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50,000 Monkeys at 50,000 Typewriters Can't Be Wrong

Guest Post by Ryan Wheaton: Lawst Balloon, Part Two

  • Fiction
  • Ryan Wheaton

Ryan Wheaton is an aspiring fiction writer and graphic novelist. He’s been trying to grow a beard too. So there’s that.

(This piece was written in response to a prompt “about a lost balloon.” Part one appears here.)

“Fiona, please,” her mother said. “We’re already late and we don’t want to upset your Grandf—,” a trumpet cracked over an unseen intercom.

“Well, would you look at that,” a voice called out. “My, my, my, my, MY what a beautiful girl. You’ve grown up quite a bit my little Potato.” Fiona’s eyes widened in utter confusion.

“Honey, look up there,” her mother crouched down and pointed at a factory window. A dusted silhouette of a man waved frantically.

“My word, you’re even more majestic than I remembered. Please, please, come in, come in.” The trumpet sounded once more as the man disappeared from the window. Not a second later, a small hatchway swung out from the middle of the monstrous steel doors. Fiona stepped back as her mother dropped her hand and rushed forward. A balsa-framed man shuffled under the half-sized door frame and popped upright.

“Hello, hello, hellOOO,” he said, spinning in place.

“Oh, Grandfather. It’s been far too long,” Fiona’s mother said, bent halfway down, and embraced him. Her shoulder smashed into his nose and jostled his small spectacles.

“Oof,” he said.

Fiona hadn’t moved an inch forward and, in fact, had been slowly tip-toeing her way back to the car. She hoped that the displacement of her Grandfather’s glasses by her mother’s clumsy shoulders would allow her to flee beneath the cover of temporarily muddled vision.

“Fiona,” her mother said. “Fiona, get over here this second and give you Grandfather a hello and a hug.”

Fiona stopped mid-tip and set her toe back to the earth.

“Excuse me, young lady.” It was once her mother resorted to florid address that she knew any objection led only to public abjection. “Fiona Loreli Lawst, you turn right around, march over here, and give your Grandfather a hello and a hug immediately!”

Fiona grumbled before contorting her furrowed face into a plasticine smile.

“Hello Grandfather!” She curtsied before skipping toward him with a stomach full of molten disdain. Despite requiring a pink and purple step stool to reach most anything, Fiona’s Grandfather needn’t kneel nor crouch to greet her. Rather, he bent slightly at the waist and patted her head.

With his eyes squinted and a contented grin he said, “A happy hello to you, my sweet Potato.”

The blurred frantics of her mother’s hand signed, “hug hug hug!” Fiona begrudgingly leaned forward in the hopes this singular hug might suffice for any future expectations of expressed affection, but she groped only air. He had walked away.

“Come now, we have a few things to see, some things to do, and much, MUCH fun to be had. Now,” the double-steel doors howled on their hinges as he continued. “Now, I know it may not appear as ample in amusement on the outside,” his voice trailed a bit as he swung into a shadowed recess on the left wall. Fiona heard crunching gears and clacking buttons. Her mother stood beside her, clapping with anticipation. “… but, aren’t we taught never to,” he trailed off once more. Blue and red lights spun against the furthest wall while whistles and horns screeched and bonked. Her mother squeaked as she bounced in place barely able to keep herself contained. “… a book by her cover,” Grandfather bellowed. He cartwheeled out from behind his magic curtain cheering and dancing as the ceiling almost thirty feet above shattered into thousands of balloons that cascaded onto them in a kaleidoscopic hail storm. The stone wall they faced groaned as it began tottering and teetering. Fiona vaulted back as the immense slab slammed into the ground enveloping her in a cloud of soot and sand. Her mother wailed in delight. Tears sprinted from her eyes as she collapsed in ecstasy.

“It’s… it’s more wonderful, more exquisite than I recall,” her mother choked through tears. Her Grandfather rested his hand on her trembling shoulder. She whirled about, still on her knees, clasping his hand in both of hers.

“May — may I please,” she begged.

“Of course, my dear. There has never been a time you weren’t welcome to come back,” he beamed. She rose, still clutching his hand, “Thank you, oh thank you, Grandfather,” she stammered. “Fiona, Fiona, oh my sweet Fiona. You must come see. You must,” her mother’s eyes were shiny with hysteria.

