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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

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WIL WHEATON dot NET
WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

just nod if you can hear me

Posted on 10 February, 2008 By Wil

I spent the last four days in Bat Country, while recovering from major sinus surgery. I’ll spare the gory (and oh my god are they gory) details, but when all this packing comes out of my sinuses on Tuesday, I can look forward to not snoring all night and waking up with a skull crushing sinus headache for the first time in about ten years. I’m planning a party, all by myself with some toast and a cup of coffee.

I don’t think I’ll be posting much until I’m back to normal, but I didn’t want anyone to think I’ll fallen down a well next to little Timmy Turner.O’Toole. (My bad. I’m so full of painkillers and meds that all I can do ism,nsdnsakazza,mmp.)

Unless Sting wants to write a song about it, in which case, please send your love down the well.

I voted today

Posted on 5 February, 2008 By Wil

I cast my vote for Barack Obama in California’s primary this morning.

Here’s a major reason why I did:

“When I am this party’s nominee, my opponent will not be able to say
that I voted for the war in Iraq; or that I gave George Bush the
benefit of the doubt on Iran; or that I supported Bush-Cheney policies
of not talking to leaders that we don’t like. And he will not be able
to say that I wavered on something as fundamental as whether or not it
is ok for America to torture — because it is never ok… I will end the
war in Iraq… I will close Guantanamo. I will restore habeas corpus. I
will finish the fight against Al Qaeda. And I will lead the world to
combat the common threats of the 21st century: nuclear weapons and
terrorism; climate change and poverty; genocide and disease. And I will
send once more a message to those yearning faces beyond our shores that
says, "You matter to us. Your future is our future. And our moment is
now.”

Patrick Nielsen Hayden, (via John Scalzi,) put my feelings into words, so I’m going to borrow them, rather than struggle to come up with my own:

I’m for Obama knowing perfectly well that, as Bill
Clinton suggested, it’s a “roll of the dice”. A roll of the dice for
Democrats, for progressives, for those of us who’ve fought so hard
against the right-wing frames that Obama sometimes (sometimes craftily,
sometimes naively) deploys. Because I think a Hillary Clinton candidacy
will be another game of inches, yielding—at best—another four or eight
years of knifework in the dark. Because I think an Obama candidacy
might actually shake up the whole gameboard, energize good people,
create room and space for real change.

Because he seems to know
something extraordinarily important, something so frequently missing
from progressive politics in this country, in this time: how to hearten people. Because when I watch him speak, I see fearful people becoming brave.

We’ve been afraid for too long, and it’s cost us dearly. Karl Rove and George Bush and Dick Cheney will have many disastrous legacies, but one of the most despicable and enduring will be how they used fear to deeply and deliberately divide our country.

It’s going to be a huge challenge for our next president to heal this nation, and end the Culture of Fear that’s been created by the Bush Administration. I believe that Barack Obama is the best candidate to do that, and I was proud to vote for him today.

It felt so good to cast a vote that I was proud of, in support of
someone, instead of resigning myself to voting for the lesser of two
evils.

regarding voice acting . . .

Posted on 4 February, 2008 By Wil

Over at Joystiq, Griffin McElroy wrote about Keith David’s growing celebrity in video games. He’s probably best known for playing the Arbiter in Halo 2 and Halo 3, but he’s also in Mass Effect and a bunch of other extremely popular games.

McElroy takes this condescending, dismissive tone toward Keith David’s career, calling him a "B-List" actor, and implying that, because he hadn’t worked that often on camera recently, he resorted to voices in video games, where — hey, backhanded compliment — he’s doing surprisingly well for himself!

"These kinds of jobs are quickly gaining popularity in Hollywood, says
Reuters, as voice work provides a much steadier paycheck than that of
on-screen roles. We see it as a win-win situation — down on their luck
actors with distinct voices can find a nice amount of celebrity in the
gaming realm…"

Wow. This is so profoundly misinformed, and based on such confirmation bias, it’s too stupid to be offensive. I’ve been fortunate enough to spend a lot of time doing voice work, both for video games and for animation, and it is not easy. "Down on their luck actors" don’t get to just walk into a studio and
wave around their list of long-forgotten on-camera achievements in
exchange for a job. You can only get cast in these jobs — and keep
them — if you have the skills and talent to earn them. It’s an incredibly closed community where the gates are jealously guarded by people who work very, very hard to get inside, and once you’re there, you have to constantly work your ass off to stay there, because there are so many people working just as hard to take your place.

Here’s a shocking truth: a lot of so-called "A-list" celebrities don’t have what it takes to succeed in voice acting, because it’s an entirely different set of skills, and an entirely different work ethic. It’s hard, and it’s competitive, and it’s not someplace "down on their luck actors with distinct voices" go when they can’t go anywhere else. To imply otherwise is an insult to the actors whose voices bring these characters to life. I find that truly offensive.

the luna city arcade: gamer heaven

Posted on 4 February, 2008 By Wil

My dream is to open a classic 80s arcade, complete with well-maintained minigolf, pizza, and waffle cones.

