Normally, I’m pretty good with words. At the moment, I’m not at my best, for reasons I hope are self evident. However, I’m going to do my best to remember someone who gave more to my life than he ever knew.
I never got to know Leonard Nimoy the way my fellow cast members did, so I can’t remember him in the personal way that they can. I didn’t know Leonard as a friend, or even as a colleague. I can’t tell you what he was like off the set, because I never had the privilege of visiting with him off the set. In fact, by the time he worked on Next Generation, my character was off exploring other planes of existence, and I was a nineteen year-old kid who was stumbling around, trying to figure out what he was going to do with the rest of his life.
When you are part of the Star Trek family — and that’s what it is, in ways that are as wonderful and complicated as all families are — you are part of a very small and special group, where news travels fast. Though I never got to be close to Leonard, I knew that he was a wonderful and lovely man, because that’s all anyone ever said about him. I feel that I haven’t earned the right to eulogize him, but a lot of people are asking me to, so if you’ll allow me a few minutes of your time, I’d like to do my best to remember Leonard the way most of us will be remembering him today: as the actor who played a character who was deeply important to all of our lives, because everyone who watched and loved Star Trek is part of our extended family.
When I was a kid, long before I put on Wesley Crusher’s sweaters or piloted the Enterprise, I loved Star Trek. I watched it all the time in syndication on our black and white television, and when the other kids at school wanted to play CHiPs or the A-Team on the playground, I wanted to turn the jungle gym into the Enterprise. On those rare occasions that I convinced my classmates that we were boldly going toward new worlds on lunch recess, one of the Cool Kids would claim the role of Captain Kirk, and I would always happily assume the role of Mister Spock.
I was too young to fully understand why, but as I got older and looked back on those years, it became clear: I identified with Spock because he was weird, and cerebral, and he was different from everyone else. He was just like me, but the things that made me a target of ridicule on the playground made him a valuable and vital member of his ship’s crew. In ways that I couldn’t articulate at the time, I wanted to be Mister Spock because if I was, I could be myself –quiet, bookish, alien to the people around me — and it wouldn’t be weird. It would be awesome.
When I was cast to play Wesley Crusher, and became part of the Star Trek family, one of the first things I got excited about was meeting Mister Spock, and the actor who played him. It never happened, really, so I never got to know the man behind the ears and the eyebrows and the character that meant so much to me. But as I said on Twitter this morning, we in the Next Generation stood upon his shoulders, and we got to explore a universe that wouldn’t have existed without him. I’ve met thousands of people over the last decade, who have told me that Wesley Crusher meant the same thing to them that Mister Spock meant to me, and for that I am eternally grateful to everyone who was part of Star Trek before I was, including Leonard.
Mister Spock made it okay for me to be the weird kid who eventually grew into a slightly-less weird adult, but it was Leonard Nimoy who made Mister Spock live, and who made Star Trek — and every science fiction TV series since 1966 — possible.
Thank you, Leonard, for making it okay to be me, and for making it possible for me to explore brave new worlds, and boldly go where you had gone before. I wish I’d gotten to know you the way so many others did, because everyone says you were as awesome and wonderful as I hoped you would be. Rest in peace, sir.
Permission is granted to reprint this post in part or in full, provided credit and a link back is included.
From one kid Spock to another, thanks for this.
Well said! He lived long and made us all prosper!
So eloquently put. Thank you for sharing this with us on such a sad day, Wil. You are a kind and incredibly wonderful soul.
Thanks Wil for your words. I read the bad news in Austria’s online news and got very sad. I met Mr. Nimoy once at a ST convention in Germany, long time ago. I will miss him very much. He was one of the best. LLAP
So precious, your words and heart. Thank you. I grew up the weird kid, too. 🙂
My heart is broken this morning. He is missed.
LLAP
Thank you Mr. Wheaton, your words for the late, GREAT Leonard Nimoy moved me to tears. As you said, Mr. Nimoy was incredible. He blessed everything he did with that hint of flair that only he had.
He was one of the greatest voice actors I’ve seen in a video game. Whether it be for Galvatron (Transformers of 1986), or as one Master Xahanort of the kingdom Hearts series, and a great actor on screens large and small
I heard the news in an item on BBC Radio 4 (which is a major deal in UK radio station terms) this morning, where I also heard you giving a tribute to Mr Nimoy that echoes what you said here.
I am glad he is getting such widespread respect, it seems right and fitting to make space for news about the good people in the world, even if that has to come at the end of their lives. RIP.
Everyone’s comments are so inspiring. Thank you.
