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Geek Madness continues, scrabble is played, and the Gabe Bag is packed

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I decided that I would take the week between Christmas and New Year off, but the damn Internets keep pulling me back in!

Various items for today:

Paul and Storm say:

…as the first geek President, Barack Obama would do well to reward this important and influential constituency by creating a new cabinet post: the Secretary of Geek Affairs.

And it’s up to YOU (the collective you, that is) to make sure the right person gets the job. As such we present GEEK MADNESS: a 64-”team” elimination tournament decided by public voting as to which person (or persons), real or fictional, is best for the job.

It’s as much fun to read as you’d think. The four regions have names we all recognize, like the Bombadil and Jor-El Regions, and there are some truly difficult geek match-ups, like Steve Jobs vs. The Cast of Revenge of the Nerds.

Somehow, I got added to this insanity, and I’m in the Jor-El region. Normally I don’t care about this sort of thing, and never take it seriously, but I really like Paul and Storm and I’m totally into the spirit of Geek Madness. Vote early and vote often, my brothers and sisters, and we’ll all celebrate when I get crushered in the second round, provided we can somehow get past Bruce Cambell in the first round. (I know, I know. If you can’t vote for me in this circumstance, I totally understand; I had a hard time voting for me.)

I wasn’t going to write an LA Daily this week, because the Internets seem to be turned off, but my editor told me that traffic is actually up at the Weekly, so I went ahead and wrote a story about playing Scrabble with Anne:

I drew an X. She drew an E. It was an unnecessary harbinger of things to come. She went first, and instantly took a twenty point lead. I scored seven, much better than usual. Four or five turns later, she played SEXY for a triple word score, and I never caught up. It was a blowout. I was Custer at Little Bighorn, Varro at Cannae, The Broncos at Superbowl XXIV.

With about twenty tiles remaining in the bag, I saw a chance to draw within 40 points. I had QIEEB after I’d played an ineffectual two letters for a humiliating three points. If I drew a T, N, or R, I could place the Q on a triple word score, build off the U in FUGUE, and make QUIET, QUEER, or QUEEN.

I drew the T and held my breath, for Murphy’s Law of Scrabble is that, with 85 potential places to play, your opponent will always play in the one place that leaves you thoroughly fucked.

Mike (aka Gabe) says that playing D&D with me and Kurtz and Tycho inspired him to get a DMG and learn how to run a game. They did four comics about it that I absolutely love. (part one – part two – part three – part four) I also love that this comic has given rise to the term the Gabe Bag as in, “I knew it would be a long flight, so I put my DS into my Gabe Bag, but I started reading an ARC of BONESHAKER before take off, and I never took anything else out.”

Mike couldn’t have chosen a better time to start DMing. The Fourth Edition Dungeon Master’s Guide is the book I’ve wanted to read since 1983: instead of just being a collection of magic items and a few passing references to the joys of reading boxed text, it actually teaches the reader how to be a DM. It explains – among several other things – how to figure out what your players want and give it to them, how to create encounters on the fly, how to scale encounters and award XP, and how to bring the game to life off the table, so everyone truly feels like they’re in a town called Winterhaven and maybe it’s not such a good idea to try to bluff that Ranger in the alley after all. The Fourth Edition DMG takes every single thing that makes DMing intimidating and scary, and casts dispel fear on it. Whether you’re planning to run a 4e campaign, a T20 campaign, a GURPS campaign or a World of Darkness campaign, it’s the one book that all hopeful DMs should have, and I think that even experienced DMs will find it a useful and enjoyable read.

So far, the feedback on the audio version of Happiest Days of Our Lives is overwhelmingly positive. Reader Paulius seemed to really like it:

If you’ve ever rolled a D20, stayed up all night mapping out Zelda on the NES or just happen to have heard of Wil Wheaton…buy The Happiest Days of Our Lives audiobook, it’s more than worth it.

Listening to the book was an almost eerie experience. At times I felt like some of Wil’s stories were lifted directly from my own childhood, only with the names and locations changed. I think this is what makes this book so charming…that despite the fact that, like me, you may have grown up a decade and a few thousand miles away from the author…you instantly feel have a lot in common through sheer geek-cameraderie.

I remember standing in a toy store, determined not to leave without a Star Wars action figure like in ‘Blue Light Special’. I remember being ‘taught’ by little-Hitler teachers who were far more interested in petty, selfish power-trips than actual teaching like in ‘The Butterfly Tree’…and sadly, the loss of a beloved family pet almost exactly like “Let go – A requiem for Felix the Bear.”

In fact, to me, that’s almost exactly what this book is. A memoir of the experiences that ‘growing up geek’ brings. The discovery that the things you love deny you entry into the mainstream social circles, the feeling that you have to constantly defend your choice of hobbies, and the joy when you find someone else who feels the same way. After listening to the whole thing, I almost can’t help but think of Wil’s childhood recollections as ‘Geek-Seed Moments’…those formative childhood experiences that steer you down the road towards geekhood.

