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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

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WIL WHEATON dot NET
WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

Books

Radio Free Burrito Presents: Thoughts on the Worldstate by Henry Kuttner

Posted on 1 April, 2020 By Wil

I wasn’t planning on recording today, but while I was looking for something to record tomorrow, I found a thing that I loved so much, I couldn’t wait.

The story I chose is titled “Thoughts on the Worldstate”, and it was written by Henry Kuttner. It is from the Spring, 1940, issue of Futuria Fantastia, which was edited by Ray Bradbury. (Side note: if you’re looking for something to read, and you enjoy speculative fiction, I think you may like this issue of the magazine as much as I do. It’s a whole lot of fun to read, and the illustrations are pretty great.)

 

blog

breathe, breathe in the air…

Posted on 1 April, 20201 April, 2020 By Wil

I don’t know about you, but I feel anxious and wound pretty tightly. It’s not great, Bob.

So I’m being the person I need in the world. This is for me, and for anyone who needs it:

  1. Take a deep breath. Hold it and close your eyes for a few seconds.
  2. Gently exhale and feel the breath leave your body. Inhale, and feel it come back in.
  3. Relax your shoulders. You’re holding a ton of tension in your neck and shoulders and you’ve been doing it so long, you don’t even notice it.
  4. You’re clenching your jaw, too. Open your mouth and take in a big breath. Feel that air nourish you and let the nourishment spread outward through your body, from your lungs to the tips of all your fingers and toes.

Repeat if you like, and then think of three things you are grateful for.

  • I am grateful for my health.
  • I am grateful I have enough.
  • I am grateful for the love and support of my wife and children.

This helped me unwind a little bit. Maybe it’ll help you, too.

Stay safe, stay healthy, and please choose kindness.

Radio Free Burrito Presents: The Ghost of Harrowby Hall

Posted on 31 March, 202031 March, 2020 By Wil

While I listen to medical professionals and practice self-quarantine at home, I’m making an effort to create and release free audio book shorts every few days. It’s a good way for me to stay connected to my creative self, when my everything else self is so anxious and scared, all it wants to do is hide under the blankets and play video games.

I’m doing what I can, to do use the skills I have during this pandemic in a way that is helpful. At first blush, creating entertainment seems kind of silly and pointless right now. People are dying, people are unemployed, and we’re all doing our best to not freak out, right? We need masks and PPE and ventilators, and a president who isn’t a fucking incompetent liar, who puts his personal accumulation of wealth and power ahead of the lives of the people he is supposed to lead.

Everyone does what they can in times of crisis. For someone who is a first responder, they know exactly what to do right now. It’s what they’ve dedicated their lives to. Same for medical professionals. Then we have the heroic efforts of the supermarket employees, package delivery employees, and local restaurants, who all know precisely what their call to public service is going to be during this crisis.

But what about entertainers? I mean, can you think of anything more useless? People are dying and you’re going to read me a story? Really?

…well, yeah. Because that’s all I can do. My skill set is limited to performing and entertaining. It’s not the path I would have chosen for myself, but it’s what I know how to do, and it’s something that I’m not terrible at. In fact, I’m pretty good at it (he says, knowing he would make different performance choices if he did this one again), and it seems like a waste to just crawl into a blanket fort right now, while everyone else is doing what they can to help.

So I’m going to entertain, the best that I can, because that’s what I know how to do. I mean, I still want to be entertained and distracted right now, maybe more than ever. There is nothing I look forward to these days as much as I look forward to Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune every night, because for an hour I get to forget that the world is on fire.

What if I could be to someone else what Jeopardy is to me? What if I used these skills I have to make some entertainment for anyone who wants it? It’s not the worst idea! I am by far not the worst!

I’m having fun doing this, and I’ll keep doing it as long as people are listening and want me to continue.

Today’s reading is The Ghost of Harrowby Hall. It’s a 19th century satirical ghost story with some great dialog.

 

blog

Sunday afternoon with my family.

Posted on 30 March, 202030 March, 2020 By Wil
This whole pandemic is hard on everyone, in a lot of different ways. I’m incredibly lucky so far, and I don’t have to worry about food or going broke, but I’ve been *really* feeling how I don’t have loving, unselfish parents in my life who I can lean on, and get comfort from, while I do my best to get through all of this.
 
Yesterday, LeVar organized a Zoom thingy for all of us from TNG, because normally we would be together for Marina’s birthday, but obviously we can’t do that this year.
 
For about 90 minutes or so, we all hung out, visited with each other, loved each other, laughed our faces off, and felt connected, as a family.
I didn’t realize until long after we had ended the thing, just how much it meant to me to be with my family, the family that loves me unconditionally, unselfishly, simply because I exist. I’ve been so focused on being a reliable husband and father, I haven’t had a moment to exhale, and just be a son who is scared and anxious and needs parents to just tell him everything is going to be okay, and who will acknowledge that he’s doing the best that he can.
 
I got all of that from my Star Trek family, at a time when I didn’t even know just how much I needed it. I feel like I’ve been holding my breath for weeks, and yesterday, I exhaled for the first time.
Image
 
And can I just take a moment to observe how totally cool it is that we were using a real technology to be together, a technology that we used to pretend was real, for our job. I can’t prove that video conferencing like this exists because of Next Generation, but I can certainly choose to believe that we played some part in inspiring the engineers who developed it.
 
Wherever you are, I hope you’re getting the love and support that you need and deserve. We’re all going to get through this, together.
Books

Radio Free Burrito Presents: The Sun Goddess

Posted on 26 March, 2020 By Wil

I don’t want to commit myself to making full-on Radio Free Burritos right now, but I do want to stay creative and productive while I listen to experts who are not fucking idiots and stay home until the doctors tell me it’s safe for everyone to go back to the Old Ways of three weeks ago.

I love narrating audiobooks. I love that my job is to read and perform, to bring stories to life, for people who want to be distracted and entertained. It’s a real blessing that I get to combine things that I love, and do them for my job.

So while I’m staying home and feeling grateful af that I can afford to be out of everyone’s way for at least several months, I want to do something, however small, to give people who are stressed out, overwhelmed, or just bored, something to listen to while they catch their breath.

And as long as this works (meaning I enjoy it and people want me to keep doing it), I’ll be reading short stories from the public domain every few days, and uploading them to my SoundCloud.

I read these cold, and I don’t do any editing, so you’ll hear me mess up, you’ll hear background noise, and it won’t be as polished as the work I’ve done for Big Audiobook, but it’s free, so back off, man.

Anyway, here’s today’s. I hope you enjoy it.

A Japanese myth, published in 1918.

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