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WIL WHEATON dot NET
WIL WHEATON dot NET

50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

Author: Wil

Author, actor, producer. On a good day, I am charming as fuck.

Tabletop Submission Criteria

Posted on 21 August, 2015 By Wil

While I was at GenCon meeting with game publishers, I learned that a longtime friend who I completely trusted to be a liaison between me (and Tabletop) and game publishers was abusing and betraying that trust in the worst way. Among several profoundly upsetting revelations, I learned that  our submission criteria was not being clearly communicated to designers and publishers. This isn’t fair to anyone who has a game they think would work on the show, and is personally upsetting to me, because I probably missed more than a few potentially awesome games.

I have taken significant steps to ensure that the problems we experienced in season three as a result of that betrayal will never happen again. As we get ready to select games for next season, I want to ensure that everyone knows how we choose games to play, so nobody’s time, money, or resources are wasted.

So what follows is a copy of the email we are sending to all the publishers we met. It is also published on geekandsundry.com, where anyone can view it. It’s also here, because I want to make sure that everyone who needs or wants to see this can see it.

To the Publishers:

At GenCon this year, after meeting with dozens of game publishers, it became clear to us that our submissions process for TableTop was broken. The first step toward repairing this process is better direct communication between us at TableTop and the publishers we hope to work with. Rather than rely on a single person to communicate our submission criteria, we are publishing it online and in email, so everyone has access to the same information.

The following criteria will help you determine which of your games are most likely to be played on TableTop:

  1. Your game must be available at retail outlets when its episode of TableTop airs. We will not consider games that are in development, in stages of crowd funding, or otherwise not available for gamers to purchase and play.
  1. We have 4 players on each episode of TableTop, so your game should work best with 4 players. This does not mean that it can be played by only 4 players, but it should really shine with 4 players. A good example is Bang!, which technically works with 4 players, but is at its best with 7 or more. As much as we love Bang!, it just won’t work on Tabletop.
  1. Games can not require simultaneous play, or need to be played in real time. Games like Escape: The Curse of the Temple or Jungle Speed are super fun, but the simultaneous play makes them impossible to film and edit.
  1. Your game should have a strong, good balance of strategy and luck. We want everyone who plays to feel invested throughout the episode. Skewing too far in one direction or the other may leave some players out.
  1. Your game should look good and be produced on quality materials. TableTop is a visual show, after all, and we need the games we feature to look awesome.
  1. Games need to be playable in about 90 minutes to fit into our production schedule, and to allow us edit the final cut to about 35 minutes. Longer games are occasionally okay for two part episodes, but those are rare exceptions.
  1. For season 4, we’re very interested in seeing and playing games that are accessible to families. We’ve seen that a huge portion of the TableTop audience is made up of families who watch together, and we want to play some games this coming season that they’ll love to play together. This does not mean that we’re looking for children’s games. Rather, we are looking for games that can be played by a wide range of ages. For example, Catan Jr. is a game you can play with your kids that is not a kid’s game. Smash Up is probably a little complex for a 7 year-old, but a 10 year-old shouldn’t have any trouble with it. Both of those games can be fun for adults to play with or without their kids.

We want you to know that games fitting all these criteria are the most likely to end up on the show. We anticipate over 200 submissions this season, from which 18-20 will be selected for TableTop, so a game that fits all 6 of these criteria will probably edge out one that fits only 4. However, if your game doesn’t fit all of these rules, but fits most of them, we’d still love to see it. If your game breaks one of these rules in a spectacular and interesting way, we’d also love to see it. Please let us know in your submission if this is the case, which criteria you did not align with, and why you think we’ll love it. Please note, Rule 1 is non-negotiable.

Rather than send product, we’d like to save you time and money. Please submit information about your game to Ryan Copple & Claudia Sanchez at tabletopsubmissions [at] geekandsundry dot com. We’ll need to know the title and designer of your game, the core mechanics, playing time, target age, and when it will be available in stores. You may include marketing materials if you think they will be helpful for us.

We will compile a list from these e-mail submissions and reach out to those of you who have games we believe could be a good match for our show. At that time, we’ll ask you to send those games to the Geek & Sundry offices, directed to Ryan & Claudia’s attention. We are asking for a minimum of 2 copies of your game. One copy will go to Wil Wheaton, to play with his family and his game group. One copy will be played by the offices of Geek & Sundry. Going forward we do not require more than 2 copies of a game in order to consider that game for Tabletop. If you are able to send a 3rd copy it may help us ensure as many people as possible can play the games, but 2 will be enough for consideration.

Tiki Tilt

Posted on 17 August, 2015 By Wil

Anne likes Mai Tais, and I like making things — especially things that my wife likes — so I’ve been learning how to make tropical drinks from the golden age of the American Tiki restaurant. My guide to all of this has been Jeff “Beachbum” Berry, specifically his books Beachbum Berry Reloaded and Potions of the Caribbean.

Both books have dozens of tiki drink recipes in them, which is why they are practical and useful, but the thing I love about these books is their history of the American tiki craze of the 20th century. These books are filled with pictures of long-forgotten theme restaurants from all across the country, and photographs of the drinks, the menus, the bars, and recollections from the people who made them.

So last night, I made Anne a Mai Tai, I made a Samoan Fog Cutter for Ryan’s girlfriend, Claudette (which we renamed The Tahitian Fart, because I didn’t have any sherry for the float, so I used 151 that I set on fire instead), some kind of Grog for Ryan,  and a Planter’s Punch for myself.

