needs of its members. He asks me what union, I tell him that it’s SAG, and he stops for a second. He says, “Wait- what’s your name?” I tell him that my name is Wil Wheaton, and he says, “I know your name. And now I recognize your face. Why do I recognize you?” I tell him that I was in Star Trek and Stand By Me, and I realize that I always feel sort of sheepish and embarrassed when I share this fact with anyone. He goes, “Oh! That’s why! Cool! So you’re active in your union?” I tell him that I am, even though, thanks to the recent election, we are totally doomed.
Then he does something that’s really cool: he extends his hand, and he says, “Thank you for…” but I’m so giddy that he’s telling me thank you, and shaking my hand, that I totally don’t even hear what he says. I wonder how often that happens when I meet people at shows?
So that was it. I thanked him, he told me to tell Tom Tomorrow that he will check his email, and I was on my way, book clutched to my chest like a total geek.
On my way out, I go up Bruin Walk, where there are about 100 kids, all of them handing out flyers in support of their various causes, some progressive, some conservative, but all of them passionate and determined.
I realize that, despite what the lazy, corporate media would have us believe, the youth of America, at least as UCLA, does care, and they are active. The Establishment would be wise to start paying attention to them, because I get the impression that they’re not going to be seen and not heard for very much longer.

It’s Friday, I’m in Love

Remember when we were younger, and we’d start planning our Friday nights on Tuesday?
Remember those big plans, to go out to a club, or a concert, or a show, and find some hot member of the opposite sex, and take them home?
Yeah, me neither.
But now that we’re older, our Friday night plans usually go something like this:

  • heat up leftovers
  • start laundry
  • clean up kitchen
  • move laundry from washer to dryer
  • clean up living room
  • take burned dinner out of oven
  • curse at oven
  • order dinner
  • open bottle of wine, so it can “breathe” before dinner gets here
  • vaccuum family room
  • pour glass of wine while waiting
  • clean bathroom
  • pour second glass of wine
  • call boss, give him a piece of my mind
  • get into argument on internet
  • yell at delivery guy for taking two $#!ing hours to deliver my lasagna, which is now cold
  • pour third glass of wine
  • pour fourth glass of wine
  • fall into sad, nostalgic stupor watching Wacky Races on Boomerang
  • pass out ^H^H^H^H^H^H^H go to sleep

Sound familiar? Want to return to the days when we were crazy and free? The days when we’d actually go out on a Friday night, because, goddammit, we were young and free?
Hell yeah!!
Well, I’ve got something for you, chucky: If you live in or near Los Angeles, and you don’t know what to do for your Friday night, you can come and see me, Wil Wheaton, live and in person, on the J. Keith vanStraaten show!!
Tonight’s guests include Bruno Kirby, comedian John O’Donnell, and kickass band Blockage.
The show is always insanely fun, and I’d love to meet any WWDN readers who come over to see us.
We are at the ACME Comedy Theatre, and the show starts at 10 PM. There are only 6 shows this season, so time is already running out. You can get information on reservations and ticket prices from Keith’s website.
Now, if you’re not in or near Los Angeles, of you’re just afraid to leave the house without your Tinfoil Hat, I have another thing that you can do tonight: you can stay home, safe and secure, and watch my sister, Amy, on First Monday, tonight at 9PM on CBS.
Now how about that? Who else on the internet helps plan out your Friday night Social Calendar?
Nobody, that’s who.
Except for your old pal Uncle Willie, because he cares.

Natural Mystic

Yesterday, I finally got some new headshots done. They should be back from the lab next week.
I’ve been using the same headshot for years, and it’s really been time for a new one for quite awhile…but the thing is, I absolutely hate having my picture taken.
I bet that seems weird, what with me being an actor, and all, but it’s true. I’d much rather be holding the camera than posing for it. Unless I’m posing for some midget porn, so I can get on the Kevin and Bean Show.
But yesterday was different. The photographer was really awesome, and we approached it from a more creative place, and it was more like working on a short film. I’m very excited to see the results next week.
Guess what I got in the mail? A whole buncha CDs! Some old blues records, and some amazing Bob Marley records. If you listen to reggae, you owe it to yourself to pick up the deluxe edition of Exodus! A big thank you to the cool guys who sent me awesome music.
Speaking of awesome music, I have gotten tons of emails today about WILLIAM FUCKING SHATNER’S Blog. The general tone of the emails is that he’s ripping me off…but I don’t think that’s the case, at all. I mean, I wasn’t the first person to write a weblog, and I’m certainly not the best.
If he really wrote it, I think it would be really cool…but I doubt that it’s really him. If it is, I suspect that it’s heavily edited. Tsumo at metafilter said, I really can’t imagine Shatner overtaking Wil in popularity any time soon. There’s just a completely different… feel… to Shatner’s site. ‘Overproduced’ would the be word that comes to mind. Wheaton’s is just down-home fanboyish and a lot more fun to read. Shatner’s entry felt so polished and professional that I can’t help it was passed by half a dozen copy editors on its way to the website.”

