Category Archives: Sports

dropped to the sun alone

Anne and Ryan were out on Friday, which left Nolan and me to goof off at home when I got back from working on Legion of Super Heroes.

We had big plans: some Magic: The Gathering, a little Brawl, and maybe some OGRE and heads-up poker.

But when I got home, the goddamn pine tree in the front yard dropped a huge ball of pollen down on my car, and I spent the next four hours on the couch sneezing and trying to fight off the allergy-induced headache that felt like it was going to split my head in twain. Good times. Good times.

Nolan ended up playing Diablo II while I watched the Los Angeles Dodgers of Los Angeles pwn the Los Angeles Angels of Not Los Angeles Because We Play In Orange County But Our Idiot Owner Wants To Have Los Angeles In Our Name Because He’s A Moron.

For those of you who missed the sixth inning massacre, the final board was:

LAD – 16 25 1
LAANLABWPOCBOIOWHLAIOWBHAM: 3 10 2

Of course, the Dodgers did their best to blow their fifteen run lead, by letting Carter come in and give up three hits and a run, and though I normally don’t like games that are total blowouts, watching the Dodgers on the winning side of it for a change, and especially at the expense of the stupid Angels who swept us last year, was awesome. I should also add that the Los Angeles Dodgers of Los Angeles shutout the Los Angeles Because We Play In Orange County But Our Idiot Owner Wants To Have Los Angeles In Our Name Because He’s A Moron to complete the sweep, and move up to 1/2 a game out of first in what is probably the weakest division this side of 7 year-olds playing little league.

Speaking of the Dodgers, yesterday, my dad took me to Chavez Ravine for some LAD vs LAANLABWPOCBOIOWHLAIOWBHAM action, and it was awesome. There are pictures in my buzznet blog, including a shot of Tommy Lasorda, who is the closest to royalty you’ll see at Dodger Stadium, who got a standing ovation from our entire section when he walked from his seat to wherever it is you go when you’re Tommy Fucking Lasorda and you rule.

Anyway, back to Friday: After the only team on the field worthy of having Los Angeles in their name blew the game wide open, I picked up my bag of comics from Free Comic Book Day, and finally had a look at the books I picked up. Most of them were a solid "meh," but that’s the whole point of FCBD: to see new stuff that may not excite everyone, but introduce new readers to new material. If you’re a guy like me who is already pretty narrow in tastes, it’s unlikely you’re going to find much that excites you. However, there were a few things that I really liked that I’ll pick up next time I’m at my friendly local comics shop:

The Bongo freebie was also funny (and funnier than the average episode of the Simpsons these days, which is not meant as a backhanded complement) and the Fantagraphics Funnybook was fantastic.

Around ten, my antihistamines finally started to work, and my headache began to subside as it was overtaken by drowsiness. I fell asleep watching Dark City, which is still a hell of a lot of fun to watch, whether you’ve got a head filled with antihistamines or not.

Today, Anne and I opened up a new front in the War on Shit All Over Our House and Yard (Operation Enduring Yardwork) and pruned the hell out of a tree in the front yard, as well as tearing out all the weeds that had attempted to establish a beachhead in one of our front yard planters. Rain threatened all day today, but never arrived, which was great, because the combination of breeze and humidity provided just the right level of comfort for fighting the forces of Bermuda grass and their allies the tree-looking things that spring up all over the goddamn place. In a fit of planning ahead, I did my best Sean Penn imitation and snorted a whole bunch of Flonase (relax, I have a prescription) before I started the work today, and I was able to work for about five hours before simple exhaustion overcame me (rather than the sneezing and allergy-related misery I experienced Friday night.)

After all my yard work was done, I decided to take a break and play a little poker at PokerStars, so I hopped into a 4-player heads-up sit-n-go (I was inspired after watching the Heads-up Championship on NBC this morning.) I really like those matches, because most of the players at the lower buy-ins are very straightforward (so you know your pair of kings is no good when they bet into you on an A-high board) and you only have to beat two players to win three buy-ins, instead of 8 players in a regular sit-n-go. At one point, my first round opponent had me down to just a few big blinds, but I got insanely lucky and bounced back, tilting him in the process and taking it down. My second round opponent had the classic online tell: he’d check the "check/fold" box when he was in the BB if he didn’t like his hand, so I’d call and if he insta-checked, I knew I could bet no matter what on the flop and get him to fold. I rode the right combination of luck and trusting my reads to victory, turning my mighty five dollar buy-in into twenty dollars when I flopped TP and a flush draw with AT and got him to call me with KT when my flush missed.

Okay, now it’s time to go watch The Simpsons, in the lame hope that it manges to be funny this week.

Uh, okay, the whole opening bit with the attacking couches? Brilliant. Even if the rest of the show veers off into that weird Jesusland they’ve been hitting so frequently this season, that was worth the price of admission.

Wait. The baseball bit? Very funny. This "homer is the relationship counselor" bit? The polar opposite of funny. Are they hiring old 1970s sit-com writers? This is like a rejected Three’s Company script. Give me another monorail, please. Please, I beg you.

quasi-live blogging wednesday’s dodger bullpen meltdown

Molskine_fish_jerky
I
was supposed to take Nolan to the Dodger game on Wednesday, but he opted to stay home and work on a history project, because he wants to get the best grade possible. "There will be a lot of Dodger games this year," he said on Tuesday, "but if I blow it on this project, I don’t get a second chance. I’m sorry we can’t go together."

Longtime readers of my blog know how that made me feel, and I’m still proud of him, three days later.

Since I already bought our tickets, I called my brother Jeremy and asked him if he’d like to go in Nolan’s place. He accepted, and we had an absolute blast at the game, even though the Dodger bullpen is painfully bad this year.

I blogged it, live-to-Molskine, and transcribed the whole thing at blogging.la:

7:47 PM – Navarro is up with the bases empty. I say to
Jeremy, "You know, not only can Navarro not make the throw to second,
he can’t hit, either." The words are barely out of my mouth when
Navarro slams the second pitch about 380′ for a solo homer. Jeremy
says, "Yes! Get angry at my brother, Navarro! Who’s up next? You also
suck!"

7:50 PM – The kid in front of us to our left has a chocolate
malt with a wooden spoon-shaped thing. I guess the plastic spoon was
just user error. Whew.

7:55 PM – Seo has a really great curveball.

7:58 PM – Piazza breaks up the no-hitter with a double to the
wall in center-right. Whatever. He’s still totally gay (not that
there’s anything wrong with that.) Jeremy blames me because I pointed
out that Seo had a no-hitter through four.

8:01 PM – Middle of the 4th, and they’re doing that Coca Cola
answer a question and win a coke thing down on the field. The guy gets
it right, and a really hot girl walks off the field with him. I say,
"Hey, she thinks she’s getting his coke, and doesn’t even know it’s soda!" Jeremy says, "Yeah, she’s toatally a Coke whore." We think we’re the funniest guys in the world. High-five.

8:06 PM – Kent is up with runners at the corners. I say to
Jeremy, "You know, the problem with Kent is that he’s really on the
downside of his career. Not only does he stuggle to turn two, he can’t
come through in the clutch with runners at the corners." I look down at
the field and say, "Your move, Mister Kent." Unfortunately, my
Navarro-fu doesn’t work and Kent is out.

the los angeles flatheads

Flatheads

Two tickets from TicketBastard: $52

Parking: $10

Four Dodger Dogs, two sodas: $27


Crushing heads with my stepson:
Priceless

Watching the Los Angeles Dodgers of Los Angeles blow a one-run lead in the 8th to lose to the Cubs: Sadly predictable.