Jesus what a day.
Apparently, a couple of exceptionally popular YouTube creators were talking on Twitter about being blocked by me. Their fans grabbed their jump to conclusions mats, torches and pitchforks in hand, and went on a rampage through my mentions.
So I guess it’s time for the obligatory blog post that I don’t want to write but need to write, about how I use social media.
First off: I think I know what happened in this case. A couple months (or maybe it was weeks; in 2018, hours can feel like days) ago, a toxic YouTube personality with a large and unsurprisingly toxic following just went after me one day, without provocation. Over the years, people have tried to create the illusion of a feud with me, in an effort to get my attention and grab some free publicity to drive up views and subscriptions. I always ignore these things, because they are childish at best, and they invite a kind of negativity and vitriol that I would prefer not to have in my life. (As a side note, if someone claiming to be a social media expert pitches the fake feud idea to you, fire them and burn their contact information to the ground. That person is an idiot.)
Anyway. This person already had a following that eclipsed mine by several a factor of at least ten, so they weren’t going to gain anything if I gave them the attention they were looking for. It honestly felt like a young person who was feeling powerful and wanted to use the power of their following to make my life miserable, to entertain the shitty people who follow them. In my efforts to be empathetic to this person, I will freely admit that, when I was in my teens or early twenties, I probably would have thought that what they were doing was harmless, and that the person who was being attacked and dogpiled probably deserved it for some reason, and that they shouldn’t take everything so seriously. Thankfully, I grew up and out of that mentality.
So awhile ago, when this person turned my Twitter mentions into a goddamn Nazi rally, I did a little work to track down patient zero. I found this person, blocked their account, and then blocked their followers, so they would lose one of their attack vectors. I freely accept that a lot of innocent people were caught up in this massive blocking, and many of them are YouTube personalities (because it appears that, at some point, an explicit or implicit agreement was made among YouTubers that a lot of them would follow each other on social media. I wonder why good and decent people would follow this toxic person, but that’s on them, not on me.) In the aftermath, a lot of these YouTube personalities have, at some point, made a bunch of noise about being blocked by me. “Oh why did this happen,” they wonder, “I’ve never interacted with this guy. Please tell me, dear followers who worship me, whatever did I do to deserve this great injustice.”
Real quick: In this example, I present the imagined locutor as acting in bad faith, but can sincerely relate to that feeling. From time to time, someone I know and like RTs someone, but I can’t see it because I’ve been blocked by that person. I usually a have a little bit of a sad, because most of the time that person who has blocked me is someone I would like to see on Twitter, but I don’t pitch a fit about it, because I am a goddamn adult, and they don’t owe me anything.
I have said this on Twitter in a thread before, but I don’t think I’ve said it here: if you think you were wrongly or inadvertently blocked by me on Twitter, I’m painfully easy to get in touch with so you can ask about it and get it removed. Like, you certainly don’t have to, but you can if you want to. If you throw a fit about it and send your followers after me, you’ve made me feel like I don’t regret blocking you by accident. If you do this thing that people do where they are just asking about it and don’t really mean anything wink wink (sealioning), I don’t regret blocking you by accident. I want everyone to understand that Twitter is a mess, because Jack is a terrible CEO and doesn’t act like he cares at all about limiting Nazis, trolls, Russian bots, and other bad people. I believe that he doesn’t care because every single time someone or some group of people work hard to solve his problem (which is all of our problem) for him, he treats it like a public relations problem, not a systemic problem on the platform he runs, that is making the world a worse place due to his inaction. Because Twitter does not make it easy to manage and reduce attacks and other bad acts, we have to rely on imperfect tools like shared blocklists, extensions that help us identify and block trolls and bots, and tools that do mass blockings of an account’s followers. I’ve said many times, it’s a blunt and messy and imperfect instrument. It’s a nuclear bomb where what’s really needed is a rapier, but we go to war with the tools we have. Thanks for nothing, Jack. I hope you believe that the money you are earning is worth the damage you are inflicting on the world, and I hope you sleep really well at night.