“Go on, my dear. Fiona and I will only be a moment.” Grandfather removed a handkerchief from within his jacket and handed it to Fiona, “Here little Potato, wipe the dust from your eyes.” She gratefully took it and rubbed with ferocity. Through the cloudy sting and wobble of teardrops, her eyes refocused just as her mother vanished into the mass of dancing, flashing, laughing, singing, and spinning that had revealed itself. It was a golden-glazed paradise. It was in that moment Fiona understood that any prospect of happiness fate had attentively and thoughtfully laid out for the remainder of her life had been stomped out, extinguished, utterly ruined by comparison to the raw bliss that now ensnared her.

Her Grandfather rested his chin on her shoulder and whispered, “Breathtaking, isn’t it?”

 

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28 February, 2014 Ryan Wheaton

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Guest Post by Will Hindmarch: The Record → ← Guest Post by Shane Nickerson: Old and Stinky

20 thoughts on “Guest Post by Ryan Wheaton: Lawst Balloon, Part Two”

  1. Anna Fruen (@Thiefree) says:
    28 February, 2014 at 4:52 pm

    Yay! Oh, I like him. I’ve read lately about parents refusing to make their children hug people, and I think it’s wonderful, I suspect he’s of the same opinion. Maybe I’m projecting a little there :p

  2. Mike says:
    28 February, 2014 at 6:54 pm

    Who the hell is Ryan?

    1. Ryan Wheaton says:
      28 February, 2014 at 7:02 pm

      *cries

      1. NWSmiley says:
        28 February, 2014 at 10:25 pm

        /comfort

    2. Martin says:
      28 February, 2014 at 8:23 pm

      Wheaton, Son of Wheaton.

    3. J says:
      2 March, 2014 at 8:20 pm

      After that, you only want to know who??? Great works come from many people. If you want a glimps into some awesome works, start looking into the “who’s not who” collection of works…

    4. Jack says:
      3 March, 2014 at 9:37 pm

      Some douche with a half beard

  3. Minyassa says:
    28 February, 2014 at 8:00 pm

    I really like it, very emotionally evocative and good at painting mental images. But I advise against a beard for writers, beards root into the bottom of your brain and all the best words drain out through your chin. 😉

  4. Wesley Nixon (@NewOnyxIsle) says:
    28 February, 2014 at 8:33 pm

    Uh, don’t tell Wil, but you might just surpass him as a writer, and I’m a big fan of his writing.
    Actually, you know what? He seems like the kind of dad (the best kind) that would revel in such an appraisal of both your talents.
    Just don’t gloat too much.

  5. Madman says:
    28 February, 2014 at 9:25 pm

    Follow your dream Ryan, much better than sitting in a prairie dog farm 8+ hours a day.

  6. chinkledc says:
    28 February, 2014 at 9:56 pm

    I’m so glad the earlier story had a second part… it makes far more sense now. Very good.

  7. Daniel says:
    1 March, 2014 at 4:56 am

    Have you ever considered losing weight?

  8. J says:
    2 March, 2014 at 8:39 pm

    Great writing! Leaves me two images of possible lagacies… Fantastic and I want a conclusion!!!

  9. beth9133 says:
    3 March, 2014 at 8:51 am

    Well, you could just end it here. Or not. Whatcha gonna do? Will you post it here?
    My favorite sentence: “Fiona understood that any prospect of happiness fate had attentively and thoughtfully laid out for the remainder of her life had been stomped out, extinguished, utterly ruined by comparison to the raw bliss that now ensnared her.”

  10. Ryan Wheaton says:
    3 March, 2014 at 11:36 am

    I think there’s probably 2 more parts to it. And, maybe here? I’ll let you know soon!

  11. Maureen from StL (@MaureenD_2014) says:
    4 March, 2014 at 1:44 pm

    Yeah, it was kind of depressing at the end of part 1.

  12. Wil says:
    4 March, 2014 at 2:01 pm

    It’s easily a 3/4 beard.

  13. Magda says:
    4 March, 2014 at 2:17 pm

    Please, sir, may I have some more?

  14. WearySky says:
    12 March, 2014 at 8:51 am

    Wait – is it Fiona’s grandfather? Or her mother’s grandfather? I am confuse.

  15. Josh says:
    31 March, 2014 at 3:28 pm

    I actually read this out of order starting with the second half by mistake. I then read the first part but actually I really liked the ambiguousness I was experiencing after having read only the 2nd part.

    Ryan’s writing voice or style is pretty good. One critique would be to not get carried away with adjectives. For example “a stomach full of molten disdain.” might possibly be stronger without molten in it.

    Good Job and good luck with the beard.

Comments are closed.

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