Click to embiggen Marlowe’s report card for today.
I love my adorable puppy, but boy was she an asshole today.
Related
38 thoughts on “Dogshaming Marlowe”
Hm… there seems to be nothing here…
Aha! There it is!!!
These aren’t the dog shaming pictures you’re looking for *waves hand*
awww I can’t believe that sweet little puppy did all those bad things.
Wow. That’s quite a day. I can’t seem to delete my previous comment. : P
Please remember that a dog is only acting out because of what he is given from his master . . . or he he’s really secretly attempting to drive you mad!
Oh, I know. It was rainy today, so she didn’t get her walk this morning and she was acting out a lot.
So you’re saying the dog only did this because he saw Wil eat his own poop, then hit some guy in the nuts? Well, that changes my opinion about this entirely.
Sir I have a feeling that the cat maybe the cause of this. They are planing to kill you.( as all cats do) Trying to get the dog kicked out and there by leave you defenceless.
Look at that adorable face! I’m sure she didn’t mean to do any of those things…
That’s a busy dog. I only did, like, half of those things today.
But… But… That face!
It’s hard to forget the poop eating when they try to make with the face kissing.
The last one is the worst. OW.
She was sure busy! How can you be mad at that cute face!
What I found most interesting was how by the end of the note, your writing got REALLY big… also, I’m sorry if you were the victim of the last item :/
Hmm…I wonder who the guy was what got hit in the nutz?? Hard to believe that cutie can be bad.
Seems absolutely normal. Did Marlowe sign-off on the agreed upon terms of a “good dog”? Maybe we have a “good dog” requirements problem…
How dare you shame that adorable puppy! He ate dog poop to make you proud!
She doesn’t even look upset. hehe
Maybe instead?
“Today my dog saved me from cleaning up her poop, everyone else’s poop, cleaned the dining room table, and uhhhhhhhh,” I can’t find a silver lining for the last one unless someone else was in the room and at least got entertainment out of it. Silver lining. At least you don’t need to clean up dog poop tonight. I’d probably feed her a mint before I kissed her, though. hehe
Cute doggie. I saw someone at the park tonight who made me think of Marlowe. They mostly went *boing boing boing boing* *WHAT WAS THAT?????* *boing boing boing*
Wait a minute…I think there was a mix up. That’s MY two dogs daily agenda…
It may be that dog poop is simply the most sumptuous delicacy imaginable, tastier than earl grey flavored ice cream topped with bacon (which should totally be an actual thing). Empirical evidence is, for obvious reasons, hard to obtain.
Dogs have amazing senses, too. Maybe Marlowe has a “dude needs a nut-check” sense that we humans don’t even have a name for?
Or maybe she’s amused by the funny squeeky noise people make when you do that . . . like a chew toy with the expensive Real Tears ™ option. 🙂
So our puppy is a poop eater as well, and I talked to our vet and she said, “add a little meat tenderizer to her food for a few days and it will discourage her from eating her poop”. So being curious I asked “does the meat tenderizer make the poop taste bad?” and the vet says with a smile “I don’t know, I don’t eat poop!”
Needless to say, I instantly turned red, and told her I guess I should just be happy it works.
My two younger dogs after get report cards that are very similar. It’s a good thing she’s cute, right? Now, my old dog, ever so far from being a pup, added, “Scare mom to death by not eating breakfast, then jump on the couch and act like a puppy again because I’m actually fine but wanted something else for noms today.”
Sigh. Those silly beasts.Wouldn’t trade ’em, but some days… 😉
My puppy, Cody, does that last one all the time. To me. As his greeting. It’s all a matter of their aiming abilities. And a shark with a laser beam on its head isn’t as accurate as he is.
As for those others, I blame the cats. You may love them, and as they have been there longer, have some form of seniority over Marlowe, everyone knows cats love to mind-fuck everything.