Here’s a look inside the Luna City arcade, which is exactly what I want to do one day:


(via Gizmodo. Thanks to Bob S for the link. RSS subscribers probably need to click through to see the video. Offer available for a limited time. Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.)

A fistful of reviews

Posted on 4 February, 2008 By Wil

While I ramp up for writing more original fiction in 2008, I’ve been making an effort to read more books and watch more movies. Here’s a brief look at some of the things I’ve come across recently that I think are worth your time and money.

Books

Hammered

This is Elizabeth Bear’s first novel, and it kicks off the Jenny Casey trilogy that’s continued in Scardown and concluded in Worldwired. It takes place in a dystopian world that was plausible enough to give me chills, and is the first book I’ve read that I’d admiringly call post-cyberpunk.

Jenny Casey is a cybernetically enhanced former soldier living in post-war Connecticut, dealing with the ghosts of her past. When those ghosts come back to life, they ensnare not only her, but some of her closest friends, as well.

It took me longer than usual to get into the narrative, because the story changes point of view a lot in the beginning, but once I got all the characters straight, I was on board and it was difficult to put down.

This was one of those books where the main character is compelling, but the supporting characters are magnificent. I just loved it, and as soon as I finish Atrocity Archives, I think I’m going to finish the trilogy.

Coraline

Coraline lives in a boring house with uninteresting parents surrounded by strange people. But when she goes through a forbidden door and finds herself trapped on the other side with her Other Mother, her life suddenly becomes very interesting. It’s not quite horror, it’s not quite fantasy . . . I guess I’d call it a "dark fantasy," sort of the way Neverwhere was a dark fantasy. It’s a quick and thoroughly enjoyable read.

I wish this had been written when my kids were still young enough for me to read to them. I have number 238 of the limited Subterranean printing.

After Halloween

I got this book from Daniel Davis when I spent the weekend next to his
Steam Crow booth at Phoenix Comicon. It’s a children’s alphabet book
about what the monsters do to make a living after Halloween. ("E is for Ealwatte, a mage
of the dead / Now he crafts hats to adorn your bald head.")  It’s all
rhyming, it’s charming and funny, and the illustrations are ridiculously awesome. In a world
where everything — especially children’s books and stories — are so
mindnumbingly banal and similar, After Halloween is unique and
wonderful. It’s another one that made me wish my kids were little
enough to enjoy it.

Graphic Novels

WE3

Grant Morrison is with Warren Ellis, Neil Gaiman, and Alan Moore on the list of authors I’ll buy anything from without even reading the back cover, so it’s weird that I just got around to reading WE3 now. (Actually, I started it when I was working on NUMB3RS, and just finished it on Friday. I got distracted, I guess.)

WE3 is about three domestic animals — a dog, a cat, and a rabbit — who are kidnapped by the military and turned into cyborgs to be used as weapons. When the project is going to be terminated and the animals destroyed, they’re set free by a well-meaning researcher. Much of the story is about them trying to survive outside of the lab, while they’re hunted by their former masters. I found it sad and touching. It’s also a story that, I think, only works as a graphic novel, making it pretty unique.

Batman: The Man Who Laughs

A new take on the introduction of The Joker into the Batman universe, this is set right after Batman: Year One, and could be a companion to The Killing Joke. I loved the writing, the shift in narrative between Jim Gordon and Bruce Wayne, and the artwork was perfectly unsettling, without being disturbing. I’m a lifelong Batman geek, so it takes a lot to impress me with a Batman story. This impressed the hell out of me.

Fell Volume One: Feral City

Richard Fell is a detective sent over the bridge from a city that feels like New York to a totally fucked up place called Snowtown. In Snowtown, everyone has something to hide . . . including him. It’s classic detective stories, filtered through Warren’s sublimely twisted lens. I liked it so much, Fell could be the fourth comic to make it onto my single-issue list.

Movies

A Scanner, Darkly

My expectations were really low for this movie, after talking to some
friends about it, so I was pleasantly surprised. I thought the
acting, music, and animation combined very effectively, and I thought they did a better than usual job of
staying true to PKD’s story. Admittedly, this isn’t saying much, but it shouldn’t be misconstrued as a back-handed compliment. I genuinely enjoyed this film.

The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters

One of the most engrossing documentaries I’ve seen in years. On the surface, it’s the story of two men trying to achieve the highest score on Donkey Kong, but the story ends up being about much, much more than the quest for a high score on a video game; it’s about a group of petty sycophants doing everything they can to protect a cowardly tyrant whose tiny fiefdom is threatened by an honorable man. I lost a lot of respect for Twin Galaxies by the time the film was over. I also wanted to go spend a hundred dollars in an arcade.

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