Concrete Jungle

The show last night was really fun. I got to meet lots of Farkers, inluding Drew, who is just a really cool guy.
The show wasn’t my funniest of all time, mostly, I think, because David Carradine had this certain energy that said, “Hey, Wil, just keep your bitch mouth shut, funnyman.” Don’t get me wrong- he was extremely cool, and told great stories. He just wasn’t as easy to joke around with as some of our other guests. It didn’t help that I was really intimidated by him. I mean, Kung Fu for farksakes.
However, I did get some good funny out there. At the beginning of the show Keith and I sit at the desk, and he asks me what I’ve been doing, and I said, “Well, Keith, my wife and kids have been out of town for over a week, which means that I’m living the bachelor life right now.
“And I’ve learned a thing or two this week, while they’ve been gone: I have learned that there is, indeed, such thing as too much Playstation and porn.”
(pause while the audience laughs)
“I mean, goddamn. My hands are KILLING ME! I can hardly get them to work anymore!”
I held up my hands, twisted and contorted into this crazy shape.
People laughed. It was fun.
We had two other guests, who were simply BRILLIANT. Our comedian was Greg Fitzsimmons, who made me laugh until it hurt.
Our musician was an amazing jazz singer, Sandra Booker. I can’t believe that I got to sit on the same stage as her, while she sang. If you like jazz at all, you should check her out.
The coolest thing in the whole show for me, though, was when Keith, Adam, and I had a scatting contest, with Sandra Booker. It was really fun, and I won! (France surrenders.)
After the show was over, I hung with the Farkers for a bit, then headed home, where I stayed up until 4:30 playing GTA 3, completing only 3 missions. Which is the beauty of GTA 3, I think. 🙂
Today, I’m writing more Arena stuff, and working on the Soapbox.
Thought for today:

“The concept of violence is out of date. The destruction of your neighbor is the destruction of yourself.”

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55 thoughts on “Concrete Jungle”

  4. The Kung Fu guy is cool, but I could see how he could be intimidating. I don’t know if I ever remember him smiling. Could just be my C.R.S.

  6. Ok the thing about there being such a thing as too much porn and holding your hands up and twisting them made me fall off my chair from laughing.

  7. David Carradine’s not supposed to be intimidating..remember young grasshoppa:if you need help go to Chinatown, ask for Cain, he will help you. :-

  9. Hey Wil, are you doing shows between May 18 and June 18? Four of us are coming all the way from New Zealand to help Mark Kines (Foreign Correspondents (with Wil, Corin Nemec and Melanie Lynskey (available at Amazon (aaargh, trapped in nested parentheses!)))) make new film and would love to come and see your show.

  10. Yes, I can certainly sympathize with the hand pain. Happened to me many, many times.
    When I first got my Playstation. 😉

  12. Glad you had a good time Wil.
    I have to come and see your shows sometime.
    I am going to bed. My daughter had a softball
    game today and I didn’t know it was going to be 90 degrees. I am got badly sunburned.
    I hurt, Bye!
    Mary Jo

  14. http://www.zentertainment.com/article.php?sid=2846
    Ashley Judd was on Letterman the other night to promote her new movie, High Crimes. Dave surprised her with a clip of her appearance on Star Trek TNG, where she went on a date with Wesley Crusher (Wil Wheaton). Judd mentioned that she was reprising the roll (of Robin Lefler) in Star Trek: Nemesis as Wesley’s wife.
    This true Wil?

  16. Wil won the scatting contest? Good for him! 🙂 I love scatting. My professional background is in Jazz, so I know a thing or two. I like to scat because it’s totally ad lib, and I like to feel what’s going on with the music. I think that the most fun gig I ever did was in London with a jazz band consisting of three elderly gentlemen who had been playing together for 40+
    years. I had never met these gentlemen until I was actually onstage with them. Talk about feeling the music. That was very cool! Sorry, you were saying that you won a scat contest? 🙂

  17. Glad ya hade fun at your show Wil. I wish I could have been there but LA is sooooo far away from where i live. (In the middle of no where.) I really liked the thought for today. It really made me think and i think that’s good. Well hope ya have a good weekend. Peace out.

  18. hey! this web site is addicting. yeah you, the stand by me kid, willy wheatbread…or something. what kind of fiddling around is this? i say, put that GTA3 down this instant young man and hands out of your pants! yaberjabering, heeberjibbering hooligans.

