When he was 23, my friend Steve killed himself, and though I don’t think of him every day, I do think of him often, and I wonder what kind of life he’d have now if he’d gotten help for his Depression. Being 40 and recalling being 23, I can’t imagine a person ending a life that is just beginning.
I thought about Steve today when I read Jenny Lawson’s post about suicide and depression.
Talking about suicide makes me think suicidal thoughts, which is probably one of the stupidest triggers in the history of the world.
Nonetheless, it’s important that we do speak up and that we’re aware of the dangers inherent in the world we live in. And it’s not just about those of us with mental illness. About one in four adults suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year. That means if you think about your 10 favorite people in the whole world two of them could be at risk of suicide. That’s why it’s so important to recognize the warning signs and to know how to get help for yourself or others. If you or someone you know is thinking of suicide call 800-273-TALK, or click here for resources.
But for today let’s talk about the positives. Let’s talk about why we’re still here. Let’s talk about the words that help us get through. Let’s talk about the pictures and places and songs that saved us, because maybe they can save others.
I’m here because my daughter saves me every day.
The words that help me make it through are “Depression lies.”
I haven’t ever talked about this in public, but today’s a good day to start.
I haven’t ever felt suicidal, but I do have Depression and Anxiety. I suffered for no good reason for decades, until I couldn’t reconcile my awesome life with feeling terrible all the time. Talking therapy wasn’t ever enough for me, and I was very resistant to medication, because I believed (and continue to believe) that we are an over-medicated culture.
But, still, I wouldn’t just sit around and suffer if I had a treatable non-mental illness, so I went to a doctor, and I got better. Now, I take some medication every morning, and it has made all the difference in my life.
I remember the first week after I started meds, Anne and I were out for a walk. I felt her hand in mine, and realized that I didn’t have any lingering tension or unhappiness just buzzing around in my skull. I was just enjoying a walk with my wife, and holding her hand.
And I began to cry, because I was so happy.
“It’s like I was in a loud room for so long, I didn’t know how loud it was,” I said, “and all I have now is the ringing in my ears.”
She squeezed my hand and I said, “I’m going to remember that ringing in my ears, so I never go back into that room again.”
That was about four years ago, and I’m happy to say that I’ve stayed out of the room. I can actually enjoy my friends, my family, and my life. I have bad days from time to time, but I know they’ll pass, and — most important of all — I may have Depression, but Depression doesn’t have me. I know that’s sort of corny, but it’s pretty accurate, too.
So, please, if you or someone you know suffer from Depression — with or without thoughts of suicide — please talk to someone, and get help from a doctor. As Jenny says, Depression lies, and you don’t need to let it control your life.
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Wil, thanks for sharing this. As I mentioned on Twitter earlier, I am an Iraq vet with chronic PTSD, accompanied by depression and anxiety. I know it’s embarrassing to talk about this and takes courage (it took me six years to acknowledge outside of my family), but when influential people openly discuss mental illness, depression, et. al, it all becomes less of a stigma and everyday people are more likely to seek help because they don’t feel so alone and outcast. Thanks again very much for sharing this. It will help a great deal of people.
((hug))
Depression/anxiety has hit many in my family, but I’ve only poked a toe in a time or two. My mom tried when I was 8. A high school classmate killed himself at 16.
Sixteen.
A friend in college at 29. (an old thing I wrote about him)
http://melissasvillage.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-skilled-writer-in-me-desperately.html
Stay strong, folks.
Thanks for posting about this, Wil. I’m still working on getting out of the room and it helps.
I also struggle with depression and have survived multiple bouts with severe depression. Thank you for posting this, and I’m so glad to hear you have a good hold on it.
This post made me cry, in a good way. Thanks.
Depression does lie, and sometimes people lie too, like the people who told me that I was a worthless freak and should kill myself, because I’m transgender.
The message that we are no good is equally dangerous whether it comes from chemicals in our brains or from people outside of ourselves. And both can lead to suicide if we don’t find a way to shut those messages off. That may come from medication, from therapy, or from finding a safe place away from abusers.
I think all of us who have struggled with suicidal thoughts should support one another, regardless of what situation brought us to that point. There are many paths that can lead a person to suicide, and there are many paths that lead out.
I’m glad you’re still here, Wil.