Beautiful.
Perfect. You articulated what so many are feeling but are unable to express.
My personal indicator for a good book or well written text in general, is that I feel more and more uncomfortable when reaching towards the end, knowing soon great moments of “mind-cinema” will be over.
This post had a similar effect on me – thanks Wil!
I am one of the many whose lives have been touched by Leonard Nimoy and his portrayal of Spock. At the time Star Trek was on the air, I was a young child living through horrific parental abuse. I could see no way out other than suicide. My first attempt involved riding my tricycle down a steep flight of concrete steps.
When I discovered Mr. Spock, I was struck by his emotional control in difficult situations, his intelligence, his courage, and his adherence to logic. No problem on Star Trek could be unsolvable as long as Mr. Spock was around. My own intelligence contributed to my isolation; nobody understood me and the other kids called me “that scientific kid”. Like Spock, I experienced discrimination and prejudice as well. Being brutalized by your own family and ostracized by the rest of humanity tends to strip the logic from your life.
During the worst moments, I learned to take refuge through emotional self-control, as abusers feed on the reaction of their victims. Not reacting can make them give up and go away. I learned to put what was happening to me in a logical perspective, which helped me to take back a sense of control and a sense of hope.
Spock’s example helped me to get through my childhood, and no other actor could have portrayed him in the way Leonard Nimoy did. I can honestly say that if it weren’t for Mr. Nimoy, I wouldn’t be alive today.
Thank goodness he was there for you and you found the strength to survive.
That’s some powerful stuff, there, cattipat! To be posted on such a touching remembrance of an extremely talented artist makes it even more so.
Thank you for sharing such personal data. I know there are some who would look down on someone willing to bring such tragedies to light, but I, for one, commend you!
That’s terrible. I hope you have supportive people you can depend on now.
That was beautiful, Wil. I think you did exactly what you said: remembered him the way many of us geeks do. Thank you.
That was incredible, sir. Thank you so much for so articulately expressing what many of us are feeling.
Thank you Sir…that was wonderful…..
thank you, everyone for the expressions of grief. they help.
Thanks for sharing this, Wil.
Wil, This is an excellent and thoughtful piece which helped me to reflect on all the reasons that I am grieving Mr. Nemoy’s death. Thank you. Many years ago, I emailed you in response to an article in which you were “dissing” your Wesley Crusher character and urged you to reconsider in light of Wesley’s (and your) positive impact on nerdy boys. Glad to see you have done so! Thanks for your word also.
and by “Nemoy” I mean “Nimoy”
Well said Wil, well said.
Wil, you’re my favourite writer. Thank you.
Perfect eulogy Will, thank you for sharing.
Very kind thoughts and words on a wonderful legend. I come from a family that watched and talked about Star Trek on a daily basis. I grew up with The Next Generation in the ’80’s/’90’s. My heart broke when I read of Mr. Nimoy’s passing. He just seemed like he would have been everyone’s friend. What a truly great man he was.
What a lovely tribute!
Great post. I really share the same sentiments, as a weird, cerebral kid growing up.
I was fortunate to watch Star Trek: TOS “live” when it first aired on TV oh so long ago. When I was on the playground I wanted to be a Vulcan Scotty (and I did grow up to be an engineer). I too was that weird kid on the playground but being a girl made it that much weirder. Years later when I watched Star Trek: NG, I enjoyed watching YOU, a young kid who got to be a member of the crew.
We have now lost 4 of the original cast and with each passing we reflect on how they have all impacted our lives.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences.
You managed to sum up so many of our childhoods. He was such a large impact on so many lives I bet he never imagined playing a character on a sci fi show would affect the world. I feel somewhat sad that I don’t remember him for more roles but Spock helped me survive so much when I was younger. I know my life would have taken a far different darker path if it wasn’t for his inspiration. Luckly his legacy will live on past us all.. He really truly did live long and prosper.. And even though I never met him he has been and always will be my friend.
i was 11 when TOS was first on. my most prized possession was the TV Guide issue with Kirk and Spock on the cover. i, too, played “star trek” with my friends (we used my dads old Chevy). they always wanted to be kirk. i was always spock. never occurred to me that being, you know, a GIRL, made a difference in any way. i became an IT person, running systems for a major university. who’s to say…? LLAP.
wav added by moi 😉 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dungeons_%26_Dragons
Leonard was great! When I recently read “I am Spock”, I was floored to learn the true extent of his brilliance. We all have lost a good friend. Actor, director, producer and icon……this world lost out yesterday and I am heartbroken. Fair Winds and Following Sea’s to you. Thanks for the memories………………..