We rescued our Aussie/Golden mix, he’s now 8 months, and have been going through similar growing pains. Thankfully he hasn’t eaten his own poo, but he did gleefully rub his face on another dog’s poo. Most days my pup is the most adorable, fluffiest,and nubbin-est of pups but other days…Man, I can’t even lay down catch up on the world for 5 minutes before he’s getting into something he’s not supposed to. It’s still worth every minute though.
I can relate,
I have a little male Jack Russell and yesterday when I got home there were accident bombs everywhere. I was so pissed but it’s forgivable. He’s a terror but I love him.
I puppysat for my parents the other day, and I caught him digging in the litter box. I fussed at him and chased him out. Then last night I scooped the litter, and found half a dog biscuit! I thought he was looking for a treat, but instead he was hiding one. He’s…not getting that back.
“poop”…. my friend’s doggy eat’s the cat’s poop. Those great sniffers can smell the undigested food. Hmmmm… guess I’ll start that diet now. blach….
Marlowe’s report card for Wil
___ Was a good human
X Yelled at me for picking up poop (humans pick it up, I just don’t have hands and baggies!)
X Yelled at me for chasing the cat, who had just run across the table
X Got in the way of my happy dance causing me to hit him in the nuts
X Didn’t give me dried salmon treats.
I can’t look at her and not think…awe…”who’s a good puppy”
-side note…I know you use beer smith for your home brew recipes…have you seen their new app for android (and possibly apple, I have not looked). It’s killer and really helpful.
Time to call Cesar?
Feeling your pain… My best friend is bringing in dead birds… the birds my partner feeds…. and she is very unhappy with said feline… ever tried to shame a cat? They have none.
On an unrelated note, thanks for whitelisting me so quickly Wil. You Rock!
For a dog that has such nice handwriting, you would think he would better behaved.
It’s kinda amusing that when dogs are dogshamed, they tend to *look* shamed. When cats are catshamed, they tend to look completely unimpressed.
Or smugly satisfied.
Yeah, that last one is not okay? I mean, I do that sometimes too. Some people just deserve a slam to the nuts…the guy was probably asking for it. Good dog?!
You so lie. That dog is sweet and completely innocent. I can tell by that face.
Hm… there seems to be nothing here…
Aha! There it is!!!
These aren’t the dog shaming pictures you’re looking for *waves hand*
awww I can’t believe that sweet little puppy did all those bad things.
Wow. That’s quite a day. I can’t seem to delete my previous comment. : P
Please remember that a dog is only acting out because of what he is given from his master . . . or he he’s really secretly attempting to drive you mad!
Oh, I know. It was rainy today, so she didn’t get her walk this morning and she was acting out a lot.
So you’re saying the dog only did this because he saw Wil eat his own poop, then hit some guy in the nuts? Well, that changes my opinion about this entirely.
Sir I have a feeling that the cat maybe the cause of this. They are planing to kill you.( as all cats do) Trying to get the dog kicked out and there by leave you defenceless.
Look at that adorable face! I’m sure she didn’t mean to do any of those things…
That’s a busy dog. I only did, like, half of those things today.
But… But… That face!
It’s hard to forget the poop eating when they try to make with the face kissing.
The last one is the worst. OW.
She was sure busy! How can you be mad at that cute face!
What I found most interesting was how by the end of the note, your writing got REALLY big… also, I’m sorry if you were the victim of the last item :/
Hmm…I wonder who the guy was what got hit in the nutz?? Hard to believe that cutie can be bad.
Seems absolutely normal. Did Marlowe sign-off on the agreed upon terms of a “good dog”? Maybe we have a “good dog” requirements problem…
How dare you shame that adorable puppy! He ate dog poop to make you proud!
She doesn’t even look upset. hehe
Maybe instead?
