I wrote this on my dumb Facebook yesterday:.
At least three blogs linked to my blog about the minifigs today. All three of the ones I saw essentially quoted the entire thing, and then added commentary that misrepresented what I said, and what my intention was when I said it.
Another blog, home to one of the most pathetic, sad, empty, angry, hateful failures in the universe also linked to it.
The resulting flood of toxic and cruel and hateful people into my life has been appalling and revealing.
Unsurprisingly, when a shitty person is shitty, they attract other shitty persons to their blog. When a blog that presents itself as news writes shitty posts that are intended to make shitty people feel better about themselves by attacking and tearing down other people, those sites attract shitty people.
And now a lot of those shitty people are all up in my business. I can ignore a lot of it, and I block and move on, but it’s frustrating and disheartening to see so much hate and cruelty projected from people who I don’t know and wasn’t writing for in the first place. It’s gross and it makes me feel … well, the only word I can come up with is “icky” and that’s not the best word. I just feel like the stink of toxic, terrible people is around me today, and it makes me grateful for the millions of you out there who are not that, who choose to spend a little bit of time in the same virtual space as me.
Dickheads are gonna be dickheads, and I have to be better at just ignoring that (Hardwick is the Zen master of this, if you’re looking for inspiration). But those news blogs that reprinted exactly what I wrote, but then recontextualized it (and me) to create a false narrative … that’s frustrating to me. Maybe I wasn’t clear enough in my post, so I left it open to interpretation. Maybe I didn’t make it clear that I was answering a question, sharing a raw and unfiltered emotional response to something, and concluding that I was disappointed. I wasn’t mad, I wasn’t ranting, I wasn’t furious, I didn’t call for a boycott. I just said I was disappointed, and I explained why. I thought I was clear, and I thought it was dispassionate (as much as it can be when it’s talking about something that has been a bit of a raw nerve for thirty years). So if I wasn’t extremely clear, I guess that’s on me.
But I can’t help but feel like these blogs deliberately used sensational language to create a narrative that justified their writers essentially quoting everything I wrote, adding no new information or informed analysis, and collecting the ad revenue. That’s frustrating to me, because they get to move on to their next bit of sensationalized bullshit, while I spend days dealing with the trolling and associated garbage from people who will read their sensationalized headlines, accept their sensationalized framing, and then come after me on social media or in the comments of my own blog. It’s ironic that I had to block some shitty people here, because one of the founding principles of my blog, over ten years ago, was for me to have a place to speak for myself, after a lifetime of being spoken for by publicists. It was to give me a place to set the record straight, after years of being talked about by people who knew little to nothing about me. And here we are, a decade later, and I’m doing the same thing I was back then: speaking up to say, “that’s not what I said, and you know it’s not what I said.” There’s an argument to be made for just ignoring it and moving on, and there’s an argument to be made that I’m doing this all over again ten years later because I’m screwed up, emotionally. Maybe that’s the case. I have to live with this brain that lies to me all the time, and I’m coming off of 24 hours of shitty people telling me to kill myself, so maybe I’m not the most objective observer in this regard.
But all of that is prelude and context to what I hope will be the real takeaway from this stupid thing: I am genuinely grateful that I interact with kind and good people in real life and online almost every day. I am grateful that we work with intention to create a positive and uplifting place when we are together, and I am grateful that, even when I was a shitty teenager, I never would have wanted to be around cruel, unhappy, nihilists who have little to no empathy in their lives, and use anger to give their lives meaning.
Thanks for listening.
Note: Because I’m dealing with trolls and dickweeds right now, I’ve set comments to go into moderation, unless you have a previously-approved comment. Thanks for understanding.
Wil,you are a kind and funny person – I enjoy what you do, write and perform.
I wish you all the best for 2018
Greetz from Germany
I agree.
I honestly don’t know how people, like yourself, in the media eye deal with all the hate and vitriol. It’s all such ugly cowardice. Stay strong, Wil. You’ve got friends on your side, and maybe one day, when internet freedom isn’t such a new thing, the trolls will diminish. As always, I appreciate and enjoy your posts.