People who have never been clinically depressed often don’t understand what it’s like and think that if you just try hard enough you can get out of your funk. I’m sure you wished this to be true, as have I. When I finally started taking medication I didn’t think it was working because I didn’t feel “high”…but then I noticed after a couple of weeks that things just didn’t seem so bleak, that I was actually smiling, even laughing out loud. I wish more people would understand that you don’t choose to be depressed any more than you choose to be diabetic or nearsighted. We don’t question people who take insulin or wear glasses to correct a physiological imbalance; neither should we question people taking medication to correct the imbalance that is causing their depression. Then maybe the stigma attached to depression would be lifted and people who are suffering in silence would seek the help that is available. I am thankful every day that medication has helped take me out of that depressed world. Thank you for having the courage to share your experience. I hope it helps others who may still be suffering to realize that there is help and there is hope.
As a person who has lived with depression for most of my life, I thank you for this and I love you even more for your openness. I am all about shining a light in those dark and dismal corners so that others know that they are not alone. Depression lies and steals and stomps on your brain, but if you’re suffering there is help. Go get it if you need it, people. The world needs every one of us.
Thank you. Thank you for publicly stating that you are dealing with depression yourself. Thank you for sharing that personal, private and intimate moment. You made me cry. I’m not there yet, but I’m trying, and hopefully will be soon. The part that spoke to me most was when you said you realized you felt Anne’s hand, instead of feeling the tension and anxiety – that’s where I need to be – to be able to spend time with the people I love without thinking about how horrible I am, how unworthy of their love I am. Thank you. From a fan who has adored you for decades, thank you.
As my beloved says, “better living through chemistry”. I don’t take my zoloft all the time, but when I need it it has my back. Yeh, the buzzing in the ears is kind of weird and the other, ummm, “effects” are obnoxious, but all in all, we’re damn lucky to be living in an age where we’ve got help.
Oh… and welcome back to .Net! Those of us who’ve been with you for the long haul are happy to come home.
I read this post, and actually cried myself. I am a grown, 26 year old man, and I have no problem with it, because I’ve been there.
With me, it all started when my mom got sick (she had MS, and we didn’t know it until 2 or 3 years later). She was my best friend, and she had changed. I couldn’t handle it. They say that depression has a trigger, and that was mine. At the time, I was in 7th/8th grade, and just starting to understand things. I started to withdraw from things that I loved, and didn’t know what to make of it. I needed my best friend…but felt like she wasn’t there for me(Little did I know she had been going through the same thing for years, and had just started to get worse.)
I started high school, and things got really different, really fast, and I couldn’t keep up. I enjoyed sleep and the dark more and more. I didn’t go out much. I didn’t socialize unless I had to. Luckily, my Mom (who had depression, anxiety, and now diagnosed with MS) noticed this. She said “this isn’t my kid I see. You hardly ever smile anymore. Do you feel ok?” At this point, I broke down into tears, and explained that I hurt, but a hurt that I had never felt. I explained that on my walks home from school, I would think about jumping off a bridge, and just being done with it. That maybe if I survived, I’d get hit by a truck. I just had death on the mind. It wasn’t too much longer, and I went to the doctor.
At this point I was medicated, and started feeling better, but I wasn’t fully there. I could socialize, and have fun…but I still had a hole. No matter how much I ran, it would just keep sucking me down. I battled with this for several years, graduating and moving on to college, trying different medications and routines, but still the thoughts would come: “I could just drive off this road, into that pole, and no one know for hours.” Thankfully, I have an awesome family, that made it known, over and over, that they were there for me. That I wasn’t alone. I didn’t have to do it on my own. That I could talk to them, and they wouldn’t judge me.
I now sit here, on my bed, reflecting back on this bumpy ride I’ve had. I now have 2 jobs and a place of my own. I can’t remember the last thought I had of offing myself. I laugh and joke, and actually feel whole. I love life.
I beg you…if you still haven’t gotten it, and this is the only comment you read, hear this: If you feel like I have felt, GET HELP! You dont have to do it alone. Or know someone who is going through the same thing, all you have to do is listen. Let them know that you are there for them, and that you will listen to how they feel, their dreams, whatever, and won’t judge them. This thing claims way to many good people in this world. Save yourself, or save someone around you. You’ll be happy in the end. I promise.
Thank you so much for talking about such a personal thing with us. With so many people reading your blog and seeing that someone as amazing and life loving as you suffers from Depression, they may be given the hope and the courage to take a step to getting help.