Back to this morning. My mentions turn into this morass of anime avatars, poor grammar and racist, bigoted attacks. So, as I said above, I felt like I didn’t particularly care that I blocked these people, if this is the way the people they attract behave. If you attract a lot of bigots and trolls, you may just be a bigot and a troll, goes the math.
But that’s where I think, hey, maybe things are a little more complex than that. Because when multiple millions of people follow a person, that person can’t be reasonably held to account for everything every one of those followers does. Sure, there’s the glaring and profound exception of people who encourage and condone terrible behavior because they engage in it themselves, but most of us who have large audiences are going to end up with a few bad folks in that audience, because of math and human psychology. A few people who follow and/or know these guys reached out and said, essentially, “hey, these guys are good people and knowing what I know about you, I think you’d probably get along in regular circumstances. Please don’t let a small representation of their audience affect the way you feel about them.” I will admit and own that I can intellectually agree with that statement entirely, while emotionally struggling to be as graceful as I’d like to be in my idealized self.
Part of me really wants to unblock these people, because they seem like genuinely good people who exercised poor judgment. Another part of me doesn’t want to reward bad behavior. The biggest part of me believes that in about 18 hours nobody will care about this and they’ll go back to rolling in towers of YouTube cash, forgetting that I ever existed.
So I don’t know what I’m going to do in this instance, but since I’m spending the time writing about it, I want to make the following points very clear, so I have something to point to the next time this happens:
- I actually use Twitter and other social platforms the way people use them. I’m not a hashtag brand who doesn’t care. I’m a real person who really looks at mentions and stuff. I’ve said it before: if you cut me, I will bleed.
- Nobody is entitled to my time and attention. Yes, I block thousands of people on Twitter, because it’s that bad for me on Twitter. Yes, I block lots of people who I’ve never talked to and never will talk to. Usually, that’s because they’ve announced to the world that they’re garbage by following a garbage account that trolls and bullies and attacks people. Occasionally, it’s a mistake, and when that mistake is brought to my attention in a mature and respectful way, I do my best to correct it.
- Chris Hardwick gave me great advice that I’m going to paraphrase here. He said that when you’re interacting with a person, and your first reaction is GO FUCK YOURSELF, think about all the times you’ve wanted to unleash Hell on someone, but three or four or seven messages later, you can talk like people and move on with your lives. Hardwick says that he does his best to start out at that seventh message, so he doesn’t blow up at someone in a way he’ll regret. I do my best to follow this advice, but I admit and own that when something like tearing children away from their parents is the issue at hand, I don’t have any patience or understanding or acceptance of someone who is anything other than sickened and outraged and horrified by it. There’s never gonna be a seventh message with that person, because that person holds beliefs that are reprehensible to me. But when someone is pissed about a joke they didn’t like on Big Bang Theory or thinks I ruined tabletop gaming by making it more accessible, or has taken a friendly sports rivalry too far, it’s a lot easier to get to that seventh message.
- When Twitter treats abuse as a serious, systemic, societal issue with real consequences, and not as a public relations challenge, all of this will change. Until then, I will continue to use clumsy and blunt instruments to make my experience on the platform as nontoxic as possible. In other words, I’d love to use a lightsaber, but right now, I only have a blaster at my side.
- Remember that there’s a real person on the other side of your social media interactions. This is especially important for young people, because there is not a person alive who can hurt and be hurt like a teenager. I promise you that you’re going to get older, and you’re going to be mortified by the terrible things you did when you know that you should have known better. If I blocked SuperYouTube6969 and you think they’re the greatest thing since memes, don’t take it personally. I can assure you that it has nothing to do with you.
- Let’s all do our best to start out at the seventh message.
- If you’re a creator with a large audience, whether you like it or not you have a tremendous responsibility, and you have an incredible opportunity to decide if you’re going to use that audience to enrich yourself, or if you’re going to use the privilege you have to make the world a better place. How do you want to be remembered?
- As always, don’t be a dick.
