My life reboot is going well. Though I make lots of jokes about how I’ve traded everything I liked in my life for water and exercise, I really do feel good. The changes I made to my life, which I’ve committed to maintaining, are making a positive difference in every area of my existence, and I love it.
I’m having a massive existential crisis about being an actor right now, but that’s a whole thing that I’m not going to get into in public until I’ve had more time to think about it, and talk about it with my friends who are other creative people.
But other than that whole thing, I’m happy. I’m taking good care of myself physically, emotionally, and mentally.
So that’s why I’m not going to any conventions this year, except a single one in England this October. This means I won’t be at San Diego Comicon, including w00tstock, or HopCon.
There are probably less than one hundred people in the world who care about that, but if you’re one of them, read on and I’ll tell you why.
Last year I had a miserable time at Comicon. I didn’t enjoy w00tstock, and I just felt like I was “off” during HopCon. I felt massively anxious, uncomfortable in my own skin, and afraid of everything the whole time I was in San Diego. I did a good job of wearing the mask of a person, and I was pretty good as imitating the things that people do, so only the people who know me very well could tell that I didn’t want to be there.
GenCon was awful. I spent the entire convention having meetings with people, trying to repair the damage that someone I thought was my friend had done to me, Tabletop, and all the hard work I’d done for many years.
Every single time I saw that I had to travel for a convention, I spent the whole week hoping that something would happen so that I couldn’t go. Once I got there, I did my best to honor the people who waited to meet me, I did my best to perform well when I was on stage, and I had a few genuine moments of happiness, but I mostly felt tired and overwhelmed.
One of the things I haven’t talked about that is part of my life reboot is making more time for myself. It’s about setting limits, saying no to things even if I think they’ll be fun, and doing my work, instead of someone else’s work.
I realize that this is totally #FirstWorldCelebrityProblems, but I have to take this year off from personal appearances and conventions. I have to stay home and write. I have to find my way back to the art. I have to find my way back to being a creative person who makes stories and characters and creative things, instead of being a person who hosts stuff, does things which are transactional nonfiction, and spends lots of time on the road talking about those things.
The imperfect comparison I’ve been using is that I feel like I’m in a band. I worked really hard for a long, long time to record a record that people liked, and when I finally did, I went out on tour to support it … but I haven’t been able to write or record a new album. It’s like I’ve been on tour so long, I’m starting to resent playing the songs I used to love, and I am just tired and uninterested in doing the shows.
So this summer, I’m not going to be at a lot of the places the few of you who are reading this have gotten used to seeing me. I’m totally burned out, and it interacting with me at any of these things this summer wouldn’t be awesome for me or you.
If everything goes according to plan, I’ll spend the rest of this year writing stories, making podcasts, doing a few narrative fiction film projects, and maybe even somehow getting on-camera work as an actor. If everything goes according to plan, I’m going to create a lot of new stuff this year, and next year I’ll be excited to share it, perform it, and take it to some of the places I’m not going this year.
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Do what you have to do sir. The world will still be here when you get back. Unless Trump becomes president, in which case, we won’t want to live on this planet anymore.
I’ll miss attending a panel led by you at Gen Con this year, but you must always come first. Wishing you nothing but well!