Geek-Seed Moments is a phrase that I like a lot. I’m working on a new introduction for the Subterranean Press edition of the book, speaking specifically to people who aren’t already familiar with me and my work, and don’t know what they’re getting into. I keep coming back to various ways of saying that it’s about geek nostalgia with some of the stuff I love thrown in, but the words keep coming out all weird. Maybe “Geek-Seed Moments” will help me put them together into something more satisfying.

Finally: this.

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30 December, 2008 Wil

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the 2008 year in review, part one → ← happy winter festival of your choice

28 thoughts on “Geek Madness continues, scrabble is played, and the Gabe Bag is packed”

  1. Chris Radcliff says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:19 am

    “get crushered in the second round” *eyeroll*
    Seriously, though, we already know you can beat Wesley. It’s Stephen Hawking you should be worried about.

  2. Z says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:22 am

    Vote made. And speaking of voting, is it the inauguration yet damn it?

  3. D.J. Sylvis says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:27 am

    Kick ass! I’m waiting for my Core Rulebooks to arrive as we speak, and I’m going to be DMing for the first time in about fifteen years (though I’ve still played when the opportunity presented itself). I can’t wait to get back into an adventure!

  4. bbaydar says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:32 am

    So far you’re aboot double the votes ahead of Bruce.
    Not bad, not bad.

  5. Bullgrit says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:34 am

    As soon as I post this, I’m off to vote for you.
    I’ve only recently discovered your writing — just finished Just a Geek and Dancing Barefoot — and I can definitely get behind having you as a Secretary of Geek Affairs.

  6. beowuff says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:34 am

    No contest between you and Bruce. I love his movies, but there’s no way he comes close to you on the Geek scale… And it is a geek contest 😛
    I’m thinking of picking up 4E, but I’m concerned about being forced to use miniatures. I feel like WotC is just trying to cash in by making them required… Still, it might be easier to get my wife to play using them 😛

  7. gcsdewfsj says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:36 am

    Here is a thought for all us geek wannabes: the contest to say how many of the 64 “teams” you know well enough to describe to someone who is not of the geek world. I admit to knowing quite a few… but not all of them. It’s bad when you fail you GeekSave….
    F

  8. Wick says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:37 am

    As much as Bruce Campbell rocks, his geek cred isn’t on the same planet as yours. And while this is all in good fun, and shouldn’t be taken too seriously, isn’t it a bit of a stretch to pit a fictional character against a dead person (Hermione vs. Sagan), or for that matter a living person against a character they themselves played?
    In any case, good fun, and hey kinda cool to think that I as a Canadian might have some small effect on the appointment of someone to such an important position in the US. Gruvy.
    And yeah, “get crushered” – awesome. Methinks you’ve read a bit of Spider Robinson at some point.

  9. Katsushiro says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:46 am

    I got my own Core Books for Xmas (PG, DMG, MM), hooked myself up with a subscription to D&D Insider (used to be a huge fan od Dungeon Magazine and Dragon Magazine back in the day, so I couldn’t help myself), and already planning to run a group through the Scales of War arc they’ve started on Dungeon. I haven’t DM’ed in about 10-15 years.. but been *devouring* the 4th Ed. stuff and am pumped to play again.

  10. stoolpigeon says:
    30 December, 2008 at 11:58 am

    PC Mag favorite blogs – 6th one down. Nice.

  11. INTPagan says:
    30 December, 2008 at 12:02 pm

    I went and voted for you, but then I had buyer’s remorse for a moment when I looked at that picture of Bruce Campbell.
    Then I remembered that, at the ripe age of five, my first crushes were simultaneously Wesley Crusher and Captain Picard (the oldest and youngest people on the Enterprise – go figure). So I am zen with the decision.

  12. Christopher says:
    30 December, 2008 at 12:43 pm

    As much as I dig Bruce Campbell, you got my vote. Bruce is too cool and macho to be geekier than you, Wil. Er, not that you’re not cool – just in a different way… (I’ll just trail off now, since there’s probably no smooth way to recover from that.)
    BTW, count me onboard the “Happiest Days” audio book awesomeness train. I bought it last night, and spent the next few hours wandering – or perhaps hurtling is a better term – down memory lane. Unfortunately, I ran out of suds and had to stop listening right after “Let Go – A requiem for Felix the Bear.” Dude, you made me cry myself to sleep… and I will nevereverever admit that again to another living soul.
    “Happiest Days” is absolutely brilliant. ‘Nuff said.

