And then it was December. Practically the end of December, in fact. The end of the whole year. That was fast.
I was a few words away from finishing when I realized that, without my noticing it, this thought I’d been drawing out for a little bit had become something I was going to post on my blog.
I haven’t been a blogger for a minute, I thought to myself. I remembered all the times we (the Ur-Bloggers, if you will) wrote the obligatory post about not posting. It was easy to fall off the radar in those days, and staying engaged with people who read whatever we wrote was important. After 20+ years, though, I don’t really feel that urgency.
Back in those days, there were two kinds of bloggers: those who wrote all their posts offline, and those who hadn’t had an entire post eaten by a Netscape crash, yet.
Guess which kind I was when I went to publish my shiny new post?
I can laugh about it now. But at the time, I was really bummed out. I’d put together good thoughts about boundaries and reclaiming something I loved that had been taken from me and perverted into something to hurt me. I had some nice turns of phrase, a good conversational tone that made me feel like I was really doing this writing thing, you know?
This year has been something else, man. I don’t have the stamina at the moment to do a wrap up (for one thing, my arm is killing me from patting myself on the back), but until I do… the first half of this year was all about publishing and promoting and supporting Still Just A Geek.
The second half of this year has been focused almost entirely on self care, therapy, healing, and recovery from all the trauma that the first half stirred up. Lots of therapy every week, lots of homework every night, lots and lots of private writing that I’ll never share with anyone. It’s helping tremendously. I’m healing a lot, but discovering that many wounds go deeper than I knew, or imagined. So there’s a lot of work to do and I’m centering myself and my family while I do it.
I’ve been posting short things on Facebook and Tumblr, and I haven’t missed old school blogging at all, until today. I miss the quick little posts that we’d do before we all moved to Twitter. I miss the lists of links and things that we did before newsletters replaced those posts. I miss the low stakes, when it felt like nobody was watching.
…okay, that’s not exactly true, now that I read it. The stakes were INCREDIBLY high for me back in the day and it was INCREDIBLY important to me that people were watching. But there were long stretches of time when it was just fun. Posts that were just about silly things like pictures of Gary Coleman and KITT, imagined scripts of Robocop as a sitcom, the joy of discovering my voice and where I fit in with other writers. Occasionally starting or participating in a conversation that had positive, meaningful, real consequences in the world. And, of course, a general absence of “Even if we don’t live in the house with the kid who wishes people into the cornfield, his house is in our town, and everything he does affects us no matter how hard we try not to let it oh god we’re all gonna die” in the world.
So in an effort to just kind of take the intense seriousness of it all off the table for a minute, I’m using the most ridiculous theme I could find, to inspire me to just blog like it’s 2003 and nobody’s reading. This post will make less sense in the future, when I change themes again, but if this trick works, it won’t be three months before I post something new here.
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You are such an honest writer and have inspired me to seek help earlier this year for the trauma my father caused in my life.
I miss blogs. Deeper content than failwhale places and less invasive than metamining. 🙃 I always enjoy whatever you write and love reading about the joyful people in your life! 💖
I haven’t been working for about a year now. Without that constant pressure and distraction (and with a layer of gender dysphoria largely removed) a lot of my old trauma has been surfacing. And I’m finding that a few slightly more recent wounds that never healed are tangled up in and kind of shielding that older trauma. I’ve been doing therapy and writing and making music playlists. I still have a long way to go and if I’m being honest I’m slightly terrified that I’m always going to feel this.
This certainly FEELS like a nice throwback to the heyday of blogging when I was avidly involved in everything going on in the lives of my close blogger world. The dancing baby is a nice touch.
I feel a bit like more modern social media has done everything it can to ensure we coalesce our thoughts into 4 words or less, so they can incorporate more advertisements in between. Some days, I long for the long-form day-in-the-life that I used to get from friends and strangers alike. And not only because several of my closer friends from that era have now passed away and all I have left from them is a memory of the words we shared. But also, it just felt more personal to actually read things about people you cared about, and not be inundated with a bunch of posts and ‘news’ from people you didn’t.
I miss having longer blog posts to read. Opening up my blog reader and having something to “actually” read instead of scrolling through snide remarks and memes. Bring it back, Wil. It will be so old skool, it will be new skool!
Were you ever on LiveJournal? I loved LJ for the blogging & for the communities where I met life long RL friends all across North America. There was something a little more intimate about that than the current social media structure.
Never on LJ. It felt too closed for me in those days. I preferred the wide open spaces of my own server.
I miss LJ so much. Just yesterday, someone suggested I finally start really using my Dreamwidth account, but the audience isn’t there anymore, you know? But also, I think I’ve forgotten how to blog? I think, though, I’d like to learn again…I miss the bigger conversations.
