There are less than 12 hours left in the year, according to what my friend calls the arbitrary meridian that sweeps across the planet. I want to be playing RC Pro-Am on my RetroPie right now, but since I committed to a post a day this month*, wrapping it up with a look back at the year seems like a good use of my time.
Instead of looking back at all the terrible things that happened in 2016, I’m going to focus on the good things that happened this year, because to be honest, 2016 and its election of a fucking Fascist can fuck off and die in a fire.
I successfully rebooted my life. I’m healthier and more productive than I’ve been in years, and the minimal sacrifices and difficult changes I made to accomplish the things I wanted to accomplish have been entirely worth it.
I rebooted myself because I was existentially unhappy most of the time, and couldn’t figure out precisely why I felt so frustrated and unfulfilled in a life that was, by all objective measurements, very good. It took most of the year and a lot of commitment through a lot of challenges to realize that I was unhappy and unfulfilled because I had wandered away from the Art (yes, with a capital A) that has always been such a fundamental part of my life.
I’ve struggled with this a lot during my life. I didn’t choose to be an actor, and I don’t know if I would have chosen to be an actor if given the opportunity. It was a thing that my parents wanted me to do, and because like most kids I wanted my parents to be happy, I did it to the best of my ability. I honestly can’t say, and I don’t think I’ll ever know, if I stuck with it because I loved it, or because it was all I really knew how to do, or if it was the only thing I was good at that (and I often feel like I’m worst at what I do best). I still don’t know, and I imagine that I’ll continue to struggle with that question.
But doing this reset and taking this honest and clear look at my life revealed that I love creating, I love telling stories, and I love entertaining. I’m 44 now, and maybe I’ll never get the chance to be the actor I could have been if I hadn’t gotten bad advice and gone from Stand By Me to a shitty horror movie to a TV show and never back to important, dramatic films. Maybe I never had what it takes to be the actor River Phoenix was, or maybe I do and I’ll never get a chance to find out.
I see that, in the effort to share some answers, I’ve uncovered more questions. Great.
Staying focused on the good things: I found the confidence to write the things I needed to write, so I could write the things I had to write, so I could write the things that I wanted to write.
I wrote a whole bunch of short stories that will be published as a collection next year.
I started writing a short story that became a novella that still wants to be a novel that’s almost done.
I wrote a children’s book about a magical farting unicorn that’s awaiting illustration so I can publish it next year.
I designed a world with my son, and set a story inside of it that ended up being one of the most popular webseries I’ve ever done.
I spoke to a university audience about bullying. I spoke to the USA Science and Engineering Festival about the importance of art in science. I spoke to MENSA about being a nerd with depression.
I didn’t do much on-camera acting of consequence (and I don’t know if I ever will get the opportunity — this is clearly something I’m struggling with a lot and will continue to struggle with) but I did a lot of voice acting that I’m super proud of.
I fell back in love with Star Wars.
I went to Scotland with Anne, and we had an adventure.
Anne and I celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary. Fun fact: we actually met exactly 21 years ago tonight.
But the best thing that happened, the thing that makes 2016 something I won’t want to forget ever happened: My son got married, and I love his wife as much as I love him. My family grew this year in an awesome way and I couldn’t be happier about that.
*It’s accepted as fact that daily posting increases audience and reach for a blog. So I wondered if daily posting in December would do that. Maybe December isn’t the best month to try this, because people are busy with holiday things, but my stats indicate that overall views increased a little over twice what they were last month, but are below the average for the first quarter of the year. Daily views increased by about fifty percent over last month, but did not get close to where they were at the beginning of the year. I have no idea what this means, but if I was doing this to specifically build audience or grow reach, I’d consider it a failure. Because I was doing it just to give myself something to do and make posting less precious, though, I’m glad I did it.
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I wonder if your stats count those who read this in email only and don’t click through to the blog. That’s how I mostly read your verbage. I’m looking forward to your collection!
Last year I got a new titanium hip and learned how to walk again. Now it’s 2017 with all it’s uncertainties and I think your reboot is something I want to co-opt for myself. I don’t drink alcohol or eat out at all but I do eat too much carbs and sugar. I can change that. I don’t exercise enough and I can change that.
I need to journal again.
Hopefully seeing how much you are happy with what you have done in a year, and barring a different kind of political dumpster fire that makes my anxiety go Dragon on me again, I can achieve in another year a semblance of happiness as you have.