I know there’s more I want to say, but I have a raging headache right now and what I really want to be doing is working on my novel, so that’s where I’m going. Feel free to discuss this in a non-shitty way in comments here. And if you’re one of those people who was inadvertently blocked by me, let me know so I can take a look.
Thanks for listening.
I do not have nor have I ever had (nor will I ever have) a Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or any other social media account. I do not feel like I am missing out. In fact, I know I’m better off without them. I’m pretty sure we all would be. In my opinion, their negatives far outweigh their positives. The best thing for everyone would be to shut them all down.
Well, I honestly think there isn’t much good coming from criticising social media if you well and truly have never participated. When this started, there was a promise to it. After all, there has to be some reason almost everybody went on the merry-go-round for fifteen years. In its essence, social media is a way to connect with other people, and that’s something humans crave.
However, the Bad has so mightily outweighed the Good by now, and it is mind-blowing. I made ‘the cut’ about three weeks ago, and I think it is an overall good decision. But here’s the freaky part: I have withdrawal symptoms. I have no other way to describe it. I feel anxious about missing out (like, real bad FOMO), I sometimes get on the web with the itch of communicating SOMEHOW and most avenues are dead.
It does something weird with my brain, and I am waiting for some real positives of this.
Anyway, maybe we could try and think up a social media platform that actually works as intended again? The only idea I have in that regards is that it has to sustain itself without ads.
I’ve dealt with that withdrawl multiple times. For multiple different electronic communications. It sucks, but it dissipates. Eventually.
Hi Wil, what I hate most about these situations is how they suck the energy out of life. We are too old for this schoolyard bullying. The boys who sat in the corner of the yard, bullying the kids for their pocket money. (Maybe that’s a British metaphor… Do you guys have pocket money ). Those trolls need to get a life.
You’re a very reasonable man, thanks for sharing your insight!
Well put, Wil! As some other commenters though, I have to wonder: why are you on Twitter? Is it really worth it?
Overall, I find it worth being on Twitter. I’ve been exposed to ideas and points of view I hadn’t considered before, I follow some incredibly intelligent, perceptive, and funny people, and I’ve made a lot of friendships through it. For the most part, at least for me, the good very much outweighs the bad. But there are times the bad gets overwhelming and I need to take a break. And when I see people like Wil and Anne and other good people getting vicious trolling just for speaking their minds (especially since Wil and Anne are two of the kindest people I’ve met online), I get angry and frustrated and I wonder if it really is worth it.
I’m personally on Twitter because I Iove seeing people I admire in one way or another (from their acting, their writing, their creative minds, their political activism, etc) interacting with each other, sharing ideas, sharing behind the scenes tidbits about their industries. For example: Frank Oz’s Twitter feed has been a joy to follow, seeing such a humble man happily share his stories about his life and work; or seeing the writers and other creators involved in Star Wars geeking out with each other about obscure bits of lore in that shared universe they’re the keepers of.
Because in general, it’s real people, talking to each other about what they love and care about.
The seventh message thing is brilliant. Thank you!
Damn, it really sucks that this happened again. I honestly don’t understand why people do that.
I don’t know if this is the place to ask, but I think I was one of those innocents caught in the last block nuke. Could I ask for a review of my block?
My Twitter handle is the same as here: @uldihaa
I’m glad you acknowledge that block lists are blunt instruments. I once nearly subscribed to a block list you use, until it was pointed out to me that it contained lots of innocent trans people. At first I was gutted that you might be a transphobe, as it didn’t seem like you. Then I remembered that you didn’t compile the list and might be unaware of the situation. I’m not sure if any of the trans people involved reached out to you or not. But it was a lesson for me not to trust block lists.
Yikes. I subscribe to several of his lists and must admit I just plastered ’em on, wholesale, without review, in a fit of pique. Which one contained lots of innocent trans folx? I would like to make sure I sort it!
I try to keep an open mind about people because I am convinced that nobody is born as a dick. Everyone has reasons (even if those reasons might sound shitty to me) to behave as they do and people who bully others usually have their own sad story to tell.