  13. angie k says:
    30 December, 2008 at 1:01 pm

    Re: Geek Madness. I think the cast from Revenge of the Nerds should have gone up against the cast from Real Genius. Real Genius is arguably the best geeky 80s movie ever.
    I put in my vote for you. The Geek Madness is going to get interesting as the rounds progress. 🙂
    P.S. You’ll beat Wesley easily but I’m going to have a hard time voting when it gets to you vs. Stephen Hawking. I guess one has to think of things in terms of geeks and nerds. Prof. Hawking would win the Secretary of Nerd Affairs because, dude, he’s the ultimate nerd. But since we’re going for “geek” cred… you might have a chance. Hmmm…

  14. Pocket Nerd says:
    30 December, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    All the cranky old school D&D grognards I know hate, hate, hate Fourth Edition… now, since I’m a cranky old school D&D grognard as well, I figured it might not be for me, either. But maybe I should check it out.
    And Wil, you totally win the geek contest over Bruce Campbell. Bruce can be the Secretary of Impressing With Humongous Manly Chins.
    (Also, I suggest Congressional deadlocks should be resolved with head-to-head games of Left 4 Dead.)

  15. Carol Elaine says:
    30 December, 2008 at 1:52 pm

    I voted for you without a qualm, Wil, but after seeing Bruce Campbell in person last week for the opening of My Name Is Bruce, there was a slight hesitation.
    You easily out-geek him (in that super cool way of yours), but he is absurdly cool.

  16. JeffD says:
    30 December, 2008 at 4:06 pm

    Had to vote for you, Wil, even though Campbell kicks ass. I’m with Pocket Nerd on Campbell though. He’s got machismo, a big ass chin and cool, but he DOES NOT have geek.

  17. Al E. says:
    30 December, 2008 at 4:09 pm

    I voted, and there were a lot of difficult choices. Going up against Bruce Campbell is a tough row to hoe.
    But, both Wil Wheaton and Wesley Crusher are, well, crushing their opposition so far.
    This reminds me…I really need to do a bracket competition for beer.

  18. SandieK says:
    30 December, 2008 at 4:48 pm

    …
    where did the avatars come from?
    I found it very easy to vote for both of you in the Jor El round.
    Ive eyed DM books for a few years, even though Ive never touched the game in my life. Meh.
    Good luck hopeful future Mr Secretary.
    Uhm…yeah.

  19. SandieK says:
    30 December, 2008 at 4:49 pm

    oO
    Okay, running off to profile to hide the pic.

  20. EverybodysLittlePony says:
    30 December, 2008 at 4:49 pm

    Hey! Cookie Monster likes Wil’s Book, too! Right on!

  21. Wil says:
    30 December, 2008 at 6:25 pm

    The avatars are part of this new TypePad connect thing. I actually like it, because it puts a human face on the comments here.
    Also, threaded comments!

  22. caitlen315 says:
    30 December, 2008 at 6:47 pm

    Wil – for those of us who don’t follow Paul and Storm’s site (the last thing I need is another internet distraction during my work day), can you post a note here or on twitter when the next round of voting starts? kthxbye

  23. HellZiggy says:
    30 December, 2008 at 8:13 pm

    Threaded comments! Awesome! Lack of threaded comments really was the only thing I didn’t like about your blog (I’m a LiveJournal addict. I needs my threaded comments!)
    I can’t figure out how to change my avatar to a picture of me though. 🙁

  24. Paulius says:
    30 December, 2008 at 8:24 pm

    Glad you liked the ‘Geek Seeds’ thing!
    I couldn’t help but think of some of your stories like that when I realised I’d had almost exactly the same experiences…despite being born in 1981 in England.
    Oh, and I don’t want to gush…but I’m a HUGE fan and being mentioned on your blog is a MASSIVE honor.

  25. SandieK says:
    31 December, 2008 at 5:07 am

    Threaded comments are a huge plus, Ill give you that. When I was digging around trying to change the pic, I did see something about connecting blogger to typepad. Tried to hook that up, but my blogger template lacked the ‘widget expander’ (or something like that) box and I couldnt find the specified html.
    Oh well.
    If I could actually remember how I stuck this thing up, Id tell you…but as it is, I cant change this one and typepad has changed more than a few things since I stuck this up and forgot about it.

  26. TheGibson says:
    31 December, 2008 at 6:46 am

    The idea of a Wil Wheaton/Westly Crusher face off blowing my mind. Like Arnold Schwarzenegger/Jack Slater in The Last Action Hero.

  27. SandieK says:
    31 December, 2008 at 2:38 pm

    *sigh* Im going to have to choose between Wil and Wes. I might implode.
    Maybe Ill just sneak on my sisters laptop and go both ways?
    😛

  28. MrJuggles says:
    1 January, 2009 at 12:21 pm

    Complete sidetrack. I’m pottering about the house doing domestic things with my brand new ipod classic and the first thing I thought I’d listen to was “Happiest days of our lives” audio book.
    Track 04, beyond the rim of the starlight
    “Conventions are awesome, I bet they’d let us in for free”
    Hahaha, juice came down my nose and you now owe me a plate that I dropped. You narrate fantasticly Wil, and the timing on that line was great.
    Back to the house for me.

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