I am so very glad that we have 40 Year old Wil Wheaton to applaud and admire all he does. I am equally glad that you have your wife so she can remind you daily just how amazing you are!
I’m Bi Polar and with that comes intense intense depression and anxiety. I will admit, though I dont admit this to many people, that I have attempted to commit suicide because everything was just too overwhelming and I didnt know how to cope. It started when I was 14 and I am now 23. I have been medicated consistently for about 3 and a half years and I thank God for it everyday.
I remember once a few years one of my medications stopped working and I sank back down into my depression. I called my doctor as soon as I realized(being bipolar it took me a while to realize that I wasnt okay). But I remember thinking how the heck did I last so long feeling this way. Because after feeling good for a few years being sunk back into that was a terrifying and completely overwhelming. But I know now that through the medication and the therapy I will be okay. I am okay. My Bipolar does not control my life anymore and it wont ever again.
Last October my dearest, closet friend killed himself. On Halloween I found his body; his mailed suicide note crumpled inside my coat pocket. The man was a genius and his method of achieving peace at last was morbidly impressive. He died at 50. He suffered from depression his entire life. But he tried. Oh, by the gods, did he try to be cheery, to go to therapy, to take medication. Unfortunately he opted to drink the pain away. When that stopped working, he made the final decision. He was clever, any observations or suspicions I had he would reassure me was something else. Yes, depression lies and it took my friend away.
Thank you, Wil. Your sharing has brought tears to my eyes. We are not alone!
Thank you so much for posting this, Wil. It’s so important for people with mental illness (like myself) to know that there are people that fight the same fight and, even better, can rise above the fight. I know how much trouble I have talking about my mental health issues so I know this can’t have been easy for you. Thank you for sharing your story and for giving people someone to relate to.
Thanks for posting this Wil. What got me was when you said “I suffered for no good reason for decades, until I couldn’t reconcile my awesome life with feeling terrible all the time.” I don’t have depression, but I have severe ADHD and OCD, and what you describe is part and parcel of suffering with mental illness is like. It can be tough to recognize it in yourself because the tool you measure normality by — your mind — is the very tool that’s damaged. It’s like all you have is a ruler that’s 11 inches long so you assume that that a foot and you can’t understand why the house you built keeps falling down. I also agree with you that we’re badly over-medicated, but those who truly suffer with mental illness, medication can be like night and day. I still spend time fighting with my own mind, battling back the irrational anger and bizarre rituals, but thanks to medication, I win a lot more often.
Thanks for sharing. Reminders that other people are going through the same problems you have, it really helps.
Bravo, sir. It took me a long time to realise I suffered from depression, and more time still to have the courage to do something about it. I’m with billco regarding the medication: it helped me to see through the fog but I wasn’t “me” anymore. It was, I think, the catalyst I needed to make the life changes that have allowed me to be well again.
Thankfully I no longer have to take the pills – when the roaring fog starts to come back I tell someone. My wife, my mum, my boss. The act of admitting what is happening – instead of bottling it up – is usually enough to get me through it.
Depression lies…but it can get better.
Your loud room analogy is bang on, although I called it the roaring fog
As someone who has lived with depression since childhood, the words “depression lies” ring so true. Thank you for sharing this.
You’re basically one of the awesomest people I have the pleasure of reading/viewing, and it breaks my heart to know you were at any point in time in the same spot I’ve been all my life. Meds won’t help me because for some reason they just don’t. (I’ll even wake up during surgery because it won’t take; my body just seems to reject medication. Most I get is a migraine and side-effects, but benefits, nope. So it hasn’t been for lack of trying.) I’m glad/grateful your body didn’t betray you like mine did. Your posts often brighten up my days, so yeah, well… Thank you. For getting help, for making me smile regularly in spite of myself, and for just being awesome to your readers and your family. You’re a good guy, and I wish you all the happiness in the world. Love, Jo
thanks for sharing this, Will! There is so much shame surrounding mental illnesses like depression. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder II after a major suicide attempt at age 30. I’m so glad every day when I look at my dogs and my fiancee that I did not succeed.
I think more people need to talk about this and take it out of the shadows.
Thank you for helping spread the word about depression. The more we talk about it, the more we take away the stigma of mental illness.
Depression is a lying bastard. Don’t ever forget that.