Peace! (first I typed Peach instead of Peace, wonder if I just should have left it…)
Good point I also read it in the Email only. If this affects things let us know and we’ll read the bog.
Maybe I am dense or missed something but what is this most popular web series? I am thinking Titan’s Grave but if not I would like to know what he is referencing so I can check it out.
another e-mail reader here. Apparently I’m not the only one that came over specifically to tell you that 😉
You can change the email setting to add a “read more,” to the end of 55 words. That way everyone has to click to your blog. See my comment below about the Reader. I talked to a WP Happiness Engineer about it.
I like that Wil tried to keep focused on his goals. I agree, Anna-Marie, that through his ‘reboot’ or change of lifestyle we see that can try too.
My major goal was to pay attention to daily activities and be in the moment. I found I was a calmer person and kept thinking “This is the day I…” and then just do it. And it didn’t matter that some things didn’t go the way I wanted. I would just work around it. And yup, I did have a few “Well that’s fucked!” moments. There is no GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS. Just today. Hope each day is a good one for you all!
Thank you for being you, and sharing parts of your life and enthusiasms with us, Wil. We all need to look out for each other in the coming years, and ourselves. You help people do that, a lot.
If the value of your blog is measured in eyeballs, and comments, and shares, it is probably a shitty blog. Writing for your audience rarely yields good writing, or interesting content. Writing for yourself, and sharing what is important to you, is what makes good writing.
Those blogs that have the biggest impact on how I see the world (this list includes yours), are infrequent, and more precious for being so. The feeling I get from the rare post is that this was something the author could not keep to themselves. The passion and insight is palpable, and it makes me excited for the thing they are talking about, even if I had never heard of it before.
Post every day. Post every week. Post every month. Just do not give up on sharing your world.
I’m with you about 2016 being over. But I appreciate the recap of the positive things that happened. I need to do that.
I do have two questions –
1) Do you like the Star Trek Schematic Illuminated Display? I see it in your picture here. It is very tempting.
2) Do you look at stats from subscribers via email? I find that I’m reading your posts mainly in my email so I wonder how many others do the same and if that impacts page hits. I’m not much of a commenter, this being an exception.
I wish you and your family, now larger, a great 2017.
The display is really neat. It’s smaller than I expected (about the size of a netbook computer) but it’s beautifully etched and the LEDs are pretty.
I haven’t checked the email stats in a long time, but last time I did, they were about 1/5 of what the site records directly.
I read via rss, so my stats may not come through with the core stats :/
Wil, I’m glad you did it too. I’m older than you, and have been following you off and on since you resurrected your presence. I’ve enjoyed your writing and work (miss Eureka). I take some nerd pride in seeing what you’ve overcome. I’ll tell you that directly next time you’re at Emerald City Comicon or PAX Prime (yes, a hint).
I’m with AnnaMarie; I get most of your writing through email. So to the extent you’d like your words out there (which you should), keep that part up.
Best wishes, and hopes, for the new year. Congrats to the newlyweds.
2016 can burn…however – I think it did challenge us in ways that will pay dividends in 2017 and beyond. Given a collective shift from stumbling around in the dark and working harder than we imagined to get anything done, to having clear purpose and easy sailing (which I’ve seen from others, felt myself, and to which you allude) – the aggregate efforts of millions of people in the coming year will moot most, if not all the election results will throw at us.
11 hours into the New Year and the world is still here. A very good idea to dwell on the positives of the past year, it makes the future seem bearable. Here’s to us all being hale, hearty and still here in another year to celebrate the positives of 2017.
I really enjoy your blog Wil. I almost never click through to the site, though, when I read blogs in Feedly. I don’t know how rss aggregators count in your stats, for those of us still using them.
Thank you for this post Wil. It was an excellent reminder that I haven’t been happy at what I have been ding as well. Congrats on your son’s marriage, was it Nolan or Ryan? How awesome that you love his partner. One positive thing that happened to me in 2016 was that I rediscovered your blog. I hope you keep writing, you’re good at it 🙂 ~Rayanne Stemmler
Thank you so much Wil! In so many ways you have inspired me to make changes in my own life. I appreciate the time and efforts you spend here, letting us all into your life. I am so excited to be able to read the stories you will be publishing in 2017
Today’s post lifted me up. Thank you
I brought home all the 2016 calendars from work so I can literally set fire to them.
