Geek in Review: So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish

Posted on By Wil

Suicide Girls is doing some reorganizing, and the budget for the Newswire is being cut in the process. The Geek in Review is a casualty of the downsizing, so for my final column today, I collected some of my favorites from the last year in So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish.

I’ll be honest: I’m sad that this is over, and I want to thank Sean, Missy, Helen, Erin, Gerry, and Christopher (who brought me here in the first place two years ago as an editor) for making me part of this tremendous community. This has been an incredible time for me, and I’ve really enjoyed working with everyone on the newswire. I’m proud of everything I did here, and it’s been an honor to share the masthead with people like Warren Ellis and Rob Corddry. I don’t know where I’ll take my geeky writings next, but I’m keeping my membership and will be visiting regularly, uh, for the articles . . . even if I’m not writing them.

I’m going to miss doing the GiR, but I’ll be able to look at some of the offers I’ve gotten in the last year to write for other magazines and publications, now that I’ll have a little bit more time in my schedule.

If none of that pans out, I have three Sci-Fi ideas sitting in my mental queue, and as soon as I finish this manga script, I’ll be putting all of my time and creative energy into transforming them from ideas into actual stories, with the intention of collecting them into one book to be released next year. I’m also planning to finish the first season of TNG reviews at TV Squad over the next couple of months, and put all of those into their own book, since the demand for that is pretty high right now. If you subscribe to the notion that everything happens for a reason, the end of the GiR, while sad for me in many ways, could be an enormous opportunity to write some things I’ve wanted to write for a very long time.

MY PRECIOUS!

Posted on By Wil

I just saw, via Propeller, that Peter Jackson has signed on to produce The Hobbit.

Director Peter Jackson, New Line Cinema and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Studios Inc said on Tuesday they have agreed to make two movies based on the book “The Hobbit” by J.R.R. Tolkien, ending months of legal wrangling.

Jackson, the director of the smash hit “Lord of the Rings” movies, and producer Fran Walsh will executive produce both a “Hobbit” movie and a sequel, but no decision has been made about who will direct the films, Bob Shaye and Michael Lynne, co-chairmen and co-CEOs of New Line told Reuters.

The good news is, it’s going to take two whole films to contain its awesomeness. The (potential) bad news is, he won’t be directing. That’s offset by the (potential) good news that it will make its way into theaters before 2011.

King Kong showed that Peter Jackson isn’t infallible, but it’s clear that he loves and respects Tolkien’s work, so I’m sure I’m not the only geek who would be willing to wait until 2011 or 2012 if that’s what it takes to get someone who loves it as much as we do behind the camera. I mean, we’ve waited for decades for this; what’s a few more years to get it right?

Thank you, Chris Dodd

Posted on By Wil

When the Democrats — who I thought were the good (or at least the anti-Bush, and pro-Constitution) guys — took back Congress in the last election, I was overjoyed. I thought we’d see an end — finally — to the Bush administration’s recklessness and lawlessness that’s made me feel ashamed to be American. Of course, the Democratic leadership has been a pathetic, embarrassing, contemptible, miserable failure, and now we see that not only have they enabled Bush’s insanity, they’ve been willing participants, helping him and Dick Cheney feed our constitution into the shredder. Yesterday, for the first time in ages, I felt my faith in our government begin to return, and I have Chris Dodd to thank for it.

It’s been depressing to watch our Democratic congressmen — the very ones we all worked so hard to put into the majority — do nothing to slow Bush’s destruction of what it means to be American.

I still don’t understand why Harry Reid will honor Republican holds and do back flips to make Mr. 24% happy while he extends a hearty “F you” to Senate Democrats, the Democratic party, and now the vast majority of Americans who are begging congress to do something — to do anything — to stop this tyrannical lunatic before it’s too late to save our country.

It is outrageous that Senators Clinton, Obama and Biden are asking for our votes, but are unwilling to provide leadership now. If they won’t stand up for the principles we all hold dear when they’re trying to earn our votes, how can we expect them to do it once they’re in the White House? Leadership is doing the right thing when it’s risky and when it’s unpopular. (And how depressing is it that upholding your oath of office is risky and unpopular? How doubly depressing is it that the only people who think that — and the only people being listened to — are Joe Klein, the DLC consultants, and the rest of the pundit class?)

Well, as a complete idiot once said: Fool me once, can’t get fooled again.

John Edwards has inspired the hell out of me with his message of hope for America, but Chris Dodd has shown real leadership on one of the most serious issues we’ve faced lately with telco immunity. While the other Senators have talked a good game, Senator Dodd actually did something when his country needed him.

I wanted to share my letter to him here, in the hopes that somehow it will find its way into his hands.

Dear Senator Dodd,

I doubt you’ll get to see this personally, as you’re very busy campaigning and defending our constitution from, well, everyone in government, it seems.

I hope a staffer will convey my immense gratitude — not only as a Democrat but as an American — to you for respecting your oath of office, and standing up to defend the very values that have made America great.

I sent e-mails and I made phone calls yesterday, but you stood up on the floor of the Senate and did something no other Democratic candidate for president seems to be willing to do: you were a leader. You stood not only with the base of our party, but with the vast majority of Americans who want the recklessness of this lawless president brought to a halt.

Your real leadership has inspired me and many others I know who have lost faith in our government, but especially in the Democratic party.

Best of luck to you in the primaries, and thank you for restoring a little bit of my faith in America.

Sincerely,

Wil Wheaton

Pasadena, CA

early morning conversations with my brain

Posted on By Wil

Right around five this morning, some animals decided to throw a screaming, raging, howling party in my backyard . . . with serious emphasis on the screaming and howling.

My dogs must have thought it was a great party, because they both joined in the howling. For maximum fun, they added some of their own barking and yelping, so I would wake up, see what I was missing, and let them run out there to join in the fun.

Yeah. That wasn’t going to happen, so I got up, calmed them down, and hopped back into my nice warm bed to sleep for another three hours.

Yeah. That wasn’t going to happen either. As soon as my head hit my pillow, I had the following conversation:

My brain: Hey, are we awake?

Me: We were, but now we’re going back to sleep.

My brain: Dude! We’re totally awake! Awesome! Weee!

Me: Quiet, you. I’m going back to sleep.

My brain: Okay, but before you go back to sleep, listen to me for a minute. While you were sleeping, I totally came up with this idea for the manga script you’re supposed to be writing.

Me: I’m very proud of you. Let’s talk about it in a few hours. After I wake up for real.

My brain: But it’s so cool! Okay, here’s what happens . . .

Me: SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!

My brain: It’s due in 11 days, dude. I think you should just get up and start writing.



Me: It’s . . . [look at the clock] 5:13 in the morning, dude! It’s still dark.

My brain: Okay. If you really want to sleep, go ahead. I’ll be here when you wake up.

Me: Thank you.

30 seconds later . . .

My brain: ‘”I’m a cowboy! On a steel horse I ride! I’m wanted (wanted!) Dead or alive! Bow wow wow woooowwwwww.”

Me: What. Are. You. Doing.

My brain: I sing to myself when I can’t sleep.

Me: But . . . Bon Jovi? Really?

My brain: Hey, maybe you should play less Rock Band.

Me: I hate you.

My brain: As long as you’re awake, why don’t you get out of bed and write down this awesome story idea I have? It’ll be fun!

Me: I’m going to kill you with so much Arrogant Bastard tonight.

My brain: Yay! Everyone wins!

I got out of bed. The house was cold and dark, and my Macbook’s screen hurt my eyes when I woke it up, but I sat down at the dining room table, and worked on my script for the next four hours.

This is how I know I’m a writer.