You continue to impress me Wil Wheaton; I’d adopt you but the fact that we’re the same age might make that odd!
Hopefully when people like you talk about stuff like this then people like ‘them’ might understand a little better. Glad you found the right fix for you and VERY glad to see WWdN in full swing!
Thank you for saying this So many people struggle with depression, anxiety, etc. It’s really true: the more people talk about their depression or other mental illness, the less stigma will occur. I am bipolar and fight that stigma every day. And it’s taken me a LONG time to realize that depression lies. I tried to commit suicide by swallowing a lot of pills once (I don’t recommend the aftermath – a stomach pumping is really just “let me shove this giant tube down your throat, push a bunch of fluid down it, and force you to throw up AROUND THE TUBE over and over and over again.” I’ll never do it again, if just to avoid that.).
Thank you for this post, Wil. Too many people suffer in silence, thinking that seeking help for a mental illness is a sign of weakness. We need more people to stand up like you have here and maybe we can drop this ridiculous stigma.
Thanks for sharing. I resisted going on meds for depression and anxiety for a number of years, but once it got to the point of barely being able to leave the house, we knew something had to change. I used to say “People aren’t meant to be happy ALL the time” – now I realize that we aren’t meant to be UNhappy all the time, either. Good on you for choosing to take care of yourself.
Wil,
Thanks so much for sharing such a personal story. My son has been dealing with depression at 19, and tried a number of drugs that made some impact, but generally had worse side effects. We made the difficult financial decision to send him to CanAdventure wilderness adventure and counseling camp, to a tune of $5000 this spring. It was the reason I wasn’t able to attend GenCon this year and present Darwin’s World to you in person.
The 32 day wilderness course grounded him and made a huge impact in his life. Since then, he is doing regular counselling, and now is working a part time job and generally feeling much more confident about his life. I think that people, like myself, who don’t suffer from depression have a difficult time understanding how debilitating depression can be, and it’s important for people to get over the stigma associated with depression and do whatever they can to help out.
So for all the people who are struggling with depression, way to go!
Thank you for speaking up. As someone who has been dealing with depression since I was a teen, I know how hard it can be to just get through a day sometimes. Having meds that can make the overwhelming chatter of thoughts crank down makes all the difference. And stepping forward and sharing your story matters.
When things get bad I know I have people I can reach out to who will hold my hand until I can yet again convince myself that depression lies. And being there for other people, even if all I do is say “hey, I’m here, I know, and I care” is important.
Can’t wait to meet you and Anne at JCCC 3. We need a special depression sucks handshake.
Thanks for sharing this, Wil. I’ve been down the rabbit hole before. You know what helps when things start to feel awry? Writing. 🙂
Thanks for posting this Wil. I’ve also suffered from chronic Depression for basically my entire life, and I also found that just a small dose of medication helped me. The analogy I usually use is that Depression makes it so that doing anything is like trying to walk through molasses. It just takes so much energy just to do things that are on the surface incredibly simple. The medication made it so that it didn’t take so much energy to do things.
Unfortunately, I lost my job almost a year ago now, along with my health insurance. My doctor gave me 3 months of medication when I was laid off, but once it ran out, I crashed pretty hard. I wasn’t able to get myself out of the house to look for a job for six months. Luckily, the past couple of months have been better. I’ve been pushing myself to eat better, get at least a small amount of exercise each day, and go to some group ballroom dance classes in order to get some human interraction, but it has still been tough.
Tomorrow, I’m planning to go to a temp agency with the hope that I can at least get some simple work, and it looks like the agency might allow me to have some access to inexpensive health insurance. I feel like if I can get access to medication again, I can start looking for work in an earnest way. Wish me luck.
Thank you Wil for posting your story. Recovery frim mental illness is possible. Having a diagnosis doesn’t define who you are. The Soapbox on the old WWDN saved my life, as you know. Live each day as a gift. Cheers! Ahud
I have depression and it’s an incredibly insidious disease, the way it creeps up on you and starts sucking life and joy out of you. I didn’t know how bad I was off until an ex-girlfriend suggested I seek help. I have to take pills everyday and the demons haunt me sometimes but compared to those days, the world is a much better place for me.