I still have no voice from laryngitis, which is annoying because my brother will be here in an hour (visiting from NYC) and I only get to see him like twice a year. Alice choked on her lunch today and I got to use some flipping kid upside down and whack on the back first aid skills. A heart attack I’d like not to repeat. Sheesh.
Like I said elsewhere, this year was hard. My cat died, my favorite sitter moved to Ohio, my best friend moved to New Jersey, multiple car, mower and plumbing problems to deal with, anxiety that has appeared and is making life hard, and a surgery for the husband, but there was some good. We took our first family vacation to California and loved seeing our family there. We got to travel more, in Michigan, Canada, New Orleans… We got to spend a ton of time playing outside this summer and at our neighborhood pool.
I hope 2017 is great. Election years are always tough for some reason. Thanks for your December daily, see you next year.
Wil, please know that you are the kind of person I aspire to grow up to be.
I found your blog this year and it was probably one of the best things that happened in 2016. Also thanks for doing this “daily december” it’s been one of the lighlights of my days.
Going to bring all that i’ve learned and all the good things that have happened from this year with me and try to make 2017 as good as possible.
I wish you all the best, you’re amazing!
One good thing that you left out is how much you helped people on a one-to-one basis this year. I was lucky enough to benefit from your kindness when you too the time to say goodbye to me at the airport after the cruise this year. I still remember this short encounter whenever I feel sad. Thank you Wil!
Thank you for sharing your struggles and triumphs, you show us that we’re not as alone as we sometimes feel.
Awesome accomplishments Wil! Let me list mine… I stayed employed. Umm, yeah, that’s it. Next year I plan on rebooting my health. I’ve got a sedentary job (I work on remote computers and sit behind a desk for too many hours each day), and my blood pressure is too high, and I’m about 60 lbs. over weight. I’m not going to promise to get all fit and healthy in 2017, but I sure am going to try! I signed up for the #walk1000miles2017 challenge from Country Walking magazine, and I plan to exceed that 1000 miles by this time next year.
Good luck in 2017!
Thanks for doing this all December Wil, it gave me something to look forward to during a pretty shit month for me.
Happy New Year’s Eve Wil! This has been an awful year for my family with my dad’s passing, my husband’s 2 spine surgeries and my 6 month long running injury. To top it off with this not my president election and the way too many sudden deaths of people I admire, it has been almost too much to take in. But as I am a 67 year old grandmother, I see a lot of hope and possibilities in my cute little 1 year old grandson which helps a lot. I especially appreciated all your venting to help get me through this insane election. You said things I couldn’t but I sure thought them and your words made me feel much better so thanks for helping me get through it. I also read you through email which seems easier for me. I grew up on Trains, Disney, Star Trek, Star Wars, and running (7 years ago). I’m not your normal 67 grandmother and never want to be. You’re right! It does help to follow your passions!!
on a personal level this year well second half as in after october has been wonderful for me things are finally coming together. yet I feel like i can’t fully enjoy it because it seems like we’re on the brink of an apocolypse. I got a cat, she’s awesome and i was semi suicidal when i got her, which was the end of august, but once I got her i was like well if i die there’s no one to take care of her, which might seem dumb to some but not to me. Of course i did consider pissing someone off but making them promise to find her a good home, but i suck at pissing people off irl, online excellent at it. not to mention if i actually managed to piss someone off that much i’d feel horrible because i’d also destroy their lives and that’s not fair. no matter how much i dislike them. I was and still am seeing a therapist and psychiatrist but didn’t tell them i was having those thoughts, because even though my psychiatrist says i won’t necerely go to the hospital for it, I don’t trust that.
I’m finally making friends and tomorrow we’re doing a brunch/tabletop game/cocktail party which most of the prep stuff is done. tonight because i need something low key i’m going to see the new jackie kennedy movie and going to dinner with a friend was gonna go to the casino because her dad’s a hardcore black jack player and gets free rooms down there to see fireworks. but they got cancelled, and i’m glad because i actually don’t really like casinos and hate fireworks.
I think when the world is going to shit looking at whatever good one has in life no matter how minor keeps one for going completely insane, not saying you should ignore the problems and be optimistic about things that realistically aren’t going to be optimistic. I choose not optmism nor pessimism but more i wouldn’t say realism but i’m not going to lie to myself and pretend something is going to be wonderful when it’s likely not because i feel 5 times worse when i get my hopes up.