My 8yo and I will miss you at Rose City in PDX but I understand and hope you get what you need from your time off ☺️👍🏼
More power to you. Seek what energizes you, not what drains you.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t sad about your decision. I have missed you sooo much! It seems like forever since you’ve been on anything since The Guild, Leverage, Eureka and The Big Bang Theory. I watch old episodes of Tabletop and video clips that fans have taken of you from ComicCon and I loved when you did Rockband too. I watch all those on YouTube to get my Wil Wheaton fix because whenever I am sad, your big smile and hilarious sense of humor always cheered me up. And I was hoping there would be a new season of Tabletop this year. Now when I read this, I’m so saddened because where is my cheerful Wil? You seem so sad by your tone even though you say you’re not. I miss the wild and cheerful Wil Wheaton we all know and love. Wil, I’m being so selfish making this about me, but when your sad, I’m sad. I want you to do whatever you need to do to feel that creativeness you feel you’ve lost. I want you to feel happy again, fulfilled again and to shine again. And if that means I see less of you in front of the camera this year, then so be it. I can’t be happy if you’re not happy. I have all the rerun footage I need of you on Youtube to cheer me up and tide me over until you’re ready to make appearances again. You take the time you need to find “Wil” again and be creatively happy. And as far as you saying “less than 100 people who care” about you, you better stop that right now! You are loved my millions Wil, for your down to earth, caring and giving personality and your multi-talent and awesome sense of humor! Just ask @theblogess and she’ll tell you how wonderful you are! You’re a wonderful man, Mr. Wheaton because you’ll never be a “dick” and you’ll always be “awesome! Love you always! ❤
This fan is sticking around for good,
Connie
You need to do what makes sense for you – best wishes and positive thoughts
oops! spelling correction-> @thebloggess ((two “g’s” not one))
Oh and not to mention I also have a full movie library of yours……
*A Long Way Home (DVD)
*The Secret Of NIMH (DVD)
*The Buddy System (vhs)
*Long Time Gone (vhs)
*Stand By Me (25th Anniversary Bluray)
*Toy Soldiers (DVD)
*The Last Prostitute (vhs)
*December (DVD)
*The Liar’s Club (vhs)
*Flubber (DVD)
…….and the entire full-season Bluray Box-set of Star Trek TNG to tide me over too.
I told you, I was a huge fan! 😉 ❤
Take care, love! XXXOOO
oops! I forgot to add……
*Book Of Days (DVD)
How could I forget that one?!? It’s one of my favorite movies of yours. It was so heartwarming and had a very good message to it and you moved me to tears with your amazing acting when you cried after Caroline died. sigh
I promise this is my last post. I feel like I’m spamming your comment section my bad It’s just that I love you & want you to know it! No more self-deprecating okay! You have millions of fans that adore you! Never forget that, “awesome”! 😉
Take care and come back shining again! ❤
Hey Wil maybe I’m mis-reading your post and I certainly hope I’m misreading your state of mind, but dude this whole blog post reads like a pre-pre-suicide note. Get your safety net and spotters in place ’cause it sounded like you’re wandering around to the edge of something and you’re gonna ask yourself hey why not jump. So yea, tell your friends to watch you. Now. Because when you feel worse, the last thing you’re going to do is tell anyone whats going on.
You do whatever you need to for you to be ok. Thank you for sharing such personal thoughts and decisions. Be well.
Change is good. Finding your center again can be true therapy. When you get caught up in the whirlwind of the spotlight it can take your soul. So many people go down in flames because of the fame thing. Good to see you take on this change. Very courageous!
PH
Hi, Wil.
I just want to say that I find your posts really inspiring. I want to thank you for your willingness to share not only your triumphs, but your struggles as well. Many of the issues you describe, especially the negative emotions, are things I’ve had difficulty with. I’m sure a lot of people do.
But knowing that even someone as accomplished as you faces the same doubts and insecurities gives me hope that I can accomplish more in my life, and overcome my own hurdles.
So, in short, thanks for being you. I’m really looking forward to the next season of Tabletop, and good luck with all your goals and projects.
Good on you 🙂 life is for living , enjoying, being. Lift that weight up off your shoulders. Fight the demons inside & come back larger than life & shine.
I really want to be as supportive as everyone else here, and I think you are vary brave to be so public about so much of yourself, but this does put a bit of a damper on your appearance at “Mensa-con.” I hope you will feel comfortable there, and less demanded-of. There is a game room available (I think constantly).
BTW, when I saw you were speaking, my first thought was the picture of you “collating papers” for The Bloggess. -heh-
Oh, I’m really looking forward to the AG. In fact, one of the reasons I’m not doing any additional things this summer is so that I can enjoy the AG.