Still, when I read accounts like this I can’t help but feel angry. Why do people do stuff like that? Why do people get out of bed one morning and decide “Hey, today is a good day to try and really hurt someone.”? I just don’t get it.
I think it’s amazing how you deal with this, Wil, even though I am pretty sure that bad stuff like this stays with you much longer than it should. I know the feeling (even though I KNOW it means nothing I a toxic remark in Overwatch can haunt me for days – one of the reasons I stay well away from twitter) and I hope you get out of this as fast and as unscarred as possible.
I did just post something which for no apparent reason got swallowed up.
So, I’ll just leave a virtual hug. Hang in there, Wil and don’t let those people get too much to you.
The first two letters of Twitter should have been replaced by ‘SH’ ages ago.
Every single time I look at even the most sincere tweet the replies look like a life view of the sewers beneath a toilet after taking a dump.
As for social media rules I’ve got a real simple one :
don’t say/write anything you wouldn’t do if that person was a giant standing in front of you …
only an idiot would want to say something that gets them crushed like a bug.
I think i might have been blocked on Tumblr (@maustown), which is probably because I can be irritating or sound condescending because of my lack of mastery with the foreign language, English. But frankly, I think that’s okay. I don’t get to decide if other people want to be exposed to me or my words in any way – in the same way that I myself mute people just because they bug me and little more. I can enjoy your writing and postings without interaction just fine. I certainly have no right to anybody’s attention.
That being said, I’m sorry there are so many idiots online..
Sorry you get so much shit on the internet, man. You seriously do NOT deserve it. Live happy with the knowledge that there’s someone in the world that will staunchly defend you in the face of some judgmental asshole and the army of trolls behind them. Love all your writing, in particular your recent posts about “starry night” and “panic attacks suck”. I will only say that I am RIGHT THERE WITH YOU bub. But that’s a very long story I actually do hope to share with you one day. In the meantime, sleep as well as you can (I will too) and keep plucking along. It’s covered by some really nasty pairs of societally imposed perception filters, one of which is called “fake news”, but I do see light at the end of the immediate tunnel, so to speak. If you really want to laugh, ask me what I envision their version of hell is. Anyway, have a great day, and know you’re awesome. 🙂
I think I have been one of the that were blocked about a year ago but honestly I’m not sure why because I have always tried to be polite and respectable to other people.
My twitter tag is my name @stephenmalovski so take a look if you can.
I can never understand how someone can feel better about their self by tearing others down. As a country we seem to have this “anger” that has infected us as a nation. We are never perfect as human beings, but we should strive to reach that. We have forgotten how to debate. Debate should be a way for people of opposing ideas to present their point of view using evidence and persuasive language. Today, people do not debate they disparage. This starts at the top with our leaders. Congress, POTUS, SCOTUS no longer debate they divide. Please everyone as the last few elections have shown EVERY VOTE DOES COUNT. Get out an make your vote count in the mid-term elections. Let our leaders know that this countries has only grown and gotten better when we as a country take a hard look at ourselves and ask. Are we really making things better or are we just so caught up in wanting to one up the other guy that we lose sight of what best for our country. Understand that it is our similarities that make us Americans, but it is our difference that make America great. I guess this has probably gotten off topic somewhat. Sorry, but thank you for reading.
Thank you for this post. I have a quick temper, and although I’ve worked hard on it and have become pretty good in reigning it in for the People I love and/or care about, I still know it’s a week spot. Metaphorically I can’t drink just ONE glass of wine, so I stay off social media even though I am a technophile and used to be an early adopter of everything. – And sometimes it’s hard to be left out of a lot of stuff.
I admire your restraint. I admire, that you try to be a Gentleman about this horrible issue. I admire, that you try to explain at all. If you would block everyone you had never personally met it would be your choice alone. If you would block everyone who has a mole on their ellbow, I’d consider it weird, but still… your choice alone. You get to choose who you interact with.