“Today my dog saved me from cleaning up her poop, everyone else’s poop, cleaned the dining room table, and uhhhhhhhh,” I can’t find a silver lining for the last one unless someone else was in the room and at least got entertainment out of it. Silver lining. At least you don’t need to clean up dog poop tonight. I’d probably feed her a mint before I kissed her, though. hehe
Cute doggie. I saw someone at the park tonight who made me think of Marlowe. They mostly went *boing boing boing boing* *WHAT WAS THAT?????* *boing boing boing*
Wait a minute…I think there was a mix up. That’s MY two dogs daily agenda…
It may be that dog poop is simply the most sumptuous delicacy imaginable, tastier than earl grey flavored ice cream topped with bacon (which should totally be an actual thing). Empirical evidence is, for obvious reasons, hard to obtain.
Dogs have amazing senses, too. Maybe Marlowe has a “dude needs a nut-check” sense that we humans don’t even have a name for?
Or maybe she’s amused by the funny squeeky noise people make when you do that . . . like a chew toy with the expensive Real Tears ™ option. 🙂
So our puppy is a poop eater as well, and I talked to our vet and she said, “add a little meat tenderizer to her food for a few days and it will discourage her from eating her poop”. So being curious I asked “does the meat tenderizer make the poop taste bad?” and the vet says with a smile “I don’t know, I don’t eat poop!”
Needless to say, I instantly turned red, and told her I guess I should just be happy it works.
My two younger dogs after get report cards that are very similar. It’s a good thing she’s cute, right? Now, my old dog, ever so far from being a pup, added, “Scare mom to death by not eating breakfast, then jump on the couch and act like a puppy again because I’m actually fine but wanted something else for noms today.”
Sigh. Those silly beasts.Wouldn’t trade ’em, but some days… 😉
My puppy, Cody, does that last one all the time. To me. As his greeting. It’s all a matter of their aiming abilities. And a shark with a laser beam on its head isn’t as accurate as he is.
As for those others, I blame the cats. You may love them, and as they have been there longer, have some form of seniority over Marlowe, everyone knows cats love to mind-fuck everything.
We rescued our Aussie/Golden mix, he’s now 8 months, and have been going through similar growing pains. Thankfully he hasn’t eaten his own poo, but he did gleefully rub his face on another dog’s poo. Most days my pup is the most adorable, fluffiest,and nubbin-est of pups but other days…Man, I can’t even lay down catch up on the world for 5 minutes before he’s getting into something he’s not supposed to. It’s still worth every minute though.
I can relate,
I have a little male Jack Russell and yesterday when I got home there were accident bombs everywhere. I was so pissed but it’s forgivable. He’s a terror but I love him.
I puppysat for my parents the other day, and I caught him digging in the litter box. I fussed at him and chased him out. Then last night I scooped the litter, and found half a dog biscuit! I thought he was looking for a treat, but instead he was hiding one. He’s…not getting that back.
“poop”…. my friend’s doggy eat’s the cat’s poop. Those great sniffers can smell the undigested food. Hmmmm… guess I’ll start that diet now. blach….
Marlowe’s report card for Wil
___ Was a good human
X Yelled at me for picking up poop (humans pick it up, I just don’t have hands and baggies!)
X Yelled at me for chasing the cat, who had just run across the table
X Got in the way of my happy dance causing me to hit him in the nuts
X Didn’t give me dried salmon treats.
I can’t look at her and not think…awe…”who’s a good puppy”
-side note…I know you use beer smith for your home brew recipes…have you seen their new app for android (and possibly apple, I have not looked). It’s killer and really helpful.
Time to call Cesar?
Feeling your pain… My best friend is bringing in dead birds… the birds my partner feeds…. and she is very unhappy with said feline… ever tried to shame a cat? They have none.
On an unrelated note, thanks for whitelisting me so quickly Wil. You Rock!
For a dog that has such nice handwriting, you would think he would better behaved.
It’s kinda amusing that when dogs are dogshamed, they tend to *look* shamed. When cats are catshamed, they tend to look completely unimpressed.
Or smugly satisfied.
Yeah, that last one is not okay? I mean, I do that sometimes too. Some people just deserve a slam to the nuts…the guy was probably asking for it. Good dog?!
You so lie. That dog is sweet and completely innocent. I can tell by that face.