On the other hand, Michael Moore (who is going to be in Los Angeles from today until Friday! I get to see him on Friday! Weeeeee!) is keeping a weblog, and he really does write it, and I think it’s awesome.
One final thing, before I head off to work: A friend of ours, Amanda, occasionally babysits for Ryan and Nolan. Amanda is incredibly smart, very driven, honest, caring, and just an all-around good person, who really deserves all the good things in life. Well, I heard last night that she got accepted into USC, and maybe even into Occidental, too. Congratulations, Amanda! You deserve it!
Oh! I taught Ryan how to juggle last night, because they’re doing a medieval day at his school, and he’s dressing up as a court jester. It was really awesome. My relationship with Ryan has always been at arm’s length, because I haven’t ever wanted to force myself into his life…but in the last 2 months or so he’s really made major efforts to come to me, and close that gap. It’s wonderful.
Thought for today:

“If we wish to secure peace for ourselves, we must start by championing it for others.”

Cities in Dust

I am so damn handy. Today, I replaced a messed up sensor light which hangs on my garage. Turned the power off and everything. Then I replaced a fixture in the kitchen, and turned my sights on this area under the kitchen window where nothing will grow.
I “planted” 30 pounds of black river stones over the dirt, until I can think of something better to put there.
I was so damn handy around the house, I told my wife to turn on the porno music, because I was comin’ inside, “to get a drink”.
Well, it’s all true except that last part. I wasn’t coming in for a drink! Oh yeah! Yeah baby! Woo!!
Wait. Wait.
That’s not true, either. I came in for a sandwich, and then we went back to Home Despot for more hardware and stuff.
See, the thing is, we’ve lived in our house for 2 years, and we haven’t taken care of any of the things we said we’d take care of when we moved in: the lawn still looks like shit, the ugly wood paneling is still on the walls in the living room and family room, and the ugly brass lamp hangs over the dining room table.
But all of that is about to change. Thanks to the sense of empowerment we got today when I hung that damn light fixture, all by my self, in my big-boy pants, Anne and I have made…A List(tm).
That’s right, folks, A List(tm). On this list is everything we want to do to our house, how much it will cost, and when we’re going to work it out.
Next on the list? Rent a roto-tiller, tear up the ugly-ass lawn, rake out the lumps, dig trenches, install sprinklers, and lay down sod.
Sounds expensive, doesn’t it? It’s not. We can do the whole thing for about 50 cents a square foot, total. Because we’re doing it ourselves, we’ll be saving literally thousands of dollars (which we don’t have, anyway…but I’m hiring Arthur Andersen as my new accountant…I’m an overnight millionaire!)
Once that is done, we will focus our attention on the ugly 1970s-homemade-porn-backdrop-style wood paneling which is currently offending all standards of good taste by hanging in not 1, but 3 rooms in our house.
There’s a rumor that I’m going to have Gallery up and running very, very soon, as well…so that means lots of before and after pictures of our rooms…and pictures of my handyman butt crack.

The Dark Side of The Moon<

The past few days, I’ve been in sort of a funk, and I haven’t really been able to put my finger on exactly what it is.
Until tonight.
I was talking about it with Anne tonight while we were folding our clothes, and I think we puzzled it out: it feels to me like the world is just…well, it’s just falling apart.
I don’t know if you’re hearing this if you live out of California, but a 7 year old girl was kidnapped from her own bedroom, about a month ago. Yesterday, they found a body, and today they identified it as hers. I can’t stop thinking about the incredible pain and loss that her parents are feeling, right now. I mean, jesus christ, if your kids aren’t safe in their own freaking beads, where are they safe? What the F*** happened?!
I turn on the television, and the Israleis and Palestinians are blowing the shit out of each other, every chance they get, it’s 90 degrees in FEBRUARY, and people rejoice, rather than think about the fact that maybe it’s like this from global warming and pollution. As I wrote recently, there’s a potentially innocent man about to be executed down in Missourri, one of who knows how many innocents currently facing the death penalty. Thousands of people lost EVERYTHING because of the greed and hubris of Ken Lay and the rest of Enron, and we all know that they’ll probably get away with it.
And if all that isn’t enough, I hear that there’s a sequel to Battlefield Earth in the works.
I could go on and on, but I think you get what I’m going for, here.
It’s so weird, because as recently as a few days ago, I was feelin’ just fine…but something about the kidnap and murder of this completely innocent child has made something snap inside of me, and my glass is suddenly half-empty.
Am I alone, here? Am I the only one who reads the paper, listens to NPR, and thinks that something is terribly, terribly wrong?
Sorry to be such a downer…but there are a lot of smart, thoughtful people who read the old WWDN, and I bet we’ll all figure some stuff out, if we talk about it.
Thought for today:

“Everybody wants a happy life.”