I am an introvert. I am not shy, I have not a hard time talking to People, and I can enjoy myself at a Party, so nobody believes me, when I say it – but it exhausts me. And it took me a Long time to be able to say the words: “You seem like a great person, but I simply do not have the capacity to treat the good Friends I already have the way the deserve it, so I try not to add anyone new for the time.” if I meet someone at a social Event and that persons asks me to do something together. I am not trying to be mean. I am trying to protect a. my sanity and b. the People I love from being neglected or being treated badly because I am stretched too thin.
If I’d be under constant demands from Angry People I owe nothing to like you are, I’d be so furious and wrathful, that I’d find a way to burn the Internet down, and I will never understand why anyone is so pathetic to draw Attention to the fact that I was virtually rejected and did not get enough love from EVERYONE on the net – oh, woe is me, somebody out there doesen’t like me! sniff…. But Maybe it’s because I am an introvert. I need to limit my contacts, so I naturally prefer those who like me and have a good reason to do it.
So thanks again for showing how to be good, even if you don’t feel like it.
(PS: sorry for the abominable English. It’s not my native tongue.)
Wow! what a awful experience. This is why I don’t like social media it’s a tool for cowards to hide behind other cowards who follow one another. Good luck Wil GODSPEED…….
Stuff that like happens and a way to get attention. Social media is a double side sword
Good for you Mr. Wheaton
Well said. With any internet communication, including this one, I wait until I finished my rant. Then I re-read it ALOUD to make sure I am not being mean or petty. And yeah, I count myself as an ADULT and not a pissy over grown child in need of a nap.
I understand everything you are saying but based on this and other recent posts I’m worried that you are focusing too much on negativity. I hope you can find some things to be really excited and happy about. In order to help:
Growing up, Wesley was my favorite on TNG.
I get excited every time you show up on TV or Youtube.
I don’t care that there were rules errors on Tabletop
Would you change anything about this advice for places like Reddit?
Well said, Wil.
This is precisely why I never created a twitter account and I never intend to. The very herd mentality philosophy that twitter is built upon only empowers those individuals who are immature, hateful, socially inept and psychopathic, and the idea that they can behave the way they do anonymously lends superpowers to their psychopathy. It’s not even a good media for communication because of its “soundbite” format, which itself is a kind of dumbing down of communication. In ten years, when you get to be my age now, you’ll wonder why you wasted away so many valuable hours even thinking about twitter. I never joined facebook either, because I knew from the beginning that the whole story about its creation was false. It’s the greatest trick the Intelligence agencies have ever played on a society – getting millions and millions of people to freely turn over every aspect of their lives and secrets to them without a single bit of coercion involved, even pictures of themselves and their loved ones, and even all of their social connections. If only the KGB, SS, and Stazi could have thought of that. It was pure genius!
Bravo!
Writing your novel?!?!
Several responses leapt to mind at once.
First, Way to go! If you are motivated to write, I’m impressed, and cheering you on. (Partly because I am not disciplined enough to do mine today, mostly because I want to read it)
Second, I admire your gumption 😊 Instead of allowing the problem to remain the elephant in the room, you are addressing it in as healthy a way as you can.
Play more games, enjoy your family, and please keep writing
Some people are just horrible assholes. I don’t understand why people have to treat others like shit. I am glad that you block those toxic pricks from your life. It’s like they have nothing constructive to do with their time, so they decide to attack other people for the entertainment. I don’t understand why someone would troll you or verbal attack you. Maybe, I don’t understand the hate towards you, because I see you as an actual person. A lot of people think celebrities owe them something, for whatever reason. You don’t owe people shit. Don’t let them get under your skin, just flick them off, like a booger.
Very sound advice to give. Personally, my social media outlets are basically blogs and FB. I don’t do Twitter as I still value my job (work for a guv’ment agency that I would desperately love to give a public flogging to), but I have learned a lot about how to treat people in the cyber world over the past dozen years or so. Learned all about toxicity from the chat rooms (mostly on the receiving end) so I try to treat everyone the way I want to be treated.