It’s really funny how small details can make a difference. I usually read your posts via RSS (I know, might be the last one to use that technology to follow blog posts). I haven’t been taking the time to read your posts lately, mostly a few here or there. I think I started slowing down at the same time that your updates started getting a little further apart.
Anyways, the picture you posted made me want to read the first paragraph. And then, you mentioned RC Pro-Am and I was hooked! I find it funny because I was drawn by the two “negative” points of your post: 1. You talk about how acting was not something you wanted to do, but it was something you did because your parents wanted you to. 2. Your only mention of RC Pro-Am was how it was a distraction from your goals to be more creative.
Getting to the point, I always find your blog posts inspirational. This one is no exception. I think it’s great that you’ve successfully followed your objectives and you keep doing so on a daily basis. I also find it interesting the approach you take when you reminisce on your time acting. I can’t help but being reminded that I only first discovered your blog because I used to watch The Next Generation as a kid. Without that part of your life, many people might never have known you…
I wish you the best of luck in the coming year and hope you keep the happiness you have in your life.
Please keep creating in every way you like. You are a wonderful writer and I look forward to you pending books. I loved Titan’s Grave and I have loved Table Top. I hope there is another year but if you feel it is not creative fun to produce, let it go and rejoice in what you have accomplished.
I always wonder if the fact that I use Feedly as a blog aggregator actually counts as views. Without an aggregator, I know I’d miss a lot of stuff, but for anyone who counts on page views for ad revenue, I want them to get credit.
I read on RSS (Feedly) and I don’t think that shows up on your stats either. I occasionally come to the site when I want to comment like now, but even though I rarely come to the site, I read every post you write.
Congrats on 21 years with Anne. Congrats on making it through the dumpster fire that was 2016 (5 more hours from this side of the country, so fingers crossed). And thanks for being you, Wil.
When I graduated college I took a job in a publishing company because they were the first company that wanted to hire me. “Just until I find something I really want to do.” Then they gave me a big raise. “Just until I find something I really want to do.” Another raise. (This was in the late 80s when we were tripping over money.) Turns out, more than half my coworkers were in the same boat. We didn’t want to do what we were doing. We weren’t fulfilled but, every time we came close to leaving, we’d get another raise. Then we were Reorganized. For most of us, it was the best thing that ever happened. We had a little financial cushion and time to think. I hope you find an answer to your acting career questions.
WordPress got rid of a the “read more” in the Reader, so users can read the entire post without clicking to our blogs. We don’t get a hit or view when they read either. It’s such a bummer. Everyone’s views must be down. Mine are. I just pad the total in my head. 🙂
Happy 2017!
Good luck with 2017, Wil. I think I’ll leave it at that for tonight. Just got home from finally seeing Doctor Strange…and that’s wrapping up my movie-watching for this year.
I always thought you were a very good actor, and I absolutely felt you tapped a fantastic character in Big Bang Theory, I think you have a good range of acting skills. I’d like to see you more in a slightly evilish role, or something akin to that. Don’t give up, you may not become lead status, but I think there are still roles out there for you that you can make a decent living and fulfil that creative outlet.
The daily posts have been great. This year, your life reboot has been especially inspirational. Maybe in 2017, I will manage to follow your example and stick with a reboot myself.
Regarding stats, I’ve always appreciated that you write for yourself and so honestly, rather than chasing views/audience. For me, that independence, along with the quality of your writing, has been one of the best things about your blog.
Thumbs up all around Wil. And a sincere thank you. I know you’ve heard this before, but hearing your story helped me seek help with my depression, and I’ve been rooting for your reboot right alongside everyone else. I’m so happy it’s been a success for you! I enjoy every single one of your posts, and I look forward to reading more of your printed/published work in 2017. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Hello, Wil! Your stats comment brought me here. I get your posts via email, so I rarely visit the site itself. Do the stats account for that? I thoroughly enjoyed Daily December! Happy New Year!