Wil,
Love you, brother. The internet is a hateful place, and I know as a non-famous person it’s easy for me to say… disregard it. You’re better than all of it, and I’m sure my fellow fans here agree. I know I said it in a different comment, but I LOVE LOVE the idea of a Trek show with you playing the captain (Maybe being a Traveller was just a sabbatical from the Academy?)!
Also, your appearance on @midnight with Marcella Arguello (sorry, can’t remember the third person) was absolutely hysterical. I miss that show too, but at least I get some Hardwick on Talking Dead.
Take care of yourself.
Wil, Thank you for sharing. In recent months, I’ve really started to question the impact that social media (looking at you Facebook) is having on the basic ways in which we communicate with one another. This feels like yet another example of people trying to fill there lives with some sense of satisfaction drawn from page views at the expense of other people’s feelings and emotions.
I love technology, but more and more, I see it bringing out the worst in people.
Please keep doing what you do knowing that there are those of us who find inspiration in your words, enjoy your writing and creativity as well the parts of your life you choose to share with us, and just plain like you.
Wil’s first ~250 words speak volumes, and, sadly, are an insightful assessment of the current state of (internet) humanity …
I was not a rabid TNG fan, but the episodes I saw were pretty good. But I don’t recall Wesley ever whimpering, sobbing, and certainly not full-on wailing as depicted in the minifig.
Sure, Wesley was sometimes confused, disconcerted, even worried. As is virtually every teenager (or other human being) struggling to make sense of the world. Or the GALAXY.
Wesley stood in for all of us at some point in our lives. And perhaps the occasional day, even now.
I hate to use the word ‘haters,’ (see what I did there?), but. Those piling on to this so-called controversy are simply projecting their own sense of confusion, disconcertion, and worry. Just like they did in the third grade.
And though its not always easy, Wil seems to recognize this …
Wil, my friend tweeted a story to you the other day about my phone accidentally playing the recording of Armada at a Dollar General checkout. That incident turned into a 15 minute conversation with the cashier about everything from how much we love your voice work to your fantastic character in Eureka. Please know that no matter how much vitriol is flung at you online, there are thousands of conversations happening around the country about how much we have enjoyed your work. And also know that your work, and even just these conversations make our lives so, so much better.
Wil, Thank you for the blog and for you I have a quote, “How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours. Wayne Dyer”, It is most appropriate to think about this at times like this. I wish you the all the best and hope your new year is the best and getting better. Thanks for the entertainment over the years.
I thought you did a really good job in the first blog of NOT being negative, Wil. But haters gonna hate, or whatever. I’m sorry you’re having to deal with them. I wish I could magic it away. But until I get my letter from Hogwart’s (still waiting), all I can say is:
Hang in there. You’re doing just fine.
I’m not sure why it has never hit me before, just how hard it must be to have to deal with depression while people drag you into the spotlight just to shit on you. I’ve always been inspired by your perseverance through depression, it has been an encouragement when I struggle. This story just hit me with how much more you face, how much more impressive your continuing struggle is.
It sucks that people are shitty. But, thank you for sharing your life with us. Thank you for sharing your creativity. Thank you for being a voice about the truth and difficulty of depression and for being an advocate for mental heath. Although we have never met you, there are countless people out here in the world who love what you do, and who you are.
Dickheads gonna dickhead. Thank you for being you.
You spoke very clearly and I’m sorry that shitty people are shitty. I was annoyed when I saw how they portrayed Wesley in the minifigs. My son is a big fan of yours and I would have loved to get him a minifig. Sadly whoever made it completely disregarded everything that WC had to go through and deal with in the series and chose to make fun of a character that has shown my son (a 10 year old science lover that wants to be a chemist), that no matter how old you are, you can use your knowledge to change the universe (and show up some adults while your at it…..totally humbly).