Haven’t been purged/blocked by someone in about 8 years (last time was when an author shared a post about a hot button topic and got upset with me when I tried to get her to elaborate as to why she supported said hot button topic)., but I have done the same to others when the vitriol about a particular subject has gotten to the point of intolerance (and it takes quite a lot for me to block someone since I have a very high tolerance of stupid).
Howdy Wil,
I only look at your site once or twice a week, so I just saw your post. As someone who had a real problem being bullied in his youth (years gone now) let me say be another of the people saying I’m sorry that mess happened to you. I know how much it sucks. And that makes what I want to say even harder, because I owe you an “I’m sorry” that’s an apology in addition to the sympathetic one I place above.
I don’t think I’ve ever said anything bad about you on the internet, but in my pre-internet day I was one of the people making horrible jokes about your TNG character and say unkind things about you with my friends. I let a dislike for a fictional character bleed over into saying mean things about you personally. That was really shitty. I was a dick. I’d be shocked if you had ever heard of me, but that doesn’t matter. I’m glad I’ve managed to realize what a cool person you are. It’s helped me to remember to separate people from their TV personas. Thank you for that. And again: I sincerely apologize for unkind things I’ve said.
Well said, Wil. Twitter is both vital and irrelevant at the same time, with not enough controls, too much wild-west frontier bullshit. I suspect if they had a business model that made money, they may act more responsibly. Alas, in the absence of that, what better than to have your brandname in the news headlines Every. Single. Day. by virtue of the tangerine nightmare’s childish rants. In any other platform, such vile hatred pedalled would result in immediate bans. I’m not certain any of these public ‘social’ platforms are healthy for us in any case.
I’m sorry this shit gets under your skin, you possess more compassion to fellow humans than most, Wil, and the downside of that is being sensitive to hateful comments and trolls.
Wishing you ongoing peace and happiness.
I also have no clue as to why I was blocked and added to the “block list.” Maybe it is because I tweet about the Washington Capitals? We have mutual “friends,” at least in the online world. Whenever these people retweet something from a person who is on your block list – guess what– I can’t read it. Which is unfortunate because it is typically regarding a product, article or book that I would likely buy, read or promote. Please take a look at my account @itsgayle. I appreciate it.
Unblocked! Sorry about that!
I’m not sure I understand this. Maybe it’s because I’m not a twitter user and/or I’m not famous, but it seems to me that twitter causes you some anxiety and it may make sense to cut it out of your life. If there is a large number or group of people who post things that upset or depress you, probably not paying attention is the best way to go.
Its kinda like trolling them. While you paraphrased Chris Hardwick, I’ll paraphrase my mom. “The best way to deal with bullies is to ignore them. If they aren’t getting a rise out of you, they will go away and find a new target. Feel free to support that new target.” She was right. In my 41 years I’ve been able to shut down bullies simply by allowing them no audience. Of course twitter will allow an audience but if it’s not you, it’s kind of like that tree that falls silently in the woods when no one is there. Sure you see that the tree has fallen, but it’s just a hurdle, and you can easily surmount it.
“Just ignore them, they will get bored and stop.” is the advice my mom gave me when I was bullied at school.
I did as she said and it only got worse. In my personal experience, standing up to bullies is way more effective.
Ouch. I can here hoping from some respite from the recent news, and you had his name right there in the middle of the page.
Hey Wil, I’m @SerPounce_a_Lot on twitter and I always thought you were a great guy. I actually unfollowed the jerk you are talking about when I saw what they did, but you had already blocked me. I understand completely that you need to protect yourself, but I really miss seeing your posts. Either way I appreciate you and I’m sorry about the stuff you’re going through.
Sorry about that! Unblocked.
Thank you so much, you’re awesome! ❤❤❤
You’re not a dick, I’m not a dick….it’s all cool. Loving your blog – have a good day..x
I’ve never posted a comment on this blog, Wil, though I do read it regularly and listen to your podcast.
In light of the news about your friend though, I felt compelled to write and reach out.
I don’t know what is true and what isn’t, I don’t know any of the people involved, nor do I really know you.
Yet from what you’ve shared in the past, my first thoughts when hearing about it went to you.