I’m not broken, just in need of some rest and defragmenting of my emotional hard disk.
OK, back on the support train wholeheartedly, and looking forward to it.
Who hurt you Will? Things can be arranged mate, is all I’m saying.
Seriously, come to Hawaii. Ask Aaron Douglas, Hawaii will restore you and swim with the manta rays with Jonathan Frakes and your sense of wonder will be renew your awe of this big blue marble. Regardless, I wish you well. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qEz_8n2TrE
Sorry for all my typos in my post, I’m still recovering from surgery. I’ll leave you with one more link from Roddenberry himself.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
Get back to being creative. Do what you need to do for you.
The fans may love it when you go to a convention, but. you can’t live for conventions. (Have you seen Con Man?)
Take care.
Enjoy Life.
Enjoy your time, and good luck on your personal journey. Hope some day you return, but understand if you never do. Be true to yourself Mr. Weaton. Always.
Good for you we all need to take time for ourselves once in a while I hope you find what you are looking for please know that many people love you and admire you all your fans will stand behind you and we will be here for you blessings
Wil, your sentence “I hear mean and dismissive things from dicks on the Internet all the time about how I don’t do anything and I’m lame and all that stuff, and for awhile, a big part of me believed it.” in your previous post “Anything to take my mind away from where it’s supposed to be.” disturbed me a great deal and made me sad and disappointed.
Wil, are you forgetting that beautiful response you gave to that little girl about bullying at the 2013 Denver Comic-Con? Wil, you were an inspiration to that girl and to millions of others who have been picked on, so why don’t you take your own advice? Why are you letting those stupid “faceless” losers hiding behind a computer upset you? They are pathetic and have sorry lives if all they can do to make themselves feel better about themselves is to put down a well-loved, much-accomplished celebrity like you. Please don’t let them win, Wil! Do you want that girl to read this post and feel saddened that the very same hero that inspired her to rise above bullying is now letting the bullies win? Wil, you’re stronger than this and so much better than those losers! Hey, if it makes you feel any better, put in Justin Bieber or Donald Trump or Miley Cyrus in Twitter’s searchbox and see all the hatred tweets they’re getting. My point is, you’re not the only celebrity that gets hated on, as well as loved. Many celebrities have said that once you get hate mail, then you know you’ve made it as a successful, well-known celebrity. But in all seriousness, don’t let any faceless loser behind a computer upset you. They’re insecure losers with no life. Take your break to be able to shine again, but don’t leave forever or you’ll be letting those losers win. Hold your head up high and know that you have made so many people of all ages so happy and inspired, just by being “you”! We adore you and always will!
I think it takes great self-knowledge and confidence to make a decision like this. I certainly wish you the best on your journey.
It seems like the idea that you are putting across is writing and creating things make you happy and not just the results of those projects. I think anyone who can appreciate those projects will understand that you need time for yourself to be happy. Better to be happy in life now then to work and work only to hope that it will eventually make you happy. For those fans who are a fan of your work should understand that there will be another time or place where they can meet and see you I person.
Good luck! Do what’s best for yourself.
If this is what it takes to get you to make more podcasts, I’m all for it. I need more RFB!
Hey, if you have to take a year off to figure some shit out, then go for it.
Take your time. You are my hero since you first got shot in Toy Soldiers. Still one of my favs. But having been through a massive transition in my life I can relate to what is happening. There is only one of you, take your time and recover, life can be a bitch, it’s what we make of it that counts.
Massive hug from a fan.
I’m doing something very similar this summer with my own life, making certain I don’r turn my favorite hobbies into stress-inducing jobs, only doing them when I feel inspired. I didn’t do that last year and took on too much. My physical and mental health suffered. This summer, I’m keeping things slow, and it seems to be working.
Take care of yourself first. Do what you love. Spend time with your family and friends. Life’s too short to spend our time hating what we’re doing, right?