He’s new to TNG but has been a fan of yours since his first episode of Table Top. I now have more board games than I know what to do with. He always wants to play what you’ve played. (also he’s never laughed harder than when your wife accidentally knocked down all the trains in Ticket-to-Ride) And he just finished listening to Ready Player One and informed me that he pictures “A little Wil Wheaton running around doing all the actions.”
I tell you all of that because I want you to know that you and Wesley Crusher still inspire people young and old. Those idiots with their shitty blogs and even worse attitudes will never take that away.
Thank you for you.
Hey Wil, thank YOU for always being open, and honest, and yourself. I for one thought your post about the minifigs was perfectly clear, and it certainly wasn’t a rant (and even if it had been, I figure you’re allowed to rant on your own blog about people shitting on a widely-beloved character you helped create). I’m so sorry people have twisted your words, and that arseholes are coming after you again. You don’t deserve that. I hate that we live in a society that seems so determined to be nasty all the time. I hope something nice happens to cancel out the bad stuff, and that you feel better soon.
Wesley seemed self-assured and naive: like EVERY teenage boy. If anything aside from a realistic visage of your face, it should have had an “Oooh! Neat! Wow!”-face. Sorry that trolls will be trolls though. You’re awesome, Wesley was awesome, and should have become a recurring character throughout the Star Trek-verse popping in an out as the new Traveler.
There is a simple explanation for your recent troubles with the bloggers. Some persons are calloused & possess an almost unbelievable ability to misread what is actually said & to assign (bad) motives to others. The world is harsh & we humans have not learned to self govern, to be efficient, or to love each other properly. Being disliked & criticized by some persons is much better than being praised by those persons. What they said. is blah bah blah. I lurk & read your posts. Lots of people do & you have helped & you do help others by your being genuine & open. Lots of those persons will never leave a comment but your posts have left a positve mark on others.E
I just came across this on another blog. I am sorry to hear about the *&^% people that are bothering your. And I wanted to tell you how much I ENJOYED Wesley Crusher’s character on TNG (and I cannot imagine TNG without him). Thanks for your excellent work on that show!
A lot of people suck. Thanks for being one of the ones that don’t. Don’t let the bastards wear you down.
Like many above, I just wanted to post real quick to say how much I appreciate your dialogue with “us” over the years. Although I know it is an illusion, your posts and commentary make me feel a little like we know each other, that we’re friends. It’s a privilege to get to share in your thoughts and observation, free of PR polishing or political wrangling. What you choose to share, I feel, helps reinforce that sense of connection that I appreciate. We’re close to the same age, and, to be honest, I’ve often “acted vicariously” through you. I never made the sacrifices and did the work necessary to be cast on Eureka, but you were there, so I could imagine what it might be like to be there. I didn’t pay my dues to get voice acting work, but, when hearing you, I think “he gets to do that cool job and work with those awesome people. And I read his posts and tweets – in a way, I’m part of that cool work… Supporting it, anyway.” I feel I may be rambling so I’ll close out with thanks, again.
It’s such bullshit. When I saw the picture of the minifigs I just thought – what bullshit.
I am about 3 years younger than you. I loved Wesley growing up. I didn’t even know I was supposed to hate him until people told me so.
Screw them. They’re just mean.
Wil,
No matter the intention nor the amount of effort you have put into something like this… It comes down to the sad truth that there will always people in this world that want to see others fail and suffer. Unfortunately there is a compounding element for some of us, this is an internal monologue of similar negativity. In both cases, I’ve found that it’s rarely actually about you, what you said or did. It’s about them, and how they cope with the world. But that sadly leaves a lot of damage in the wake that we must now endure, which you articulated quite well… They move on to the next thing while you’re left with the aftermath.
I don’t have a solution, especially when you’re dealing with people you may not have had a relationship before and would not again.
If nothing else, this is me telling you that there are others like you in this world and empathize with your frustrations. Sadly, this will happen again, but hopefully lessons learned here might make it more manageable next time. We can’t change the world, but we can control how much we let it affect us.
Stay strong.
Sorry people give you crap about Wesley. There are lots of people out there, like me, who loved him. Those people are unlikely to comment on an internet blog – this is the first time I ever have. But we’re out here.