  19. While selfishly smoking a grit and pondering multiple realities I remember an old rumor that Mr Carradine dropped enough acid to cause the “certain energy that said, “Hey, Wil, just keep your bitch mouth shut, funnyman.”
    You’ll have to drop a few of those black pyramids to sync with him, but considering the children I’d advise against it.
    By the way any public figure that admits to his controled (you do have it under control wil, right?) addiction to computer games has to be propped. Long Live Wil!!

  20. U should bring that show to the edinburgh festival. It would be cool and I would only have to trek across one country to see it.
    shaun

  21. I would love to see The J.Keith van stratten show. It sounds really funny. Any talk about getting it on tv? Wil have a good day.

  24. too much fun with yourself and u can go blind.
    my thought for today.
    “do unto others as u would do to yourself”
    or just do it to yourself its more fun.

  26. I can’t see Ashley Judd reprising the role and nothing being said by anyone. And if she did, I don’t think that Wil can say anything about it.
    Contract. Christian, how did your examn go?

  30. Wil, I think working at G4 has made you overlook the obvious: there needs to be a porn PlayStation game.
    Wait, nevermind, then you’d never post anything again. The jury will ignore the previous testimony.
    And of course Wil won the scatting contest. It’s all that scatological humor he does, for fartsakes!
    –NT

  31. Robin Lefler as Robin Crusher?
    I’m scared.
    Granted, her role in that show is one of the only reasons I tolerate her sometimes, but still…
    Good god, where’s Spudnuts when you need him?
    Wait…
    Wesley Crusher: Borg Queen
    Robin Lefler: Borg King? Lackey?
    Hrm.

  32. Oh yeah, and David Carradine always made me want to laugh, because it’s like, here’s whitey being all kung-fu on someone’s ass. This slow-ass old dude, pulling a roundhouse on some dude’s head.
    Maybe it’s just me.

  34. NT, there *is* such a thing as Playstation Porn. You just have to know where to look.
    I mean, heck, the Japanese think of everything. Hentai Playstation games are big biz. Just do a Google search, you’ll see.
    What more does a man need?
    A woman, maybe.

  35. Only 3 missions completed?? Haha, thats pretty bad. One suggestion though, don’t use those cheat codes that get you like a rocket launcher or tank or something, they’re like a crack addiction in that you can’t stand playing the game without them after you try them out. You start running over everything in site blasting it away and killing everyone in site. MUHAHAHA time to go play some GTA 3 🙂

  36. Gta is cool.
    If you want to get creeped out, check out Fatal Frame : Based on a true story.
    It’ll creep you out, especially if you play at night, with all the lights out, and alone.
    Gotta be alone.
    No cheating. =)
    Cool to hear that fun is being had by all, and by you Wil. Take care.

  38. 3 missions!? Just wait… Oh and don’t forget about “hookers and health” (he he…it’s exactly as it sounds, and although it’s sooo wrong…don’t forget to get your money back)
    But what is really cool about GTA is how it allows for a more non-linear approach. Supposed to drive someone off the road? Why not find a rooftop and pick him off with the sniper rifle instead.
    BTW has anyone gotten ALL the police stars?

  43. I’ve been on the Net since, oh, 89, in ST:TNG clubs and mariah-hating clubs and on obsessive REM listserves – quit them all ‘cuz I either grew up or more likely, the community just wasn’t happening. This is one happenin’ community, and I’m finally all grown up. =D SERIOUSLY though is that show on TV anywhere!?!!?!? I’d LOVE to see that!!!!! Tell J.Keith’s producer’s/agent they’re segregating the East-Coasters, dude! We ain’t havin’ none of that!

  44. That was Ashley Judd? I am so out of touch, never made the connection. Sorry to hear about the auditions, but yeah, I think you’re right about the good stuff waiting around the corner, Wil. There’s always a reason…(I think I need to play Good Shit by Cornershop right about now.) And great to see comments up again – hurrah!

  45. Interesting mathematical fact: There can be too much of Playstation AND porn, but seperately, you can have as much as you want of either of them.

  46. “I held up my hands, twisted and contorted into this crazy shape.
    People laughed. It was fun.”
    I seem to have shat myself i laughed so hard

  47. >>>I seem to have shat myself i laughed so hard
    Hehehe. With a name like FigNewton, it’s an interesting visualization.

  48. I have seen you post a hello on others sites..and I was just wondering if you got my insignificant email…? I would love it, and my friends would love it…if you took 45 seconds to say hello on my site.
    🙂
    BTW…YOU ROCK!
    and
    GTA Rules…although I have not played #3 yet

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