Regardless of what happened/happens/will happen, I sincerely hope you take care of yourself. I imagine the immediate future will be difficult to process and I wish you strength and faith and hope to deal with this. Be kind to yourself.
This is why I’m glad I’m not known, or a brand, or remotely twitter famous or old school famous. (not that I have any talent or skills that could make me so anyway). It seems like a nightmare if you ask me. I’m happy following about 30 people on twitter and having about the same number follow me, b/c it limits the crazy.
Super response! Is it okay to say your proud of someone you don’t know? Because I feel proud if you. Sorry – high school principals probably process things weirdly.
I tried to get back into Twitter recently and just couldn’t for a lot of the reasons you described here. Basically, I’m tired of the mean, and I just don’t see how it can be fixed there.
I’m sure someone has probably already pointed it out to you previously, but there is Mastodon — I’ve landed on a cool, nerdy instance with admins who are great at moderating and folks that just celebrate their passions / interests.
Dear Wil. I’m one of the blocked people. @cole_belle. Can you please undo it?
yep. all done. sorry!
I’ve fiddled, flailed, and flopped around half-assedly with all of the social media toys since the beginning. I’m currently dipping toes with WeChat in China (I could write a whole thing on WeChat), but not taking it seriously. Maybe a hundred people casually “follow” my mini-adventures around this part of Asia. I’ve got a shizload of Twitters and a YouTube channel which I don’t give any attention.
For me the only value of social media is the potential for creative serendipity and just cold, hard cash (fuel for more creative serendipity… and food). However, the cash part does not scale well. And I’d have to make 100,000 “friends” just to get $100 from Alpha-fawking-google each month. Psychologically, I am barely interested or capable of handling friendships with 10 people, never mind 10,000. I generally prefer to vet peeps F2F, but, of course, this is not always practical when it’s so easy to meet someone online on the other side of the planet.
Also, I’ll say it. Pearls before swine. I just don’t like people in general. They disappoint me. It’s not hate. It’s just that I rarely prefer their company. Most people are dull, thick, and flavorless. I’m not a hermit. I have friends and relationships, but it’s a small circle. My take is esoteric and pointy. People don’t like that.
So I keep my stew.
I like your suggestion of starting at the seventh message, but my feeling is that Twitter won’t change… The very idea of the service is to spout out flashes of thought instantaneously with reflection or restraint, and that paves the way towards the rule of the mob. It’s OK for anyone to use a blunt instrument if they just don’t want anything to do with imbecile farts, ahem, tweets. I don’t even see a need to justify that.
I do some things in life on a fairly small scale, pretty much because I know that expansion means Twitter and YouTube and I do not have the bandwidth for it. I am a 63 year-old woman, technologically rather competent, and with very little ‘filter’ left, as is common to women of my age. I could go that bigger route, and yet for exactly the reasons of the scenarios you describe, I limit my contact to a few thousand folk a year instead of tens of thousands. Sometimes I feel sad about that. Not often.
You do you. I think you do you fabulously well. I would not follow you otherwise. Write on…
Hi, just wanted to say, hope you’re doing okay and take all the time you need to respond to this weekend’s news. You don’t owe the public anything and aren’t required to make a statement about a close friend.
Hope the time gives you some clarity and I also hope that when you do speak it will be to say the right thing… but again you don’t owe us anything!
All the best and keep on being awesome!
Everytime I read one of your posts I gain something positive. Thank you for be you and sharing so much of yourself. PS. I glad you and Anne found each other and I real enjoy both of your posts.
Twitter is not a healthy place to spend time. With respect, it would be better for your emotional health if you deleted your account. Well, that’s probably not possible for a known person. Better – just block everyone by default, delete all history, and use it in a productive way, namely to announce your projects and publications. There are 1 billion people on Twitter, and as that is a large enough population to be representative of humanity itself, then fully half of them are, by definition, below average. Don’t go hang out where half-a-billion pinheads lurk. A much better idea would be to take your hot wife out on a date and then call up one of your awesome sons and tell them how much you love them. (or call both, hell, go all out 😉
Lather, rinse, repeat. Happiness ensues.