Sheesh, late to the party as usual, but what a pile of crap. The wilful ignorance and belligerence of segments of the online world never ceases to amaze and disappoint. Keep on keeping on, Wil, nobody who matters listens to a word of that kind of distorted, vindictive drivel.
Hey there, Wil. I’ve been a fan of your work for many years now, both as a Trekkie and as a table top gaming aficionado. We have never interacted online. So, imagine my surprise when I find out that somehow, for some reason, you blocked me on Twitter. Something I wouldn’t have noticed save for another tweet bringing attention to being blocked by you.
My only guess is, because at one point I clicked “Follow” on Dave Rubin, a liberal who has fallen out with the far left in the last few years. Or perhaps some other public figure I decided to follow? It’s hard to say for sure.
I just wanted to register my disappointment at your choice to, I assume, mass block people on the internet for the “crime” of association (if clicking the follow button on social media could even be considered association). I’ve decided to take the hint, however, and divest myself of your further creative endeavors. Seems like that’s what you’d prefer.
Sincerely,
A Former Fan
Well it was probably a false positive, which happens from time to time. You could ask me to take a look, which I’d be happy to do, or you could jump to a conclusion and write a passive aggressive screed on my blog about it.
Wil, you’re awesome! Don’t let anyone bring you down with trivial things. Me and my kids love you and your work. We’re familiar with your work on Stand by Me, Star Trek TNG and Big Bang Theory. If anyone reaches out in a negative way, then I would delete their comments… including these condescending action figures. You are loved. 🙂
Wil, i think it’s awesome that Wesley Crusher existed. And I agree, it was unreasonable to mar an otherwise nice set of minifigs with their obviously personal opinions regarding the character of Wesley Crusher.
I’m just re-watching TNG now because when it aired I was busy with stuff and only caught an episode now and then.
There was some really great acting in that series and we did get to see Wesley grow.
I agree with you, it was an inspiration to young people.
And there are so many haters out there… just thought I’d let you know, i just found your website and I’m enjoying your perspective quite a bit.
I was just a kid when the Original Star Trek aired. It changed me. It made being a nerd less difficult, which I was even then, even though the word hadn’t been invented yet.
Good for you Wil. It’s important people stand up for common decency on the internet. My wife is a content moderator and it’s when people like you highlight the issues and take action that things improve. I know this was a personal circumstance but the principle still stands.
Now I’m curious whether I have ever had an approved comment.
“… or you could jump to a conclusion and write a passive aggressive screed on my blog about it.”
That is priceless. There are billions of people in the world and some people think they are more than just a bit of flotsam and jetsam floating by your blog or twitter feed not really impacting the world nearly as much as they think.
I was browsing through the comments not knowing what the post was about, and saw a hint that someone out in the world thinks that you are Wesley Crusher, or something, and made fun of you in some stupid way. The internet really is full of crap sometimes, whatever it was that spurred this on.
Your thoughts, which I read just now and then, seem to be rational and well thought out and you seem like a respectable person (from what little a person can know from blog posts and watching a board game YouTube show). If you decide that it’s best for you to mass-block people based on who they follow, that’s your decision. It seems fair enough to me. A few false positives seems like an insignificant price to pay to get rid of a buttload of crap that people probably send your way daily, just because you were on a TV show playing a sometimes dorky and sometimes genius kid, or for something after that of which I know nothing about… except TableTop which I just loved. That show got me into serious board gaming! You made me go out an buy Tokaido! I wish there was more of it.
Anyhow, this random 1-person-in-7.4-billion has no problem with your blocking other people who are equally meaningless as me in your life (or equally meaningful depending on how like to describe things). Some of us are fans and some seem to be haters. But I don’t think that any one of us individually is anything to worry much about. Those close to you are the only people who really matter.
I’m a bit of a fan for some reason. Maybe because you have dealt with stuff that has made many people crumble, falter, give up, or worse. It’s stuff I can’t imagine.