The band analogy is a very clear explanation–or at least I get it. Pete Townshend of The Who talked about the torture of being on the road and away from the creative process. Have fun creating!
I applaud your willingness to recharge you, to be better for us all. Sending thoughts of peace and strength. See ya next year! 🖖
I’m sorry to hear you haven’t had a good time at those conventions. Anyway, there’s no right or wrong way to heal and boost yourself. Take care Wil. Your life reboot has inspired me to do my own!
Keep on truckin’, Wil.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keep_on_Truckin'_(comics)
Sorry to hear you’re not going to be at ComicCon or Wootstock this year, Wil. I was going to go because I wanted the chance to meet you. Now I’m saving my travel money and going in the future when I know for fact you’ll be there. You know why? Because there is no one else I’d rather see than the guy who gave me the courage to face my nemesis that kept calling me a nerd. I told him I was proud to be a nerd and told him it’s partly because Wil Wheaton is a bonafide proud nerd and the coolest guy on the planet. He shut up after that. Apparently he knew who you were and he must have thought you were cool too. He never picked on me again after that. As for you wanting to take a break, dude you have to do what’s best for you. I’ll support you 100%. Just don’t take too long to make a comeback. Like I said, you’re pretty much my hero.
ummm….One more thing. I know you’re kinda starting your break right now, but will there be a new season of Tabletop this year? Sorry for asking, but my friends and I are so hooked on it.
Take care and stay cool.
Good for you, Wil. Do what you need to. Take care!
You gotta do what you gotta do, and since your reboot began, it’s clear that you ARE doing what you gotta do. We’ll see you in all the places we get to see you, and that will have to be good enough for us. Take care!
“The strong give up and move on, while the weak give up and stay.” This is my mantra, although I don’t tell many people that it’s a direct quote from Hall & Oates.
If what you’ve been doing isn’t making you feel happy and strong, find out what does and steer into it.
A pirate walks into a bar and orders a rum. The bartender looks over and sees that there is a steering wheel sticking out of the pirate’s pantaloons, and asks the pirate: “What’s going on down there?”
The pirate replies: “Aaaaargh, I don’t remember, but it’s steering me balls!”
That is how my friend’s girlfriend once tried to recount a classic joke. Thought it was appropriate, for some reason.
I guess is what I’m saying is, never let anyone else steer your balls.
I do not think you have to answer to anyone except yourself and your family. Do what you have to do to be happy. Life is too short for all of the other BS.
To borrow from Paul and Storm
Wil Wheaton please write, and write faster….
I miss the chapbooks. I still wait for “Memories of the Future” to continue, although I am sure that is not an easy thing for “reasons”.
I don’t check in as often as I once did because of my own “reasons” (called life), but I wait for the next writings to come out. It may be tomorrow, and it may be 10 years from now, but sill I patiently wait.
My mother pointed out that you might need a word of encouragement. You are never forgotten. You are an amazing actor and person in and of yourself, and you are and always will be a part of an amazing legacy (passed on from parent to child to child again: my 5 year old daughter picked out The Final Frontier for this evening’s enjoyment. Same daughter was caught on video laughing and commenting how she loves “shut up Wesley” on the ‘Let it Snow’ Trek medley going around.) I guarantee there will be many more than a hundred missing you at the cons (I’ve never had the money to attend one but I will someday, preferably before everyone passes to Sha Ka Ree). Yes, I am a Trekkie, but I appreciate everything you’ve given us with your talents. Your personal health is first and foremost, though, and always should be. My firstborn son is named Jonathan after a young actor whose struggles became too much for him. I was 15 when I lost a good friend to suicide and fell hard for a blonde haired blue eyed boy I would never meet to renew my faith and hope in life. I was 26, living in rural Tennessee (with no tv channels) and still re-watching home taped episodes of a defunct sci-fi show with his beautiful smile that will always light up my face, when I learned from a friend of his passing. Though he will never know it, he got me through some rough times in my life. You all will never know the lives you touch or the best you bring out in all of us. But always remember, you will only have more to give if you first give to yourself. Immerse yourself in your writing, focus on who you want to be. We’ll be here. (at least for the originals; the new cadets and their fearless leader have lost me after I started yelling at the screen at a drive in theater a few years ago: I mean, seriously! Word for freakin’ word! Who were they kidding?) And my 5 year old daughter who has deep taste in movies like Star Trek, Joan of Arc, and Terminator, well, she’s named after a spaceship. No, not that one. Serenity’s brother can actually say “My sister’s a spaceship; we had a complicated childhood.” Best wishes as you find yourself and just remember: We’ll be here.