You don’t owe the Twitterverse anything and you aren’t going to affect any change to humanity by being there, nor will you enlighten or enrich yourself or any of your loved ones. Said simply, Twitter is a marketing/advertising scam. It will never help you and it will always hurt you as it’s designed to do that in order to promote itself by turning misunderstanding into outrage and outrage into class warfare and the resulting drama into advertising dollars.
Greetings Wil – I too have found myself blocked and don’t know why. I read this post and don’t think I’m a follower of some YouTube personality who is super offensive…although I confess I’m not up to speed on who all I follow. I’m @badblood on Twitter and thought that perhaps my username was filtered simply because of it being the word it was. I actually told a friend that I must have gotten mass blocked inadvertently. Hopefully this is the case and you can unblock me when your time allows.
More info: We met in person at WPBT in 2006. I’m good friends with Brad W. (of P****Stars) and I’ve had occasion to hang out at a Steel Panther show with Shane N.
If I did indeed do/say/follow something that caused the block to be intentional, I certainly apologize, although I can’t quite fathom what that is/was.
Of course I remember you, blood!! It must have been a false positive. I’ll take care of it right now.
Much appreciated sir. All the best to you and yours!
This was an engaging read with several learning points band takeaways. As an Orthodox Jew, possibly the worst action is to embarrass another person. I can’t believe how entitled the people on your feed can appear. This is FREE content. You are giving these words away and all you are asking in return is common courtesy. Wil, name a cause (non-political) and I’ll donate $18 to it. Thanks… A long time fan who was here in 2002 but went away for 16;years what did I miss?
Sorry, let me clarify. I meant the people on your twitter feed. The people on this page are awesome!
Love your kind and thoughtful comments.
Hi Wil, I’m new to your blog and just accidentally sent a rambling comment on your other page (the awesome intrusion post). I had meant to comment on your troll post. I just found out my real-life D&D friend is an online troll and enjoys spreading vicious comments about people like me…to my face he is nice. He says I just “don’t get” trolling, and that I should be basing our friendship on our face-to-face interactions, and not his Twitter troll persona. He says that’s the way it works, and that I just don’t get it. I guess that I don’t. But reading your blog and some of the other people’s comments about Twitter trolling made me realize that maybe I’m not the only one who hurts from this. Thank you for posting about it. If you have time to read my comment on your “intrusion” post, I’d really appreciate it. You’re so awesome.
I replied to you on that comment. I’ll tl;dr here: this guy sounds like an awful person who does not deserve your friendship, time, or attention.
Hi Wil, as far as I’m aware we’ve never communicated on twitter.
I’m not a gamergate person, nazi or anything of the sort so I’m not certain how I came to be blocked.
If you find the time could you please remove @Quiltbagism from your public blocktogether list?
Thanks.
I tried to look at your account to unblock it (sorry about that) and I see that I am blocked by you, so there’s nothing I can do.
Its your life Wil. Live it…we are not friends, we have never met. I would never presume to put any requirements on your life. I enjoy what you do.. I think you are funny. I don’t agree with everything you say.. But hey, I am intelligent enough to make my own decision. Keep doing what you are doing.. and don’t get dragged into the mud by people who have no say in your life..
I like your response . well said
It seems like most people unanimously agree that Twitter is a toxic waste-dump of a social media outlet(both right and left of center). I just have to wonder why so many people still use it and embrace it? I have an account only because one was created for me using my email address by someone out of the country. If this had never happened I would still not be a part of Twitter. I actually dislike the fact that my email address is attached to a twitter account, but I leave it active simply to make sure that no one else can fraudulently use my email address to create an account. When I first discovered the fraudulent account I decided to try it out and followed a half dozen folks who exclusively use Twitter to announce updates, and things that interest me. But the more I interfaced with Twitter the more I disliked it, and the less I used it. Why not disengaged from the service, and lead by example to help others shed this dumpster fire from their life?