Is it weird that right after I read the crushing news that Leonard Nimoy was no longer with us, I immediately started looking for a response from Wil Wheaton? I knew I would find catharsis in his (your) words to help with the grief—and so I did, thanks so much.
I didn’t discover Mr. Nimoy and Mr. Spock till I was 26, but my fiancee (who has related strongly to his character since childhood) and I fell in love while watching Star Trek. The “pon farr” episode fell right on our first Valentine’s Day. I loved and felt inspired by the deep fellowship of Kirk, Spock, and McCoy and their real life counterparts. From your anecdotes, I could say the same for the real and fictional fellowships of Picard, Riker, and Wesley—the compassionate, nerdy, outspoken Trek character that I related to most. LLAP, everyone.
Well said Will…well said.
Wil, t hank you for these beautiful words. I can tell they came straight from your heart. Leonard Nimoy was so important to so very many of us, showing us that it’s okay to be a bit weird, that it’s okay to be out of the norm, and Wesley Crusher did the same for a different generation. I was only a preschooler when Star Trek (TOS) was on the air, but Star Trek has been a large part of my life for decades, mostly because of that “It’s okay to be yourself, even if those around you think your self is weird” moral of the vision of Gene Roddenberry. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us on this sad occasion.
This is exactly, 100% how I felt about Mister Spock. Thank you for writing this. I never met the man but spent much of Friday in tears. What a legacy Leonard has left us. He will be sorely missed.
Thank you for sharing this, Wil.
unreal llap
Well said, Wes. I mean Wil.
Thank you Wil. He will be missed by us all, greatly.
dammit, man, i hadn’t cried yet, and then here you are with your brilliant articulation of why leonard nimoy and mr spock were so important.
he not only made it okay to be logical, when he published his photo book called ‘full body project” he helped make it beautiful to be a fat woman as well.
i so rarely get the opportunity to thank the person who made me cry.
so, thank you, wil.
Va’Pak. Tushah nash-veh k’odu. Nufau au sochya – yi dungi ma tu sochya. Nemaiyo. Sochya eh dif. Mene sakkhet ur-seveh.
You did Mr. Nimoy and yourself Proud….from one weird kid to another
Well said, Wil Wheaton.
Thank you, man
You did that good.
Beautiful man, well done.
Well done, Wil, well done. This was a great way to remember Mr.Nimoy.
I remember when I got to see the movie Star Trek II, when Spock dies. My face was covered in tears, and so many on the audience were shocked as well, because he was such a personal hero for many of us that his cinematic death was heartfelt as genuine. The real departure of Mr. Nimoy has left us without the hope of his resurrection, but his memory and exemplary humanity will remain forever in our minds. He will always be my friend.
Wil – I have to admit that my recollections of you on NG were “Eh, just another child actor”, but I’m a crusty old barnacle who witnessed TOS live and in color (just barely as we got our first color TV in 1965) starting with the pilot episode in 1966. It was a revelation and a true turning point in my life – after a lot of hard academic (at the current version of Starfleet Academy, the Naval Academy) and professional work I became Scotty the engineer, Kirk the leading officer, and Spock the ever-logical scientist and complete nerd with suppressed emotions.
It never occurred to me that you were one of Us, the Few, the Proud, the Eternally Unshaven … boldly going where no one has gone before because, damn it, it’s so interesting, even when it’s potentially deadly, physically or emotionally. Thanks for your sentiments about Leonard – I’m convinced he would be extremely gracious in his approval of everything you wrote. The great thing about being a nerd is that we’re special because we understand each other without a word even needing to be said. What you wrote is beautiful and I shed tears … I’m really glad you took the time to do it.
Just Joe Blow
Bless your heart. I too was the odd man out all my life, but unlike you I was not smart. In fact my blood father made it painfully clear he thought me STUPID, STUPID, STUPID in a very angry and clear voice when I was thirteen, however I was too stupid to know how stupid I truly was and therefore able to prove I was not only not stupid I was an amazing person through a series of naive fuck-ups that would lead me through my own adventure of a life time. I would like to add one thing to your respectfully and loving thoughts to Mr. Nimoy. When my sister was a young girl she had the pleasure of meeting both the stars of Star Trek. Mr. Nimoy took great care in meeting the children and took the time to talk to each child and gave them more than just his name on a picture. He was a good man who made everybody feel special and that is why you never heard a bad thing about him. But then you already know that.
Will, thanks for sharing. Leonard was a meaningful part of our journey.