For what it’s worth, seeing you, Chris, Laura, et al. at the GenCon panel was one of the highlights of my con.
Take the time to heal yourself. We’ll all be here when you get back.
Thank you for your honesty and your willingness to open up about your troubles. I know it helps so many when they see that they are not alone.
Wil,
Go attend a Con incognito, perhaps in a cosplay outfit, preferably something with glitter.
Be that character instead of Wil Wheaton. Geek out as “just” a fan.
Do Random Acts of Kindness, such as getting in autograph lines then grabbing someone to take your place when you get to the front. Make the Con better for folks, but do it anonymously, retail instead of wholesale.
Those of us who recognize you won’t give you away, but will instead quietly utter the secret pass-phrase: “Who the fuck do you think you are?”
Brian Wilson stayed home from the tour and he created Pet Sounds.
As a musician, I totally get your analogy. I’ve done the same sort of thing. I quit my band years ago because somewhere along the way ‘I’ was lost. I took time to find ‘me’ again and haven’t looked back. I now mainly do things for me, things I create and am genuinely interested in, and my creativity has never been better. The music I make is better and the writing I do is better and, I am better as a person.
Take care of yourself first, as you only get one you.
Good for you. You belong to yourself, no one else. When you come back, come back with joy. Life is too short to spend your days dreading it.
I am sorry that you feel so bad. But evrrybody does. But, most of us just can’t just hole ourselves up and pretend to write. Facing and overcoming our fears and doubts are the only way to lead a truly satisfying life. Don’t run away from life. Embrace it!
Seems to me like he is embracing life, by stepping back from the things that are making him feel thin, sort of stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread.
I hope you don’t understand how profoundly insulting and insensitive this is.
Jeeze man, maybe take the time to reflect on what your saying before you post?! If it’s not kind – don’t post it. Simple.
Mr. Wheaton,
You are inspiring.
You have received many notes of encouragement from those of us who enjoy the fruits of your creativity, and we all want nothing but for you to take care of yourself.
Invest your time into pursuits that enrich you and into your lovely wife; and please, oh please, the new season of Titansgrave (okay, okay, so maybe that’s a selfish request… but I’m pretty stoked about it :P).
Anyway, my individual voice may be lost in the roar of love and support coming your way; but, hopefully, the volume of that outpouring drowns out any other negative, destructive whispers from others or your own internal dialogue.
You are awesome 🙂
All the best to you and yours,
Bek
Wil, this sounds like a great decision and one that will free up a lot of mental energy to focus on the things you enjoy the most in your life. I’m sure there are many who will be disappointed that you’re not making a personal appearance somewhere, but it’s not like you’re abandoning your fans–you’ll just be available to them in a different way, via the work you do instead of at a signing or on a panel or whatever.
This is a great example for all of us. When we’re getting strong feelings of dread about something we assume we should/must do, taking some time to evaluate it and maybe make a new decision really helps us stay balanced and happy. Hope that this next year brings you a lot of satisfaction and delight and renewed pleasure in the creative process and, yes, even in your own celebrity.
Glad to see you taking time for yourself, I am so very grateful for the minute of your time that you shared with me playing magic at Pax Prime last year it meant a lot to be able to thank you in person. Hope to see you around again sometime.