OMG the construction sign and dancing baby…
I have been occasionally writing on Medium to get my thoughts out there. I need to write. I wrote a post last week about Claire getting a 504 plan at school and the struggle it took. I remember when I was writing it, I was thinking that I missed the days when blogs were the “it” thing. I missed the long form thoughts that would provoke long form responses. Everything on the internet is now grasping for your attention, so we have devolved into shorter and shorter snippets so you can consume and move to the next thing. I am guilty of this too. Why write three paragraphs when I can throw out a sentence on Facebook? I have spent too much time scrolling through instagram reels, but some of them really make me laugh. Is this a bad thing? Maybe. It’s not like books are getting less popular, so long form still exists. And if there’s anything I do know, it’s that the internet will change. And then one day someone uses a green border and you immediately notice and think… wtf?
Did you watch the kings game last night? My cousin Josh and his kid were the ones that got hit with a puck in the first period. (and when I say my cousin… know that it is Damon’s cousin Laurel’s husband, but we in this group have just decided to all call each other cousins).
Hugs, I see you, I am so frickin proud of you. Hope your holidays are gentle.
Sorry, but I digg the ’80’s radio shack Tandy vibe I’m getting.
and six years later I finally got around to looking into Mastodon and the federated instances, there is more people on there now, you should log in again.
It would be really great to see Wil there!
100%. I think the 2022 Twitter exodus has made the Fediverse a very different place than the last time you tried it – @neilhimself and a number of other folks have started hanging out there. Would love to see you join in – although I also totally understand if you’re not interested in spinning up yet another presence (especially one that legit left a bad taste in your mouth).
I have missed you! I check this blog at least once a week, hoping you have posted. I miss the good old days too. I am so glad you are taking care of yourself.
Hey, Wil. As a 62 year old recent retiree, who doesn’t use Facebook or Tumblr, I can only say, “peace, brother.” Taking care of myself is also now my number one project. And I do appreciate your blog posts.
I read your blog via the Feedly RSS reader (yes, like it’s still 2003!), so I didn’t see your cool new theme right away. Had to click through to see the green on… rows of staples? IC’s? In the background.
Anyways, just wanted to share that I’ve been reading WWDN (and WWDN: In Exile!) since 2001 or so and I never stopped. I remember thinking it was really cool that a celebrity had taken the time to learn HTML to make a web site!
The couple of times I’ve met you at various signings and cons you’ve always been very nice, and hid the anxiety very convincingly. I’ve also had to pretend everything isn’t anxiety at times in my life, so thanks for writing about it.
Take care, and keep writing!
—
-= Chris
Since reading about the horrors of social media in a few books like The Chaos Machine, I’ve weened myself those resources and gone retro with an RSS reader, so I appreciate greatly a rededication to blogging.
The format/theme on this speaks to my core. Thank you so much! 🙂
It’s pretty great!
I think many of us miss the days of blogging. We miss the days when the Internet seemed smaller and friendlier. Some of it is nostalgia, and us editing out the bad times and remembering the good. But some of it is also remembering what we have lost.
I made a decision a month ago to quit social media, cold turkey, forever. Obviously there are some constraints. I have work that requires checking in on Facebook Messenger, or LinkedIn. I check them quickly and close the tab again. I don’t ever open Twitter. After the nonsense that has gone on there in the last few months, I don’t feel I even need an excuse to abandon it.
I’m making do with an RSS newsreader, which keeps me up to date on awesome blogs like this one. And with a few select email newsletters. And books. Books! I have so much more time for reading books now! Books are awesome.
I’m not saying my choice is for everyone. But it’s been pretty great for me.
Dancing baby DANCING BABY!!
There was a very long period of time in my life when I would have passionately argued that the dancing baby would NEVER be something we looked back upon fondly. And yet.
Reading a blog on a cell phone with this theme is definitely a clash of the ages 🤣
Wil, so good to do my daily tap into WWDN and find something new. You are loved and cared about and were missed here. I am glad you’ve been taking care of yourself. That is important. 💕
Read this via my RSS feed.
Glad I clicked on the post to get the full aesthetic.
So good to see blog again!!! I’m right there with you on the progression of 2022; faster than imagined, yet slower than where the thoughts had been. Cheers to wherever 2023 lands you!
I’ve here from my RSS reader (inoreader if anyone wants to know). Blogs were good. RSS was good. When Google killed its RSS reader I knew it was a bad sign.
2023.
Let that sink in.
Whew.
Up the long ladder, indeed.
Hello Wil,
On the off chance you actually get to read my thoughts, here goes;
I stumbled upon your story about Mastodon:
https://wilwheaton.net/2018/08/the-world-is-a-terrible-place-right-now-and-thats-largely-because-it-is-what-we-make-it/
I wanted to reply there, but I couldn’t, so I’m gonna reply here.. and if you read this far, stick with it, just a moment longer.. 😉
if (move_reply == possible) { delete previous line; }
I can understand what the admin did, but it was beyond sad that this apperantly was neccesarry..
It was a good (bit lengthy 😉 read, so I want to thank you for writing it.