It was fun and festive, and our drinks went well with the Les Baxter music I was playing on the Sonos, and the teriyaki-marinated chicken sandwiches we grilled for dinner. We watched a great movie, enjoyed each other’s company, and then when Ryan and Claudette left, it was time for bed.

Right. Well. It turns out that the sugar in the tropical drink plus the caffeine in the black tea in the drink had a stacking effect that gave me -10 to saves vs. Stay Awake, so I ended up just getting out of bed and shuffling into my office, where I fired up my new obsession, Pinball Arcade.

I desperately want to get a pinball machine for my game room, but there just isn’t room, so Pinball Arcade is a really good substitute for me. I’ve been playing it so much, I’m starting to get some pretty high scores (for me) on some of the machines I play frequently … and last night, this happened:

Attack from Mars

I got the highest score on this Attack From Mars table.Elvira Party Monsters

Then I got all the high scores on Elvira and the Party Monsters.Medieval Madness

And then I got all the high scores on Medieval Madness.

I tried to run the table on Cyclone, but by this time my lungs were aching for air, and I was finally able to engage in some much-needed rock climbing.

Seven hours of sleep later, during which I had a dream that — I shit you not — featured me designing and then playing a pinball machine based on Pink Floyd’s The Wall, before I went to see The Wall with my son, Nolan, I woke up, feeling irrationally proud of what I’d accomplished.

Paraphrasing a certain smuggler: “Good against simulations is one thing, but good against the real thing?”

I guess I’ll have to head on down to a real arcade once I get the time, and see if I can count my experiences at the virtual tables as training, or if it’s just something I’m doing when I should probably be pretending to be productive.

this is not how this week was supposed to go down

Posted on 12 August, 201512 August, 2015 By Wil

Me: I’m going to get some words down on this story I’ve been developing for months!

My brain: Okay. Let’s do this.

My body: Not so fast. I have to cough so much all of our muscles are going to hurt.

Me: Okay. You done?

My body: Not just yet. I also have to sort of ache a little bit and also produce a whole bunch of snot and crap for you. Also, I need to cough some more.

Me: Got it. Now, let’s get to work!

My body: Can we just put a pin in that for a moment? Our throat needs some attention. It’s not nearly scratchy enough. Oh, and this cough isn’t really doing anything, but it’s a whole thing now, and I’m not really ready to give it up.

My brain: Um. Fellas?

Me: Yeah?

My body: What’s up, brain?

My brain: This is bullshit. When you’re ready to get your shit together, you let me know, and we’ll do some awesome creative work. Until then, I’m going to check out and focus on amusing cat pictures.

Me: NO! YOU CAN’T DO THIS! I NEED YOU!

My brain: I know he isn’t going to actually buy a boat, but my god this is still as funny as it was the first time.

Me: YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!

My brain: Let’s play pinball arcade, buddy.

My body: Yeah, about that … I’ve slowed down your reactions and increased the coughing. I am really into this whole coughing thing.

Me: I think I’ll just go take a nap.

My body and my brain: Finally, something we can all agree on!

My body: … I’m just going to keep coughing. Sorry not sorry.

summer colds are the worst

Posted on 11 August, 2015 By Wil

Just in time for me to commit to spending my August working on my own projects and recovering from months and months of endless work, I seem to have come down with some sort of summer cold.

Because of course I did.

Anyway, I’ll complain about it for a day or two, and then I’ll just power through and stay focused on my writing projects, and maybe I’ll finally edit together some videos I’ve been meaning to edit forever.

I’m still making occasional episodes of Not Radio Free Burrito, if you’re into that sort of thing. Maybe I’ll make one where I just cough and sneeze and grumble about it. That’s what the people want, and I know how to give the people what they want.

Speaking of that, here’s the season finale of Titansgrave:

I can’t believe we’re done with this season. It feels like we just started.

Can I hibernate? I want to hibernate for a couple of months.

you must remember this

Posted on 9 August, 2015 By Wil

Earlier this year, I became completely hooked on the podcast Serial. I wasn’t alone, as it rocketed to the top of the charts in every podcast directory, and became A Thing for about three months.

Ever since it ended, I’ve been looking for something to pick up where it left off, in terms of pacing, compelling subject matter, production quality, and intellectual stimulation. I expected that podcast directories like Stitcher and iTunes would be the place to find what I was looking for, but other than recommending This American Life, they weren’t very helpful.

Enter my friend Ed. Ed is a writer who is currently doing a magnificent comic about the early years of Hollywood called The Fadeout. Ed turned me on to a podcast called ​You Must Remember This, which is about Hollywood’s first century.

For the last couple of months, You Must Remember This has been looking back at ​the Manson Murders, unpacking where Charles Manson came from (both physically and spiritually), and how the changing scene within Hollywood (as a geographic location and an industry) in the 1960s created an environment where he and his followers could find each other.

This season, You Must Remember This will explore the murders committed in the summer of 1969 by followers of Charles Manson, and the Hollywood music and movie scene surrounding the killings. Throughout the series, we’ll learn how a single sociopath’s thwarted dreams of fame and fortune led to the gruesome events which became the symbolic “end of the sixties.” Future episodes will explore the various celebrities, musicians, movie stars and filmmakers (including Roman Polanski, Sharon Tate, The Beach Boys, Dennis Hopper, Doris Day and more) whose paths crossed with Manson’s in meaningful ways, both leading up to the murders and in their aftermath.

I love this podcast, and once I get caught up on the Manson episodes, I’m going to go back to the beginning and binge the whole series. I think some of you will like it, too.

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