My plans to spend last night with the Basic D&D Dungeon Master's Booklet were derailed when I got a late-afternoon phone call from my manager.

"You have a pilot audition tomorrow," he said. "I'm sending you all the material right now."

He described the show to me; it sounds very cool. He described the character to me; it became apparent that this is a guy I could easily bring to life.

"This is awesome," I said. "I'll let you know how it goes."

I spent the evening preparing the audition, and finally went to sleep when I felt like I had a good handle on the material. I woke up this morning feeling excited, and ready to go nail this.

I went over the material* again, put on a tie (the character's a doctor) and grabbed my wallet, keys, iPod and phone. As I jammed all that stuff into my pocket, I heard my phone make the "hey, guess what? My battery is about to die" noise.

"Crap," I said to Anne, "my phone is going to die."

"Why don't you just take it with you and leave it off? You can turn it on in case there's an emergency."

"Nah," I said, "I'll just leave it here and charge it while I'm gone. I hardly ever need it, anyway."

You know what comes next, right?

This is the part where, if this were a movie, we would cut to me, sitting in traffic on the freeway. I'm not moving. There is a shot through my windshield of a bunch of emergency vehicles about a mile ahead of me, and a matching shot of me looking concerned. The next several shots would cut between me and the clock in my car, as it gets closer and closer to my audition time, and then passes it. Repeated over this, my voice says, "I hardly ever need it, anyway … anyway … anyway … now batting … Manny Mota … Mota … Mota …" Finally, about 30 minutes after I'm supposed to be in Hollywood, and still at least 45 minutes away, I creep past the crash, hope that nobody was hurt, and wonder what the hell I'm going to do now. You can't just show up for an audition 90 minutes late without calling.

"Well, fuck." I said. I got off the freeway, turned around, and went home.

It totally sucks that this is the first pilot audition I've had in over a year, and everything that could have gone wrong on the way did.

This show looks great, and the character is absolutely one I can see myself playing for five years or more. I'm hopeful that they're seeing people late into the afternoon or early
evening today, or that there's another session I can go to. This time, I'll bring my cell phone with me, just in case.

Edited to add: Well, this worked out okay after all. I'm going back at noon tomorrow. Yay!

*The material was wonderful, and showed many different sides of this character. This seems like a no-brainer, but you'd be shocked to learn how many auditions feature scenes that tell us nothing about the character, and are little more than that horrible exposition all actors hate to say.