I’ve started mastodon.frl, so I’m a “resent Mastodon admin”. FRL stands for Friesland (a province of The Netherlands, Europe). It’s only a small instance, since (relatively speaking) that aren’t that an enormous amount of Frisians 😉
So in that context your experience is a good “case study” and should be a mandatory read for every Mastoadmin.
Shut up?
But still, as I still try to adhere to my principles as much as possible, I’m am deeply saddnend that your good intentions, vision about your “dislike” of twitter and your search for an alternative met that much “resitance”.. So you did turn silent on Mastodon. “they won”..
Could it be that you just picked the wrong instance?
Could it all be just “unlucky timing” (in a broad sence of the word)?
Resistance is not futile!
Then I started to read bits and pieces of your blog. That, for me, gave a whole new dimension to the “Wow! signal”. And let’s leave it at that (otherwise my “little reply” is going to get lengthier than your post :P)
But you know this: resistance in NOT futile!
Aso, choose your “battles” wisely. You’ve lett them take their victory lap. “They” are a bit older now.. and if they are lucky they actually may have become a bit wiser. And maybe “social media” is growing up in a way..
In any case, Mastodon may be(come) more a mirror “to the real world” than what is out there now in that genre. In the real world there are a-holes and some of them simply are smart enough to operate a mouse and keyboard.. But the interresting thing about Mastodon is, that one is not limited to one. You can choose your friends.. you can also choose your instance. And.. well.. sometimes one needs to find a new one..
If at first you don’t succeed..
Mastodon is “federated”, so maybe choose an other instance?
Maybe universeodon.com ? George Takei is on that one, so I’m guessing that server can handle the load of him, they can handle you? Out of principle I’dd welcome you to on my instance, but then I would be verry curious to learn what your “link” is (going to be) with Friesland 😉 I will await your personally motivated application.
And, more seriously, you could even start your own instance? Maybe with some more people you know? You got hit by the downside of structure of Mastodon, but when you rethink it, it also provides equal, and maybee even better, opportunities!
In any case, I’dd love to see you back on Mastodon. And if I can somehow help you with that..
I’dd like to conclude with a quote from a guy I just learned a bit more about:
“Thank you.. for a lot of things.”
Just posted a ‘bit lengthy’ reply.. did it get through?
Also here from my RSS reader (dammit, it’s dreamwidth, the replacement/fork of LiveJournal run by REALLY NICE PEOPLE, a proper blogging place if only there were more people there and I really miss LJ now!) to say thanks for the writing and the insta posts!
Welcome back, Will. Your post brought back some fond memories. Now I’m off to share it with that friend in Salt Lake City I met on my blog 20 years ago (but still haven’t met in person…)
Oh, I’m so glad I read this update on your blog and not via Feedly. It just wouldn’t have the same impact. Love the theme, it certainly brings back memories.
I love this so much. How fun. I’m glad you’re healing, Wil. Keep going. One step at a time. I wish you all the health and happiness in the world.
FWIW, I still open up your blog every single day as a part of my “Daily Reads” bookmark folder right after Scalzi’s Whatever. It’s been there for several decades without changing position, no matter how much or how little you post. 🙂
I miss it too. I used to look so forward to these posts and now I will sometimes realize I haven’t checked for one in weeks, but I’ve scrolled through Facebook or Instagram a million times. I’ve said it before, but you’re the reason I started blogging going on twenty years now and that hobby led to me being able to make a career change and led me to jobs I like instead of jobs I just did because I had to.
I’ve been blogging since 2009 on WordPress, as it’s the best format for my type of writing. It’s like an old friend now and I am returning to it more often these days after a couple of very bad years. It allows me to be silly and serious all at once.
Glad that you felt up to writing something here. I hope the upcoming year has twice the healing (if needed) and less than half of the pain.
My first thought was “Please don’t let the website having crashed (again)”. Glad it did not.
But you are right, I miss blogging too. Back in the day when sharing what is going on in your life was more than just a nice photo or a single thought in 140 characters.
Rock on, brother- we’ve got your six.
I have never, and will never (barring some dystopian future bereft of other options that I’m currently unaware of) be on any social media thingy, but I love your blog, and miss Radio Free Burrito back when it was basically an audio blog. Glad you’re back blogging. Happy Winter Holiday of your choice, or all of them. Whatever. The happy is the important part. 🙂
I love it so much but “holy crap, this theme hurts my eyes!” Glad you’ve been able to see yourself through the hard stuff the past year has stirred up. I finished Just a Geek last month and added it to the Shrine O’Wheaton (my wife made it and told me it goes in my classroom…long story, less creepy than it sounds. I promise.). Great book! Dead Trees Give No Shelter is next.
About your theme.. its great, don’t know how long it’s been to see the dancing baby 😛
But.. one tiny comment.. I’ve coding for over a quarter century.. and I’m afraid you can here the sound of my teeth grinding all over the big pond.. please get rid of the make spaces of them, or real brakes.. anything but this!
I really wish we had a huge return to old-school blogging and less social media scrolling.