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After a week on CSI, it’s no mystery why this is the number one drama on television.
Everyone I’ve seen is fiercely dedicated to the success of the show. The actors know and care about their characters, and how they interact with each other. When they’re called to the set, they come immediately. They are prepared: they know their lines and they talk with each other and the director about the scene.
The attention to detail at all levels is meticulous to the point of obsession. Yesterday, I walked around the stage, and looked at the set decoration. Every bit of paper on the wall was from a police department. The magazines in one of the offices aren’t just Las Vegas Showtime guides, they’re Las Vegas Showtime Guides from this freaking year. When the makeup department turns me into Walter, I sit in the chair for half an hour while I get scabs and scars and dirt and track marks and scrapes and cold sores and all sorts of other things applied. It would be easy to just make my hands dirty, but there’s a beautiful logic to the makeup: this scrape leads into this scab, this bruise has a track mark in the middle of it. This streak of dirt ends on my finger, so there’s black makeup applied beneath that nail, and it’s thicker than the gunk beneath the next fingernail. Will the audience notice? Probably not. If the audience is marvelling at how realistic my dirty hands are, we’re in trouble dramatically . . . but all those details add up unconsciously to make the show real. I know as an actor that it’s helped me inhabit Walter at a cellular level. In fact, Walter is the first character I’ve played in my entire career where I have been able to completely abandon myself and totally commit to becoming another person . . . and it’s the most fun I have ever had.

The production office gives DVDs of the recently-aired shows to all the department heads so they know what’s happening in the various story arcs, and every single person that I’ve talked to is proud of the show. I get the sense that this is more than just a paycheck for the people who bring the show to life, they are part of something special, and they know it. CSI could be exclusively about solving the crimes, and it would still be entertaining . . . but it’s the development of the characters, and they devotion with which the actors bring those characters to life that sets CSI apart from its countless imitators.
Friday night, I overheard two of the regulars talking about an episode from a year or so ago.
“Man, I remember the day we shot that,” Actor A said. “It was the end of a long day, I was tired, and I just wanted to go home.”
Actor B said, “Yeah, we’ve all been there.”
“But the scene really suffered because of that,” Actor A said, “and I vowed that I would never let it happen again.”
The hours are long, and the crew frequently works “splits” where you shoot some day exteriors as well as night exteriors. I’ve worked splits before, and they pretty much suck if you want to have any sort of life outside of work . . . but I haven’t heard a single person complain.
Fun fact: there’s wireless in all the stages where they shoot CSI. Sad fact: my iBook’s hard drive had a seizure, so it’s currently at Apple General Hospital and I can’t use the WAP at the studio.
I can WarChalk the studio when I get to work today, though. 🙂

What an amazing day!
Working on CSI is as cool as we all think it is. In fact, it’s cooler. The cast, the crew, the director, the writers, the producers . . . everyone is incredibly cool! I know that I’m only on the show for a few days, but I left the set tonight feeling like I belonged there. Wow. It’s the way people told me we made them feel when they worked on TNG, and that’s pretty cool.
Turning into Walter was really fun, other than the extreme pain that came with my wig. Because I did a stunt tonight (I have to be very careful, and not give any of the plot away, so bear with me) my wig needed to be “anchored” to my own hair. To do that, they hair department put this stuff called hair glue on me, and twisted my real hair into little bundles that they secured with rubber bands. Holy shit did that hurt. Then they put the wig on me, and used pins to “anchor” the wig to those little hair glue balls that happen to be attached to my scalp. Believe it or not, it’s actually as fun as it sounds!
The director (who fucking rocks!) and I decided that Walter has this dangerous volatility to him, that is a result of the voices in his head. Walter uses drugs and alcohol to quiet those voices in his head . . . but it’s not working as well as he hoped it would. In fact, it’s kinda making it worse. Okay, it’s really making it worse, and playing that was just too much fun. Of course, because I’m in a serious makeup and costume thing, it’s that much easier to totally become this guy.
We shot out in Northridge tonight, in this über suburban area, and I *really* wanted to wander around the streets in my Walter clothes and makeup, shouting at people that only I could see. I was going to take bets on how long I could get away with that before someone called the police . . . but it turned out that I had real work to do, so that will sadly remain just an idea. Maybe next time.
This neat thing happened tonight. One of the crew came over to me and said, “It’s like you’re getting paid to play.”
“Yeah, I didn’t work all last year, so I could save up for this part,” I said, only half-joking.
But it’s true. I’m having so much fun, and I had this great Moment of Clarity™ tonight after a particularly good take: “This is why I wanted to be an actor”, I thought, “I can’t believe how lucky I am!”
I’ve made some notes, and I’ll do my best to write a cool blog about the day, but it’s past midnight, and I have to be back on the set tomorrow morning, so I’m going to sleep now . . . right after I wash all this hair glue off my head.
\m/

My second Games of our lives column hit the web this morning. It’s about one of my favorite weird arcade games, Make Trax.

Yesterday, I told one of my friends that I felt really good about this job, but I didn’t want to think that this is some huge “I’m back!” deal, where I buy into all the bullshit hype that Hollywood likes to sneak into your drink when you’re not looking.
“I am hyper-aware of not believing my own hype.” I said. “So much, I often don’t stop to enjoy it when good things happen.”
He thought a second and said, “It’s a simple matter of not telling everyone else how cool you feel and then re-evaluating the following day. For me often times success mitigates itself the next day.”
He is extraordinarily successful, and does about a million cool things a day, so I think he knows what he’s talking about.
“I guess what I mean is, all these people e-mail, and comment, and tell me that they’re pulling for me, and hoping that one of these things finally works out. Now that it’s happened, I feel like I’ve lived up to their belief in me.” I said. “Do you know I mean? Or do I sound like a total dick?”
“Nah, that’s it.” He said.
So, I hope my friend is right. I want to take a moment and say:
Thank you. Thank you for believing in me. Thank you for supporting me the last few years, while I’ve sort of really struggled to figure out who I am and where I’m going. Thank you all so much for sending your thoughts my way while I worry about Sketch. Thank you to everyone who has left a comment, or sent an e-mail, or blogged about CSI. I know that this is just one stop along The Journey, and the hype is certianly not going to my head . . . but I think I would be a fool if I didn’t stop and enjoy it just a little bit.
Okay, a lot 🙂
Things continue to be Balanced, though. Sketch hasn’t improved at the rate we thought and hoped he would. Though he doesn’t seem to be uncomfortable or unhappy at all, and he’s eating regularly, his breathing is still very high (between 44 and 50). He responds to his diuretic, but I’m worried about the stress it’s putting on his little kidneys. He is going to be re-checked tomorrow morning and we’ll know more . . . but I’m still scared. He’s been sleeping on my chest every night since he came home, and my heart aches when I face the reality that he may not be doing that much longer.
So I’ll have a whole bunch of emotional turmoil, which I’ll use to bring Walter to life when I shoot the episode, which I just found out starts tomorrow afternoon for me.
I’ll write as much about the experience as the production will allow, and I hope to update my moblog and audioblog frequently, as long as it doesn’t get in the way of work.

What’s My Line? Live On Stage! made Defamer’s ToDo list for tonight! Congratulations to Keith and Jim and Mike and everyone else who makes the show possible.
I am very proud of the production, especially because I know how much hard work goes on behind the scenes to research the original TV show, and recreate the experience as faithfully as possible for the audience.
If you’re looking for something to do tonight, and you want to see . . . The “Beard” . . . in action, come on out. The show is at ACME at 8.