I’ve just began to pull out of a 9-month long period of suicidal depression. I’ve been depressed off and on since I was 11. My first suicidal feelings came when I was 13. I’ve been suicidal many times since then, but this last episode was the worst. I just turned 30: I’ve been dealing with this for nearly two-thirds of my life. I was on medication for awhile, but being unemployed with no insurance, I can’t afford it right now. I haven’t had good luck with counselors, so it’s mostly me going through it alone. Well, not alone: I have friends who check on me, make me laugh, remind me constantly that I’m loved, and never stop being there even when I try to make them go away. Without them, I do not think I would still be here.
I don’t know if I’ll make it to my next decade. Heck, I don’t know if I’ll make it to 31. But I do know that there are people I can reach out to, and that increases the odds by a lot.
I’m awed by this post and by the number of replies, people who suffer with depression or know someone who does. I work in mental health, and I can tell you, we all know someone who suffers from depression. Most suffer in silence, afraid of the “You’ve got a good life” syndrome. Many of you know it: What have you got to be upset about? You’ve got a good life. Get up and get out there; you’ll get over it. Or maybe it’s the opposite: You’ve had such a horrible life. It’s no wonder you’re sad. Just don’t think about the past. It’s as if everyone’s story is the same. No one’s story is the same, except that in the sharing of it, we realize that while we are unique, we’re not alone. I work with seniors, 60+, some of whom are shocked as hell to be struggling with mental illness for the first time in their lives, some who’ve had issues and have been in remission, and some who’ve struggled all their lives. They all have one thing in common: they’ve found hope. In the midst of all the chaos, hope has found a way. So thanks, Wil and all of you, for sharing your stories. There is hope here, and some of that is going to find someone who desperately needs it right now.
Depression runs in my family-generations back as far as anyone can remember. I lost my grandpa to suicide. Even with that, you’d think I’d have got a better handle on it earlier in life, but I didn’t. When we moved from Chicago to CA, I made a promise to myself and to my husband that I would ~stay~ on my medication. It has made all the difference. The meds render all of the other things I do to stay healthy much more effective than they’d be otherwise. When my daughter was diagnosed with leukemia, I was so grateful that I had the tools in place so that I could be there for her. She is now healthy and happy, and I’m still on my meds. Thank you for your generosity in sharing your experience with all of us-the dialog in the comments fills me with hope for the future.
I recently discovered your Twitter feed. I marvel at your genuine enjoyment of life and wonder why I don’t enjoy life like I used to? I’ve taken different medications, talked to a psychologist, but years later I’m no better. You and the commenters talk about success with medications. I would love to know which ones have helped. Your post astonished me. To learn that you have suffered from this and are better gives me hope. Again, I would love to know which medications to ask my doctor about.
Everyone’s brain chemistry is different, and only a Psychiatrist can tell you what’s going to work with yours. For me, 5mg of Lexapro, every day, makes all the difference.
Good luck. Don’t give up, and keep working to find something that works for you. In my experience, medication is a huge part of my treatment, but talking therapy was also very, very important. And it isn’t something that magically just fixes you after X number of days; it can take weeks or months, and you may have to change things around after a year or longer. Just don’t give up.
Lexapro has helped me in the past as well, and I’m now on wellbutrin (and I have Ativan for the super anxious days that seem to come on rarer occasion). Talking to a counselor and my doctor also help a lot, as do some cognitive behavioral therapies, which luckily can be looked up online and self taught, and discussed with a therapist as well.
Thank you so much for being brave and telling the world about your illness. Our stories are very similar and when people such as yourself talk openly about Depression and Anxiety it sheds a little more light on something so many people are ashamed to talk about. If more people understood this illness, no one would have to hide it anymore.
Looking back on it, depression really DOES seem to be such a common factor among people. And no one really talks about it, they just assume they are alone and no one cares. I was in the room when I was a teenager and it was freaking terrible. People look at me like I’m insane when I say “yeah, I used to want to die, but I’m fine now.” or “I know what you’re going through and it DOES get better if you let it.” C’est la vie… If you’re unhappy and need a friend, there are loads of us here for you, just click and talk. <3
Also, thank you for sharing this. I likewise ran into depression several years ago. First I noticed that I just had no hope – the world was black, and no amount of “thinking positive” and focusing on the good things would change it. Then I had a full-fledged panic attack – I described what was happening to my wife (who is a therapist), and she looked at me and said “you just about quoted the standard example of a panic attack” and reached for the DSM.