Thanks for your recap of the good things that happened with you in 2016. We are sooo DONE with this year, but the good memories deserve to be honored properly. Your Daily December has been enjoyable to read, and it reminds me that for those of us for whom writing is A Thing, writing EVERY DAY is crucial. I think you’ve inspired a new habit for which to aspire in my life. Rebootie thingy, here I come! 😀
Thank you, too, for sharing your struggles so honestly, including the anger. It reminds me that even the ugly, unpleasant emotions have their reason for being; feeling them, accepting them, and then letting them go is the proper way to deal with them. I’m also grateful for even having the feelings, since depression tends to wipe the emotions away altogether. You’ve done good work in this for all of us to see, and from which to take example. You are a valued tribe member.
I’m glad you can see thru the muck enough to focus on the positive. Your posts are much better when you do not focus on political bs. In 2016, you helped a lot of people out including myself when I was down and out about having to put my cat to sleep. I’m still really sad about it, and 100 times a day I am reminded of him by things around the house. I first found your blog with your posts about anxiety and depression, and your posts forced me to accept that I suffer from these also, and have for many years (I’m 56). I have come to realize that my problems in this area were caused by severe RLS which I have suffered with since I was a teenager, and which has evolved into chronic insomnia. I am working on it. I guess we’re all a work in progress.
Wil, thank you. I enjoy your shows, I enjoy your acting, I enjoy your stories, and I enjoy your daily emails (blog). I hope sincerely that you find the happiness in 2017 we all feel you deserve. Thanks, mon Capitan.
Wil, I’ve been reading your blog all through this year, and it has been everything from enlightening to inspiring to overwhelming to funny to sad to so many different ideas and feelings I am often moved and affected when I read it. Thank you for being willing to be yourself here. You are just super cool!!
William Christopher AKA “Father Mulcahy” among many roles on TV and in the theatre, who IRL was a direct descendant of Paul Revere, a generous benefactor of autism research, and an advocate for raising awareness of the importance of empathy, human interaction, and personal care in the healthcare profession – just passed away. R.I.P.
I hope this is 2016’s parting vaffanculo, but I’m not saying anymore to tempt it, as there is still half an hour remaining.
Just wanted to let you know I’m super happy I stumbled across your blog and the posts you decided to share with us. They’ve been heartfelt, encouraging, sincere and often they make me think. Like today’s. It’s so easy to look only at the negative and get hooked up on it and forget about the positive which has happened, and after reading today’s post I actually sat a good long while reminiscing about how much has changed to the better, opposed to two years ago when I had hit rock bottom. It’s still a work in progress, and takes effort, and often I feel just so tired and exhausted. But now at least I feel like I’m getting somewhere, even if slowly, in a two steps forward one step (occasionally two, or three steps) back kind of way.
I always look forward to read them when a new header crops up in my reader (I use Feedly btw). I rarely comment, but I’ve been a regular reader since last summer.
Happy New Year to you and your family.
Will, you are an inspiration. Your frankness and honesty is refreshing in this world of spin.
I’m glad you did it too, Wil. I’ve enjoyed checking in with you every day and seeing the eclectic postings. You did good this year.
Wil, please keep on doing what you’re doing. It seems to benefit you and it definitely benefits us. Thanks!
Hey Wil, I always enjoy what you have to say here and your year has really inspired me. And for whatever it’s worth this internet stranger is proud of your progress. I’m a nerd who makes attempts at creative things as well, mostly acting and writing, and your approach has always inspired me to keep at it. So, you keep at it too. You’re doing great. Can’t wait to read your stories. Happy New Year! Thanks for the positivity!
I stumbled back into realizing that Wil Wheaton was on the internets and I did very much need to reconnect with things I used to like. So your posts were a panacea for a crappy fall, and the holiday season that I so dislike.
I’m glad you did it too. Even if I’m the upmteenth person to say that. 😀
I’ve been following your blog ever since you decided to do your reset, and I check in on it often just to see how you’re doing with that. Honestly, I’ve struggled with depression for a good amount of my life, and its managed through medication as well as other things – but your blog, specifically your reset, are just fantastic. Every time I read about the commitment you made to yourself to make your life more of what you wanted, I’m just inspired, and impressed, but mostly encouraged.
“because to be honest, 2016 and its election of a fucking Fascist can fuck off and die in a fire.”
Ha ha ha…well put!!
I love how honest you are about the struggles of existential thinking. I fell into this same rabbit hole after I left my religion and all its dogma behind. After that . . . no answers! Help! Depression followed and still chases in the night. While I bear through with ecstatic pizzazz and vigor, I am changed. We have to talk about this more and I love that you do it with such candor. To a great year! 2017!