I went on Lexapro for a few years, and it made a world of difference. The world held promise again, and I wasn’t as easily brought down. After a while I managed to wean off of it, but it was absolutely invaluable when I was on it. As my wife pointed out, sometimes medication is necessary before you can even try therapy – if someone is too out of it (from whatever condition) for the therapy to reach them, then it’s not going to be effective.
The phrase that helped me is one from AA (although that’s not from personal experience) – “fake it until you make it”. So I’d go through a day acting normal until I finally felt normal. At that point, I could slowly wean off Lexapro, and it worked.
Life still has its challenges, but I’ve avoided that dark and black place from many years ago.
Thank you for sharing this, Wil. I may never have lost a friend to suicide, but I know where you’re coming from. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder a little less than five years ago, thanks mostly to a musician sharing his journey with BPD and opening my eyes to the symptoms I’ve had all my life. I can only hope that as many people are inspired by this post to seek help as did after Matt Good’s posts. But even if only one person does, that’s one person getting the treatment they need thanks to you.
Thank you for this.
Thank you.
I did meds for years, rotating to different ones when the old stopped working. It’s a common problem for meds. As far as over medicated society, I totally agree. I reached a point of diminishing returns, and now I’m trying out Therapeutic Lifestyle Change. I’d suggest giving it a read. It can work with, or be a replacement for, meds. The book is a bit hokey, but it has some actual research behind it. I may be biased, as my therapist works with the author.
http://www.amazon.com/The-Depression-Cure-Program-without/dp/0738213136
I’m glad to know that even celebrities have problems…people always say “celebrities are just like us”, but I guess it doesn’t mean crap until y’all come out and say things like this.
~*~
I’ve been struggling with depression since I was twelve, but have avoided medication like the plague–I didn’t want it “controlling my brain” and “making me into a robot”. Last year, it all came to a head: I’d been out of work for ten months, I was broke, I’d struggled to get back into school, I’d been having health problems (which were partially related to my stress level)…and then the anticipation of training for a new job gave me a panic attack that scared me so bad, I went to the emergency room. By the next night, I was ready to go. I couldn’t live like that a moment longer. I marched straight into my counselor’s office for my weekly appointment the next day and said, “I want to commit myself.”
When I got out almost a week later, some of my family members lauded it as the best decision I’d ever made. It definitely had an impact on my life…I met people old enough to be my parents who were suffering from depression, people younger than me and learned that there were others on campus (younger than eighteen or older than sixty-five) that were likely going through the same thing. More than that, the psychiatrist and my support team persuaded me to start taking Celexa and it changed my life. My breakthrough moment, though, was a few weeks after I got home: I was talking to my grandma on the phone and she said, “You laughed. I haven’t heard you laugh in weeks.” And I started sobbing.
When I think back to where I was at this time last year, I start crying. I don’t like the woman I was…she was a sad, miserable creature and I never want to be her again. I am more me than I ever was even before age twelve. I never met the true Dayanara Ryelle until perhaps the beginning of this year…and I never, EVER want to let her go.
I’ve had depression and anxiety for nearly all of my life. I believe it started when I was 7 or 8 years old. Just back then I didn’t know what it was.
I’ve also tried to commit suicide twice. Once when I was eleven years old back in ’81. Another time when I was 20 years old after getting out of the Army. Obviously I failed as I’m now 42 years old and writing this.
I don’t make enough money to afford health care. I wish I did as the few people who know of my suffering would would have peace of mind to know I was getting help by seeing someone or with medication.
Although I can’t get the real help I need, I do strongly urge anyone that can to take Wil’s advice.
Wil, thank you for speaking up and not demonizing medication. I know medication isn’t for everyone, but also it is incredibly helpful for some people. I wrote about my struggles with depression just a couple of weeks ago as well. That day I saw three friends post something either on blogs or on facebook about their struggle. http://wilwheaton.net/2012/09/depression-lies/
dangit, wrong link http://www.dreadpiratealice.com/treasure_room/2012/08/29/depression/
I work with mental illness. Professionally. Depression. Study it. Understand it. The way an auto mechanic knows the most innermost workings of a car’s engine. Biochemically. Psychologically. Socially. Can take you places with it that you couldn’t imagine. Your post here is…revealing, but also no surprise. It’s been there in front of you (and us) for a while.
I have depression combined with thyroid cancer, so it seems like I always feel exhausted and don’t want to get out of bed. It’s a struggle for me, but the more I talk about it, the better I feel.